Rudeness creeping in

[IssyPeach]

What to do? DS (15) consumes vast quantities of electricity - by which I mean the second he's back from school, without asking me, puts internet/X-box on (and computer if he has it in his room for homework from eg a previous evening). Then on for hours and hours. I do try - this is going to sound so feeble. I try to entice him off it, to involve him in other things but he doesn't engage - hardly even.

This week he has picked up a bit because he's on work experience at the local vets and thoroughly enjoying it - so much better than school. However, last couple of days, as well as continuing this insatiable desire for the x-box etc, he's been really rude. Take today - came home for lunch - on way out of his room before going back to the vets, I turned his radiator down and he rounded on me - I should've asked his permission. What? Who pays the bills - and what a waste when he's not in his room and it takes minutes to warm up once he's home. Along with the elec, he goes to the thermostat, no permission asked, and turns it up high.

So, he is wasting resources, our (limited amount) money, his time and now sees fit to be distant and plain rude. Eg 'What?' (sharply) when I call him; critical beyond words about the food in the house; and now, to top it all, critical that I don't ask his permission to turn off his radiator when he's nowhere near his room.

Until not long ago, was a dear, friendly boy - from goodness knows where, a critical, cold attitude to me has come in and I'm feeling so hurt and, frankly, used.

Thoughts, ideas gratefully received ..

[crystalglasses]

Welcome to the teenage world.

[slug]

The X Box, computer and wifi router all have power cables. Get in the habit of removing them.

I'd also be tempted to offer him a choice. Use a spreadsheet to ilustrate if you are sad like me so inclined. He can have, for example, either two hours on X box or half an hour with temperature turned up. If he wants both, the money for the electricity can come out of his pocket money or he'll have to work for it. There's no harm in teaching him the cold hard truths about budgeting before he leaves home and gets himself into debt.

[IssyPeach]

Thank you, all. Mumslife and crystal for your realism and slug, for your practical ideas. DS knows I have a horror of getting into debt and needs therefore to know the possible ramifications of his behaviour - he really has a seemingly insatiable desire for hugging the radiator, hugging the x-box and is less and less inclined to talk to us, read, do school work and certainly rarely ventures out.

I see that serious changes are needed, not least for his benefit.

It's not unreasonable to turn a radiator down/off if a child's not likely to be in the room for several hours? And not unreasonable to just do it - she who pays the bills ...?

[noddyholder]

Get some earplugs and keep them in until he is 19.