Do your DC still see their school friends now that they've left school?

[whatdoyoucallaproblemlike]

Just that, really. DD is home from her first year at uni and is a bit down because she was so excited about seeing her school friends again, but they are always busy or seeing other people. She hasn't seen anyone all holidays, but she said they kept in contact during term. Feel a bit sorry for her.

[lastnerve]

Aw that must be rough for her,

However I think the worst thing you could do is draw attention to it, there could be innocent reasons or not so innocent reasons but either way its her social circle and sadly you can't do it for her.

[whatdoyoucallaproblemlike]

I know. Today was the first time I said anything to her, and it was only because I saw one of the girls in the supermarket. I just hate seeing her sitting in the house by herself.

[fussychica]

Know how you feel. We moved back from Spain a year ago and that means DS has no local social circle from school. Thought he might get a job & meet people but no luck on that one. Luckily he has been away to see Uni friends a couple of times and we are all back to Spain for a couple of weeks when he hopes to get together with his Spanish friends from school. He is very self sufficient as an OC and it doesn't seem to bother him but I still feel for him.

[lastnerve]

I can understand your torn, but what did u actually say?

I think its important you don't make her feel ashamed iyswim. if she is being left out it will cause a lot of problems having 'her worthlessness' compounded by her mother from a teenage point of view.

I had this one year I was in school and my mother constantly brought it up and made it so, so much worse than It was already I'm sure you'll have more common sense just speaking from personal experience.

[whatdoyoucallaproblemlike]

Thanks everyone! I just said 'I saw x this morning, have you not heard anything from her?' (this girl in particular used to be at our house all the time), DD said no, she'd texted her a few times but nothing had come of it. So I just said 'well, people grow apart' and left it at that.

fussychica DD seems find too, a bit lonely occasionally. I hope your DS enjoys Spain!

[lastnerve]

you handled that well OP :)

[whatdoyoucallaproblemlike]

Thank you!

[Parttimeslave]

Yep. Ds2 in similar situation. Very quiet first 4 weeks of summer. Then I made a couple of suggestions for getting a job and now he's working for the rest of the hols and made some new work mates too! I think a lot of his old mates are also working and seem to have busy lives. I think that first summer after uni is a tricky one. They may be a bit "out of sorts" leading two very different lives. I understand how you feel though. I hated seeing ds2 so bored at home. I find it hard not to say anything - but I have to bite my tongue and let him get on with it! x