"Summery and elegant" for a wedding.

[AYD2MITalkTalk]

Help!

My brother is getting married in a month, the dress code is as stated, and I have no idea where to start.

I have broad shoulders, large boobs that require a full cup bra, a fat belly thick waist, and no hips or arse. I'm flabbier than I'd like. I'm maybe a 16 to 18 on top, 12-14 bottom.

My current "style" is unfashionable jeans, a t-shirt, and a hoodie with trainers, every day and in every situation.

I don't wear makeup, ever, have no idea how to wear it or put it on, and don't really want to change that. Short hair. Can't show my arms, don't want to show my legs. Don't like skirts or dresses and would spend the whole time self-conscious if I wore these.

And it has to be something I can take with me on a plane.

I have no ideas. Do I need a hat? Do I need to learn to walk in high heels, in a month? Trousers and jacket, or something else? :(

I'm flailing here and would be really grateful for help/opinions/tellings-off.

[Gruach]

Unless there is a really solid reason why not - you will probably look your best for the least effort in a dress that perhaps flares from the waist to balance broad shoulders.

You'll need to find out from your DB what the hat wearing custom of the country is.

What's your budget? (Do you choose "unfashionable" jeans to be cussed or because you really can't afford anything new?)

[AYD2MITalkTalk]

A picture for context (I've put on some weight since then but don't have a more recent full-length photo).

[Gruach]

You look well within the parameters of perfectly normal appearance.

(Kindly meant ...)

[AYD2MITalkTalk]

It's Germany, so I don't think their cultural expectations are that different.

I find fashionable jeans uncomfortable - the lack of hips and bum means that men's jeans in a classic cut are more comfortable for me.

I can afford maybe £150. £200 probably. I don't have a massive income. Oh but then I need shoes, don't I?

I could probably cope with a dress, but I'd have to keep my arms covered.

It's an all-day/all-night event.

[AYD2MITalkTalk]

As I said, I've put on some weight since then (the photo is six months old). I do perhaps lack some confidence as I used to be about six stone heavier.

It's going to have to be a dress, isn't it? :(

[Gruach]

I'm having a look at Finery at the moment, but having seen your budget it should be easy to find something nice.

Are you tall enough for /would you prefer a jump suit? How formal are German weddings?

[Ilovetea82]

What about wide leg trousers with top/jacket, if you aren't comfortable at the idea of a dress.
Head to the make up counters in your local dept store and ask for make up advice they are actually a lot more helpful than they look. And maybe get a fascinator for your hair - sales on so lots in accessorise :) good luck.

[PedantPending]

I think I am the only person I know in Germany that wears a hat to weddings, so you can forget about the hat.
If it is a fairly typical German wedding there will be the ceremony, some kind of coffee and cakes or sparkling wine thing afterwards, followed by a more formal evening meal and (wait for it) proper dancing! The last one I attended, I wore a long, silk dress (with short sleeves) plus jacket/coat and hat for the service. Ditched the outer wear for the meal and dancing.
Having said all that, German weddings are generally much less formal, but from you photos you would look stunning in a maxi dress.

[Gruach]

What do you think? With some sort of light arm covering/summer coat?

[AYD2MITalkTalk]

Ooh, I hadn't heard of Finery. Some useful-looking stuff there, thank you.

Good to hear about the hat thing

There's the official ceremony, then wine and sandwiches, then the church ceremony, then afternoon tea, then a nice dinner, then dancing. Can I wear the same thing all day and hope I don't spill food in myself? I've never been to a wedding before

I'm only 5'5", so no to a jumpsuit, but a maxi dress would possibly do. Though wide-leg trousers also sound good. I'm really not sure about the makeup thing… I've never worn it before and I worry that I'd forget i was wearing it and smudge it horribly

Are silk dresses expensive?

[AYD2MITalkTalk]

That's okay Ruash - I like the color but it seems quite short? And doesn't go up to a size 18, obviously. I will have to practise shaving my legs anyway, though, if I wear any kind of dress. I'm tricky with dresses as I'm 44" on the bust and 39" on the hips.

[AYD2MITalkTalk]

Gruach, I mean! Sorry.

[AYD2MITalkTalk]

Finery don't do my size :(

Is this summery and elegant?

[Gruach]

Still looking!

A US size 14 would be a UK 18 iirc.

[AuditAngel]

I recently went to a wedding in Spain. I had a personal shopper appointment at Debenhams. I bought a maxi dress and a chiffon jacket, then sandals from M&S.

It was definitely worth it for me as I tried on things I wouldn't have tried, some worked and some didn't.

[Gruach]

This brand? Not necessarily this dress.

[AYD2MITalkTalk]

And I wondered about this but not sure if it's too casual.

[AYD2MITalkTalk]

I quite like that Marella one - I'll have a look round the website and see if they have anything suitable in my size.

I hadn't thought of a personal shopper - does it cost a lot?

[Gruach]

The first is pretty but may not be as nice on. Isn't the second a little ordinary for a wedding? A bit too everyday?

I'd look for either a striking cut or a luxury fabric - preferably both.

[Gruach]

And do remember that sizing will be more generous in more expensive brands. A Top Shop 18 could easily be an Alexander Wang 14.

[AYD2MITalkTalk]

Hmm. Striking cut or luxury fabric. That's probably a good place to start.

[AuditAngel]

My outfit, including dress, jacket, shoes, necklace and earrings was about £250, but I didn't give her a budget

[AuditAngel]

dress

[AYD2MITalkTalk]

Ouch. Though I suppose he'll only get married once (I hope). And I can keep the outfit.

[AYD2MITalkTalk]

That's really nice, Audit!