I've had a grey streak in my dark brown hair for 20 years but the grey is spreading over my head now and I don't like it.
I've always resisted dyeing it before because I like the main colour of my hair and once you start how do you stop but my grey hair is not a nice look. My hair is almost shoulder length and frizzy and I can't/don't have time to spend time blowdrying or straightening so I usually scrunch it and leave it to dry naturally with curl creme, unfortunately this just makes the grey streak look like a scruffy piece of rope.
I am ageing in a scruffy and unkempt way, rather than gracefully and elegantly, and I need to do something about my looks to give my confidence a boost.
So anyway, I've made an appointment for a cut and colour on Saturday but now I'm having a wobble about the colour bit. I don't like the idea of an unnatural-looking colour and I hate the idea of roots showing after a few weeks. Will it be a huge mistake? Should I just get a good cut? I want an elegant, easy to look after, feminine style but don't think I could style it properly.
Please does anyone out there have a solution for me?
Your hairdresser will probably give you a great colour, dry it, shine it and straighten or bend it until it looks amazing.
You will go home wash it, dry it and attempt to style it in the same way and it won't happen. And within three weeks your grey streak will be back and very obvious to you.
Before you commit to dying ask your hairdresser to cut you in a low maintenance style - one that does not require loads of faff. Find a good product to reduce frizz (not Frizz Ease maybe an oil) try to leave it to dry naturally if possible and see if you can learn to live with your streak. It will save you a fortune because you won't be paying for colour all the time and you may come to like your natural silver threads.
Ask the hairdresser to recommend some products to help keep hair from frizziness and nice and smooth. e.g. Tigi BedHead Afterparty and Morroccan Hair Oil (Light, if hair is fine) to reduce frizz and to help keep it smooth. You could also buy something likethis and do yourhair for 5-10 mins , with the hair products, when you do want to make the effort.
Match the colour to the roots and ask them for the details of the colour they put in your hair so that you can top it up, using the right shade, at home in between professional colourings. The alternative is to embrace the grey and have the shade of grey you do want put through your hair, bizarre as that might sound. But going grey gracefully as a dark-haired brunette is tricky.
If after having you lovely new haircut you really can't tolerate your natural colour then look at dying it.
Grey hair does seem to behave differently to the rest of your hair so tame it half the battle is won. There are loads of people on here thinking about going grey and plenty that have done it so you won't be alone.
Don't dye it. It becomes an endless treadmill. The dyes always go too dark initially, they then oxidise after two weeks and by the third you have to have the roots done again. It costs a fortune and everyone can tell who has dyed hair and who doesn't. if you do it yourself you invariably get colour build up on the ends which then leads to root glow.
Once the grey comes in strong at the temples it can be quite resistant to colouring which then means you have to triple process the blighter. I have stopped dyeing my hair two months ago and have just buzzed in time for the school holidays. It is such a relief. The colour coming through is so much more flattering to my complexion and I think I looked older with the dyed helmet hair than all the lovely tones I have in it now.
So I second the advice of just getting a good cut and getting the products right.
I am in my late thirties and had dyed my hair for over twenty years. Do you know what- it is only now I feel happy with the colour I have got. Best wishes x
Well i have just gone into my account and ticked the bit where all mumnetters can view and then gone into my profile and clicked on what public can access and it clicks into my photos. Can you let me know what I have missed?
Practicality, you have great bone structure and eyes to carry off such short hair Must be great to not have all that faff too.
If you do dye your hair, then buy professional hair colourant (the one your hairdresser uses to get a proper tonal match) and 3% or 6% developer from the big traders on Ebay, and only apply to the roots, combing through the hair for the final 5 minutes. Erdicates much of the hair-dye-horror Practicality describes. You can buy the professional application brush, bowl, comb, gloves from online hair stockists. Again, talk it over with your hairdresser - mine knows I can't afford to have my hair coloured every 4-6 weeks and I prefer to pay for a good quality cut and only get my hair coloured if I'm going to tweak the shade.
Thank- you that is so kind. I am just of the view that everyone looks better with their natural hair colour after seeing my mum stopping with the beige lion and embracing her beautiful silver white hair. She looks so much younger with her natural hair.There is this myth around grey hair that it ages people. I think in the majority of cases (especially if you are cool toned) nothing flatters more than what grows naturally out of your own head.
I think a lot of women feel scared because of the unnatural contrast when it grows through but that is down to the dyed hair reflecting back on the silver. Until you get all the dye off you don't know what you have got.
With respect to triple processing- you have to bleach/prelighten the hair before putting on the perm dye. It is only that that would make the hair porous enough. I never got a natural result though. If I tried even an ash colour it wouldn't be cool enough because hey all have too much red in them to counter the hair turning green. As the dye washes out/fades this undertone becomes apparent.
I am happy to be free of it. I think for a lot of people they don't think about NOT dyeing it. It has almost become a knee jerk reaction to seeing grey that you have to dye it. You don't have to and you won't look 'old'.x
Thanks everyone for your thoughts. It is hard to go grey when the rest of the hair is so dark. I've been ok with just the stripe since I was in my early 20s but now it's starting to pepper all over my head I don't feel attractive. And the grey hairs don't curl like the rest, they just look messy and wiry.
Practicality, you really suit short hair. Sadly I don't have the features and, after being forced to have short hair as a child, I don't want to go that short again. But I do hate the idea of being stuck on a dyeing treadmill once I start.
I'm going to try a new style first and see how I feel about it. I have more time to spend on styling my hair in the mornings now that DS is old enough to take care of himself more so perhaps I can achieve a more groomed, elegant look without taking any drastic action.
I'm all for choice. I just wanted to put forward that grey is a choice too and women can look great with it especially for those who are prematurely grey and for whom it is getting more and more difficult to keep on top of it.
If you are as dissatisfied with it as I was with respect to the colour never turning out quite right and looking like you have bald spots after two weeks because the contrast is too great, it might well be worth exploring this option. Many women have no idea how fabulous their natural hair is - silvers and all.