Styles you'd like to wear but can't?

(104 Posts)
SantasNaughtySack Thu 03-Jan-13 13:07:25

This year I'm planning to stop trying to wear things that jut aren't 'me', however much I'd like them to be! Does anyone else have this problem?
I'd love to do the androgynous look occasionally, like boyfriend jeans and a plain loose Tshirt- but I just end up looking fat and butch.
Likewise with chunky knits- gorgeous on other people but I look like a Womble sad
And lastly, scarves. I feel like I'm missing out, their always mentioned on WIWT threads, and I see so many stylish looking women my age wearing them, but I look in the mirror and just end up feeling silly.
So no more! I will admire, but not covet.

Anyone else have styles they'd love to pull off but just can't quite manage?

SantasNaughtySack Thu 03-Jan-13 13:08:30

Just* They're*

Annianni Thu 03-Jan-13 13:14:35

I bought some ash wedge trainers and I look like a nob in them.

I also bought some all saints damisi boots and I look like a nob in them too.

I don't want to look like a nob grin

DolomitesDonkey Thu 03-Jan-13 13:16:35

Babydolls on other people = cute, girly, playful, summery
Babydolls on me = pregnant Mama Cass

Thumbwitch Thu 03-Jan-13 13:17:51

Anything floaty, arty and ephemeral - I just look like a frumpy bag lady instead.

I'd really like to go gothic but just don't have the nerve for it. Didn't when I was a teen, which would have been the right time to do it; don't have now either, which is 30y too late anyway. I save it for parties.

QueenCadbury Thu 03-Jan-13 13:19:10

Scarves here too. Love them but they look silly. Also can't do:
Collars -not sure why but they just don't look right on me. I love plaid and denim shirts but just can't wear them.
Ankle boots-I have short legs so they just make me look dumpy even though I'm 5'4. Calf length or a shoe boot looks much better.
Costume jewellery- again, it's something I love but just looks silly. I look better with dainty pieces
Anything too long that covers my bum as it just makes it look huger than it is. I don't like tunics anyway but I do like boyfriend type cardigans but can't wear them.
Skinny jeans/trousers-make me look like a parsnip. Straight leg and bootcut/flared are much more flattering.

As you can see I've also thought a lot about this and have realised with some expensive mistakes really what suits me.

noddyholder Thu 03-Jan-13 13:19:57

Racer back loose vests with a tan and no bra

4aminsomniac Thu 03-Jan-13 13:22:27

I can't wear any dress or top that has a twist detail between the boobs!

I thought I had just got it into my head about them, but went shopping with a friend yesterday, and she got me to try on a few examples. She totally agrees that they look very weird on me!

I am small framed (size 8), 5'6", and my upper body is petite IYSWIM, with small boobs. This type of dress makes me look as if I have a child size upper body, and make my boobs look very close together.

Of course they are every where at the moment, in lovely colors and lengths that would really suit me!

AllDirections Thu 03-Jan-13 13:22:36

Anything figure hugging sad

The 6 month pregnant look is only atrractive if you're actually pregnant blush

Annianni Thu 03-Jan-13 13:25:20

I used to wear racer back lose vests with a tan and no bra... daren't do it these days though, I'd scare the children.

Annianni Thu 03-Jan-13 13:26:06


digerd Thu 03-Jan-13 13:50:08

Sleeveless tops, high heels, short skirts showing anything knee upwards, and happened during the last 8 years. Before then I could wear anything I liked.
My weight is the same as 30 years ago, but the shape has changed and the skin wrinkled - dratted ageing process grrrrrrrr.

CharlotteBronteSaurus Thu 03-Jan-13 13:52:33

nice little sparkly ones with opaques
and short dresses
even when thinnish I am cursed with both thunder thighs and cankles.

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 13:58:08

wide legged trousers

anything not slim fitting on me legs

ifancyashandy Thu 03-Jan-13 13:58:25

Skater dresses. I'm tall and slim with E cup size but short backed with long legs so need to 'drop' my waist slightly (or raise it to Empire) else I look like a monoboob with a thick waist if I wear a seam right on the middle of it. I have to have that seam nearer my hips. Shame, as I really like the style and with ankle boots, it's a really easy style for work.

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 13:58:51


for sleeveless stuff just go to body pump for a year - i am both cellulite and bingo wings free first time in years

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 13:59:10

no one over 25 should wear skater dresses tbh

ifancyashandy Thu 03-Jan-13 14:02:27

Dunno Baddog I work with a 50 year old who looks bloody amazing in them. Not age that's important but how you style something.

Blimps, I'm 43 and wear leather leggings, sequin minis, short wool shorts - anything I want, so long as it looks good! Couldn't give a stuff about 'should / shouldn't' based on age.

ifancyashandy Thu 03-Jan-13 14:03:31

Blimps?! Blimey!

shine0ncrazydiamond Thu 03-Jan-13 14:08:11

I'd like to wear lots of things that sadly, I'm just too old for. I just about scrape by wearing short skirts,opaques and biker style boots... I'd really like to wear cut off shorts and Ash wedges but sadly I am many years too old.

I also suffer from something I call 'skinny fat.. ' so I am a size 8 /10 but very un toned and chunky knits or loose jeans for example, make me look enormous.

I'd also like to dip dye my hair. Another no -no at 41.

ifancyashandy Thu 03-Jan-13 14:19:49

At 41, you can wear all of those things! And dip dye your hair! Blimey, we're a long time dead - have fun with your clothes! FWIW, I also have Ash trainers and am often complimented on my look. I used to be a right frump but turned 40, lost 4 stone and thought 'fuck it'! Took a load of things I'd never normally wear into a changing room and just tried stuff on. You'd be surprised!

And do you ever get the Guardian? If not, buy it on Saturday - there's a weekly fashion article called 'All Ages'. They have 70 year old models in shorts who look freakin' amazing!

*Wrap dresses - I have no nice curves or titties to fill them.
*Boyfriend or masculine style cuts - I am narrow of shoulder and this stuff swamps me.
*Pencil skirts - love them but they make me look like an actual pencil.
*Skinnies with arse on show - I am far from large but self conscious about my rear end unless I wear heels to lengthen legs (I am 5'4). And even then I'm too scared to do it. I can't work out what is wrong with my arse either, but I feel the area where it connects to my thighs is out of proportion.
*Watches, bracelets - wrists too thin, I gave up long ago unless the item can be altered prior to purchase.
*Knee boots - fit me like wellies however narrow they are.
Anything waisted or elasticated at waist - I have a high waist/short torso so these styles appear badly fitting on me and frump up my silhouette. Belts are a no-no also.
*scarves - I suit them, I think, but the feel of all of that fabric around my neck irritates me.

As for age, I am 38 and don't really go by rules. But then I never wore clothes which were super young anyway, so there isn't too much of a transition for me to make. Shorter skirts still suit me better than longer, so I will do what is best for my shape and look until the time feels right to graduate to new things. I really think that changing styles with age is a fun thing and something to be approached with excitement - not depressing at all!

noddyholder Thu 03-Jan-13 14:27:03

I base nothing on age and all on what shape I am in.

ifancyashandy Thu 03-Jan-13 14:32:25

Hear hear Noddy

noddyholder Thu 03-Jan-13 14:33:19

I am 47 shock but know what suits me and boden it aint

MirandaWest Thu 03-Jan-13 14:35:39

Shift dresses. They are never going to work on my pear shaped figure.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Thu 03-Jan-13 14:36:23

I don't give a monkeys about age or rules.

But I look like a wanker in skater style dresses, which is a shame. Anything voluminous looks daft, including trousers.

I also like wool and cashmere but it itches me to death.

MrsCampbellBlack Thu 03-Jan-13 14:36:28

Dresses unless very fitted which basically means going out ones.

I have no waist really which rules out loads of stuff.

Am also short which again rules out quite a lot of stuff ie anything vaguely oversized as I just look I'm trying to conceal a pregnancy.

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan Thu 03-Jan-13 14:38:09

I live in dresses but they are incredibly difficult to buy as I am very long waisted and the waistline on the dress is usually nearer my bust than my actual waist.

So when I get one that fits I wear it forever.

shine0ncrazydiamond Thu 03-Jan-13 14:38:31

Oh I dunno! I hear ya... but there is not much worse than seeing someone dressed as mutton - and it happens!

I wore denim hot pants with opaques about 6 months ago. I thought they looked fine until my best friend howled when she saw me and told me in no uncertain terms that I was too old... and looked like a teenager from the back and an old bastard from the front... and no, I don't have lines or anything and am a reasonably good version of 41 I suppose.

noddyholder Thu 03-Jan-13 14:39:28

Mrs CB I am the same it is easier when I am slim but still could never do a shift. I really look bad in belted coats too I have decided.

MrsCampbellBlack Thu 03-Jan-13 14:41:13

Smarter shorts with opaques would work though shiney - although I agree the denim hot pants would be a trifle hard to pull off.

I'd still love to wear denim minis in the summer with bare legs but I know that look is best left to my garden now.

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 14:43:03

no you see I used to think the same about age but I saw myself in a short mini skirt hte other day and despite good legs, I thought " nope",

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 14:43:25

also think older women in bare legs and denim skirt - NOPE

demi moore knees

shine0ncrazydiamond Thu 03-Jan-13 14:44:15

Ah you know what I look like MrsCB... and yes, they were denim shorts and just... oh they looked fine in the mirror. To me. In a moment of madness grin

Anyway, you are the very epitome of style < I've seen the evidence > and I often think ' Hmm, would MrsCB wear this? ' when I'm shopping.

The answer is usually a resounding no.

shine0ncrazydiamond Thu 03-Jan-13 14:44:50

I wear minis fairly often but always with tights

noddyholder Thu 03-Jan-13 14:45:36

Depends my knees unchanged but would only go bare legged on beach holiday. Very short skirt that looks short (I know what I mean) can look cheap but with thick tights and cashmere etc nice boots not really an age thing. Also some things look more mutton the slimmer I am No pleasing me grin Acid colours no good on oldies

Zwitterion Thu 03-Jan-13 14:47:27

Lapels. Don't know why but they just don't suit me. Always has to be collarless.

Animal print - would love to, and it looks great on others. Sadly makes me look like a twat.

cathyandclaire Thu 03-Jan-13 14:53:37

Flat shoes.

I have v v short legs and look like I've been amputated below the knee in flatties.

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 15:04:48

No. This was with tights. Just looked stupid.

I'm newly converted to the age appropriate school.

Never thought I would be.
Too on the nose "trendy" can look ridiculous.

noddyholder Thu 03-Jan-13 15:05:54

I don't think anyone stylish does trendy though after about 35

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 15:07:56

It's like piercings or tattoos on old people or anyone look bad.

noddyholder Thu 03-Jan-13 15:10:10

I think anything extreme doesn't work as at 40 you aren't really making a statement. I have reverted to that french look again it never fails but does still look cool if you look after yourself and just look 'well'. Swore I was off stripes but am wearing today grin.

MrsCampbellBlack Thu 03-Jan-13 15:10:31

I look like a sack of potatoes in anything belted. A shop assistant tried to belt a dress on me last year assuring me it would look fab. Her face was a picture when she saw how utterly awful it looked on me.

I agree re. age appropriate but my definition of age appropriate is very different to a lot of people on here.

Interesting noddy.
I would love to hear exactly which stores/brands we think DO suit us. I've never pondered this before. Mine would be Aubin&Wills (sadly they are closing down), but the truth is I find most stores don't suit me, on the whole, and that's annoying. It's all kind of random and pot luck!

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 15:14:05

Agree re belts. That awful gok thing made me look shit.

noddyholder Thu 03-Jan-13 15:15:48

I know Gap FC and Cos suit and fit me. I love vintage too Never wear anything I wore first time round unless toned down! Last summer I wore cropped jeans white vintagey tops and flat sandals a lot and it felt 'right'. Today have navy skinnies navy and white striped breton and looks fine. I wear very little colour though just don't like it

Perhaps wheeling off topic a bit but..

I loathe those fucking skater style frocks. The cut is so weird and infantile, and I don't think any body shape can deal with that over the age of 6. If, like me, you have issues with elastic waists then these are a horrorshow.

It strikes me as a cheap and shitty formula that most high street stores are reluctant to phase out. I have this irrational hatred of them (NOT the people who enjoy wearing them, mind!) and think that they are deeply unflattering for both busty and flat ladies alike.

I have only just realized how passionate I am about this, I ought to start a thread...grin

noddyholder Thu 03-Jan-13 15:19:17

I have never seen anyone I know in them Which ones are they?

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 15:19:37

We are twins today nod

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 15:20:16

I agree tea cakes Plus they're common.

TrampyPants Thu 03-Jan-13 15:25:03

I look good in belted things, esp high waisted. I look dreadful in full/skater style skirts. I can't wear yellow or pastels. Or buttoned up things like blouses.

noddyholder Thu 03-Jan-13 15:25:55

I'd rather spend on hair and skin and wear white/grey/navy I just look like hooray in bright colours

MrsCampbellBlack Thu 03-Jan-13 15:29:42

I look like I've just got my swatch book from hofc if I wear too many colours wink

Hides from the colour police

MrsCampbellBlack Thu 03-Jan-13 15:32:16

Although talking of colour I really want one of these bags

dizzy77 Thu 03-Jan-13 15:34:15

Pixie hair. I do not have a pixie head, which i discovered only when my hair was and inch long: pointy nose and loads of hair that somehow sits 5mm from my head if there is no length to weigh it down.

Also can't do skater skirts or belts. Love a shift dress or tunic, or the sort of dress with waist ties you can do up behind. Anything that gathers round the wait then flares makes my bottom look like that of a hippo. And it's really not that bad.

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 15:43:15

Campbell. That's the very one I got in December with 30% off

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 15:43:39

I can't do hair off my head. Look like a Sperm

MrsCampbellBlack Thu 03-Jan-13 15:44:00

Oooh the pink? Surely they'll have another 30% off soon

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 15:45:10

Yup. Pink. Love it.

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 15:45:48

I wear lots of colour. But toning not contrasting.

In contrasting I look like Sarah Greene

BiteyWeeFucker Thu 03-Jan-13 15:49:27

A camel coat. I so want to wear a camel coat, but I am 5"4 and fat sad

moodychops Thu 03-Jan-13 15:52:21

Heels as I am quite tall sad

CrunchyFrog Thu 03-Jan-13 15:52:37

Maxi dresses. Look like a man in drag.
sad because I want to be floaty and ethereal, but can never be.
I'm a carrot shaped 10-12, large of shoulder and nork, short and thick of waist and devoid of arse. Excellent legs though. I always feel like I loom a bit, like Lurch or the nanny in Count Duckula. <sigh>

beanandspud Thu 03-Jan-13 15:54:55

I've always wanted that 'surf chick' look for holidays - coloured board shorts, little vest/bikini top, flip flops and long tanned limbs.

It didn't happen when I was 18 and I would look ridiculous now sad.

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 15:56:01

It's hard to like styles that make you look shit though, isn't it?

Like hating food you're allergic to

cardoon Thu 03-Jan-13 15:59:49

I love lots of styles that make me look shit ! grinsad

Charliefox Thu 03-Jan-13 16:29:18

Ooo, love that Gap pink bag. Love a flash of neon. Saw these in Selfridges today and swooned.

I'd love to wear a buttoned up to the neck, fitted, tailored shirt but I think you have to be almost flat chested to make it look good.

More form me:

Blunt fringes, like Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction - adore this look but suit center part wispy instead. Blunt fringes create a sort of shadow area under my eyes, and with insomnia i don't need any extra help there!

Also cashmere: However expensive mine always bobbles and goes a bit shapeless.

BadDog Thu 03-Jan-13 16:34:16

I always laugh when bloggers talk about a POP of colour


Yes - styleguile does it ALL THE TIME

Charliefox I am small chested and LOVE fitted button up shirts but they always billow on the boob.

Billow-on-the-Boob might make an excellent county name. I live there permanently grin

Charliefox Thu 03-Jan-13 16:39:40

Even with the right size shirt and a subtly 'enhancing' bra Teacakes?

Startail Thu 03-Jan-13 16:41:38

The sort of white stuff deep V and knotted dresses and crossover tops that are obviously designed to have D cups in them and are indecently low if you don't.

Likewise a lot of dresses that just gape under the arms and let passers by stare in at what little boobage i do have.

I can't size down due to very large hips, so shift dresses are a complete no!!!!

I'd love to be able to wear hats. Any type of hats. Other women look gorgeous in them, so why do I look like some kind of serial killer? I just don't get it.....

noddyholder Thu 03-Jan-13 16:44:44

Oh yes did buy pink in cos but paaaaaaaale not bright.

serial killer hats grin

charliefox - that is worth a try!

Mumelie Thu 03-Jan-13 17:08:15

Great thread!
I'm no good at baggy lose fit clothing having small shoulders and being very curvy. Has to be fitted esp at the waist.
I wish I could wear swimwear off the peg but 30gg boobs and a size 12 arse plus wobbly stretch mark tummy mean specialist scaffold if I want to go near a pool.
Heels of any kind - have knee and hip problems, plus small feet so end up in severe pain. They do look nice though.

Eliza22 Thu 03-Jan-13 17:17:37

But Noddy.... You look like a model/slender/clothes horse type of lady. (All of that, was meant as a compliment) and could probably wear anything.

When you're battling with time (I'm 50 and still look pretty ok, most days) you have to draw a line.

I had a lovely (I thought) pinafore style dress. Quite short but, worn with opaques and long boots, I felt good in it. DH didn't like it. My mother said, it was not my usual style and too short. I wore it anyway. Until ... 2 weeks ago. I went last minute Christmas shopping to John Lewis and caught sight of myself in said dress. It looked so crap, I went into the ladies loo, changed into something I'd bought for Boxing Day at relatives' house and put the pinafore dress in the ladies room bin!

Can't wear shirts - look immediately like an overly busty 16 yo school girl at the end of a hard day getting caught in the rain and waiting for the bus at a draughty bus stop ( with wrinkles obv). Doesn't matter how expensive the shirt is, I just look rubbish.

Trousers generally I can't manage. Fat thighs, bit of a belly, flat but flabby bum = disaster

Chunky knits = lumpy fat girl

Nothing strapless, nothing halter neck, nothing which draws attention to the norks. Occasionally, I try on some of the forbidden items just to check I am not being silly but nope, I just look like the chubby little sister trying on her tall willowy big sister's clothes ( no matter how fat or skinny I am at the time - fashion is not made for E cup, 5 ft 2, short waisted girls)

justasecond Thu 03-Jan-13 17:36:41

Sandals, I have a thing about exposing my feet as I have huge big toes blush. Live in pumps in summer.

ifancyashandy Thu 03-Jan-13 17:50:20

I'm 43. I do 'trendy but toned down' so, I have a flared leather mini (Zara) but I wear it with opaques, thick heeled ankle boots (Aldo) and a jumper or t-shirt or shirt (probably Zara or ASOS or Whistles). Or say, I wear skinnies (but Paige - eye wateringly expensive ones to get the fit), silk shirt from Massimo Dutti, conker coloured stilettos and, say, a tweed jacket from Zara. I get told I'm stylish a lot. Are they lying confused

Although helps that I work in a traditionally young and trendy industry.

Thumbwitch Thu 03-Jan-13 19:03:01

Eliza - I have that problem sometimes - I'm not sure if it's because I have kind mirrors at home (they tell me I look fine) or that reflective surfaces outside the house are just really harsh! But yes, I have left the house feeling that I look good then seen myself in a window/mirrors next to the escalator or wherever and just deflated. Never gone to the lengths of re-dressing while out though.

ooer Thu 03-Jan-13 19:32:50

I am an hourglass.

I can't wear low-rise trousers or jeans - they are really uncomfortable and leave my lovehandles haunches feeling cold!

Also dropped/ no waists look dreadful on me.

So do high necklines.

Double-breasted is dodgy also.

QueenCadbury Thu 03-Jan-13 20:49:48

Yes, I also can't do belts. I always used to feel like a freak when gok put everyone in them and thought it was just me who looked shit.

getorf I have the same problem with my waist and dresses. Have you bought one recently. If so please link. I'd love some new dresses.

spudmurphy Thu 03-Jan-13 21:47:46

Sleeveless shift dresses- so smart - but i can't - Sumo wrestler arms !!!!
Skinny jeans, t shirt and a blazer- the skinny jeans are low waisted , i'm an apple and they keep sliding down!!
2013 -i will exercise, lose the tum and the big fat arms.

BadDog Fri 04-Jan-13 02:22:44

Huge big toes ? Oh come on. I bet they're fine!!

ElectricMonkBelievesInSanta Fri 04-Jan-13 02:51:17

I mostly like my figure (short and hourglassy but slim), but it does make lots of clothes either very unflattering or just unworkable. Prime examples are:

* Tops which should be buttoned up - they just won't go past my boobs, unless they're much too big for the rest of me;
* Flared miniskirts - indecent, due to sticky-out bum and wide hips;
* Androgynous anything - just looks wrong;
* Drapey everything - I love cowl necks (and have a few very fitted cowl neck tops that do suit me), but I cant work anything more drapey than that even though I'd love to be able to;
* Strapless anything - even the best strapless bras don't stop it being uncomfortable and looking a bit tarty;
* Skirts (especially below-the knee skirts) with flat shoes - makes my legs look short and chunky;
* Fabric with small scale print designs on it - I don't even know why, it just looks terrible on me!

I now stick to a "grown-up goth" style - I pretty much live in black or indigo skinny jeans, very fitted vest tops and carefully chosen blazers in stormy colours, occasionally interspersed with loose chunky jumpers and/or very-slightly-a-line miniskirts. I have 2 pairs of heeled courts (one nude, one black), 2 pairs of Doc Marten boots in regular use (one with high heels and 14 eyelets, one in the classic style). Only my jewellery and my shoes keep it from being very boring indeed... I wish I could wear more interesting tops, but my boobs ruin everything very quickly by stretching it out of shape, or creating holes and making things go bobbly. It's very frustrating!

Eliza22 Fri 04-Jan-13 10:26:43

Thumbwitch.... Only went to that extreme cause I'd already bought something else !

I promised myself that when ds goes back to school I'm going to have a massive "sort " smile

NickECave Fri 04-Jan-13 16:00:00

Hey FreeButton I'm exactly the same. What do you wear? I live out the winter in sweater dresses, opaques and knee high boots but dread the summer as I've never yet found summer clothes that look OK.

Trills Fri 04-Jan-13 16:07:00

Is it just me or is anyone else reading this thread and occasionally thinking why on earth would you WANT to wear that? grin

Trills because there's always someone who manages to look amazing in a binbag particular ensemble that makes us mere mortals think 'Yeah, that glittery hot pant and jacket made out cabbage leaves would be a great outfit!' grin

hattymattie Fri 04-Jan-13 16:43:26

I'd like to be able to pull off those mad men dresses and shoes. Alas 'tis not to be.

I'm another very straight - belt looks like its on a loo roll and bandy legs with knobbly knees. I think three children's done for me hmm

Jumpsuits. Would love to wear one.

I went to a conference and was given a style consultation by someone there. They told me I would suit jumpsuits as I am tall. But I still cannot think that I will look nice in them being that despite being tall I am also wide (16/18).

That and shorts. Again, too flabby.

NickECave not much at the moment but that's because I am 34 wks pg with twins! Somit's mainly loungewear at the moment.

For work, I wear dresses a lot. Whistles have been surprisingly good over the years. Need to have At least 3/4 length levees to balance the boobs. I wear a lot of opaques/ ballet pumps. Can get away with slightly flared skirts with fitted tops (round neck rather than v neck though). I wear a lot of scarves and chunky necklaces to hid/ distract from the enormous-boobs. Casuawear, i go for straight leg jeans mostly - they need to be v straight though - no hint of a flare/boot leg. Although my maternity Topshop skinnies have been v good so might try them out post babies. Fitted tops, plain, soft colours, with a little jersey jacket worn open with the sleeves pushed up ( I have two from Anthropologie). I wear Topshop, whistles, anthro, I liked kew while it was still going, oasis (although quality getting pretty shit), M&s limited collection has occasional gems, new look for little dresses to wear with biker boots or ballet flats or chunky ankle boots.

Stixswhichtwizzle Fri 04-Jan-13 17:40:30

Skinny jeans I'm too fat for them blush

cloutiedumpling Fri 04-Jan-13 17:59:31

Shift dresses. I am a short waisted pear shape and they never fit me, unless I try on a petite range, when they would be so short as to be indecent. I've always wanted to wear a nice grown up shift dress. I can't wear shirt dresses either. Skater or A line styles do suit me though as long as they are not too short because they have enough fabric for my huge pear shaped hips.

LifeofPo Fri 04-Jan-13 18:10:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

turkeyboots Fri 04-Jan-13 18:20:39

Shirts, especially patterned ones. In my head I'm all cute and hipster-ish, in fact I look like matronly bank teller.

Also skinny jeans, as look like an carrot.

CointreauVersial Fri 04-Jan-13 18:44:35

I can't wear anything tucked in or belted because I am straight up and down, with no waist.

Strapless looks dreadful, as I have those little rolls of fat which bulge under the arms (yuck).

Anything olive green or sludgy yellow/orange makes me look jaundiced.

Strappy/super-high shoes just make my feet hurt (my heels are getting lower and lower).

I'm another one who can't do hats. I don't have the right hair; I end up looking like a pinhead.

Also, at 45, I know that some looks are just too young for me to pull off nowadays. I tried on a shirt with a high, girly peter pan collar yesterday and it just looked ridiculous. Ditto skater skirts, teeny shorts or super-trendy stuff. I'm still a size 10, but knees, upper arms etc are a lot more....flabby than they once were, and best kept under wraps.

VerySmallSqueak Fri 04-Jan-13 18:56:30

High heels.
I walk with my bum stuck out and my chest thrust out and just look ridiculous.

Oh yes, and shorts! Playsuits- fine. Short skirts- fine ish. Shorts- for some reason absolutely, bloody awful confused

cocolepew Fri 04-Jan-13 19:26:55

High heels with a peep toe. The toe next to my big toe is too long. It sticks out the hole like a teeny penis.

coco grin

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