Monthly allowance for 16 and 17yo dcs

(24 Posts)
goingmadinthecountry Mon 11-Feb-13 22:43:07

For lots of reasons (mainly we live in the middle of nowhere with no public transport and school work comes first) I don't want dcs 2 and 3 to work in term time apart from the odd bit of dog/babysitting.

Dd is 17, ds 16. We pay for (cheap) contracts for both on phones. What's a reasonable monthly allowance do you think? Not really clothes, just sociable money and buying presents/cards for friends. At least if they have a set amount they can start to budget a bit and hopefully save a tiny bit (both have savings accounts for birthday money etc). I know it's a how long is a piece of string question, but would appreciate any input.

deleted203 Mon 11-Feb-13 22:46:28

I give my DD2 (17) £80 a month, which is a bit of a struggle, but it's roughly her child benefit money. She's now the oldest at home, and in the middle of A Levels. She pays for her phone out of it though, and anything else she wants. I buy uniform, bus pass, and necessities. She has to cough up for anything I consider a 'luxury'!

goingmadinthecountry Mon 11-Feb-13 23:06:00

Thanks, that's about what I was thinking. I seem to be forever handing out cash at the moment! They do both work really hard at school and that is what they need to focus on at the moment.

sparkina Mon 11-Feb-13 23:22:04

Dd (16) I send £100 over to her a/c every month. She has to try to make it last. I do probably end up sending more over if she's off school on holiday and socialising a bit more but normally this covers it.

BackforGood Mon 11-Feb-13 23:30:10

Wow!
ds is in the 6th form. He's 16. He gets £16 a month from us and pays his own phone out of that.
He then decided it was worthwhile getting a job.
Ultimately it depends on your disposable income to a greater extent, but personally, I don't spend anything like £80 or £100 on 'bits and bobs' for me, so I'm not sure why a teenager would expect to have that amount of disposable income just for 'pocket money'. I guess if they've grown up having that kind of amount spent on them each week / month, then they have different expectations.
I think a good lesson to learn is that you need to find an income source if you want to fund expensive spending habits.

goingmadinthecountry Mon 11-Feb-13 23:33:16

Sparkina, what about clothes?

goingmadinthecountry Mon 11-Feb-13 23:42:19

BackforGood, a job really isn't an option where we live without me doing 2 x 20 mile round trips to the nearest town per shift/session. There literally is no bus after school hours and a taxi is £20 from town.

I prefer my children to study and achieve at school (they are bright and very dyslexic ds works very hard at it).

deleted203 Mon 11-Feb-13 23:46:10

DD works in the summer and saves what she can. You don't spend £20 a week on yourself? Like goingmad we're pretty rural - if she wants to go into the nearest town (a metropolis of 3,500 people) it's £5 there and back on the bus. So she can probably afford to fund her phone, go into town and meet friends for a coffee and buy herself a magazine/lip gloss or something at the weekend. We're hardly funding expensive spending habits!

I don't buy clothes. (Apart from uniform). She's a Primark girl - and has to pay for it herself.

sparkina Mon 11-Feb-13 23:47:59

Hi that's just really for socialising, train fare when going out, gifts for friends and little extras like make up etc. I've been doing it this way since she was thirteen as i've never been good at physically having any cash on me so hate scrabbling around or making pitstops at cash points before taking her somewhere. i opened her an a/c with a switch card so she isnt going round with alot of cash. We pay her phone and clothes separate.

sparkina Mon 11-Feb-13 23:56:12

I agree with you re jobs at the moment. My dd is doing a levels and attends drama school three times a week so she needs to keep her focus on studies. She appreciates what she gets and has been taught to understand the value of money.

goingmadinthecountry Tue 12-Feb-13 00:00:56

Ds told me tonight his switch card ran out in 2011! I guess that's job number one.

To be honest, I think this will save us money. It will be interesting to see how they do. Dd2 has always had a more responsible attitude than ds.

Dd1 has £40 pw at university (uses our Amazon a/c for books sometimes) in catered halls - needs to buy weekend evening meals though. She copes very well on that.

PhyllisDoris Tue 12-Feb-13 00:14:35

Mine get £25, plus phone contract. I buy what I consider to be essential clothes and toiletries, they buy the frivolities, and pay for their own social life.

AllDirections Tue 12-Feb-13 00:28:32

DD1 is 16 and she gets £10 a month and I pay for her small phone contract.

I don't have more than that so she does some babysitting, teaching guitar and making videos for extra cash. She'll also apply for regular work shortly too. Even if I could give her more money I'd still keep her a bit short so that she'll work because I think a work ethic from a young age is important.

And I expect her to study and achieve at school too!

goingmadinthecountry Tue 12-Feb-13 07:08:24

I really think this is when the impracticality of country living hits in. There really isn't a financially viable solution, or even a doable one. There isn't even a pub they could wash up at within 3 miles.

sparkina Tue 12-Feb-13 07:41:01

I think it does save you money this way and at least you know how much you've given them instead of trying to remember all the dribs and drabs you've handed over. Plus it does teach them how to budget and realise the value of money more when they see how easily it slips out their a/c. My daughter is desperate to get a job but it just isn't viable at the moment either. She already is showing a great work ethic through her studies and drama tho if she wasn't the luxuries would stop immediately simple as. Good luck with it all going mad hope it works out for you. X

DD 17 gets £85 a month from which she puts £10 into a savings account ( where she tries to put most of her Christmas/birthday money), gives me £10 to contribute to phone costs and from the rest she has to fund everything else except school uniform so presents for family and friends at Christmas/birthday, clothes, make up, entertainment and bus fares into our nearest city- £7 return- if I am not happening to be going in when she wants to.
She makes a bit of extra money in holidays by making and selling craft items/jewellery etc.
Again we are rural- she was offered a job in a nearby town last year in a hotel kitchen which she really wanted to do, but the cost of getting there ( not on a bus route from here without a change in the city) would have left here with about £3. And for shifts in the evening I would have had to go and collect her as no bus still running .

Rarely runs out- has once asked for a loan to buy an item we thought was worthwhile which she paid back over three months from allowance.

DD 14 gets £65 and his deal is the same except I will buy him the odd pair of extra trousers ( cheap not branded) as he is growing so fast that they keep getting too short too quickly.

It has saved me money and arguments. Both have learnt what are good and bad buys, that Primark is your friend, that actually mum's ordinary shower gel from tesco is as good as the posh stuff they used to want and that you have to make choices in life.

Theas18 Tue 12-Feb-13 09:51:52

Interesting. DS is desperate to get a part time job, though actually we do pay for everything for him and willingly as he studies so hard and volunteers too and that is where we want his priority to lie still even at 17. I think he wants " his own" money IYSWIM.

DS1 is 17 and gets £50 a month to cover entertainment and clothes. I pay for his school bus and lunches.
We are as rural as you and I fully appreciate the problems. I wanted DS to find a part time job, not for the money but for his own personal development. He works one evening a week in the nearest large village which is 5 miles away.
In order to get him there I have to pick him up from college (college bus would make him too late) a round trip of one hour, I then have to drive him to work and pick him up later. It would be far easier to give him the cash wink but the experience is good for him.

cory Tue 12-Feb-13 13:48:29

Dd (16) isn't able to work due to poor health (in fact, she is struggling with school as it is).

Atm she is getting a monthly allowance of £16, which only has to cover non-essentials; when she moves up to Sixth Form she will get more but then have to buy more of her own clothes etc. Can't afford as much as £100/month though, even with clothes: I can't afford to spend that much on clothes or "bits and bobs" for myself either. But maybe £50.

Because her poor health is probably going to be an issue for the foreseeable future, I would rather she prioritised, got the best school results she can and simply learnt to do with less spending money. Otherwise, higher education is going to be very very difficult for her.

When I went to uni, I found myself at an advantage compared to my friends because I hadn't got into the habit of casually going for a coffee or buying myself a magazine as a matter of course; I thought carefully about every expenditure and made money go a long way.

GetOrf Tue 12-Feb-13 13:54:00

DD gets £80 a month (the child benefit, though that will stop now). I also pay for her contract on top of that and give her a fiver petrol money a week (for her moped so a fiver goes a long way).

She pays her bike insurance out of that and clothes and assorted nonsense. She also works one 6 hour shift at Asda a week as well to top up. She saves half her wages. She gets her wages and allowance on the same day in the month so teaches her to budget monthly.

I have given her the child benefit for a few years now. Works well and almost stops 'muuum can I borrow a tenner'.

I agree that rural living must be hard for teens. I am very lucky to live in a city (albeit a small crap one).

higgle Tue 12-Feb-13 15:27:15

Both my sons have worked - DS1 min Tesco and DS2 in a local take away.
DS1 saved £10k before he went to uni which has really helped set him up now he is living in London in a shared house - deposits, working a month before being paid etc. really mounted up. DS2 is going travelling with some of his earnings before he goes to uni. We continued to pay small amount of pocket money to both - just to encourage them, really. I pay DS2 £30 towards his clothes and £10 for his phone. DH gives him £20pm. DS1 used to have his pocket money and I bought his clothes as he had no interest in them (all changed now)

WorriedTeenMum Tue 12-Feb-13 21:17:43

DD gets £100/month to cover all clothes, haircuts, phone etc. On top of that she gets £5/day for each day she is in school to cover bus fare and lunch at school.

Another where jobs are really not an option. DD volunteers on Saturday mornings so has limited time available.

amumthatcares Wed 13-Feb-13 08:29:07

DD is 18 and in her second year of A levels. She 'earns' the £20 a week (Family Allowance) we give her by doing household chores. She also has a weekend shop job. We pay her phone contract, toiletries and essential clothes like winter coat etc (though at 18 they seem to be themally insulated and not in need of a winter coat wink). She pays for everything else. She also runs a car. We pay for tax/mot and maintenance and she has to save for her insurance (HUGE amount of money) and pay her own petrol because we refuse to pay for her readiness at taxiing her friends everywhere for nothing grin

goingmadinthecountry Wed 13-Feb-13 22:26:11

Thank you. Ds and I have agreed on £80 a month and I've given him £40 for the 2nd half of Feb and will set up a standing order from next month. Have said I'll provide necessary clothes - he has plenty at the moment. I think it'll take him a couple of months to learn to budget but it's all good for him.

Nos 2 and 3 are pretty good - do grass cutting/car washing/looking (brilliantly) after no 4 as needed etc.

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