Allowing BF to stay over??

(10 Posts)
SwivelHips Sat 19-Jan-13 09:37:53

DSD will be 18 in June and has been seeing a boy for approx 5 months. She doesn't usually do 'boyfriends' so this is the first boy she's taken an interest in.
Anyhoo, she asked last month if she could stay over at BFs, I said yes and kind of talked DH into it (it saves her coming home on bus at 11pm that kind of thing). Next day he decided it wasn't right blah de blah. The following week she asks if he could stay over here, DH said NO and that was that.
Roll forward 1 month and she wants him to stay over tonight, they're on the same shift today/tomorrow morning. Again I dont have a problem with it but DH won't be happy.
I rationalise this as a) I know she's taking precautions b) if they're here we know she's safe c) they're doing it anyway so lets not kid ourselves DH d) DSS (27) is in the room next door to her with his bloody girlfriend.
What do you think; am I too soft?? (I will use thread as either ammunition for DH or DSD whichever way it goes)
thank you smile

sashh Sat 19-Jan-13 10:19:36

DH will never be happy, this is his little girl. He will feel the same way when she is 30.

Get him to watch this, he will identify.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zhdpBCCChMk

Ask your dh what he wants to happen in June? Does he want dd spending every night she can with bf?

sashh Sat 19-Jan-13 10:21:34
DeafLeopard Sat 19-Jan-13 10:25:19

She's nearly 18 and has been with him several months? I think that is perfectly ok.

Not soft at all, pragmatic.
I'd say make him welcome and retain the best possible relationship with your DSD.

SwivelHips Sat 19-Jan-13 12:22:37

pmsl at the youtube link sashh smile

Thanks all, I'm going to get DH to read this thread, wish us luck...

mysweetie Sun 20-Jan-13 14:36:46

I don't know but in our culture it will not be allowed. With my DD, I would not let it. :D

specialsubject Sun 20-Jan-13 16:58:18

she's nearly 18. If you allow her sibling (effectively) to have the other half stay over, there's no difference.

just check she is clued up on her contraception and is having sex willingly. Oh, and ask them to keep the noise down. :-)

usualsuspect Sun 20-Jan-13 17:02:18

I wouldn't have a problem with this at all.

ConnieM1970 Mon 21-Jan-13 15:09:38

I would allow it as long as they are being responsible. I don't want my kids bringing their casual bf's or gf's overnight but once they've been together for 6 months or more I've allowed it. Like my daughter said, mom we can sneak around and do it in the car or we can be honest about it and sleep here.

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