Mumsnet Talk

Hello, I am 16 (17 in 2 months) and i hide used SP and food wrappers around my room in draws cupboards under bed etc. but never leave in obvious places. I know I SHOULD NOT do this but i do and i know i am doing it but i don't know why i am doing it - i do a large amount of family laundry (DM DF and 2 DB) i have a bin in my room and in the bathroom and share a bathroom with my dad and both brothers

this has been going on for 4 years
PLEASE HELP

I should add i have low scale aspergers syndrome and ADHD

This is really common with Aspergers Syndrome. I'm a member of an online group of parents of girls with Aspergers (my 13 yo has AS) and this crops up all the time.
The good thing here is that you want help. How are things generally for you? Are you managing other areas of personal hygiene?

Oh and massive high five to you doing family laundry, I can't imagine my dd ever doing that

other areas of my personal hygiene are all okay i think (occasionally forget to brush my teeth)
but i really need to know how i can stop doing it my mother is at her wits end

Have you tried any kind of intervention from CAMHS? Have you heard of CBT? In a nutshell it is a therapy that unpicks behaviour and helps you to change the way your responses.

never had any intervention form anyone and am going to see the local nurse tomorrow. I have heard of CBT - but only because of studying it in the mental health section of my psychology AS Level.

I have always been to scared to see anyone about it and am only doing so now because my parents have said i have to (but ultimately it is my choice)

I wonder why you are scared of seeing anyone? How do you feel about it? If no one "made" you change would you be ok to continue with what you do?

I wish i new why i was scared of seeing anyone
I hate the fact that i know i am doing it but still do it
and if no one "made" me change Nope i wouldnt be okay with it (i doubt a lot of people would be) i just hoped i would grow out of it eventually i guess but after 5 years i dont think that is going to happen

Well that's a good start, its good you are not ok with it. I think you need some very specific help.
Your actions are a form of OCD, you need specific help to deal with it. When you see the nurse ask her to refer you to someone that can help you. Don't be afraid, it's really not that shocking or awful.

Thank you so much i will ask her to. Now i realise that i do have to see someone (and i was in denial before) you have been a great help.

Aw, I feel like I'm talking to my dd in a few years time. You sound amazing by the way

aww, i should really talk to my mother about it more openly but if she ever brings it up i automatically burst into tears (that nurse better remember her umbrella) but my mum feels like she is dealing with it on her own and doesn't know what to do with me. and we do get on until she goes into my room and starts opening draws.

As the mum of a dd with Aspergers I get where your mum is coming from. My relationship with my dd is fraught with difficulties at times but I believe our bond is unbreakable. My dd can drive me mad but I just can't express how much I love her and want to protect her, bet your mum is the same.
Your mum is probably despairing because she is scared that your actions are setting you aside from your peers and she just wants you to be happy.
I hope it goes well with the nurse, sorry if I'm projecting

i think you are right - thank you so much for your help. xx

Your welcome, night night x

Ugh, I meant you're