Nooooo don't cut your hair....?

(56 Posts)

I have long hair. Wavy when left natural with a fringe that is semi grown ou.. nearly to my chin. Hair is amost bra strap length, coloured with some highlights on top.

I'm 45 and bored with it.

I have booked an appointment and am intending to get it chopped off...thinking a chin length bob or not much longer, partly as I would like to grow out much of the dye and see what I have (grey partly I think!0

But when I mentioned it in the staff room today I got a chorus of NOOOO don't cut your hair! I don't THINK I'll regret it. I've had short hair, long hair inbetween hair before.

Yes it's easy for school (my job) to tie it back, but it's also easy to just scrape it back and never make an effort with it. When it was shorter I did bother more!

I was feeling confident about cutting it but now everyone's reactions have made me feel unsure sad

My hair from the back...

I do love a classic bob, do have lovely hair! Does your hair grow quickly? If it does then go for it if you really want to.

ThatVikRinA22 Wed 18-Sep-13 18:52:52

well - it depends how sure you are i guess.

i have longer hair now and i much prefer it - ive had it short twice - hated it - and had it bobbed which i didnt mind but now its long, i realise that its just more "me" so i feel more confident.

remember if its wavy it might take a bit of styling if you go short....

I'd keep it long and do interesting stuff with it- am 55 and have longish hair- definitely trying to avoid a mum cut ! bobs are great but a bit boring- long hair much more adaptable. Truth is I look younger and better with longer hair (and I;ve had short,medium and long) !

MsApprehension Wed 18-Sep-13 19:17:27

I've had people say this to me my (hair has been hip length to chin length) but at the end of the day, it's hair- it will grow back! If you want a change do it! smile

pantsjustpants Wed 18-Sep-13 19:22:38

I've just decided to go for the chop too! I regularly grow and then cut it off.

I want it shorter but also it's over high-lighted and I hate the colour. I'm going to lose the frazzled ends and then colour it.

Go for it! It's only hair and it will grow back grin

SundaySimmons Wed 18-Sep-13 19:25:56

Just have a trim!

Oh, and how on earth did you manage to balance that clock on your head? ;)

VelvetStrider Wed 18-Sep-13 19:31:48

I'm with your colleagues I'm afraid. You have stunning hair, I wish mine looked as thick and luxuriant at that length but it tends to go all spindly. And you want to swap it for a greying middle-aged mum cut!

If the issue is just boredom, could you maybe experiment with colour? Go fiery red or ebony or golden blonde or bright pink (if work will let you!). Or you could add some choppy layers or have one of those Brazilian straightening treatments, or even a bubble perm!!

IMO the only people who can carry off a bob without looking dowdy are those with poker straight hair (or those prepared to spend an hour with the ghds each morning).

GemmaTeller Wed 18-Sep-13 19:34:53

OMG - are you me? I've just shown DH and he's shock grin

I have a spiral perm on mine and get loads of nice comments on it.

I love long hair

outragedofsuburbia Wed 18-Sep-13 19:41:31

I would just say your hair suitable for a bob? If you hair is quite thick and wavy a bob might not be good. I have curly hair admittedly but as it grows the weight pulls the curls out so it is more wavy unless blow-dried and it looks horrible in standard bob, needs to be graduated and then the shortest bits are quite short.

If I could grow my hair again to your length overnight I would do it so in your shoes I would leave it as is.

GobblersKnob Wed 18-Sep-13 19:55:35

I currently have just past my shoulders hair and tomorrow I am having a pixie cut.

I am also having a huge wibble for the same for the same reasons as you, everyone keeps telling me not to, but it's hair, it will grow back right?

Also like you, I am wanting to do it to get rid of my colour, I have been henna-ing for a couple of years and the bit of ash blonde root I have next to the red looks horrible. I have a fair bit of grey too and I am a lettle bit scared of suddenly having very short grey hair. But hey, I say go for it, a change is as good as a rest grin

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea Wed 18-Sep-13 19:59:45

Cut it!

I did this 5 years ago and everyone said it took years off me. confused smile

Hmm ok I am getting the same sort of vibes that I got in the staffroom !!! sad
My hair IS thick.. very. Naturally wavy as per picture (tho my hair isn't as two tone as the pic shows..not sure what happened there!) and still lots of layers that are sort of growing down.

I have had bobs before.. GHDs necessary! I'm not overly thrilled with the current colour which may be part of my desire to chop, but I'm also a bit worried that at 45 I might soon look like I come to work on a broomstick!

Wish I was better at making up my mind!!!! DH doesn't help.. he's bald and always says 'well at least yours grows again!' True but not really helpful and he really doesn't seem to have a preference!


I looked at your photos on your profile and definitely cut it. I'm a hairdresser and would have no qualms chopping your hair off as it'll suit you.

If you can afford it get professional colour done too, some chunky hi/lowlights perhaps?

I'm 45 and have long hair but have it in different styles plus my face and bone structure is different to yours. You'll look amazing.

It's good dh doesn't have a preference. I hate it when I hear women say their dh won't allow them to have their hair cut! shock

I don't work as a hairstylist now as have a different job but still do friends and family.

ithaka Wed 18-Sep-13 20:14:58

I would cut it short & sharp - but do NOT go grey. The beauty of short hair is that you can have fun with colour - it is much easier & quicker to colour than long hair & the condition doesn't get wrecked because it keeps getting trimmed.

I went short recently & love it - and I get so many compliments. It stands out from all the usual mid length layered highlighted mid 40s mums.

anothermonday Wed 18-Sep-13 20:16:53

Your hair looks very like mine. I had it all chopped into a bob about 6 months ago. I loved it for about 5 minutes, and now I'm fed up and growing it out. It is far, far too much work, and really a bit too thick to ever look properly sleek even with ghds. It's not helped by the fact that I live somewhere hot and my hair frizzes every time I step outside, but even setting that aside it was not the right style for my hair.

How about a little shorter with some layers, especially around your face? I saw a lady with hair like this recently and it looked lovely, in a low maintenance way. That's what I'm not aiming for.

VerySmallSqueak Wed 18-Sep-13 20:21:03

Mine is much the same and I am much the same age.

I have also been considering cutting it of late but I think I've realised it's 'waist length blues' !

I've done it a couple of times before and regretted it and grown it again.

Why not do what I've decided and have a couple of inches off to tidy it and hopefully stop the tangles a bit,and explore some lovely new ways of wearing your hair.

I know every time I've had mine cut I've wished I'd done that instead.

ControlGeek Wed 18-Sep-13 20:25:11

Could you do a version of the MN haircut to reduce the length a bit, get some layers into it, and see how you like the different lengths? That's what I've done and on Saturday, having decided I like the shortest length, I'm having the hair dresser cut it all at that level (just below shoulder length). Just don't go too drastic in one go - perhaps hold your head upside down, follow a chunk of hair from what is normally the underside of your roots, bunch it in a band at that level and cut across. When you put your head back it'll be in long layers.

kaumana Wed 18-Sep-13 20:30:55

Nooooo, I'd love to have such lush locks. As suggested above, perhaps some highlights and lowlights and a few layers to give it some swish.

LazyGaga Wed 18-Sep-13 20:38:33

I would get it chopped to about shoulder level. It will feel fresh and swishy and in much better condition.

VerySmallSqueak Wed 18-Sep-13 20:40:38

You'll miss it when the winter comes....

CerealMom Wed 18-Sep-13 20:41:02

I went from bottom of bum to above chin bob. Like you I have thick wavy hair. It did me no favours, think a cross between Cousin It and Wicked Witch. It also was always scraped back and consequently my scalp was sore from the weight of the 'scrape'.

Currently my hair is about 6 inches below collar and I don't know what to do with it either. Still 'scraping' for everyday function.

I dream of a sharp chic bob (and Brazillian blow dry).

WetDog Wed 18-Sep-13 20:59:38


I just had a good six inches+ off mine.

I've gone from having long layers like yours and a long fringe to a shaggy bob that I can wear curly or straight with a blunt-ish fringe.

I've dyed it bright, bright red (it's usually red but I'd let it grow out for a couple of months and it was kinda orangey with bad roots) and I love it!

I've had loads of compliments. Shorter hair actually suits my face better, it lifts it. Long hair pulls my face down and scraped back in a ponytail does nothing for me.

Today I had someone very senior at work compliment me, which was really nice smile and I get lots of people in shops asking me about it. It does make you feel good smile

DuchessFanny Wed 18-Sep-13 21:22:20

I think a tidy up ( or no shorter than shoulder length at most) and dye it a lovely chocolate brown maybe, the ends of your hair look that colour from the picture and look lovely and glossy

Coconutty Wed 18-Sep-13 21:25:19

I would get it cut into a funky above shoulder length and get some bright colour slices put through it.

RaisingArizona Wed 18-Sep-13 21:42:47

You do have lovely hair but had a peek at the pics on your profile too and agree that I think it would definitely suit you in a just below jaw length bob. But only if you can be bothered with straightening of a morning. I think *coconutty's' suggestion would be lovely too.

kaumana Wed 18-Sep-13 22:49:59

Sorry, but I don't agree with getting it cut short, I have looked a your profile pic and yes a change will be good .BUT you have very thick curly hair which when cut short makes for a lot of time styling/ straightening.

MangoTiramisu Thu 19-Sep-13 09:02:59

I have similar hair to yours but mine is a bit darker brown. I do not dye my hair because I like my colour which I inherited from my mum,a chest nutty colour. I go through phases where I want to lob it all off and get similar comments to you. Looking at your picture I would say that it just needs freshening up. I would get it styled a bit more and maybe a few inches off the length and a bit better shape round the face. Then I would concentrate on the condition. Mine is in tip top condition as I have spent the past few years consistently trimming and using argan oil and other treatments. Why not have a keratin treatment which would make it a bit less wavy (although I love waves) and very shiny and healthy.

kimimimi Thu 19-Sep-13 09:19:12

I think this is a good example for a wavy bob low maintenance,no ghd

specialsubject Thu 19-Sep-13 09:22:29

be aware that it may not necessarily grow back. Follicle cycle length changes, if it has shortened your hair may not grow that long again.

just paid a lot of money to have my ultra-frizzy hair relaxed so it looks like yours!

MrsOakenshield Thu 19-Sep-13 09:25:02

I had all my hair whopped off when I was mid-30s, I realised that I was wearing it up all the time and as it was just starting to go a bit grey I decided short was better all round (not judging but I think a lot of the time it's hard to get away with long greying/grey hair - I didn't want to dye it). Never regretted it, and had many comments on how much it suited me and made me look younger.

Go for it!

MrsOakenshield Thu 19-Sep-13 09:27:13

kaumana - I have much thicker, curlier hair than the OP, all it takes is decent shampoo and conditioner and a good curly hair creme (I'm using Trevor Sorbie beautiful curls), can leave it to dry by itself most of the time. I wash it every 3 days, in between I just wet it in the shower and the style usually bounces back.

IceCreamForCrow Thu 19-Sep-13 09:29:48

Have it cut/coloured but don't go too short all at once.

I'm 40's and it's taken 2 years to grow out v short cropped hair to chin length bob. Most of that time I nearly gave in because my hair was just awful and all over the placehmm Yes hair grows again it's true, but it can be an agonisingly slow process. Don't do anything too drastic at first would be my advice.

ENormaSnob Thu 19-Sep-13 11:24:12

My hair is similar to yours but darker and a bit more curly.

I had a graduated bob a few years ago and loved it. It looked good straight and curly.

Currently debating on doing it again as its just up all the time atm.

Thinking of having a fringe and cut to just below shoulders for winter, then shorter in spring if i still want to.

HaveAGoodDay Thu 19-Sep-13 12:37:10

What a big pussy (cat) you have....(sorry couldn't resist after peeping @ your profile pics).

I like long hair. I think once you have it long & you cut it you regret it, like myself. I had lovely long hair about six years ago, why I had it cut shorter I'll never know, but over the years I did & then trying to grow it again has been a real ball ache as I like to colour mine so the condition isn't always at its best. Besides I think shorter hair takes more faffing on with.

So if you haven't already I would just go for a trim, sorry not adventurous and or a colour maybe?!

squoosh Thu 19-Sep-13 12:57:38

I'd cut it.

I definitely wouldn't go for a bob, but something just past the shoulder would be nice. Also your waves will probably become wavier without all the excess hair weighing them down.

I cut my hair from a longish bob into a pixie cut about 6 weeks ago. Pretty much everyone on here told me not to, that it would make my face look fat, that longer hair was more flattering. I got it done anyway and LOVE IT. When I posted pics (still on my profile) everyone agreed it looked much better. Sometimes it pays to be brave, and at the end of the day it is only hair and will grow back soon enough if you hate it.

bigTillyMint Thu 19-Sep-13 13:53:26

I got this a lot before finally getting mine cut from waist length to shoulder length. I was probably about 45. I have extremely thick hair which is wavier when long, and I was just wearing it tied up all the time.

I much prefer it now - I can have it loose or tied up. It is in a layered, shaped around the face with fringe shape.

Snatchoo Thu 19-Sep-13 16:50:39

I've got my hair cut like this and I love it. So much easier to look after.

Mine's longer now, I need it cut. Mine wasn't as long a yours, probably bra strap length maybe, but I love it now. It's just more interesting than 'long layers all over'.

Snatchoo Thu 19-Sep-13 16:55:01

BTW Jemima love your cut!

It is only hair, it'll grow back if you hate it.

GemmaTeller Thu 19-Sep-13 21:19:01

OK, here goes......

I'm 54 and mine is a darker version of this

I love it and my DH loves it more, I'm just not a short haired person.

Wow Gemmateller that hair is fab. I suspect mine would be like that in a few more inches (and allowed to be curly as it likes) If I could go instantly silver overnight I'd love that. Sadly mine is just developing the odd grey streak .

I THINK I am going to see about the colour first. I hate the highlights I have...they are wrong for my colour and look more like grey. If the hairsresser can tone them down to a nice even non offensive brown to match the under layers I shall keep the length for a little longer.

Mostly prompted by my eldest son and eldest daughter going 'NOOOOOOOOOO' as well grin

GobblersKnob Thu 19-Sep-13 21:47:34

Well I did it grin

Went from from shoulder length to pretty much this a couple of hours ago.

It looks fab if I say so mysef, so glad I bit the bullet, has taken years off me.

Ooh, we need pics Gobblers!

Cutting mine short made me look younger too, it made my eyes look bigger and my cheekbones look more defined. I can't see myself ever going back to longer hair.

I cut mine short a few years ago and found that when the cut was EXACTLY right it made me look younger, but as soon as it grew out even slightly, or if I went slightly too short in the fringe for example it was really ageing. So basically in a 6 week cycle between cuts it looked fantastic for about two weeks in the middle, the rest of the time it was not good at all.

Mine is very similar to yours OP, not quite as long, and darker and I do wonder about getting it cut shorter as it spends most of its time tied up now (I'm mid 40s. so this might be the last time for it to be long). But having spent the last 4 years going through masses of variations on shorter as I grew it out, I really do like it better long, it is so easy to put up in lots of different ways and I love being able to have it in a big cascade down my back. So I'd say keep it, it looks fabulous in your pic.

SwedishEdith Thu 19-Sep-13 22:54:40

Agree that there's a 2-week window when a bob looks good. And the growing out stage can look really frumpy. I'd keep it longish

I knew it would! smile

kiwik Fri 20-Sep-13 03:31:51

Mine is very similar - although I'm blonde, not dark. Short does not work with my hair, as the shorter it gets the more wavy and unmanageable it becomes. The length pulls out some of the curl and makes it easier to handle.
I try and wear mine differently each day for variety, so that's seven different styles a week, although at weekends I often opt for the scrape it back into a ponytail solution.
I never wear it down at work, and often do a Gibson roll, or some sort of variation on a plait or pleat.
I only tend to wear it down when going out, and have the time to make the waves look sleek and controlled, rather than the riotous mess they often are.

Chipstick10 Fri 20-Sep-13 07:26:51

I would get it cut. It could look much more edgy and you will be amazed at how great it can make you feel.

SavoyCabbage Fri 20-Sep-13 07:31:54

Definitely get it cut I say. I had long hair and now I have short hair and I look much younger and far more 'put together'.

HungryGeorge Fri 20-Sep-13 07:39:10

My hair was very like yours OP and I got it cut so it sits on my shoulders a few months ago.. regretted it ever since.

Don't do it.

SundaySimmons Fri 20-Sep-13 07:55:33

I agree with hungry george, don't do it!

Whilst you are young, make the most of having long flowing locks.

I don't really get posts saying "I did it and hated it, don't do it". OP is a different person, with different hair, a different face and a different hairdresser hmm

She might like it, she might not, but a person's hair is their own and I'd have thought it obvious that your (general) experience has no bearing on hers. I've had short hair that I've loved and short hair that I've hated. But I've never regretted having it cut well maybe once, it's exciting and freeing. I think if a bunch of colleagues told me not to cut my hair it would make me determined to do it!

ginnybag Fri 20-Sep-13 09:53:45

I have hair like yours, only mines down nearly to my knees!!!

If you want to cut it, cut it - but, for God's sake, make sure the hair dresser knows what they are doing with hair like ours. Somebody 'just cutting' it will cause you nightmares for months!

I cut mine short, once - and I was Hermione Granger, even with the straigteners and the blow drying and the product. My hair needs weight to stop it being a frizzy, sticky-out mess - or it needs a spectacularly expert cut.

Where's the thickness in your hair? Mine is all from the back of the head, just above my neck.... it does not a good, short style make....

polyhymnia Fri 20-Sep-13 09:54:33

Definitely get it cut. Go to the best hairdresser you can so it's a good shape . Shorter hair doesn't have to be boring. And get it coloured too by best colourist you can find.
I know lots of people love it and it can be versatile but I'm not personally a great fan of long hair at any age, unless it is really well cut and doesn't just sit there .

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