15 year old girl, knowing pick up times in advance

[headb4ng]

My daughter is no3 regularly going out with friends and we are providing the usual taxi service. The problem is that she normally can't tell us the pickup time until last minute. So we may not know where she is. She tells us that her other Friends don't tell their parents in advance me either. What do people reckon am I being unreasonable asking for pickup times and locations well before she goes out?

[Travelledtheworld]

YANBU.
I would expect my 15 yo to give me a pickup time and location BEFORE she goes out.

Where is she going, anyway ?

[specialsubject]

they all lie about what 'other friends' do. Ignore.

if she wants to go out, she needs to be more considerate about the taxi service.

[nickstmoritz]

Agree. If you are the taxi then she needs to agree the terms with you. It's fine to be a bit flexible but I would want to know the pick up time and place etc. If your DD doesn't do this then withdraw the taxi service. Just say these are our arrangements, what other people do is up to them. I now always ignore the "other people's parents this, that and the other" whinge.

[monikar]

Yes, I agree with the others. I agree with my DD17 the time and location before she leaves/is dropped off. If she wants to stay a bit longer then she will text and ask me - I can usually be a little flexible but not always, it depends on my other commitments.

[nickstmoritz]

What that girl is doing is called "relational bullying" - (sometimes relational aggression) it's very interesting to read about it with your DD. We have had this before happening to my DDs and I found a lot of the info useful as a talking point. It can be very serious but hopefully your DD can stand strong.

[headb4ng]

Thanks everyone. Just needs a bit of reassurance on approach :-).