Should I just get a new hairstyle and ignore what people at work say..........

(67 Posts)
Leedsavril Tue 21-Jan-14 15:08:15

I am in my mid 40's and have had the same hairstyle for about 25 years! It is a typical below the shoulder style, its very thick, highlighted and with a few soft layers in it. For about a year now I have been mulling over having a change for a few reasons. I don't think it looks as bouncy or as healthy as it used to, I am fed up spending 30 minutes blowing it every morning after its daily wash and probably the main reason is that I would love a big change after all this time.
I like the look of stylish short hair and I saw a style that I really liked so I thought I would ask a few friends both family and at work what they thought.
Here are a couple of pics of me and what I'd like.
www.flickr.com/photos/115088476@N06/
I was just not prepared for some of the comments and strong opinions. My girlfriends were mainly supportive and offered advice, some feel I will regret it some say go for it....I can take that but the comments from some of the guys at work were just shocking. I got remarks like "You will look like your mum"......"Don't cut it as you will loose all your sex appeal"....."You'll look horrible with short hair"............."That's not fancyable" I am unsure if I find these comments rude, insulting or just honest but I can't believe that something as trivial as a new hairstyle has provoked such a strong reaction from the guys. I am now a bit unsure what to do, I feel I would like the new style but I want to be sure I am doing it because I want to, not because some guys at work have made comments that I do not like.
Has anyone else had this sort of experience.......what do you think?

oscarwilde Tue 21-Jan-14 16:01:46

I agree with Fruitsalad. Sorry sad
I also think that you look really like this actress and should consider going a lovely shiny brunette colour.

What about this , the pic of Cate Blanchett?

DuchessFanny Tue 21-Jan-14 16:02:44

I love the Michelle Williams ones - I had a similar cut but my hair is very dark .. Was so easy to do, felt sexy and feminine .. Am starting to wonder why I grew it out !!
Anyway back to you ! I really like it shorter and think it'll take years off you, but as pp have said, a bit longer in the fringe.

Dillydollydaydream Tue 21-Jan-14 16:08:16

If you've had the same hairstyle for about 25yrs give it a go, hair soon grows anyway if you don't like it but I'm sure you'll love it shorter.

the link doesnt work for me so I cant comment. I have recently had mine cut above my shoulders again and I like it and it takes less time to dry/style it

Fairylea Tue 21-Jan-14 16:20:18

I agree with fruit salad too I'm afraid... sorry!

I also think (dons flameproof suit) that unless you are late teens / early twenties very short hair just isn't sexy in the same way that longer hair is. It's fashionable and can be really striking and classic and all that but I have yet to meet a man who prefers short hair on a woman.

I have had my hair all different lengths from literally a few cm all over when I was 18-21 and then spiky and scruffy and then longer and short again blah blah. I am now 33 and have very long hair, just past my shoulders in waves. I do occasionally get a desire to cut it all off again but I really don't think I could pull it off anymore... I think it would take a lot of make up and wearing funky clothes to stop myself looking my age, whereas with longer hair I just look softer and I can get away with doing less as my overall look is very feminine.

I am rambling. Sorry.

I think your hair looks best in the second photo.

Bexicles Tue 21-Jan-14 16:36:54

I think you have lovely features and could carry off the shorter cut. Although the one time I had my hair cut short I felt awful! just not me? You may feel the same or it may be liberating to not have to style and condition long hair.

CockBollocks Tue 21-Jan-14 16:44:09

OP, what is your hair like? It looks quite like mine. Fine but loads of it.

If that's the case short hair like you have in the pictures actually takes ALOT of styling to look nice and also runs the risk of being 'fluffy'!!

Also have you considered your shape? I look ridiculous with very short hair as I am tall and not rake thin. so my head ends up looking tiny smile

If you like it, do it. It will grow back.

I know bobs are considered mumsy on mumsnet but I have mine like this bob just a little shorter. Very easy to look after with my Babyliss big hair!!

CockBollocks Tue 21-Jan-14 16:46:30

Forgot the front shot!! front

You're very attractive.

But you have 'soft' features and I think that short haircut only looks good on those who are very angular/gamine looking - Annie Lennox has very angular, striking features.

You would need to wear some fairly striking make up to go with it. If you wear the nice but gentle make up you're wearing you could look really middle aged.

We are about the same age with similar hair - if I cut my hairy short like that and didn't bother with make up I'd look er..... butch.

PrimalLass Tue 21-Jan-14 16:51:53

Why don't you try getting shorter in stages?

PrimalLass Tue 21-Jan-14 16:52:14

*getting it cut shorter in stages

JohnCusacksWife Tue 21-Jan-14 16:55:28

Personally I think the particular style you linked to looks very mummy and middle aged. But a short in the back, longer fringed version would look more youthful.

I've had my hair both long and short and like both but I do always feel a bit less sexy with short hair.

furlinedsheepskinjacket Tue 21-Jan-14 17:00:14

op I could have written yr post - I did post on here a few months ago about the same thing.i am your age and I went for it.you won't regret it.
I went for a sienna miller pixie crop - everyone pulled a face when I said what I wanted.i sat in the hairdressers chair and told her to take more off.......... smile. I love it - everyone loves it. it is sooooo easy but it needs trimming after only 8 weeks.
go for it.

furlinedsheepskinjacket Tue 21-Jan-14 17:01:33

oh do go for a longer heavier fringe though - I have mine swept to the side.

ContinentalKat Tue 21-Jan-14 17:02:49

I think you should go for it, but second the longer fringe. The exact cut you have linked to does look mumsy to me, sorry.

Brillenbar Tue 21-Jan-14 17:27:37

I had bobbed hair for ages, and took the plunge and had a pixie cut last year. Husband liked it. Women liked it. Men, however, did not, and I had some pretty offensive comments. I'm a lawyer FFS. But male colleagues seemed to think it was fine to make predictable remarks, particularly along the lines of quips about sexuality.

My children also didn't like it, and oddly, I found that more upsetting. For whatever reason, though (and I'm really not inviting psychoanalysis here), I just did not feel pretty, and that mattered to me. Some women look so pretty with pixie styles. I felt I didn't.

So I am now growing it. It is taking forever....

Thinking of doing the same thing myself. I went from long hair (mid back) length to a bob in October and now I find myself itching to go for a really short chop.

I figure it will always grow again!! Mine is somewhat over processed now I feel (46, so regular highlights as going grey) and I fancy chopping and then comtemplating seeing if it looks ok natural or not!

Go for itsmile

ITCouldBeWorse Tue 21-Jan-14 17:41:57

Tbh (I'm the same age as you) I think you could carry it off your jaw line looks really good, but I don't think it will flatter..

Def time for a change after 25 years, but I am seeking flattering all the way!

eurochick Tue 21-Jan-14 17:45:21

Hmmm. I think the short style you linked could be very ageing and "mumsy" on anyone over about 25. I think the sleeker style in your second picture is lovely. My terribly glamorous 50 yr old step MIL has something very similar and it always looks classy while being fairly low maintenance day to day.

BranchingOut Tue 21-Jan-14 17:49:44

Robin Wright in House of Cards?

hermionepotter Tue 21-Jan-14 17:51:25

I think bear in mind it may be harder to grow your hair back to its current length as easily/quickly in 40s? unless yours grows really quick - ie if you want long hair again if you don't like it, could take years. Also there's a risk of looking mumsy. But then again if you fancy a change and are brave then good for you. If it was me <coward> I'd go for a bit shorter/bit of an update maybe at a new salon etc and see how I feel about that first

FruitSaladIsNotPudding Tue 21-Jan-14 18:02:59

Change of colour could be an idea? Going darker will likely improve the condition too.

FoxyHarlow123 Tue 21-Jan-14 18:12:19

DO NOT cut your hair short. Especially not those 2 styles. You'll look 10 years older in an instant. Stay blonde but have a colour refresh. Have some long layers cut in and get a Babyliss big hair bush. Go all sleek, glossy and swishy. Stop ringing your eyes with black khol and you'll look a million dollars.

Leverette Tue 21-Jan-14 18:22:59

Yes you should ignore what men at work say. Your job is not to be a decorative bauble for them to get sexual pleasure from looking at!!

I think shorter would really suit you but with a long, side swept fringe like the current Charlize style. But whatever you do, do it for you!

Leviticus Tue 21-Jan-14 20:02:17

I think it's got huge potential to go mumsy - sorry.

There was a thread yesterday on here with the title 'who is this?' That I thought of as soon as I saw your (very lovely) photos. It's a link to a photo of Heidi Klum with a really nice below jaw bob. That would look great on you and be pretty easy to achieve.

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