Has your teen been slobbing around all day during the holidays too?

(30 Posts)
Sahmof3 Sat 10-Aug-13 08:59:41

My 14 year old daughter has done absolutely nothing with her time since she broke up from school. She gets out of bed around lunchtime, slobs around all day in her pyjamas and spends the entire time on her ipod and mobile phone playing games and messaging her friends. She won't practise her instruments, refuses to do the small amount of homework set by school and rarely leaves the house despite my constant nagging. Do you think I should just leave her be? Part of me thinks the rest may do her good before she starts on her GCSE courses in Year 10, the other part thinks she is wasting valuable time when she could be preparing for the next school year, or at least doing something a bit more worthwhile. Also, do you think I should continue allowing her to have lessons for her instruments when she can't even be bothered to practise during the holidays? Any ideas how to constructively occupy a teen during the hols? Any advice much appreciated!

wigglybeezer Tue 13-Aug-13 15:08:24

I gave up fighting with my DS (15) this summer. He has spent almost the whole time on his PC playing games, he claims it will be his last chance to slob out as it's his first year of big exams this year.

On the plus side Autumn term started today so I have entered his lair and hoovered! Still smells a bit though.

DD1 is doing stuff but we're moving away so she spends the time with her boyfriend, probably snogging and talking in a funny voice. <sigh>

DD2 is 13 and happily lying around lazily. It's nearly 3 and she climbed out of bed not too long ago. Sometimes goes out with friends, but going out with ME is her idea of a nightmare.

It's going to be amloooong holiday. Thankfully I have a happy 5yo who wants to do stuff.

pixelchick10 Tue 13-Aug-13 01:24:02

My DD (14) has done nothing either ... no instrument practise, bit of shopping/hanging about with friends, a lot of watching American sitcoms/vlogs on You Tube, some filming of her own vlogs, saved slightly by some tennis playing/bike rides ... I despair!! Why don't they use their time more productively???

WorrySighWorrySigh Sat 10-Aug-13 20:27:27

DS has just walked in through the door from a week away at Army Cadet camp. Not sure that he has washed much but he has had a blast. Field craft, ambushes, shooting, orienteering, camping out with minimum equipment.

He is absolutely shattered and more than a bit smelly but I am very proud of him!

bruffin Sat 10-Aug-13 17:49:21

Agree with Lynette, school holidays are meant for lounging about.

DD didnt surface until 12 today, but this week she has been helping at an SEN club mon-wed. Had an impacted tooth removed under GA on thursday. I quite expected her to be in a bad way for about a week but she wanted to go to the club on Friday so went in for the afternoon.

DS has a casual job but has been turning down shifts that start at 5.30am (he did do one) which i secretly dont blame him. He will start to run out of money in september. Today he was up early but has had a few attempts at his personal statement today, then gone of to watch tv. He is still in his jamies.

ArthurCucumber Sat 10-Aug-13 17:29:12

Nine. The whole of July and August confused.

NINE?!

ArthurCucumber Sat 10-Aug-13 14:14:27

Oh, I'd be happy to leave dd2 to her own devices (as I do dd1), if she was reasonably cheerful about it. It's the lying about until mid-afternoon and THEN grumping that she's bored when all the shops (her only hobby) are about to close. All my suggestions dismissed with a sniff. For nine weeks.

Our two have done a lot of slobbing - dd1 (18) hasn't even got dressed beyond joggers and a cami on some days! But they have also been out for a few lunches with dp and I, seen friends etc.

DD2 (16) spends a lot of time camped out in her room with a few friends, watching films (in fact they are up there now), or sitting on the roof with them. DD1 tends to go out with friends, rather than staying in with them.

PeriPathetic Sat 10-Aug-13 14:11:08

OMG she's up and out! She's been forced persuaded to go out for a walk with DH and the dog. She spent ages doing her hair and smiled too. shock
Wonder what she's after.

fuzzpig Sat 10-Aug-13 14:08:52

My DSDs (15yo twins) don't live with us so can't say what they are doing while at home (although I do know it involves facebook and telly grin) but they are going out with friends (they recently started using some of their allowance on one of those unlimited cinema cards) and they are both volunteering at least once a week with the company I work for (instigated by them, ie not forced). They have gone/will go on a few day trips with us, they are happy with stuff like summer fetes etc. They do like just mooching watching DVDs with us too.

DSD2 has also been helping their mum at work (charity shop), looking up uni courses and occasionally babysitting DS and DD for us. She has arranged a little camping weekend in their garden for a bunch of mates. She also said she wants to do some revision over the holidays but I'm not sure if she will feel the same when we get the books out grin

DSD1 we have barely seen actually as she is always busy, so I think mostly hanging out with mates, and according to FB she has a boyfriend <wibble>

They have never been ones to sleep late - their mum was very strict with bedtimes when they were little, and it's really paid off - they are very good at getting enough sleep. Trying to do the same with our DCs although they aren't nearly so compliant as their big sisters <sigh>

shockers Sat 10-Aug-13 14:05:59

Thanks to his paper round, my 13 yr old has been up at 6.45 every day. I have taken him camping a couple of times though (and DH has done his round for him grin)
We are quite lucky, living by a river, with all the good weather; I've spent a lot of time down there with DS and DD (both teens), having a grand old time.
I imagine being in our old house wouldn't have been as much fun, as they'd have been asking for money to go swimming etc., constantly.

They end up nocturnal.
I've had to get agreement with DS2 (15) that he must get to bed by midnight because he was in danger of doing night shifts.

MaureenMLove Sat 10-Aug-13 13:49:31

Hmm, whilst I think you should make your DCs pull their weight a bit during the school holidays, there will never, ever be a time in their lives when they are able to do this again!

Nowt wrong with getting them to keep their room tidy, do the dishwasher or run the hoover round, but I do think you're a long time working/being an adult, so let them be!

I think it is Lynette, but now there's FB there's all the pictures of teens doing stuff, and it makes me feel a bit 'Grrr why can't DS go and do some stuff'.

LynetteScavo Sat 10-Aug-13 12:39:47

I thought the whole point of the school holidays was to lounge around doing nothing! grin

My 14 yo has been quite active. He has been learning to tightrope walk. hmm But he's fixed one end of the thing he walks on (it's not a rope) to an apple tree, and all the apples are falling off and going to waste.

mrsjay Sat 10-Aug-13 12:35:29

oh i think we have all bonded with the What are we doing today nonsense, I have just shouted the princess of darkness to get up, she grunted

thornrose Sat 10-Aug-13 11:48:53

"What are we doing today?" at 4 o fucking clock makes me scream inside.

ArthurCucumber Sat 10-Aug-13 11:43:38

My 14 yr old isn't, but my 11 yr old is hmm.

14 yr old slobbing and texting a fair bit but also seeing friends, drawing, playing guitar, reading and willingly does any chores required. Generally cheerful.

11 yr old grumpy as hell. Sleeps late, and by the time she's up, clean, dressed, hair dried, brunched and BORED, most possibilities for stuff to do with the day have passed her by. She would play SIMS all day if allowed. Rarely even reads. Won't see friends as is in between schools - not sure why that's relevant! - and her best friend (who's going to the same school) is away most of the summer. She happily took part in a few activities I organised earlier in the summer (ours have been off for 6 weeks already) and will tolerate days out as long as it's involves buying stuff and eating cake, rather than any physical activity, in which case she moans throughout. As we're on a budget and I'm now trying to work at home, these opportunities are limited. Three weeks to go, and roll on bloody September.

Oh the 'What are we doing today' does my nut in mrsjay. angry

mrsjay Sat 10-Aug-13 11:13:21

no advice really sorry dd2 said the other day aafter getting up at 12 and faffing about said to me at 3pm what are we doing today angry

mrsjay Sat 10-Aug-13 11:11:03

yes she has it does my head in, sleeping till lunch time and flopping about the sofa, although she has met up with friends ( i suspect there is a boyfriend there) once a week and does go out sometimes I cant wait for school to go back middle of August for scotland it has been a long summer, sigh

DS1 (14) has done bog all this holiday. Except moaning and bickering with DS2. Oh and sleep til midday and eat all afternoon.

He doesn't want to leave the house especially with the family.

thornrose Sat 10-Aug-13 09:43:39

That's the problem Peri, when they do have to get up it's a bit of a rude awakening!

I want mine to get up early today because there's a really fun event in town I want to drag take her to.

I'm actually dreading her reaction.

PeriPathetic Sat 10-Aug-13 09:25:33

Yeah. Except mines 11. I've pretty much left her to it as we've just moved, but we are going away for a few days tomorrow so she will have to get up, dress and do stuff. I expect fireworks.

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