Does anyone else look young?

(75 Posts)
user1471888857 Thu 25-Aug-16 15:01:34

I'm 31 this year and look 19/20 no joke.
I hate it.
I get patronised and spoke down too all the time in shops/cafes etc.
I was in a shop and I was looking at a jumper and a very very snooty assistant said "oh dear I think that would be more suitable for you when you get a bit older"
Also I joined a counselling course and the course was ladies probably 25-45 and nobody let me speak.
A woman was 41 and everytime I spoke she rolled her eyes ..or butted in then had the cheek to say .."your young what do you know"
I'm so very annoyed with it.
I was in a taxi with a friend going to a pub and didn't have id and taxi man said .."you might get lucky tonight,door staff not on till late,you young girls today"
I'm 30 years old !!!!

singleandfabulous Thu 25-Aug-16 15:10:21

ha ha! No, sorry. I've always looked middle aged and stern even when in my teens. always the one sent in to get fags/alcohol when underage. I look 'youthful' now though but that's down to healthy living and a shed load of treatments.

melibu84 Thu 25-Aug-16 15:15:51

I have always looked a bit younger than I am (just turned 32), but not young enough to be patronised sad

I would just turn around and say "i'm 31" and watch their reaction, I bet they'd feel stupid smile

JaneJeffer Thu 25-Aug-16 15:17:33

I recommend you take up smoking and drinking hard liquor.

rollonthesummer Thu 25-Aug-16 15:18:22

I look younger than I am but no one has ever spoken to me like that. You do seem to attract incredibly rude comments!

BendydickCuminsnatch Thu 25-Aug-16 15:20:28

Yes it's fucking awful! Right now... Maybe I'll like it in the future...

But it's SO hard to make friends, I'm on the young side for mums in my area anyway (26, perfectly average on a national scale I think) but given I look young no-one wants to know me! Also I have really annoying post partum hairloss regrowth which is impossible to control and looks like baby hair so I do look like I did in my school days grin would love some clothes advice, I want a professional to dress me so I look older!

BendydickCuminsnatch Thu 25-Aug-16 15:22:49

Can't believe the comments you get. Luckily as no-one acknowledges me I don't get them (just (half) joking!)

FrustratedFrugal Thu 25-Aug-16 15:24:03

Yes. I'm 43 and got carded last year. People often assume that I am a student.

TronaldDump Thu 25-Aug-16 15:24:43

In mid-30s and apparently look mid-20s. It was more of an issue in my 20s when I did get comments (particularly in a work context) and felt people didn't take me seriously. I guess now I'm 2 kids -and serious sleep deprivation- further on it's more of a bonus but it can be really annoying, especially as people don't see it as an 'issue' and think you're stealth boasting! I guess we'll all be pleased with it in the end but I do feel your pain, I'm an adult and want to be treated as such!

LemonBreeland Thu 25-Aug-16 15:36:04

I used to look young. Then I had DC3 and aged 10 years overnight.

I think you just need to be more forceful with people. Especially the woman who was arsey with you.

Missgraeme Thu 25-Aug-16 15:39:01

Be thankful!!
I am 45 and 2 years ago took chef son then 20 to hospital after chopping his finger off. I had my baby ds with me. Male nurse asked if he did his fair share with the baby!! He was shocked to hear it was his brother not his son!! My ds was mortified tho!!

MyBreadIsEggy Thu 25-Aug-16 15:44:37

I'm 22....but I look about 15 blush
I get some really strange looks when I'm out and about with Dd and my huge, pregnant baby belly confused even more strange looks when I'm with DH. He's 26 and has had a rougher paper round than me. So we probably look like one of those couples made up of a 30-something bloke who had an obscenely young girlfriend hmm

MistyMeena Thu 25-Aug-16 15:49:09

I used to have this problem, was often asked (in my late 20s) if my parents were in when I answered my own front door!

I mod 40s now and doesn't seem to happen so much grin

I would just tell the rude ones how old you are with a very deadpan expression. Do you

MistyMeena Thu 25-Aug-16 15:49:59

Oops.... Do you have children? I found I aged considerably once they appeared...

HalfStar Thu 25-Aug-16 15:55:58

I look a bit younger I think
Sometimes get comments but not rude as such
I really don't mind it...

Just5minswithDacre Thu 25-Aug-16 16:01:27

It got better after 35.

Look seriously unamused; Ask them how old they think you are; Tell them how old you are; Only resume friendliness if they are suitably contrite.

Don't wait for them to reference your age, take your cue from the patronising nonsense.

Deadnettle Thu 25-Aug-16 16:05:46

I'm very nearly 32 and most people seem to think I'm a teenager. People don't take me seriously, ignore me, or patronise me. I hate it.

MissSueFlay Thu 25-Aug-16 16:08:40

Hairstyle can affect it - I look young for my age and once had a fringe cut in.... knocked another 10 years off right then and there! (started growing it out again straight away!) I'm early 40s now and get told I look early 30s which is nice, DD hasn't wrecked me completely! grin

When I was in my mid 30s (pre-DD) I was still getting asked in supermarkets if I was over 21 if I was buying alcohol, and once I was actually offered the children's meal option on a flight to Greece with my boyfriend, now DH - I was 25!!

For work I wear heels to add some height and straighten my posture - walking tall and confidently can help with others' perceptions. I have also been known to keep wearing the glasses I usually only wear when on the computer, just to add a bit of gravitas... The rude woman on your course sounds like a bully, she's probably like that with a lot of people. Perhaps do some soft-skills training to boost your confidence in handling people in that sort of situation.

Boozena Thu 25-Aug-16 16:11:09

I'm 26 and look young too. I don't think I look much different to when DH and I got together when I was 16. Like a PP he had a rougher paper round and has a massive beard so we get funny looks.
Once we were out walking in the sticks and a group passed us- I think they thought he'd kidnapped me.
I also went to the builders merchant with my dad a couple of months ago and they asked me if it was the school holidays blush

ShouldIdyemyhair Thu 25-Aug-16 16:15:49

Yes, look at my recent thread grin

I hate it, and I find people challenge me as if I must be mistaken when I tell them my real age. I had a woman in Aldi ID me for paractemol, joked that my ID must not be mine, and then gasped when I went over to type my car reg into the machine. I've also had people at the petrol station say 'that's right, that's all you have to do!' As if I'm filling up for the first time ever.

Now I just say 'ha ha ha I'll be loving it when I'm 50 and only look 30' and saunter off.

Helbelle75 Thu 25-Aug-16 16:16:01

I'm 41 and often told I look 30. I don't mind, it's very flattering. It does work again me at work though, i'm a teacher and started a new job last year. There was quite a lot of assumption that I was newly qualified, so had to have several conversations where I subtly stressed my 16 year's experience!
Sorry people are so rude to you op . They're probably envious of your youthful looks.

ShouldIdyemyhair Thu 25-Aug-16 16:17:04

Oh, and the most frequent one: someone knocking the door and asking if my mum or dad are in. This is my house!

FoolandFitz Thu 25-Aug-16 16:23:03

Yes, I've always looked young and it doesn't help that I am super short.. When I was 15, everyone used to think I was about 12. Not great for my self confidence then.

In my 20s and early 30s, I had to carry around my driving licence around to be let into pubs. The bouncers would laugh at me otherwise. I don't remember anyone else being rude or dismissive though.

Then when I was 40, I started teaching and had a baby. I looked older straight away grin

Most people say I look about 35ish now - I'm close to being 50.

So yes, it's a pain when you are young, but works to our advantage in the long run.

FloraFoxglove Thu 25-Aug-16 16:23:34

I see it a lot. People think they look young but they don't really. They look their age.

UntilTheCowsComeHome Thu 25-Aug-16 16:23:42

Like a pp, once I hit 35 I suddenly looked my age or thereabouts. I looked young until then.

Although when I took a taxi home recently the driver asked "you still live with your parents then?" When we pulled up at my 'naice' house. I suppose he thought a young woman couldn't possibly afford a detached, new build house hmm I can't, it's rented

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