Help with stupid emergency Wimbledon for a chubby pauper

(20 Posts)
DialsMavis Wed 26-Jun-13 08:19:37

So my twat boss has decided that staff have to dress in tennis gear at work whenever Andy Murray is playing. I've left it until the last minute as u thought it was some sort of grim joke, apparently it's not. If I was thin, young and gorgeous I would scour the charity shops for ironic tennis gear and look like an attractive yet amusingly ironic female tennis version of the 118 guys, unfortunately that isn't the case. I am broke and need it by tonight. I also work in an environment surrounded by pervy and mysoginist older men (pub) & am years older and dress sizes wider than the other women who work there, help!

I'm also completely skint. I was thinking wrist bands and a videos band thingy, sports direct?
And a white dress or skirt and £2 primark white tee, as long as I can wear the dress on holiday. Has anyone seen anything v cheap that I can grab today? I'd rather it wasn't too short, but I can always wear leggings if needed, but that would look pretty silly next to the acres of tanned young that will be on display from my colleagues.

I'm a 12-14 (more like a 14 at present), extremely fat legged 5ft7

Please help (apologies for length and hysteria of this post)

DialsMavis Wed 26-Jun-13 08:21:15

Videos = headband

aftermay Wed 26-Jun-13 08:50:30

Dress like a ball girl, head to toe in purple and crouch behind the bar smile

NoelHeadbands Wed 26-Jun-13 09:13:23

Or tell your boss to go fuck himself?

Or at least stump up cash for a new outfit

Meglet England Wed 26-Jun-13 09:18:30

Tell your boss to pay.

We had to do dress up days when I worked in Lush. I hated the faff and expense, I should have told them a blank "no".

gaggiagirl Wed 26-Jun-13 09:28:17

Sports direct have a good sale on for wrist/headbands I was just there on Saturday.
Primark for white tee/dress/skirt/leggings
please make sure you keep the receipts so you can present them to your twat boss!

gaggiagirl Wed 26-Jun-13 09:29:55

or get a tennis ball and thread it on a piece of string and wear it as a necklace? X

DialsMavis Wed 26-Jun-13 09:32:49

There is no way he will pay, they are idiots. But they are idiots who are feeding my DC until I get a graduate job. wink

gaggiagirl Wed 26-Jun-13 09:43:17

Set yourself a budget I would only spend a fiver. We are always having to do charity stuff in our office like wear a certain colour I hate it as I only ever wear black or navy if I'm feeling exotic ha ha.

Go dressed as an umpire? Navy blazer and midi length white skirt - or some female umpires wear white trousers.

* If you have those clothes already of course

I'm with the tell him to fuck off brigade. What is it with people and tucking fancy dress? Most people hate it, it's not fun it's a pain in the arse. I'd ignore it. They can't sack you for not dressing up!

VioletGoesVintage Wed 26-Jun-13 11:28:32

Agree with Gwendoline. The twat can't dismiss you for not joining in with this. And, if he does, you'd probably have a stonking unfair dismissal claim.

Failing that, just wear whatever you'd wear if you were playing tennis e.g. Trackie bottoms, a tee and trainers. After all, he didn't say you had to dress like a Wimbledon tennis player.

DialsMavis Wed 26-Jun-13 12:35:35

I know I should tell them to do one, but quite pathetically I want to have a nice Ish time while working and everyone else is really into the idea hmm.

Startail Wed 26-Jun-13 12:48:16

It was freezing for parts of the French open.
Several of the women played in long sleeves and cropped leggings

Matsikula Wed 26-Jun-13 22:14:56

Could you go as a 1930s tennis player? So white shirt, pearls and (the tricky bit) some sort of white skirt, which doesn't need to be short, white socks and plimsoles? Plus a white sweatband to ram the point home? But yes, if they want you to dress up and it is a customer -facing role, surely they ought to pay expenses.

SacreBlue Wed 26-Jun-13 22:20:37

Suit up and go umpire?

Dawndonna Wed 26-Jun-13 22:27:34

I think you need to view yourself a little differently. I am 5'5" and look pretty sylph like at a size 14 and damn skinny at a 12.

DialsMavis Wed 26-Jun-13 23:06:16

Ahhh thanks everyone. I just grabbed a nice t shirt dress from H&M which I will wear anyway and stuck my plimsolls on and my hair in plaits.

hollyisalovelyname Thu 27-Jun-13 09:29:37

At 5ft 7 ins and size 12/14 you are not chubby.

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