Late 40s, menopausal and fading

(1001 Posts)
Swedes2 Thu 21-Apr-11 13:27:47

I haven't as yet submitted to the full beard and elasticated waistband trousers. But heck, it's hard isn't it? I absolutely love clothes, make-up, and all that shit.... but I am becoming more and more interested in my garden (not a euph). Last night I went to the garage to buy milk in my gardening clothes.

Anyone else going through the same thing? Have you any tips you can share?

Ashbury Thu 21-Apr-11 15:17:33

I'm 43, and the best day out I've had in ages was at the garden centre! One of things I've loved as I've got older is not caring so much about my appearance. Having said that, it's always good to keep yer hand in (definitely not a euph.!). I over-hauled my make up bag recently - having decided that the make up routine needed up-dating (having had the same one since my twenties). I also got a few new products to try. I suppose it's about getting the balance right, and you're definitely not alone on this one.

Swedes2 Thu 21-Apr-11 16:25:31

Ashbury - Thanks. I'm glad it's not just me. I am always angling for excuses to disappear to proper garden centres. Good idea about the make-up overhaul. I think I'll start with that.

teahouse Thu 21-Apr-11 19:26:50

I'm 45 and still love clothes. I've never been into make-up and my hair is always untidy, but I have a huge collection of shoes and at least half the week, wear heels. I'm more concerned about my looks now than I ever have been but do intend to age gracefully.

I've been on HRT since I was 40, and refuse to fade.

chipstick10 Thu 21-Apr-11 19:47:04

I am constantly concerned about how awful i look. I wish i didnt care but i do. My hands give the game away, they are shocking. I would scare the neighbourhood children if i left the house without make up, and so my make up routine is more important now then it ever was in my yoof. I spend more now on clothes then i would ever have contemplated back in the day. And no grey hair is ever on show. I would love to just give in to my fate but it aint happening.

Pagwatch Thu 21-Apr-11 19:52:35

No. I am 49. I am losing my looks. Yep. Shit it is.
But I love clothes and fashion. I have had four people in the last week ask me where I got something I was wearing or compliment my clothes. I just had to change what I wear, how I wear it. It has become about feeling good, feeling stylish , rather than gorgeous,pretty, sexy blah blah blah.

If you want to embrace the garden nothing wrong with that. But if it is because you feel you have given up then don't.
Have fun how you want.
I hate the idea that our options contract as we age. I resist that.

Swedes2 Thu 21-Apr-11 21:02:46

I do love my garden, but I don't feel ready to become one of those ladies who disappears to her garden age 48, never to return, Sort of thing.

Teahouse - how much difference do you think the HRT makes? I've thought for a while I might need some hormones.

Chipstick - interesting about the make up and resistance to grey hair. I don't feel ready for grey hair either and spend quite a bit of money on my colourist.

Pagwatch - yes you've hit the nail on the head about the change from pretty/gorgeous etc to stylish. It's all such a change.

I'm determined not to become totally invisible: the old lady in the garden.

c0rns1lk Thu 21-Apr-11 21:06:35

I love my garden since turning 40 as well! Still love clothes and make up. Buy more carefully than I did in my youthful days when size 10 always fitted. How do you get HRT?

noddyholder Thu 21-Apr-11 21:07:27

Very difficult to accept that change esp when some of it happens literally overnight

c0rns1lk Thu 21-Apr-11 21:10:59

It does doesn't it Noddy? Quite bizarre

Pagwatch Thu 21-Apr-11 21:14:01

I have found that progesterone cream has made a huge difference to how I feel.
And I do get sad when I look in the mirror and see an old woman.
But it is better than the alternative.

Just been away and there were a lot of trophy wives where we were staying. I did ponder with dh the botox, breast implant, face lift, veneer, filler refurbishment. But had a nice supper and got a bit pissed and decided life ain't so bad a bit droopy grin

noddyholder Thu 21-Apr-11 21:14:14

What is it? I just don't get it. I went out to a concert with dp about 4 weeks ago and even if I say so myself I looked really nice but it feels like that was the last time and I just have looked terrible since Am going to give myself a fake tan later and an early night to try and give myself a boost.

c0rns1lk Thu 21-Apr-11 21:14:53

what's progesterone cream?

Pagwatch Thu 21-Apr-11 21:15:06

Yy to overnight subsidence being hard to take.

chipstick10 Thu 21-Apr-11 21:15:59

Had an induced menopause at the age of 37. Was put on hrt straight away and remained on it until 2 yrs ago when i had to come off it as it was causing my endemetriosis to grow again. I miss it in a way but not as much as i thought i would iykwim.

teahouse Thu 21-Apr-11 21:16:51

HRT - I love it. My menopause started when I was 39.5 and it took about 6 months for the GP to diagnose me properly because I was so young. I had 3 youngish kids so not being able to sleep at night, look after my kids (I'm a single mum), and do a very demanding full-time job was insane.

The GP told me all the risks of HRT but the advantages for me outweight the risks; no worry about oesteoporosis (good for me as I'm lactose in tolerant), no hot flushes, a good night's sleep, decreased risk of cervical cancer (although increased risk for breast cancer), and no loss of energy.

It's not for everyone I know and I do realise their are herbal alternatives, but I wouldn't be without it, and sailed through my 5 year check up - will take a lot to make me give them up.

c0rns1lk Thu 21-Apr-11 21:17:52

so I just ask GP? How can you prove you're menopausal though?

Pagwatch Thu 21-Apr-11 21:19:02

It is advertised on here sometimes. Natural progesterone cream by serenity.
It was suggested by my gp mate as my mum and sister had hideous menopause issues and hrt etc made them sister with oestrogen dominant breast cancer. I wanted something less ...medical.
Anyway. I read up on it and it made sense to try it and it helps me enormously. As does drinking less

pinkytheshrinky Thu 21-Apr-11 21:19:20

I am 41 and a small baby but really the lady in the mirror is an oldie - I do make a massive effort to dress up and wear make up most days and high heels - I am resisting the garden. Tell more about progesterone cream please......

Pagwatch Thu 21-Apr-11 21:43:21

If you google progesterone cream, especially the wellsprings site, there is quite a lot if info about balancing hormones etc.
I can't link very easily via iPad as I am a twit.
But if you read and are interested then you can chat with your gp (as I did) and see if it is worth trying. It works for me and I feel more comfortable using it be use of family cancer, and especially breast cancer, history

Swedes2 Thu 21-Apr-11 21:45:24

I think I'm going to make an appointment with that Studd guy. at least he knows what he's doing and will get me dosed up with the right shit. grin

Do I need my GP to refer me? Or can I just make an appt?

Swedes2 Thu 21-Apr-11 21:46:25

Pag - I'm confused because I thought it was Oestrogen I needed, not progesterone? <<useless>>

noddyholder Thu 21-Apr-11 21:46:51

Where do you put the cream?

Pagwatch Thu 21-Apr-11 21:57:25

grin on your arse noddy.

I would have to read all the stuff again but (from memory) the progesterone helps the body balance and manage the depleting oestrogen. Hrt etc seek to top up oestrogen without dealing with progesterone levels. Which is fine for some. But if oestrogen is potentially already a problem it can make matters worse.
It is a low level so I may need to look at it again further down the line but currently it suits me.

I think that is right. But I will have to dig it out and re read -as I am a bear of small brain--

noddyholder Thu 21-Apr-11 21:58:13

grin It couldn't do it any harm!

Swedes2 Thu 21-Apr-11 21:59:13

LOL @ 'on your arse' I was going to say you rub it into your testicles. grin

pointydog Thu 21-Apr-11 22:01:15

I have started to wear very high heels. It's working for me.

pointydog Thu 21-Apr-11 22:05:54

And I blew some cash on foundation, eye shadow and lipstick. Especially the foundation.

And I got a Big Hair.

saggarmakersbottomknocker Thu 21-Apr-11 22:07:35

<settles in with menopausal MNers>

I'm struggling with weight gain and frankly I'm pretty pissed off about it. (and my language is getting worse). I don't look so bad but having always carried any excess weight on my bum, I'm disliking this spare tyre.

I'm 47.

Pointy - do you not have bunions <peers at feet>

watfordmummy Thu 21-Apr-11 22:07:54

I'm 44 (fighting off 45!) and since hyster at 40 have been on HRT for 18 months now. Agree have to dress more carefully now, and am developing a rounded look to self. Think I need to up HRT so may look at prog cream see if that helps. I always thought 44/45 was old!! confused

pointydog Thu 21-Apr-11 22:10:27

No, no bunions. Maybe because I've been pretty darned comfy with my footwear most my life.

And if I get them now, well, I'm really past caring.

Signing in. Tried the Big Hair but looked like my Grandma. Now I just look in the mirror and think my mum has walked into the room. How does it happen and seemingly so fast?!

There was a thread not long ago about expensive foundation - £97. I use Chanel circa £40 but did think ....mmmm ..... I wonder? Or am I just living in hope.

pointydog Thu 21-Apr-11 22:12:46

I put on weight all around my middle, from the top of my ribcage to the top of my pelvis. It fucks me off. I'm constantly trying to keep some semblance of shape. So that I don't look all weebly.

Actually (clinging onto hope) my feet are good(ish) def no bunions.

pointydog Thu 21-Apr-11 22:14:08

Ah. even my pricey foundation isn't that pricey.

I think the trick is to have treated your appearance in an off-hand manner for decades so that you feel like you're really spoiling yourself when you're a bit of a hag.

saggarmakersbottomknocker Thu 21-Apr-11 22:15:50

Yes pointy, weebly - that's a good description. I'm currently sitting here feeling like I could rest my cocoa on the roll of fat under my bra. It's doing my head in.

I don't have bunions either. I'm the epitome of the comfy shoe.

Ohh ouch at 'bit of a hag'. So true though think I am shoring things up a lot bit and looking for more scaffolding. All the time.

saggarmakersbottomknocker Thu 21-Apr-11 22:17:54

Hmm - I haven't much cared about my appearance over the years; I'm scrubbed up but not groomed IYKWIM. Now I have the time to care it's all gone pete tong.

noddyholder Thu 21-Apr-11 22:20:59

shifting weight definitely becomes a TASK

saggarmakersbottomknocker Thu 21-Apr-11 22:26:08

I don't know if I can do much more noddy. In the last 6 days I've runx2, done 80mins in the gym, cycled 12 miles and hillwalked 8 miles incorporating 2 decent ascents. <lies down>

And I've only imbibed 2 units of booze.

Pagwatch Thu 21-Apr-11 22:26:50

first time dh caught me using the cream he was curious.

" I have to rub this into my arse or thighs" I said.

<<long pause>>

" you're going to need a bigger pot"

I use chanel too singing.
Tbh if you can afford £90 cream I would recommend eyelash extensions instead.
I don't really know why I tried them but theta are bloody amazing. We lose eyelash and they break and shorten as we age. The extensions make your eyes regain some of the dominance and proper proportion in your face iyswim. I was really impressed. Getting them done again soon I think

pointydog Thu 21-Apr-11 22:28:07

I might go blonde soon.

pointydog Thu 21-Apr-11 22:28:25

And I need to lose another 6lb.

noddyholder Thu 21-Apr-11 22:28:26

God that sounds great I walk 2 laps of the local park and want a medal! I am having a month of no wine and v healthy diet as have been going out masses and feel very round and even though this week not too bad I still feel fat! My botox has worn off too and I think that has pissed me off aswell grin

Pagwatch Thu 21-Apr-11 22:28:52

Actually I think the fact that I have always had an odd body helps. I am good at hiding stuff. I am a one woman triney and Susanna. But nice.

noddyholder Thu 21-Apr-11 22:29:28

I have those pag can't recommend enough apart from when tehy fall out randomly and you see your own lashes and the disappointment is tangible

pointydog Thu 21-Apr-11 22:30:45

I always liked trinny and susannah. Always nice ladies, I thought

Pagwatch Thu 21-Apr-11 22:34:57

There were nice except for filming women in their knickers in a room made of mirrors, which makes me want to cry just at the thought.

Did you get the urge to pull sometimes Noddy. or is that just me?

Are you going to do the botox again. You liked it didn't you.

<worries that iPad keeps auticorrecting botox to bottom or bootie>>

KristinaM Thu 21-Apr-11 22:36:29

pagwatch - AND you are old enough to remember Paddington

my DH likes to quote him as well. they are both the same age smile

noddyholder Thu 21-Apr-11 22:36:40

Yes am going back can't resist Strangely looking better makes me look after myself better in general so eat less etc left to my own devices I would be like waynetta

noddyholder Thu 21-Apr-11 22:37:21

I have been pulling this last set as they are not as good as the 1st ones and keep poking me in teh eye OUCH!

I tried those eyelash extensions and really couldn't cope with the faff of having them re-done so often. But I have been using the lash growing stuff that you paint on and it works for me so am happy with that and mascara. Am off for facial on Saturday which I seem to need more regularly now.

Just seems that you reach a point when you are 'good for your age' rather than just looking good. That is a bit of a pita. Oh well.

pointydog Thu 21-Apr-11 22:39:56

Looking at yourself in a ciricle of mirrors is small minnows these days.

Gok has Serious Conversations with women about clothes while they are in their bras and nicks trying to look normal. At least trinny's wimmin got to stare in mirrors and just groan about the view.

WMDinthekitchen Thu 21-Apr-11 22:41:47

Ah, all you bright young things!! Am 59 and take quite a lot of trouble with my appearance - very seldom without make-up, wear heels to work etc. Fortunate that I look younger or so people say. Eat Nutella healthily and exercise - hard to keep the weight off since I gave up smoking but hanging in there. Slap on the moisturiser, clean off the make-up at bedtime, can't help keeping up with the music with DD (16) around. Don't sweat the small stuff. Cleaning and domesticity get fitted in with work and hobbies, not the other way round. Trying to grow old disgracefully. Trying to be positive AMAP and having a laugh whenever I can. Life is not a rehearsal.

noddyholder Thu 21-Apr-11 22:54:15

I do agree WMD it just all seems like hard work at times and I have never had to work at it. Find low carb diet works for me but have been woefully bad lately and am really feeling it. Oh well off to bed I look ok in the dark grin!

WhatsWrongWithYou Thu 21-Apr-11 23:09:11

Good post. 48 next month here and going down fighting. My gardening years took place in my 20s as I moved in with DH who had a garden whereas I'd grown up without one so it felt like a huge privilege and pleasure. Soon got over that. Now I get enthusiastic and buy a couple of new plants a year and leave them under a bench until they shrivel.

I've never felt confident about my looks and always had a tendency to hide myself away - nice, fashionable clothes were for other women and my main aim was to disguise my boobs.

Don't care any more. I've deliberately learned how to dress to fatter my shape and will walk into any shop (apart from the achingly expensive - still like a bit of a bargain) without batting an eyelid.

I don't mind the ageing so much as I never felt pretty before, but I don't like the dragging down effect at the lower half of my face, nor the fact my eyes seem to be sinking into my head.

I too have a spare tyre, having been an hourglass who used to gain weight 'in the right places.' Have recently given up sugar in all its evil forms (apart from a couple of glasses of wine at weekends), and lost 4lbs - more quickly than I ever managed on SW.

Must try the progesterone cream again - dropped the last pot so only got to use it a few times.
<<starts rambling>>
<<ends post>>

saggarmakersbottomknocker Fri 22-Apr-11 07:58:19

Yes - good post WMD.

I think there's a point where you have to give up trying to look like an 'older' young woman and go for looking like a young 'older' woman.

I'm not really bemoaning getting older - I'm a lot more relaxed these days and generally enjoying life - just a shame I'm having to hump this spare tyre around with me. grin

Is this cream worth the price tag? (bearing in mind my current face cream is from Aldi)

noddyholder Fri 22-Apr-11 08:09:29

I am not ready to give in just yet. I am 46 in November and think I will shout and scream til I am 50 and then forget it. It does feel like hard work ATM off tom walk round the park for an hour am thnking of digging out my old plates DVD when I get back!

saggarmakersbottomknocker Fri 22-Apr-11 08:17:14

There's a Zumba class at my gym starting next week noddy. I'm wondering if I should go and strut my stuff amongst the 20somethings.

noddyholder Fri 22-Apr-11 08:24:31

Yes do!

WynkenBlynkenandNod Fri 22-Apr-11 08:39:31

Ooooo, I need this thread. Am 41 and in the middle of losing a huge amount of weight that I should have lost a decade ago. So now face being relatively thin by Christmas for the first time in about 20 years but obviously everything will be different in 40's compare to 20's, will need a whole new wardrobe and have to work out how to dress as a thinner than this time last year 40 something .Have lost 55lbs but still have 47lbs to go. Taken up swimming, walk a fair bit and have been gardening a lot so feel much better but White hairs are coming through at alarming pace.

Was chatting to a guy who turned out to be a personal trainer in the pool recently and am going to have a few sessions with him as feel I need some kind of exercise routine to keep me going the next few years and hoping he can sort out my bingo wings and post section stomach, doubt he's a miracle worker though.

Also am about to get a National Trust allotment so I've completely had it now haven't I, gardening and the NT in one go, there is no hope left.

mittenkitten007 Fri 22-Apr-11 10:59:24

Oh, me too -- this thread is making me feel normal. Almost 45, think my skin is starting to go papery, grey hair a-go-go, suddenly putting on weight on my thighs and bum where I never used to put on weight . . . . It is awful how it happens overnight. I am sure it's hormones and have recently been seriously considering HRT. Also bought some progesterone cream but was under teh impression I am only supposed to use it for last 14 days of cycle? Is that true?

Like WhatsWrong, I have recently tried to give up sugar completely and that (or something) has helped me shift 2 - 3 lbs.

Singing, what eyelash stuff do you use and where do you buy it?

Have been gardening since my 20s so that's nothing new!

Watching this thread with interest too. I'm 46 and find it hard to find the time and /or energy for all the maintenance seemingly required. Unlike 20's when no mainenance required and hours of time available! I don't want to sink into 'invisible old lady' as a couple of friends seem to have done! (I do love them though, nothing wrong with that, it's just not for me). I have to say I look to my mother for inspiration these days - she's always dressed well as long as I remember, but not OTT, helped by maintaining a healthy weight. I think being the right/healthy weight for you is the key, gives much more confidence.

Watching for more tips. Intrigued by the eyelash extension recommendations...

noddyholder Fri 22-Apr-11 12:51:08

cornsilk I think that is what I am struggling with The sheer effort!

I can feel my back and knees if I do anything more than a 1/2 hour walk or cycle ride. Is that normal? If I overdo the exercise one day I'll really feel it the next - I know I sound old now!! Little and often suits me better at the moment but I don't know if I should be resigned to that (and accept being 'old'!) because exercise does make you feel so much better. Used to be a lot more active in my younger days.

Off for a spot of gardening.

bibbitybobbityhat Fri 22-Apr-11 13:09:44

The weight around the middle thing is an absolute bummer and I speak as someone who has never been thin or even slim. But its so hard to hide.

Suddenly it becomes obvious why old people clothes have elasticated waists.

YusMilady Fri 22-Apr-11 13:33:34

45 going on 46. I'm embracing the rapidly greying hair now that I've finally found a stylist who can cut properly - I have maintenance cuts of a style that suits me every 6 weeks and the grey is getting more prominent but in a good way, not in a mad old bag way. Clothes - buy less, buy better. But the key thing for me is cycling, which I discovered late (about 4 years ago) and am now completely addicted to. I've got legs like Cyd Charisse, honest. Face like Frankie Howerd but one can't have it all.

noddyholder Fri 22-Apr-11 13:35:30

I am the same age as you 45 and will be 46 in November. I find the general overall squidginess which has crept up very disconcerting

BinEnd Fri 22-Apr-11 13:36:54

I'm 48 and on the other side of the menopause. I think I have worked my way through most of the feelings posters have on this thread but, at the moment, I honestly feel that I look better than I did 10 years ago - not younger - but better !!

I always had dreadful hormonal acne and the menopause has sorted that out.
I wore too much make up to try and cover the spots - now I wear much less which is more flattering.

I buy better quality clothes - just less of them.

I have my hair professionally coloured instead of the awful home jobs I used to attempt.

Yes I have more wrinkles and more weight around the middle but getting old is largely in the mind. We might not turn as many heads as the younger ladies but there is no need to blend into the background. Get bright accessories, go eccentric, go a bit loopy !! Anything so you don't become invisible smile

YusMilady Fri 22-Apr-11 13:39:26

Hmmm, well I was squidgy (to say the least) in my 30s and then lost a load of weight (5 stone) at 39, so being slim and exercising is still quite new to me. The older I get the harder I want to work at physical stuff - my biggest fear is that my knees or something will give out. I smoked like an idiot for decades too, so I'm making up for lost time. I guess the middle aged spread is just biding its time but I'm damned if I'm going down without a fight.

cyb Fri 22-Apr-11 13:44:35

Hi I'm Cybil and ...I'm peri menopausal

My skin had dried up like a prune although my is still greasy

My face looks like the last potato in the sack

My girth has widened considerable in the last year

My grey hair is like Japanese Fucking Knotweed

So a garden centre is where I actually feel like quite the fox these days

Oh God...I'm garden centre totty

pointydog Fri 22-Apr-11 13:46:18

All you need is gritty determination and cash to spend. And old birds tend to have a bit of both.

pointydog Fri 22-Apr-11 13:46:46

I'm sure a topic was set up a few years back about peri menopausal

YusMilady Fri 22-Apr-11 13:50:06

garden centre totty. Oh yes.

rubyrubyruby Fri 22-Apr-11 13:57:16

I am nearly 48

I hate gardening!

........ any suggestions greatly appreciated.

WhatsWrongWithYou Fri 22-Apr-11 14:03:21

You know, the adage about buying better quality clothes is all very well but the key is knowing what suits you. I'd happily buy from new Look (not that often but still), because I can recognise things that will flatter my shape.

I'd rather wear a Zara skirt that flatters me than a Vivienne Westwood that makes my arse look like a sack of old spanners not difficult to achieve these days.

rubyrubyruby Fri 22-Apr-11 14:05:44

.... and how do I know I'm menopausal FFS! hmm

I have a coil so no periods for 9 years now anyway.

cyb Fri 22-Apr-11 14:08:53

My weird periods have been the last sign tbh ruby

the sun spots on my cheeks, the dried up feeling, the MASSIVE mood swings, libido up and down like a fiddlers elbow...ah its a smashing time of life

fedupandfifty Fri 22-Apr-11 14:24:35

I almost went through an elasticated waist phase last summer. It's quite hard to resist isn't it? Good on you for getting compliments, though! Have you considered getting yourself botoxed?? Or some facial toning? I have done all of these, and I have just bought myself a Slendertone face (still in box). I am going through the menopause too, and my doctor refuses me treatment, so I've started taking Menopace from the chemist, which seems to be working. Sometimes I feel like crap for no reason, though - really tired and dragged down. Getting tarted up is such an effort when everything is heading downwards, isn't it?

noddyholder Fri 22-Apr-11 14:35:20

I am not menopausal yet still all regular in that dept just hating how I am disintegrating physically! What is peri is that the run up before the main feature grin

KristinaM Fri 22-Apr-11 14:35:29

I've just turned 49 and I'm not knowingly menopausal. Though having read this thread I'm wondering if I'm in denial

I'm still having regular periods and the only thing I've noticed is my hair is a bit drier. I can't see any grey as I get my highlights done every 6 weeks.

I have struggled to lose the flab around my middle since stopped bf 18 months ago, but I have been blaming the last baby and my under active thyroid.

How do you know if you are menopusal?should I be takig creams or pills?

I can't do the garden test as I've loved gardening since I was 30

noddyholder Fri 22-Apr-11 14:37:55

As for gardening every garden I get I deck or pave over it rather than maintain it a bit like my face! hate hate hate gardening but love a nice one. Agree totally about the libido either can't be arsed or gagging for it shock My dp doesn't know what is going on

KristinaM Fri 22-Apr-11 14:48:24

And I have a question about the fewer better quality clothes thing

If I'm only to buy one pair of trousers, it will need to be black or some boring colour and a v conservative style. Because they will need to last more than one season if they are £££££. So I will look middle aged and boring in my black wool posh slacks that cost , say £120

How will that make me look younger than 4 pairs of chinos /coloured /jeans from gap /uniqlo/zara that cost £25-30 each

And what's the point of paying £££££ for things that will be one season wonders, like palazzo pants or platform wedges?

Don't you just edn up wearing them next summer even though they are so last year because they cost a packet?

Or am I missing something......

FattyAcid Fri 22-Apr-11 14:50:24

Hmmm - I have just sent off for the Serenity cream - thanks for the tip, Pag

What symptoms does it help you with?

wendihouse22 Fri 22-Apr-11 14:58:05

I slept "funny" last night. Woke up this morning and saw that I had a crease running from the top of my left eyebrow, down the side of my face and around my jaw line. It's now nearly 3pm and I can still see it, albeit faintly. I looked like Lindow Man......

It is hard. Then again, I look after my skin, do a little exercise, and try (life permittng) to keep a happy disposition. That's the key, I think. Some days I feel (and look) great, others I look......well, just tired and need a good deal of help from my trusty makeup bag. And the days are gone where I could get away with moisturiser, blush and a lick of mascara. I don't trowel it on but, I do NEED it now!!

wendihouse22 Fri 22-Apr-11 15:01:02

Oh and KristinaM, can I move into your kitchen? Beautiful!

BinEnd Fri 22-Apr-11 15:03:07

KristinaM Its all relative - but probably my fault for not putting what my starting point was. Better quality to me meant Zara/Gap rather than market stall. I've never been one for paying hundreds of pounds for clothes.

I used to buy lots and lots of tat in not very nice material which would fall apart after one wash or not fit properly. I now buy a few classics and pad out with more reasonably priced throwaway fashion.

I have also discovered Style & Beauty which has helped enormously smile

KristinaM Fri 22-Apr-11 15:18:49

Bin end-y'see it's the word " classic" that makes my heart sink. It just says frumpy to me. I don't want to dress my age. I know I'm not 25 but looking like a 35-40 year old would be just fine. Unless that means the boden look [shudder]

Thanks wendi grin

noddyholder Fri 22-Apr-11 15:33:29

I shudder at classic too. It makes me think of old aunties. I do think decent jeans and basics which fit well are a godsend though and then add cheap frivolous stuff.

cabbageroses Fri 22-Apr-11 15:44:36

IMO you can either give in or fight it.

I am 56 and am told Il ook much younger. Might be down to HRT ( 2 years ago due to poor sleep)but make a big effort to e at really healthily, take lots of exercise and adapt fashion to my age.recently lost 5lbs that had crept on round my middle- doesn't sound a lot but am a tiny 5'3".

You can still do fashion but keep it subtle- currently today I am wearing dark rinse skinny jeans from Uniqlo, long sleeved T white Stuff and Coverse plimsols.

Step away from the 'classic' clothes. I'm happy to spend £40, £50 max on some trousers for example, just not £20. I agree it's just too depressing for words having to wear expensive clothes from a couple of years earlier because they were too expensive to get rid of. Yes, S&B thread helps so much more than buying fashion mags.

cabbageroses Fri 22-Apr-11 15:45:59

fedupandfifty why is your dr refusing you treatment- that's unacceptable.

BinEnd Fri 22-Apr-11 15:54:45

grin okay, okay, maybe classics is the wrong word. I know what I mean but I'm just not getting it across very well. For what its worth I don't look like an old auntie. I am also wearing jeans today with a nice cotton top. However, for work I have to wear quite formal stuff so I do buy decent quality jackets/suits that last more than one year whatever the word might be (definitely not classics though!)

cyb Fri 22-Apr-11 17:00:59

My period is either non existent (hence me peeing on a pregnancy test last month) , or I bleed like a stuck pig EVERYWHERE, or its the last scrapings form the Bovril jar

I never know if I'm coming or going

I'd like to get the whole lot whipped out, tummy tuck and eye lift in one

fedupandfifty Fri 22-Apr-11 17:11:26

cabbage - my doctor refuses to treat me because of links to breast cancer. I'm not sure if this is true or not. He tried to warn me off the over-the-counter treatments as well, for the same reason. He refuses to treat his own wife as well, on the same grounds!! Charming!

minieggfan Fri 22-Apr-11 17:28:52

I have been unable to sleep properly ever since the menopause started (I am 52). I went to the drs practically crying from lack of sleep. She refused to give me HRT (too dangerous apparently), suggested I sleep in the day (I work full time!), and then begrudgingly gave me sleeping tablets.

saggarmakersbottomknocker Fri 22-Apr-11 18:01:06

Oh thankfully I don't suffer with poor sleep. It's the getting up I have an issue with. And yes I have that long-lasting face crease thing too. Shocking.

It's quite heartening to meet folk who are refusing to go down with the ship!

WhatsWrongWithYou Fri 22-Apr-11 18:02:43

I was getting to the 'crying through lack of sleep' stage a few months ago. Pinging wide awake and not able to drop off again for hours.
I found (brace yourself) giving up wine in the week made a difference - made me less wired somehow. Just a suggestion smile.

mittenkitten007 Fri 22-Apr-11 19:38:01

Night sweats ahoy. And yes the word "classics" brings to mind . . . the early nineties, pleated chinos and chambray shirts (shudder).

But . . . WTF am I going to do about my sausage thighs? Eight months ago I was rocking skinny jeans (deluded emoticon). Now they still fit everywhere but on the thighs. If I put them on I have to walk like a paper doll. Has anyone else gained weight on her thighs NOT her tum -- or am I the only one on here with this issue?

LadyCornyOfSilk Fri 22-Apr-11 19:40:39

I've gained aroond the middle and am working harder than ever to shift it. <shakes fist at mother nature>

chipstick10 Fri 22-Apr-11 19:42:25

I tried a whistles dress on today. Omg omg omg, i couldnt beleive it was me staring back in the mirror. It was the most horrific sight.[shocked]. I am much much much fatter then i ever thought i was. I looked totally dreadful. My legs are shocking and i had a bruise on the back of my thigh that i dont know how i got. I am going to have to starve myself.

noddyholder Fri 22-Apr-11 19:43:48

I am becoming middley too and have started back on the low carb today as it is my only saviour but I feel it may not work this time. I don't ant to be a barrel

teahouse Fri 22-Apr-11 19:46:41

I have put weight on, on my thighs and on my tummy (hate that so much). I also seem to have developed stress incontinence, and huge bags under my eyes that just won't go. I hate to think how bad I'd be if I wasn't on HRT.

Wyken - 41! 40 flaming 1! I remember getting away with tinted moisturiser in the morning then. Congratulations on the weight loss btw that is great.

Mittenkitten - I've been using RapidLash you can buy it from Boots or most places I think. Strangely enough I was just using it on a fairly ad-hoc basis but suddenly I had eyelashes! The sort that people notice (my mum thought I'd had extensions again).

Think it's what most of us (over 45s say) it's the sheer time it takes to look good/reasonable enough not to scare the sheep now.

mittenkitten007 Fri 22-Apr-11 19:57:26

Thanks Singing! Oooh, exciting! Hope the Boots near here has it!

Yes, I am afraid that if I stop doing everything I'm doing people will hiss and make the sign of the cross when I pass them in the street.

LadyCornyOfSilk Fri 22-Apr-11 19:58:19

I've started running (for the first time) which seems to be making a leetle bit of difference.

minieggfan Fri 22-Apr-11 21:57:22

WhatsWrongWithYou - I suspected that giving up wine might be the answer! Seems particularly cruel when feel I need the wine with dinner more than ever as comfort for: hot flushes, jowls, weeble person thing going on mid-section and crazy mood swings.
Water just doesn't cut it somehow!

LadyCornyOfSilk Fri 22-Apr-11 22:09:52

yes I sleep better when I've not been drinking. Most annoying.

rubyrubyruby Fri 22-Apr-11 22:44:02

I definitely sleep better if I don't drink wine and I avoid tea after 4pm too.

I get night sweats and palpitations.

Silk pillowcase means I wake a bit less crumpled and sleeping in a supportive top has helped smooth my decolletage.

Swedes2 Fri 22-Apr-11 23:10:29

Oooh I love you all. How lovely to find so many of you all on here.

It's the lean ribcage just beneath your bust that disappears suddenly and depressingly one morning. The thickened torso is just so incredibly sexless and blokey. It's this bit that I hate the most I think. Having a tummy isn't so bad so long as you have a waist and a ribcage -- a shape.

Oh and my eyebrows have all but stopped growing but I get the odd hair that creeps out of my face and it can be alarmingly long before I notice. It feels such a trick.

My night sweats are awful at the moment, I find drinking a lot (r r a lot) of water throughout the day helps a lot.

minieggfan Fri 22-Apr-11 23:16:30

So if we can't drink wine what can we frickin' drink?

Maybe I can substitute the sleeping tablets for wine and just sleep through all the hideousness.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 00:25:14

yes - the fat ribcage - the bane of the middle aged lady. I will not succumb...

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 00:25:43

minieggfan - drink the wine....just hide the creme eggs

CointreauVersial Sat 23-Apr-11 00:30:30

Ohhhh, I've found my spiritual home thread...

44 here, and it's been a strange year. I had a dawning realisation last spring that I was getting that middle-aged "thick-set" midriff, so I embarked on a running programme and gave up carbs.....all well and good; I now weigh less that I have done in years.

But what's this? Periods have started going haywire, libido has hit the floor, I can only conclude that I have a new battle to fight, which may need more than a plateful of cauliflower rice and a new pair of trainers.

I don't feel 44, that's the problem. I still feel like I'm in my twenties, until I look in the mirror and see a face like a bag of old frogs. OK, a nice size 10 figure, but I'm too old to use it! Losing the weight and getting fit has been a good thing, but I can't think for the life of me why I left it so bloomin' long.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 00:32:01

cointreau you are my virtual twin

Swedes2 Sat 23-Apr-11 00:43:04

I have two teenagers (as well as two littlies) and at parents' evenings I note that there are the colourless mothers who've succumbed and mothers who gleam still. Do you know I think even a bit of lipgloss makes a big difference.

When women give up, they give up in a pretty wholesale way.

CointreauVersial Sat 23-Apr-11 00:45:46

Oh, I don't want to ever give up, but at the same time, it is possible to try too hard (the whole "Whitney dressed as Britney" thing).

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 00:47:39

women who give up end up on Gok

"but I don't feel ready to become one of those ladies who disappears to her garden age 48, never to return, Sort of thing."

Oh I do. It's very liberating grin

bleedingstill Sat 23-Apr-11 01:16:13

Fuck. I've just found my new home. Buggering hell

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 07:57:15

What is the best thing for the rib cage roll then? Exercise and low carb both of which I have re started with a vengeance. Am having a wine free month too but that is because I am knackered and have been going out way too much.

minieggfan Sat 23-Apr-11 08:06:53

LadyofCornsilk - yes you may have hit on it (my name was a bit of a giveaway!).

I am going to give up sugar, start running and only drink the wine at weekends.

Not all middle aged women have the midriff bulge. It CAN'T be inevitable.

faustina Sat 23-Apr-11 08:13:16

not inevitable. I think it's because your metabolism suddenly slows right down, so you need to do more and eat less to make up for that, and from bitter experience, it's better to do it sooner rather than later, because when you lose weight at this age things don't ping back like they used to.

foundwanting Sat 23-Apr-11 08:15:59

DS1 took a picture of me in the garden my bikini. <<sob>>

Does anyone know where Nigella got her burquini?

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 08:19:11

I feel quite motivated by this read for some reason. It is not like the style one or the diet one it feels more specific and relevant to me and I think the support and recognition is great. My main aim now is to shift my midriff as I think it bothers me most. I don.t think I even had it at Xmas!

cabbageroses Sat 23-Apr-11 08:28:05

fedupandfifty- I feel for you.

Your GP is being unreasonable. Latest research shows no/practically no increase in breast cancer using HRT for 5 years, then a small rise gradually up to 10+ years.

There was a huge discussion on this on Woman's Hour a few months back with drs. One woman dr said many women drs take HRT and her view was that 10 years' use was safe.

Even drs who are very conservative should/will prescribe for a couple of years.

My gynae's view is that it is the patient's choice once he has explained the risks. He is a top rate specialist who is dr to some of the royal family.

I have taken it for 2.5 years now and feel great- loads of energy, weight normal same as before HRT, sleeping better, feel more sexual....

if you want to try it then I'd suggest you see another dr or find a menopause clinic or private gynae.

minieggfan Sat 23-Apr-11 08:38:52

What is best way to start running? I assume I need special trainers - any tips on ones to get?

I hope people will post their progress on here so we can all feel the positive vibe.

Worst thing for me (apart from lack of sleep) is that I had a breast reduction last year (36 H to 36 DD) and now I have dear little beautiful breasts and a mid section like a stout barrel. I think I had not noticed the stomach under all the boobage!

foundwanting Sat 23-Apr-11 08:45:45

noddyholder Someone will be along in a little while to extol the virtues of the Shred dvd.

I know it works, but I hate it so much.

Just weighed myself on the wii and my little mii's t-shirt is too small for her fat belly. I'm at the top limit of my healthy weight range. It's just so awkwardly distributed.

My face now takes about 8 hours to settle into position. Two years ago, I could look vaguely OK by 11 am.

My upper chest is covered in thread veins. No potions are helping and I can't afford laser treatment.

I have a gunt. sad

Must do something. But what? How? When? And will it make any bloody difference?

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 08:54:32

What is a gunt?

minieggfannomore Sat 23-Apr-11 08:54:33

A gunt? How awful!!

foundwanting Sat 23-Apr-11 08:57:19

It is a delightful bulge/shelf of flab located midway between ones gut and ones cunt.

Often, but not always, exaggerated by a section scar.


noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 09:02:15

Haha I am not doing the shred thing will just up my walking and do some pilates

minieggfannomore Sat 23-Apr-11 09:02:24

Yeah .. gunt here too.

foundwanting Sat 23-Apr-11 09:07:52

It was still there even at my thinnest and most toned miniegg.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 09:12:26

faustina you're so right about losing the weight sooner rather than later. I put about half a stone on at xmas but I've found it really hard to shift this year through normal dieting/exercise and have had to up my game.
minnieeggfan - I only run on the treadmill at the gym - started in about March and already can see a difference with my gunt. Can go up to 5k on the treadmill now from about 5 mins when I first started! I just got some running trainers from Sportsworld. I haven't yet got the courage to run outside though. Will running make my face sag? <worried>

minieggfannomore Sat 23-Apr-11 09:25:49

It all sounds like such hard work!
Maybe I will make a feature of the gunt instead.
At school I was taught by a troop of nice middle aged ladies who all looked 7 months pregnant. They just tied their belts above their bellies and got on with it.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 09:26:44

but once we have the flat tummies we can keep them that way surely? <hopeful>

chipstick10 Sat 23-Apr-11 09:28:44

Everytime i start an excersize prog i end up feeling really ill. It knocks me bandy for a week. Walking on a treadmill is fine but anymore is a no no. At our time of life is walking on a treadmill really enough?

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 09:31:52

sadly probably not sad

minieggfannomore Sat 23-Apr-11 09:35:15

LadyCorny you have inspired me to get on the treadmill.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 09:40:41


mittenkitten007 Sat 23-Apr-11 09:41:00

chipstick you probably have to work up to it veeerrry gradually. The tendency for so many people trying to start a fitness programme is to jump in with both feet and immediately increase time / speed /incline all at once in order to see results. Then you get ill and are set back a week. If you are doing, say, 20 minutes try first doing 4 of those minutes (in the middle) at a sort of trot. Do that for a couple of weeks, then increase the time you are on the treadmill by 10% (2 minutes). Etc. It doesn't seem like much but well within a year you will be doing 30 - 40 minutes of jogging or even running. HTH.

mittenkitten007 Sat 23-Apr-11 09:43:55

Pondering . . . maybe that is the answer for Ms Sausage Thighs here . . . I must get off the cross trainer and onto the treadmill. Again.

Like the idea of some sort of booster club for us perimenopausal mners -- something to feel good about even if no amount of exercise, creams etc will make me look like a 20 year old supermoddle.

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 09:44:25

If I just up the exercise a bit and eat less I do usually see results ESP low carb. Apparently 200 less calories a day after 45! I am going to have to seriously address eating out and wine I think that's my downfall.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 09:48:38

200 less calories a day?! Bloody hell.

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 09:54:59

My dp is hopeless as support he just says you look ok enjoy yourself but he is 50 with a six pack and the body of a 20 yr old who goes to the gym every day! Thank god he is bald grin

rubyrubyruby Sat 23-Apr-11 09:55:20

I don't have a fat ribcage - I'm so glad I have that to look forward to!

Hard exercise is all that works for me. A walk around the park just doesn't do it.

Pagwatch Sat 23-Apr-11 09:57:27

I am working my way into an exercise regime.
I really admire people who just go "right, I am going to the gym 3x a week" but I have history of back problems and I end up hurting myself.
Plus I can only exercise around caring for ds2 and dd , which means that during holidays it becomes difficult and that gets disheartening.
I do dynamic yoga for 1 1/2 hours every week and the difference in my back is remarkable.
And I keep doing weeks of shred. And I got wii zumba for mothers day and that is a killer.

I have found it hard - putting on a stone over such a short period and just not being able to lose it. Really depressing. But getting compliments on holiday helped a bit. It is like someone said up thread, I think I am a young looking older woman rather than an old looking young woman.
I get lots of "fucking hell really?" when people hear I am 50 this year. I guess that just accepting that shift in attitude is the secret.
My ds1 having his 18th and going to uni is a good time to do this. All part of the change I guess.

Do I sound like someone trying to convince themselves grin <<cries>>

mittenkitten007 Sat 23-Apr-11 10:01:48

Anyone here bought the Ines de la Fressange book? Any good? I ask because she is une femme d'un certain age and yet a)thin and b) a style icon and c) did I mention thin?

VerityBrulee Sat 23-Apr-11 10:07:52

I'm 42, and not ready for this thread yet <denial>

For inspiration I give you Emmanuelle Alt age 45 and Ines de la Fressange age 54

BTW, I seriously cut back on dairy and wheat about 6 months ago, and I'm skinnier than I was at 20. I know it's a bit extreme, but gets results.

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 10:12:49

I love this thread as I am finding it inspiring. I think the worst thing is I have always taken how I look for granted and now I can,t

pointydog Sat 23-Apr-11 10:13:11

Hell's bells, pag, you are nearly 50!? I never imagined you to be so old wink.

lol @ fat rib cage. I am in a perpetual state of conquering a fat rib cage.

On another thread, someone called their gunt a 'ken doll'. I quite liked that. Even more so because I haven't got one of those.

pointydog Sat 23-Apr-11 10:13:54

I don't do gym. It's boring.

Pagwatch Sat 23-Apr-11 10:19:16

Is running as good an option as I suspect?
Those of you who run, have you always run or if not, how did you start iyswim.

Running would be easier in terms of logistics than my gym visits but I just have cross country nightmares.

How do you start?

Pagwatch Sat 23-Apr-11 10:20:07

grin at pointy . Cheeky mare.

I ought to have a party really.......

pointydog Sat 23-Apr-11 10:24:22

Make sure it finishes by 11pm. You'll be tired.

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 10:25:49

What can I have as a snack in the evening when skinny do and ds are stuffing cakes in!?!

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 10:26:14

Dp not do

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 10:26:25

pag I'm still building up the courage to run outside - I really want to do a 5k marathon. I just run on the treadmill at the moment. Am scared to run outside as I'm so red faced!

echt Sat 23-Apr-11 10:27:26

Running - try Couch to 5K, it's really achievable and doesn't take more than half an hour each session.

teahouse you mentioned stress incontinence and the fact that you're on HRT. Google it to find out the research on this, and be pissed off it's not mentioned in the side effects, though it's very well-documented.

I'm fortunate enough not to need HRT now, but found incontinence cleared up very quickly after stopping it.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 10:27:44

noddyI think that protein in the evening is meant to be good but I've been having cheese and oatcakes which should be fattening but hasn't been IYSWIM.

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 10:31:57

Thanks corny am off out now for my 2 laps of the big park it's 3 miles and all I can muster! Then to the co op to get some supplies as going to my mums for a BBQ tomorrow and it will be calorie central.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 10:33:52

I may go for a run round the deer park later if I'm feeling brave but I'm going to wait for everyone to go home first!

mittenkitten007 Sat 23-Apr-11 10:34:52

Right. Off to gym to subject thunder thighs to treadmill.

Swedes2 Sat 23-Apr-11 10:40:21

I'm finding this thread inspiring too.

I am going to start c25K just as soon as my youngest gets over his chickenpox and our Easter visitors have gone. Next Sunday I think that means for me -- I'll start out by shuffling round the block at dusk. And I'm cutting calories too.

I think running is the way to go.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 10:42:15

25k - wow! <awestruck>

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 10:42:36

can er have a MN menopause marathon?

Pagwatch Sat 23-Apr-11 10:43:40

Thanks corny. will look at couch to 5k. We do have some decent places to run locally.

Noddy, I like dips in the evening. A really garlicy dip especially. With celery, cucumber etc. I can eat a lot of that without feeling deprived. Or cold meats.

The only trouble is they go really well with a glass of wine...

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 10:44:27

ah yes the soon as I smell garlic I find it difficult to resist.

Swedes2 Sat 23-Apr-11 10:49:10

LadyCorny - No not 25K C25K is couch to 5K. grin

minieggfannomore Sat 23-Apr-11 11:00:39

Yeah .. until recently when I told people my son was 23 I always got "No .. I can't believe it" etc. etc.
Now I just get "Oh really" sad

fedupandfifty Sat 23-Apr-11 11:17:14

cabbage - thanks for the advice. I don't go to the Doctor's as a rule, so I'm not sure what the etiquette is about questioning his diagnosis. I've only recently changed to him, and it was a bit of a faff, so I don't want to change again if I can help it. I should have read up anyway, so it's partly my fault that I'm not better informed, but I started to feel better over the winter. Now I'm feeling flushy again and it really drags me down sometimes as it affects my motivation to do stuff. Are you through the meno yet? I seem to have got over the not-sleeping bit, at least.

PS - has anyone bought themselves a bike yet? I have!! I'm not sure if it's any good for calorie burning, but I got asked out by a man I accidentally pinned against the wall whilst on mine!!

Swedes2 Sat 23-Apr-11 11:26:09

This is me out for a Sunday spin on my bike

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 11:29:40

that picture reminds me of my sister and myself on a moped in corfu. When we went up a hill the bike tipped up and we both fell off the back.

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sat 23-Apr-11 12:18:51

Pag - started running at 35 ( I think - it was some time ago) - I'd never run before. We used to hide in a friend's house when we did cross country at school as the route passed her back garden.

I didn't do a timed run/walk thing - I had a route that was a half mile out and a half mile back from home and I just went out and randomly ran/walked it until I could run the whole mile. Then i just added on. The first time I went was with dh and he pushed me to run about the last 300 m back to the house and I seriously thought I was going to die. I lay on the living room floor for about 20 mins after. You need to push past your comfort zone but don't go too fast or too far otherwise you'll think feck it I can't run and give up. Try running between lamposts and then go to every other lampost. Set yourself little targets.

I've run pretty religiously every week since and it definitely helps level my mood among other things. And it's good if you're time poor or only have random chunks of time where you can't go regularly to a class. All the better if you can find a friend to go with or get some music on an ipod and take that for company.

I've rambled but try it. How bad can it be grin?

nothingnatural Sat 23-Apr-11 12:25:00

Hey ladies, count me in.

I'm 43 and tragically rapidly instead of my trim, chic mum starting back at me in the mirror I'm starting to see my jowly baggy father gurning in the glass.


I am short, 5'3" and always have been an effortless size 8/10 (yeah yeah I know) but now have increasing bulk and creases everywhere.

I tried running but my hips and back hurt so retreated to my bed.

Every Feb I give up booze for a month and then feel spectacular all sort of whizzy and fit and gorgeous but then start back on it and <sigh> look like crap again.

Irritatingly I have a younger dh who feels the need to comment on my advancing years. I really should trade him in for an older model. If I had a nice comfy 50 yr old I'm sure he'd appreciate me more.

adamschic Sat 23-Apr-11 12:28:24

I'm contemplating HRT atm. Sick of hot flushes and sleep problems.

Ive got a big birthday coming up in a couple of months. I agree it's crap, especially as I'm still single and cannot imagine any guy fancying me again, well some still do but I don't fancy them.

mittenkitten007 Sat 23-Apr-11 12:42:19

Did "intervals" on the treadmill. Bleurgh. I think I'm fit when I do the cross-trainer and then I get on the treadmill and see how un-fit I really am.

Those who've given up carbs, dairy, etc: WTF do you EAT? I have already cut out sugar, coffee and alcohol. I feel like a Quaker or something. But if I can't have Ryvita or a piece of bread I will starve. Surely you cannot be snacking on beef jerky or something.

chipstick10 Sat 23-Apr-11 12:46:14

Mitten thanks for the advice. I do have a tendency to go at it great guns. I will try and relax a little and hope for results.

chipstick10 Sat 23-Apr-11 12:53:48

I tell you what i do do and have done on and off since i purchased it in 1999. I rebound. It is apparently the best overall excersize you can do. It works absolutely everything. Every tissue, muscle bone and organ. It is not hard on the joints and is extremely effective if you are prepared to put in the effort and its pretty enjoyable.

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sat 23-Apr-11 12:53:54

I can't run on the treadmill mitten - I just feel crap and get shin splints, so I stick to the cross and rower at the gym. Much prefer running outside.

I'm currently avoiding bread - unless it's really nice bread [hopeless]

mittenkitten007 Sat 23-Apr-11 12:57:23

adamschic I think the hormonal fluctuations knock your confidence for six. They have mine.

chipstick today I only did two intervals of running for three minutes apiece -- in 15 total minutes of relatively fast walking -- and I was about ready to black out. Onward and upward -- though at a gradual pace. grin Put the grade up to say 5% -- it will help with your heel strike or something (can't remember exact mechanics) and prevent shin splints.

CointreauVersial Sat 23-Apr-11 12:58:40

A big big thumbs up for Couch to 5K - I was a total sport-dodger a year ago, never did any exercise at all. I tried just "going for a run", pushed myself too hard too quickly, and spent about a week afterwards barely able to walk! Couch to 5K starts you at the very beginning - literally 60 seconds gentle jogging for the first session - so it was achieveable, a great feeling. There are lots of motivating podcasts with all the timings worked out for you, so you just follow the instructions.

After nine weeks last summer I was able to run without stopping for 30 minutes, and I am still pinching myself that I achieved it. I run two or three times a week, going out at 6.30am so I'm back before DH leaves for work, I have my shower, and I haven't eaten into the day (fewer people around at that time to see me stagger/wobble along). Absolutely brilliant, anyone can do it! I did buy decent shoes from a running shop, but only a few weeks into the programme, but they are well worth it.

The second string to my bow was giving up carbs - sugar, bread, spuds, rice etc. Yes, Mitten, I do snack on salami and cubes of cheese - protein fills you up far better than carbs! Dead easy diet, much preferable to calorie-counting, and eating less "bulky" meals instantly dealt with the pot belly.

So, a year on, bye bye back-fat and gunt grin; face still looks like a bag of old frogs, but hey, not much I can do there. But I do feel so much better in myself. Now I just need the HRT, and I will be sorted......

mittenkitten007 Sat 23-Apr-11 13:00:21

Saggar DH is always coming home with "really nice bread" . . . . angry

chipstick10 Sat 23-Apr-11 13:38:56

Mitten do you mean i should put the incline up a bit!!!!!!!! confused

teahouse Sat 23-Apr-11 14:01:08

Echt - thanks for the info re HRT and stress incontinence but weighing up the pros and cons, HRT wins hands down.

I too need to lose a few pounds - I used to be a size 8 and now am creeping up to a size 10, but the thought of running fills me with horror. I think I may try to see if I can get our Wii working and give that a try; I can then exercise in private/secret ;o)

cyb Sat 23-Apr-11 14:04:36

Oh its too hot for running

Plus my varicose veins are giving me jip

I did the Shred DVD for 3 days last week after a long break from weight training exercise and thought next morning 'Ohhh. THAT's what my arms are supposed to feel like'

Just been into town and bought a nice khaki jersey frock from Uniqlo but its cut longer at the back than the front and my knees look like 2 yorkshire puds


noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 14:16:41


mittenkitten007 Sat 23-Apr-11 14:57:27

salami! (blubs at thought of giving up bread-type snackies)

chips, yes -- apparently when you run on a treadmill you're more likely to get overuse injuries because the surface is always the same so each stride is exactly like the last. (That said, until I work my way back up to a couple of miles per workout I doubt I'm in any danger of overusing much of anything.) Anyway, to have a healthier stride the advice is to put the incline up to keep yourself from "overstriding" and "heel striking" -- the recommended incline is 2 - 5%. I don't really notice it and the good thing is it works the bum more too.

TheGirlWhoIsBootilicious Sat 23-Apr-11 15:00:22

This has become my favourite thread

Will post later but still reading my way down to the end.

moondog Sat 23-Apr-11 15:12:09

Vey very funny thread.
Am HOOTING at Wendy claiming she looks like Lindow Man and Swedes assuring us that looking at her garden 'not a euph' and the gunt thing.

Look at it as simple mechanics.
The vehicle os getting old and needs more servicing and TLC.
Routine, gooi food, not much booze and yes, yes, yes to exercise, partic. running.

bibbitybobbityhat Sat 23-Apr-11 15:17:20

Right done my measurements for the first time in about 25 years:

Arse is 2 inches bigger than baps (fair enough)
Waist (ha ha haaaaaa) is only 5 inches smaller than baps shock
Tummy or that great landslide beneath the waist is only 1 inch smaller than hips. Bigger than my bloody chest!


Its going to be walking, pilates, halving wine intake and halving other carbs for me. I can't do more than that or I will be at risk of murdering someone dear to me.

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sat 23-Apr-11 15:19:18

arf @ Yorkshire pudding knees. Matches my rice-pudding backside.

moondog Sat 23-Apr-11 15:20:47

That gunt thing is weird isn't it?
(I can't imagine anyone here has one, I hasten to add. You all sound quite Well Maintained.)

A sort of apron of fat.
I think it is down to shit processed food. I reckon all those ready meals and cook in sauces and bad alcohol settles down there.

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sat 23-Apr-11 15:21:16

bibbity - I have no boobs and pretty soon the gunt and the muffin top will measure bigger than the bit I do have. <peers down>

The tape measure stays in the drawer.

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 15:47:15

I have taken to lifting various bits of myself up in the mirror I can do it with a fair few areas now!

moondog Sat 23-Apr-11 15:48:17

I have just explained what a 'gunt' is to my dh. Could hardly speak for laughing.

bibbitybobbityhat Sat 23-Apr-11 16:29:24

Tbh, I have never heard of a gunt before today.

I suppose its a gut that covers your .... ?

cyb Sat 23-Apr-11 16:48:55

I've just bought that 17 day diet book

<total MUG>

bibbitybobbityhat Sat 23-Apr-11 16:55:10

Cyb, I thought you and Noddy had firmly taken yourselves in hand on the ntagasf bootcamps. Can't believe you need that poxy 17 day diet (although my dh has said he is going to buy it and I might just casually glance at it if I spot it lying around).

cyb Sat 23-Apr-11 16:57:07

bibs I am the size of a barrage balloon

Almost a stone heavier than my 40th GASP which was almost exactly a year ago

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 16:59:35

I unfortunately found that most things tasted as good as slim felt hence where I am now BUT the difference is the ability I used to have of shifting any weight by a strict week of eating uber healthily has deserted me!

bibbitybobbityhat Sat 23-Apr-11 17:04:07

Thats a bummer.

Yes, I used to be able to lose 4lb in a week just by being quite careful.

Those days are lonnnggg gone.

Googling "middle aged spread - images". I look like all the pictures.

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 17:05:49

I saw a woman with a real barrel shape today at the bus stop. It is so so ageing to be middley worse than wrinkles I think. Even slim older women look odd with teh extra roll I hate it so much

Bonsoir Sat 23-Apr-11 17:06:39

This thread is great. I need to stop drinking wine at home (had given up buying wine at all but fairly stressful winter led me to cave in again) urgently as I identify with all the posters who say that it interferes with a good night's sleep, and a good night's sleep is essential to feeling/looking good. And I need to stop wearing heels, ever, other than for dinners where I am not going to walk, as they kill my knees and then I hobble around all the next day.

Also have a sneaking suspicion that I have gained a couple of kilos. Grrrr.

cyb Sat 23-Apr-11 17:08:24

Bonsoir my heart sank when I saw you had added to the thread - I thought you were going to tell us all off for eating too much and not wearing neckerchiefs

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 17:17:46

I must say I look better and feel better with no alcohol

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sat 23-Apr-11 17:21:34

Yes me too. If I've had even a couple of glasses of wine I wake up at about 3 am and have this odd feeling like I'm about to explode confused It's not a flush or a sweat, it's just odd.

cyb Sat 23-Apr-11 17:22:11

I hardly drink anything. i really dont. So whats happened to me?

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 17:24:11

I don't drink much either but had been out for about 4 out of 7 nights and really was looking ropey! And as you say waking up consumed with a feeling of heat and dread and fidgeting! My mum will talk about weight all day tomorrow while piling the plates high.

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sat 23-Apr-11 17:24:11

Perhaps you should start cyb smile

<hands cyb stiff drink>

cyb Sat 23-Apr-11 17:25:04

yes staggering around in a permanent half pissed daze might just be what I need !

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sat 23-Apr-11 17:27:33

4 nights out of 7 noddy?!

Respect! After one night out I'm nodding in my chair the next day and going off to bed at 9.

<lies down>

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 17:30:27

I've just had a little nap. Fell asleep in front of 'Hook' and drooled all over the couch. Classy. Even my mum didn't do that.

moondog Sat 23-Apr-11 17:47:34

'waking up consumed with a feeling of heat and dread and fidgeting!'

That sums up the morning after perfectly.

Why is it that one feels so hideous after a few drinks as one gets older?

I used to have constitution of an ox.

It is also physically draining. I am then exhausted for about 3 days.

These days even a G&T is a bit rock 'n roll. hmm

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 17:49:19

My face looks like those wrappers you get round satsumas at xmas if I have more than 2 glasses.

cyb Sat 23-Apr-11 18:02:55

corny I had a nap yesterday

I never nap

<pulls blanket round knees>

FolornHope Sat 23-Apr-11 18:04:28

this is so freaky can you all stop it

am 40 with no symptoms but you are scaring me

noddyholder Sat 23-Apr-11 18:05:09

You have 4 years now bugger off grin

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sat 23-Apr-11 18:08:19

Enjoy it while you can Forlorn. See you back here in a few years.

Deaddei Sat 23-Apr-11 18:14:44

Very hard to shift that flab round the middle.
I have stopped drinking, eat healthily, even attend the gym but it is still there, with a life of it's own.
I am luckily in that I'm very tall, so as long as I dress appropriately, it is hidden.
But I know it is still there.

bibbitybobbityhat Sat 23-Apr-11 18:25:55

I have gained 20lb since I was 40 (8 years ago) - having a baby and giving up smoking and comfort eating my way through my father's terminal illness in the meantime have also contributed, not just age.

And even when I was 40 I was about 7lb more than I wanted to be.

bigTillyMint Sat 23-Apr-11 18:31:16

Just found this thread and read it all. Can I join too

I am constantly fighting an ongoing battle with excess flab - Deaddei, that is me too! WWs are my friends, and will be especially so on Tuesday, after a 2 weeks 5 star eating holidayblush

I am a rather horrified to see Bonsoir here, though - if she's feeling it, what hope have the rest of use mere mortals got?

bigTillyMint Sat 23-Apr-11 18:34:33

My mother has always been an apple-shape(to say the least!), with no fashion-sense, but she has got wonderful skin, even at 80. And she enjoys eating - it would never have crossed her mind to diet.

Maybe it's not that bad to be over-weight?

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 18:51:10

that's genes and good nutrition though Tilly surely. I don't believe this choose between your arse and your face business.

bigTillyMint Sat 23-Apr-11 18:56:06

Well, if it's genes, I haven't inherited her skinsad or body-shapesmile. She does eat well - good quality food I mean, although alot of fat and sugar. I don't think she ever chose between the two - just enjoyed eating and was never into exercise of any sort!

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 18:57:16

Bet she didn't smoke

mittenkitten007 Sat 23-Apr-11 19:02:38

I thought more recently it had become "choose between your arse and injectable fillers."

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sat 23-Apr-11 19:02:51

I have good skin. smile

<seeks to find some positives>

Shame it's lower down my face then it used to be.

bigTillyMint Sat 23-Apr-11 19:05:04

Nah. Well unless you count about one Peter Syuvesant menthol a week in the early 70'sgrin

But I only smoked a max of about 5 -10 a week between about 18 and 30.

I think it's all the cold cream she used to slather on every night. Maybe she still does!

bigTillyMint Sat 23-Apr-11 19:07:43


And my tits, tummy thighs and knees are lower down than they used to be!

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sat 23-Apr-11 19:09:47

<stands on head>


fifitot Sat 23-Apr-11 19:17:38

I am loving this thread. 47 going on 48. Had a baby last year (yes I know it's a miracle) and so look more tired than I would have normally.

Age does creep up on you though doesn't it? I am amazed when I see my wrinkly face looking back at me in the mirror. If I could have a brow lift and something done with the way my skin is starting to droop round my mouth, I would be great though!

I am naturally skinny so that means I kind of still have a youthfulish body (when dressed that is). Though a bit too skinny at the moment.

I don't dress for my age as have lost my style mojo since having kids late in life. Live in converse and hoodys - I really need a makeover.

You know I remember when you could walk in a bar and men would check you out. Not that I need validating but you know what I mean. Now they dont even glance because I am a middle aged woman. And I am NOT happy about it all!!!! If I could afford it and knew it would be a good subtle job, would defo have a facelift.......

bigTillyMint Sat 23-Apr-11 19:17:47


kerrymumbles Sat 23-Apr-11 19:23:13

is it too late to join in?

i'm 49 next month!!! starting to sag in places i didn't think one could sag. it's all rather tiresome. I wouldn't mind so much but dh is erm, significantly younger and I do have to keep up. sigh.

the midriff poundage is driving me demented. this is not helped by the c-section overhang blush

i prefer elasticted waist. shock horror

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sat 23-Apr-11 19:26:19

You know I have to say having babies and the menopause must be pretty taxing. I had my youngest when I was 30 so she's 18 this year. There's no way I'd cope now.

kerrymumbles Sat 23-Apr-11 19:26:22

the hot flashes just started a week or so ago.

i hate them

kerrymumbles Sat 23-Apr-11 19:27:56

i will give you all hope that despite being fat rounded in the belly I was out with dh the other night and getting plenty of male attention. I don't quite look old yet.

i don't think we're dead or past it or whatever, even at 50.

fifitot Sat 23-Apr-11 19:32:17

Well don't think in the menopause yet! My late baby is an indicator of that but it musn't be far off I guess. Think my my mum was 55 so hopefully it will be longer for me.

adamschic Sat 23-Apr-11 19:43:48

I had hot flushes 2 yrs ago that stopped for a while, then came back with a vengence less than a yr ago when periods stopped. I do exercise but not enough. Gave up smoking recently so need to watch my weight. I won't be giving up alcohol as well.

On the plus size I don't look too bad with clothes on, forget naked I can hardly bear looking at myself.

Swedes2 Sat 23-Apr-11 20:05:33

fitfot - Hmm. I pretty much entered perimenopause the moment I'd pushed out (by planned c-section grin) my little boy, at 44. To the point where I wonder sometimes if they removed my ovaries or something.

I'm glad to see Bonsoir here. She can keep us all on the straight and narrow for good grooming.

Today I've been to the garden centre. grin
Ate a lunch of salad, puy lentils and roasted tomatoes. With just balsalmic vinegar for a dressing. I passed on the cheese, salami, and wine.
Tonight DH and I are eating fillet steak and roasted red peppers (stuffed with tomatoes, crushed garlic and basil and slow roasted in the Aga). I've worked out that the fillet is about 180cals a pepper 48cals and 5 cherry tomatoes about 25calores. With this I'll be having a green salad, prob watercress and rocket. Do you think I can have 2 glasses of wine? I haven't had any for over a week?

Does anyone have a recipe for an oil free salad dressing that is a bit gutsy?

All your posts are brilliant, than you so much.

cyb Sat 23-Apr-11 20:07:03

Am I the youngest on here with these evil symptoms? Am 41 in a weeks time....

Swedes2 Sat 23-Apr-11 20:10:19

Just before I go and throw my steak on the skillet, how many of you live in jeans and converse/type footwear?

Even when I go out for a dinner these days I wear a dress over jeans and plimmies. It's a bit like getting half dressed and I should address it.

WhatsWrongWithYou Sat 23-Apr-11 20:11:49

Talking about saggy bits, has anyone else's arse dropped several inches?

Mine used to be fab, and I still have long legs and shapely thighs, but now feel blush at the prospect of anyone seeing my rear view in skinny jeans.

I need to crank up my visits to the gym, plus try and do lots of squats and lunges (yes, I know, the shred is my friend hmm).

Or I could maybe perfect backing out of rooms.

I've lost about a stone and a half, having gained 2 about 4 years ago. It's taken this long to get 2/3 of the way back to normal. I seem to take one step forward, two steps back (or one pound down two pounds up).

Only about 10lbs to go, but I've been at this stage so many times and ended up porky again, it's really not funny.

I did start a sugar free regime a few weeks ago, and have lost about 4lbs since then, so that's encouraging. Followed the Potatoes not Prozac method, which I did for years until I put my nose spectacularly in the trough fell off the wagon and gained the 2 stone.

The best thing is you get to have a baked spud in the evening - but it does mean I have to get through Easter with no chocolate, otherwise it's back to square one trying to wean off the stuff again.

kerrymumbles Sat 23-Apr-11 20:13:25

i find jean uncomfortable but wear them nonetheless. if i go out i'm in dresses, dress trousers. that's it. finding dresses and skirts much more enjoyable and comfortable lately than trousers.

stomach really has gotten out of control in the last week or so. i have expanded ffs. started with hot flashes actually.

dh and i were at garden centre as well today grin

kerrymumbles Sat 23-Apr-11 20:14:52

my arse is still in great condition, SOLELY due to squats. I'm on a rather decent weight on the bar now. Mind you I HATE squats. They are quite difficult and draining to do.

have to start on lunges.

cyb Sat 23-Apr-11 20:15:31

swedes I dont live in jeans and cons altho my latest purchases have def been more for 'comfort' as much as style

adamschic Sat 23-Apr-11 20:17:16

Cyb, it is quite young to be going through it. My doc says I'm slightly young at 49 as the average age is 52. Have you had your levels checked to confirm it. Mine FSH was in overdrive.

Gawd today for breakfast I ate a mini pork pie, lunch was a snack box at KFC, shared a chocolate egg, little one with DD, dinner was at an italian, a seafood tagliatelli followed by half share of tirimusu, one glass of white and will polish off a bottle red by bedtime. I am aware that this is horrendously unhealthy but I have allowed DD aged 16 to dictate where we ate whilst out shopping. We are both going on a healthy eating kick after the holidays and going to increase my exercise. DD is walking lots.

Anyone know how long it lasts, a couple of friends aged 53 say its all finished for them now.

kerrymumbles Sat 23-Apr-11 20:17:49

what is this baked spud business? I'm assuming i can't slather it in butter and sour cream?

kerrymumbles Sat 23-Apr-11 20:19:21

what do you mean by through it adam? symptoms can last for years before your periods completely cease. The menopause is defined by 12 months without having a period.

WhatsWrongWithYou Sat 23-Apr-11 20:26:36

I have my baked spud cooked in oil hasselback style, with mayonnaise.

Potatoes not Prozac website, for those who may be interested.

Bonsoir Sat 23-Apr-11 20:27:36

If any of you want face cream recommendations, I highly recommend Génifique. I was given a pot of the night cream in December and it is still going strong (probably a couple of months' worth left) and it really does do what it promises and leave skin much, much softer.

WhatsWrongWithYou Sat 23-Apr-11 20:29:53

Is it 12 months? I thought it was 2 years. I was period-free for 6 months, but came on last December. Since then I've only had the 'scrapings from the bottom of the Bovril jar' a la Cyb . < boak >

DH said, 'so we could still have another baby?!' confused.

Bonsoir Sat 23-Apr-11 20:31:27

I'm on a break from jeans at the moment and have two pairs of Houlihans - vintage navy and khaki - which can be dressed up very well for evening with high wedge sandals and a silk blouse. Lots of cheaper look a likes in the shops.

fifitot Sat 23-Apr-11 20:31:27

Well I am still breastfeeding so don't know if and when periods will start. How will I know if I am peri-menopausal? Have no symptoms as far as I can tell.

MrsGuyOfGisbourne Sat 23-Apr-11 20:33:57

Well, am assuming I must be menopausal as no period now for 3 months and previously were regular on the dot, but can't say it seems too bad as yet. Am taking prog only Pill - mybe that helps? Have always been a keen gardener (planted three trees today grin) - still like fashion - found lots more energy when i lost two stone, today jumped in the river Thames with my DC as it was hot and the river was THERE -so waitng to see...

kerrymumbles Sat 23-Apr-11 20:34:32

those look lovely bonsoir but don't know if i can manage with the stomach.

that's the other thing. where on earth can i find trousers that don't rid my hips?

WhatsWrongWithYou Sat 23-Apr-11 20:37:37

I agree houlihans are a great alternative to jeans but on me they accentuate the saddle bags, plus I don't really suit a utilitarian look. Cropped trousers are more flattering for me.

BecauseImWoeufIt Sat 23-Apr-11 20:38:05

<sidles in at the back>

adamschic Sat 23-Apr-11 20:40:29

Friends at this age say their symptoms have ceased. So periods completely ended as well as all the other horrible meno upsets. My periods stopped very suddenly and hormones fluctuations kicked in quickly so am hoping it will be over with quickly. If not i will go on HRT.

bigTillyMint Sat 23-Apr-11 20:54:58

My periods were very uneven in timing and flow from about 42/3? Terrible,terrible PMT-type mood swings, etc. night-sweatsfrom about 43/44? and hot flushes during the day in the last year or so - I'm 46.

My GP said that my bloods show that I'm probably in the peri-menopause and that it could go on for yearssad
She put me on a progesterone only pill - no periods at all so far (hurray!), and the black cohosh I have been taking seems to finally be working on the hot flushes and night sweatssmile

Houlihans no good to me either - my waist and hips aren't too bad mostly, but the saddlebags are!

nothingnatural Sat 23-Apr-11 21:48:17

Hello, it's 5.30am here (Australia). I'm sure having children later in life (I have a 3 & 5 yr old) hasn't done me any favours. All these early mornings are positively wrecking me. Also the amazing dazzling sunshine seems to have frazzled my decolletage (SUCH a splendid word) in the 5 years I've been here. It's so dreary but true - that lovely tan is SO bad for your skin. Not that I'm ready to embrace the Nigella Lawson Burkini yet.

I was in a cafe yesterday looking at the young waitresses - all groovy late teens/early twenties and they were all so beautiful. Youth really is lovely.


WhatsWrongWithYou Sat 23-Apr-11 21:54:05

For the decolletage...
I've been sleeping in a soft bra for the last few years - wonder if this is worth a punt?

nothingnatural Sat 23-Apr-11 21:55:26


Thank you wwwy grin will order one this instant.

cyb Sat 23-Apr-11 21:57:14

nothing, yes everyone seemed very young and perky looking to me today too

Where have all the ugly people gone?

<falls to knees>

kerrymumbles Sat 23-Apr-11 22:01:56

a friend told me recently: beauty fades but ugly is forever....

WhatsWrongWithYou Sat 23-Apr-11 22:16:16

Erm I've just ordered one blush.

kerrymumbles Sat 23-Apr-11 22:17:55

please report back. mine has developed lines and i hate them

coffeeinbed Sat 23-Apr-11 22:18:28

Oh, Genifique is a miracle in a bottle.
Note to self - must go for a run again.
The only other thing that seems to help with the weight is the no carb, low fat diet.
No wine as well, because couple of glasses and them I cannot sleep.
Blimey, this aging business's not fun at all.
On the plus side - the Tracy Anderson DVD got my arms in shape again!

Swedes2 Sat 23-Apr-11 22:21:43

I opted for the two glasses of wine and I'm now only semi-coherent. <<cheap drunk>>

Those Houlihans are lovely but I'm too lard of arse to carry them off. I can only wear very dark indigo jeans as it is. Wouldn't the pockets in the Houlihans interfere with the drape/hang of any dress?

I'm terrified of becoming pashmina woman.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 22:23:54

yes the houlihans look very nice but ££££

Swedes2 Sat 23-Apr-11 22:24:19

LOL at that decollette thing: it's the menopausal woman's peekaboo bra.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 22:25:15

well quite - it looks a bit saucy!

Swedes2 Sat 23-Apr-11 22:26:10

BIWI - Hello my lovely. Nice to see you here. Are you fading too?

CointreauVersial Sat 23-Apr-11 22:38:09

I just wish I had the confidence I have now, back when I still had the youth to carry it off!

Yeah, decolletage - where did all those pesky wrinkles come from? I have belatedly started to moisturise, but I fear I'm about 10 years too late. Everything is sliding slooowwwwly south.

nothingnatural Sat 23-Apr-11 22:38:24

Sorry wwyd I really didn't mean to be rude, it just looks like some frumpy sex item and made me laugh.

I recently bought a tiny black negligee with matching saucy knickers. I was intending to spice things up a bit at home but felt frighteningly like this

Swedes2 Sat 23-Apr-11 22:44:51

I'm going to John Lewis next week to return two cushions that I've decided I don't like, I'll go and see the nice lady at the Lancome counter and get some of that magic cream. Don't buy anything from Benefit, it's rubbish.

The best body routine I've found is as follows:
Elemis Lime and Ginger Scrub every other day -- it's extremely moisturising.
And every day after showering I moisturise my by body with this it's excellent

I used to use Dr Hauschka stuff but the above works better.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sat 23-Apr-11 22:52:42

does that palmers stuff smell really sweet? Have never got over being told that I smelled like rice pudding after using the palmers body lotion.

stleger Sat 23-Apr-11 23:04:58

Step away from the Per Una - except the jeans which are the only ones that fit me!

hellymelly Sat 23-Apr-11 23:17:44

I agree with the utter knackeringness of having late babies.I'm another one peri-menopausal and breast feeding at the same time (my dd is three though).I was hoping my gunt and general flub was just bf weight,now I think maybe its more depressing. I was under nine stone at 40 and now I'm at least ten and a half.Two babies,two c-sections (hence the gunt) and six long years of sleep deprivation later.I need to start running too.
I had to see a chiropractor yesterday.I was lying on the couch,in pants and a bra,and he sort of shook me by my feet,which sent a ripple of flubber along me ,like a slinky.Hideous.Totally mortifying.

KristinaM Sun 24-Apr-11 00:41:36

helly, you are so right about the late babies. i had one at 42 and another at nearly 44. the last one was still bf until 3.5. i have been struggling to lose weight since he stopped two years ago. i was blaming my under active thyroid and the cs overhang but now im wondering if im peri menopausal and i haven't noticed

i cant get rid of the gunt, despite being an ok weight and dress size. and kerry, i have to tell you that squats with 20kg and lunges with 10kg are having NO effect on it whatsoever sad

having read this thread im really worried i will have to start running shock

please tell me there is an alternative?

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 01:21:21

kristina - the squats and lunges doing nothing for my overhang and fat belly either but my arse is in great shape grin

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 01:22:43

one thing i have found that has helped is taking linseed every day. my weight stalls here and there and i need something to get it going down again.

i hardly eat anything. am told this is a huge part of the problem

nothingnatural Sun 24-Apr-11 01:32:03

Can I just add EXFOLIATE to the general discussion.

I am currently exfoliating so hard I'm practically giving myself a peel.

Also we call a gunt (never heard that word before) a front bum. Partic when showed off proudly in a pair of high waisted trews with a tucked in t-shirt <shudder>

nothingnatural Sun 24-Apr-11 01:35:08

Kerry how can you hardly eat anything? Are you hungry all the time? I eat like a horse and am dreading the time (right now) when I have to slow down and just pick at food. So dreary.

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 01:49:32

they say eating nothing is bad for your weight because then anything you DO eat will be stored by your body as fat confused

i dunno. just not as hungry as I used to be. Am ravenous after the gym though. Now all i have to do is work out in the mornings instead of night....

minieggfannomore Sun 24-Apr-11 07:21:50

Adam - my periods stopped over a year ago (I am 52). I am still having the hot flushes, palpitations, sleep problems. I have also developed a considerable spare tyre. I feel like a Weeble Person.

No idea how long it goes on for. I think it may differ for everyone.

MinnieEggs Sun 24-Apr-11 08:23:12

<<pulls up a chair>>

Nearly 48, 2 dc (11 & 8) and loving this thread (have read it all!!)

Am hating menopause (peri). Both motivation and sex drive walked out hand in hand, slamming the door in my face (charming) about 5 years ago and have had no contact from them since sad.

Feel desperately sorry for very frustrated tolerant loving DH (9 years younger than me) who must be secretly wondering where it all went so wrong.

Saw these on a thread started by Cristiane the other day and love love loved them BUT first thought - too old!!! Very very similar to wedges I bought when I was a teenager.

Have no grey hairs at all <<thankful>> (yet) but DD (11) has taken to saying 'when you wear that you look like grandma' just one too many times.

I'm sure we are meant to embrace these years but am buggered if I know how.

<<goes back to bed>>

KristinaM Sun 24-Apr-11 08:37:04

Kerry, please tell me more another the linseed?

And what DOES get rid of the gunt?

KristinaM Sun 24-Apr-11 08:37:44

Sorry I mean more about linseed blush

Bonsoir Sun 24-Apr-11 08:41:54

Linseed is a natural laxative. My mother swears by it and sprinkles a spoonful on her bowl of birdfood breakfast cereal every morning.

KristinaM Sun 24-Apr-11 09:01:40

Thanks bonsoir

BecauseImWoeufIt Sun 24-Apr-11 09:15:44

<waves to Swedes>

I'm 51, nearly 52 and I am perimenopausal (sounds like the start of an AA meeting ...)

Hot flushes and erratic periods started about 3 years ago.

I have a definite gunt, although not really sure if that's menopausal or due to bad eating over the last couple of years. Although I'm a low carb advocate, I just don't seem to be able to get my head around it enough to really lose any weight - I need to lose at least a stone and a half. Is it harder? I don't know - but my self-control/motivation seems to have flown out of the window.

HRT is something I've ruled out as my mother died from breast cancer.

My other, most hateful symptom is acne - horrible spots along my jaw line and on my chin. Even when they're not 'active' spots, I seem to constantly have the red, fading scars which only just disappear when the next lot surface.

But I haven't noticed that I look any older, at least not yet. I started going grey years ago, so am used to having my hair highlighted (although I am increasingly blonde - to cover up the white - the Ann Widdecome school of hairdressing!)

I have always used expensive moisturisers. I have no idea if this makes a difference, but I'm not prepared to change now. I used to use RoC, which has retinol in it - one of the few ingredients actually proven to work - but I also read that it can be harmful to skin (can't remember why now), so I stopped using that brand. My latest 'regime' involves the Boots No 7 products, Protect and Perfect (or whatever they're called), and I moisturise in the morning and again at night.

I'm currently trying an Elemis 'system', Tri-enzyme anti-ageing, to see if this will help with the acne. It's a facial wash, followed by a serum and then by a moisturiser.

Three things that I have discovered that definitely helps with the hot flushes:

- a low carb diet
- avoidance of alcohol (I fail regularly on this count)
- Boots Menolieve tablets (based primarily on Black Cohosh I think)

I'm starting to feel creaky and have a problem with one of my knees - although obviously this is more likely to age-related rather than something to do with the menopause, and I'm aware that I take no exercise whatsoever, so this is something I have to change. Every week I think I'll start going back to the gym, but somehow I don't manage it!

fifitot Sun 24-Apr-11 09:20:48

i have a really sore neck and can't turn my head around due I think to falling asleep while breastfeeding.

Plus horrid hard skin build up on my feet! I think feet start to play up as you age don't they?

Also second the late children business. I need at least 10 hours beauty sleep to look somehow normal but get around 4 in a row if lucky. Hence I am beyond dark circles, just horrible hollow eyes............

minieggfannomore Sun 24-Apr-11 09:48:59

I went out to a fiftieth birthday party last night. Lot of wine and cake. Am literally round today. Like a beach ball.

Have barbecue to go to later. Can i avoid the alcohol and carb laden goodies? Probably not. Will have to start Couch25K and low carbing on Monday.

Am also going to buy the Menolieve tablets and the fancy mascara. Will pass on the decolletage device though.

WhatsWrongWithYou Sun 24-Apr-11 09:49:57

Kerry, do you take soaked linseeds? I was recommended them by a nutritionist a few years ago. You had to soak them overnight to get them 'active' then gulp them down in the morning.

Was reminiscent of wallpaper paste but I think it did a good job < trails off Les Dawson style > on the bowels.

But I can't force myself to take anything disgusting for the sake of my health I'm afraid, so I gave up with them.

Swedes2 Sun 24-Apr-11 10:26:42

We could all do couch to 5K together? It only takes 10 weeks. Who's up for it? I'm starting a week tomorrow -- my runs are going to be at dusk so fewer people can see me in my full glory. I am also going to go back to playing lots of tennis.

My eldest sister is 51 and she looks terrific. Slim as anything (she exercises fairly rigourously) she's still glowing and gorgeus. She is on the pill -- microgynon -- and it works perfectly for her. Her GP has told her she can't keep taking it forever but she keeps telling him to just write the prescription. Before she was on the pill, she said she felt like she was losing her mind and feeling foggy and a bit low.

I think my hair needs to be lighter than it is. I'm quite a dark brunette with fair freckly skin and blue/green eyes. My colouring used to be striking but now I just look knackered. I've been having hazlenut-coloured hi-lights for some time but now I think I need to go to a new colourist and go a bit lighter. But a friend told me there was a hair colour called menopausal blonde and that's putting me off. Help

Bonsoir Sun 24-Apr-11 10:33:36

Running at dusk? shock Who makes dinner and does homework supervision in your household?

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sun 24-Apr-11 10:36:08

Fifitot - Flexitol for your feet. Fab.

And I hope you're all using your sunsreen.

<peers over bifocals>

Yes, I need those too. Sigh.

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sun 24-Apr-11 10:37:24

Mine are way past homework help (and dinner's a bit hit and miss too tbh)

minieggfannomore Sun 24-Apr-11 10:38:23

I would like to do the Couch 2 5K with you Swede. I will start a week tomorrow too (gives me a week to prepare!).

Don't worry about the 'menopausal blonde' thing. I am/was blonde anyway (also with freckly skin) and I get highlights to cover any grey. Highlights now very light (white blonde). I like it. It's better than grey.

Swedes2 Sun 24-Apr-11 10:41:33

miniegg - Oh that's great, thank youl. Do you have an iPod/iPhone -- you can download an app for the couch to 5K. I'll link to it later.

nothingnatural Sun 24-Apr-11 10:43:18

Swedes, I'll do the couch25k with you. I need to get my mojo back and a bit of gentle running will do nicely. I think I'll be doing a mix of dawn and later in the day - how many times a week do you have to do it?

Swedes2 Sun 24-Apr-11 10:45:31

Bonsoir - You don't have to do it at dusk. Does your DD get homework? In any case, my littlies go to bed looooong before dusk.

Bonsoir Sun 24-Apr-11 10:49:14

Yes, my DD has homework! And she certainly doesn't feel like doing it right after school (she likes to go the park for a play with her friends if she doesn't have an afterschool activity). We normally get home at about 6.30 pm.

Bonsoir Sun 24-Apr-11 10:50:12

The only realistic time for me to go running is right after school drop off at 9am. Hmm.

BecauseImWoeufIt Sun 24-Apr-11 10:50:31

Swedes - I've just been googling the C25K this morning - will reluctantly happily join you! Although dusk might be an issue; I'm definitely better with exercise first thing.

Swedes2 Sun 24-Apr-11 10:54:03

Nothingnatural - Great, thank you. We can all support each other.

couch to 5K here

It takes 9 weeks. And apparently if you have a bad/hard week, it's best to just repeat a week.
DH and DS1 (who are both v v fit) are trying to get me to run the Herts 10k with them in October.

We could all get together and run a 5K in the summer - at some convenient location? We could all then go out and celebrate together afterwards.

CrosswordAddict Sun 24-Apr-11 10:54:10

I'd love to power walk/jog but my boobs joggle up and down which is painful and embarrassing(cup size F)and even when I diet they still stay the same. If I had my time over again I'd go for breast reduction at age 20. Too late now, as I am post-menopausal and don't think the trauma is worth it for such a short term. I've probably got more fatal/important things to worry about now if you see what I mean.
If it's any help ladies, you feel a whole lot better once the periods and stuff is over. At least you can go away on holiday without looking at the calendar. Also I don't have pmt or any of the other stuff that goes with periods.

noddyholder Sun 24-Apr-11 10:54:45

Unfortunately I cannot run due to a heart condition but I can walk miles! And I have been doing that for about 9 days now and already noticing a huge difference esp in stamina. The first couple of days I couldn't wait to reach the coffee place(in park) to sit down whereas now I happily pass it 2 or 3 times on my circuit! I really feel the exercise is the key to looking and feeling good about yourself and eating a healthy diet aswell. On day 6 I think of no wine and i think it is working i look better first thing even one glass makes me crepey.Good luck with the running x

Swedes2 Sun 24-Apr-11 10:55:24

BIWI - Great. Yes, everyone should just do it on the days/times most convenient to them.

That's 4 of us now.

Pagwatch Sun 24-Apr-11 11:02:19

Oh lord, I might join you.

<<really doesn't want to but thinks she should>>

I had to cure myself of the not eating thing too. I would miss breakfast, then get busy with something and would realise it was half three and I still hadn't eaten.
It is terrible for us. We fuck over our metabolism and it makes us very very tired. It can disrupt your hormones too which is the last thi g we need. And hormones plus bad metabolism makes fat and tired.

I know you know this. I know I know this.
I just have to keep saying it out loud. It is bloody annoying isn't it.

mittenkitten007 Sun 24-Apr-11 11:03:48

I will do Couch to 5k too. I really need the motivation to keep with this.

Crossword, you just need a really good sports bra. You can get some that look a bit like corsets complete with the little hooks up the front and then you can jump up and down and NOTHING will dare jiggle even slightly.

Swedes I have similar (fading) colouring and really want to go blonder as well because it will help hide the grey roots.

mittenkitten007 Sun 24-Apr-11 11:07:26

Sports bras . . . with zippers!

Whatever you get, it's gonna look like part of a uniform issued by an Eastern Bloc country during the cold war but -- it doesn't matter.

Swedes2 Sun 24-Apr-11 11:14:05

Pagwatch & Mittenkitty - Marvellous. Six of us now.

So we have a week to limber up and get kitted out. I'm going to go and get a really good sports bra and I'm also going to go to one of those running shops and get a pair of really good running shoes, that are suitable for the way I run. (They make you run on a machine and analyse your footfall.) That way I'm less likely to give up due to injury.

noddyholder Sun 24-Apr-11 11:15:58

Oh no I feel left out now! grin I shall come at teh end and provide a picnic of my fab cooking and show off teh results of my walking mania!

WhatsWrongWithYou Sun 24-Apr-11 11:16:22

Crossword, I have G cups and I wear an Enell bra - the one mitten was talking about I think. It's like a straitjacket to get on but those babies ain't going nowhere!

I'd love to do the 5k thing but wonder if you can do it at the gym?
I know outdoor is best, but where I live I'm surrounded by woods and hills. I can run locally as I had a 3 month phase a couple of years ago, to kick-start my weight loss - but I've just negotiated an upgrade to a peak-time gym membership with DH, and he'll be thoroughly pissed off if I don't use it.

I'm thinking if I run outside twice a week then once at the gym that might cover all angles.

Swedes2 Sun 24-Apr-11 11:19:48

Noddy - Argh - sorry. You are absolutely included. Can you do a 9 week power-walking regime alongside us?

Pagwatch Sun 24-Apr-11 11:20:10

We have one of those in town swedes. I would need running shoes too. And nigellas beach outfit to run in.

Do you think if I go and blast a fortune in sweaty Betty I will feel better about the wobbly bum and bright red face.

I am trying to figure out how to do this without telling dh. He is lovely. But his support will consists of saying " have you run yet, are you going out today, you could go now, shall I phone you and remind you, how far did you run, aren't you leaving it too late, if you ran more than the download says you would get on quicker......"

Blackduck Sun 24-Apr-11 11:23:22

I thought it was just me...I am the wrong side of 45 and until about two years ago was an effortless size 8 (5'2") now I am a 10 and I don't even want to get on the scales. I have a tum and annoying bits on my hips (are they saddle bags?). Too much wine and it takes me a week to recover (I have taken to watering it down <sob>). Am realising it is now time to buy good, well cut expensive clothes, as cheap tat are just unforgiving......

mittenkitten007 Sun 24-Apr-11 11:26:13

WWWY -- YES! I couldn't remember the maker but it is indeed Enell. Black and a bit shiny, right? DH thought I might be able to bring in some side income as a dominatrix.

Right now though I'm only a C/D and in my good old Champion high-compression bra -- not that flattering but does the job and doesn't overheat me. Might treat myself to a new one as it looks a bit pilly and disreputable.

Nothing like getting some new workout clothes for motivation . . . !

noddyholder Sun 24-Apr-11 11:35:47

I am only joking swedes I am planning to up the walking and see if i can make it a run eventually. I have out foxed the docs many times and this is just another challenge! Now shoes I do need a pair Where to get them and what kind?

nothingnatural Sun 24-Apr-11 11:38:36

Pag, my dh is exactly the same, he thinks he's being lovely and supportive and I want to kill him. I wish he'd just leave me al

nothingnatural Sun 24-Apr-11 11:39:29

I wish he'd just leave me ALONE. (bloody iPhone)

Swedes2 Sun 24-Apr-11 11:42:01

I think we have to be all for one and one for all. Barring injury or something devastating, we absolutely MUST stay with the programme. It is perfectly OK to repeat a week, just so long as we keep going.

Bonsoir - are you in?

Pagwatch - grin at your DH. You might have to be like that actuary who took a lover and told the wife he was with his lover and the lover he was with his wife, but really he was in the office doing actuarial calculations.

WhatsWrongWithYou Sun 24-Apr-11 12:10:13

The best way I found, when I had my brief foray into running, was to go straight after the school run. I don't get out of the car so it didn't matter that I was unwashed and in running kit.

Not so easy if you work, though.

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 12:15:53

i take milled linseed in some yoghurt with berries, sunflower seeds and manuka honey. it's not so bad that way

adamschic Sun 24-Apr-11 12:19:47

I have heard that too about undereating, I'm eating slightly more since stopped smoking and haven't piled on too much weight. Will get some Linseed Oil.

Anyone tried Evening Primrose for flushes, I discussed this with my doc and might be worth a try before I go on synthetic hormones.

Just got the tape measure out for the first time in years. 37/27/36. Long way off my 36/23/33 that I was in my prime but not too bad. I am only 5ft 2 so every inch shows. I am going to cut out puds and going walking tonight. Might even try cutting down on the wine (never drink if I have work in the morning but off on long hols atm). I've allowed myself to be lax since quitting the cigs so might have to sack that idea and work on that later. Won't go shopping until I've trimmed up. Can anyone share where they shop for this stylish 50 something look. On a budget. My usual places/price range is Next/DP's but couldn't find anything suitable yesterday.

Unfortunately I got sun damage on my chest in my late 20's so have had wrinkles there for years. Don't understand how that contraption can prevent neck wrinkles but anyone who has tried it, please report back. It might be worth investing in. grin

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 12:21:44

yes that is another thing... (playing catch up)

does anyone else have fucked up bowels? the linseed is the only thing that keeps me regular. it has the added benefit of taking some poundage off. remember as we get older we have to think about things like healthy bowels (i.e. cancer)

dunno about the gunt. think it's the ultimate in shite to have a gunt, a c-section scar AND an overhang sad

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 12:23:53

dont' think the linseed oil helps with the weight (though i could be wrong) dh said something about it being extremely high in fiber and having "shitloads" of omega 6 and 9

Aldi has it cheap. only 2.49 euro for a bag that costs up to 10 euro in health food stores.

bigTillyMint Sun 24-Apr-11 12:24:04

I hate running, but can do 5k on the treadmill. I don't seem to be able to get the pace right on the road. But I keep thinking I should try.....

Will you be posting the daily program on here?

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 12:24:48

my sex life is overdrive however. am constantly horny. might have something to do with the youngish dh though....

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 12:25:15

is DISTRAUGHT that pag called me by my formal name.....

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 12:30:36

biwi - i highly recommend weight training to build up your muscles. this takes stress off of surrounding joints. my knees are shite and one is almost completely 100% now due to weight training regime. if the muscles are strong - they take the weight instead of joints (if that makes sense). before i started weight training i couldn't squat on my haunches and get back up again without some effort. now it's no problem at all.

i think at our age we should also consider essential fatty acids to help with joints, etc.

noddyholder Sun 24-Apr-11 12:31:18

I am loving having an older dp tbh as otherwise i would be in trouble!

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 12:32:13

2nd saggar on the sunscreen. I am rarely in the sun but have somehow managed to get the dreaded AGE SPOTS (kill me now please) shock sad

Pagwatch Sun 24-Apr-11 12:47:06

Sorry km, you lovely thing. How could I be so staid? Must be my age.. grin

Noddy. Dh is 7 years younger than me <<cries>>

LadyCornyOfSilk Sun 24-Apr-11 12:48:47

getting together to run a 5k sounds like a great idea - bet you lot all live in London though!
I read in a running magazine that there's a 90 minute window after a run(didn't say how long the run had to be - your max I suppose) where your body burns up any food that you eat.
I'm in with the couch to 5k thing - only run on the treadmill so running outside will be new for me.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sun 24-Apr-11 12:50:43

yy to weight training as well. I have no joint problems and have been doing weights for as few years now. Body pump is a good way to start off. It's meant to be really beneficial in later life if you weight train.

LadyCornyOfSilk Sun 24-Apr-11 12:52:47

shock absorbers are on brand alley at the moment if anyone needs one.

BecauseImWoeufIt Sun 24-Apr-11 12:57:03

I'm going to have to go the gym as well, aren't I ...

LadyCornyOfSilk Sun 24-Apr-11 12:59:15

yes you are!
Nike on brand alley as well. I need to get some decent kit to run outside. I look like a painter and decorator in my gym stuff.

cyb Sun 24-Apr-11 13:11:48

See, I can run 5 k. I ran it the other week. I just choose not too for some bone idle reason

Me and my similarly afflicted 40+ friend went for a 7 mile walk/goss this morning and then both weighed ourselves at hers. We both said having lithe, smooth skinned teen girl daighters does NOTHING for ones fragile self esteem.

I'm going to lose 10lbs, she's got about a stone an a half to lose


<throws soil in air>

cyb Sun 24-Apr-11 13:13:34

Oh and I started mauling my lips about this morning and saw to my horror that a couple of my back teeth are

looking a bit too much like this


Pagwatch Sun 24-Apr-11 13:14:46

yeah! as god is my witness!

<<pukes up radishes for menopausal sisterhood>>

cyb Sun 24-Apr-11 13:21:22

atta girl Pag!

I had a high protein brunch post walk

About my H he is 50 next year but looks younger than me. I hate him. He weighs less than me most of the time too

LadyCornyOfSilk Sun 24-Apr-11 13:30:08

as God is my witness I will loose the gunt (and half a stone)

mittenkitten007 Sun 24-Apr-11 13:46:57

I will lose the thighs . . . and the belly.

minieggfannomore Sun 24-Apr-11 13:47:56

Crossword - I had a breast reduction last year (age 51). It was definitely worth it. I feel so much better and I can run without giving myself 2 black eyes.

cyb Sun 24-Apr-11 14:01:42

I hope you are all eating rotten radishes while you are making these promises

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 14:10:23

do NOT pull teeth. Repair at all costs.

it is a slippery road to dentures....

WhatsWrongWithYou Sun 24-Apr-11 14:46:52

I will lose 10lbs, plus the belly flab (refuse to call it a gunt ) < prim >, and I will lift my aese by at least 2 inches (how many square/lunges did you say it takes, Kerry?) < wibbles >

My problem with exercise has been the scoliosis I was diagnosed with when DD was 18m old. Had back pain from when DS1 was a baby but I thought it was just because he was such a huge baby. Then DD the other heffalumps and DS2 came along and it just got progressively worse.
Was told by a physio that 'the worst thing you can do is charge around an aerobics hall,' so stuck with the ineffectual, boring exercise I was prescribed, which kind of eased the pain a bit but it came back if I left off for a while (which I inevitably did, since lying on your bedroom floor stretching is hardly feel-good stuff).

Now I've had the revelation that just going to the gym and strengthening my muscles -nothing fancy - actually helps, and I feel as if I'm doing 'proper' exercise at last. It does still hurt, though, but I'm determined not to let it transform me into someone stooped-over, old-before-my-time, and limited in my activities.

I feel like it's now or never as regards to sorting out my back - nothing's going to get better by itself!
Sorry for the ramble blush.

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sun 24-Apr-11 14:53:50

I'm already running at least 5k but I will join you in spririt and will go out/to the gym at least 4 times a week. Promise.

Kerry - I've lived will dodgy bowels due to a surgery as a baby and then again in my 20s. Shall I tell you what keeps me regular? Yes, you've guessed it. More running grin And less wheat. But I struggle with that one.

saggarmakersbottomknocker Sun 24-Apr-11 14:56:13

cyb - yes 17 year-old size 8 dds are a bummer aren't they. envy

moondog Sun 24-Apr-11 15:12:57

Runnig really makes such a difference to one's mood, aches and pains, sleep patterns, ability to cope with stress, confidence and so on, it really does.
I'm not menopausal at 43 (and even if I was I would never telly anyone, not even on the internet) but blow me, running makes such a difference.

I exercise quite a lot anyway but there is a treadmill in the flat I am in at the moment (abroad with dh) so I do 5km a day (even if it is too bloody hot to do them until the evening-people below must think I am a nutter). A few weeks of that leaves me in fighting form.

CointreauVersial Sun 24-Apr-11 15:37:02

So impressed with your fighting spirit - age shall not wither you lot!

I shan't join you on your Couch to 5k quest, having already done it, but all I can say is that the suppport of fellow strugglers on MN was hugely motivating (I can't possibly stop running....gasp....puff.....what will I tell everyone in my next post?).

On the subject of linseed, you can buy it ready-ground at the health-food shop (sometimes sold as flax-seed), and Holland & Barrett do some nice blends with nuts/sunflower seeds that taste nice on yogurt etc. Linseed is a low-carber's friend, as it's easy to get bunged up with all those eggs.

Kerry - I am relieved to report that I still have all my own teeth....I'm on the slippery slope towards bifocals, though.

adamschic Sun 24-Apr-11 15:41:17

The meno is a fact of life for all women, nothing to be ashamed of really.

I don't like running so won't be able to join in the couch to 5K. I feel silly running round the streets. Would prefer to walk, then jog once I'm out of sight.

CointreauVersial Sun 24-Apr-11 15:56:52

It's not that I'm ashamed of the menopause, just that it has come as an almighty shock.

At a time in my life when I've finally got myself in shape, and my confidence is at an all-time high, suddenly there it is, a reminder that my senior years are just around the corner.

It's the loss of libido that worries me; DH is already starting to take it personally.

BecauseImWoeufIt Sun 24-Apr-11 15:59:36

OK - I've never been running before. Apart from running shoes (which I've got), and some sort of appropriate kit, how do you manage to carry everything with you? House keys, iphone for the C25K app, water, etc?

moondog Sun 24-Apr-11 16:03:37

Strap an iPod to your arm, tie a key to your lace or buy running tights with a little pocket at the back. You don't need water.

moondog Sun 24-Apr-11 16:05:05

Re menopause, fair enough on an internet forum but I have several colleagues who don't stop banging on about it. I think it is really unprofessional to dicuss your gynaecological issues in the workplace.
Waaaaay tmi.

BecauseImWoeufIt Sun 24-Apr-11 16:36:12

Running tights?! I'll have to run in the dark otherwise I'll get arrested for looking offensive in a built-up area.

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 16:37:31

i can't run because of dodgy knees. i do power walk and treadmill run but have to change to eliptical trainers (or whatever they're called) when knees start protesting

LadyCornyOfSilk Sun 24-Apr-11 16:48:09

I forgot that I needed a strap for my i-pod. Will have to postpone running outside then..

LadyCornyOfSilk Sun 24-Apr-11 16:52:44

folk who run outside - what do you wear? I need links

LadyCornyOfSilk Sun 24-Apr-11 16:55:39

these have a worrying camel's toe-like appearance

moondog Sun 24-Apr-11 16:57:37

Just wear anything!
It doesn't have to be posh.
I've worn the same thing for exercise for about 5 years.
I don't understand people who spend loads on clothes to sweat in.

mittenkitten007 Sun 24-Apr-11 17:01:10

Re TMI: Sure, not in a workplace, but this thread has been a huge boost for me. I always thought I'd hit perimenopause much later (like my mum) so it was a huge shock to me that my youth was indisputably coming to an end . . . however, the idea that I can train for a 5K run is so positive and I would never have come up with it on my own.

KM, have you tried riding the stationary bike? I have a dodgy knee too and was advised by a physio to do this -- apparently it actually "sands down" (lovely) any rough spots on the cartilage inside.

BecauseImWoeufIt Sun 24-Apr-11 17:02:39

And they're £95, Corny!!! <faints>

moondog Sun 24-Apr-11 17:05:03

I wear something a bit like those Corn but they didn't cost anything like that!#I also have no truck with all the paraphernalia and special shoes and crap like that written on that ad.
'Compression panels reduce muscle vibration conserving vital energy and making your workout more efficient.'

Complete bollocks.

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 17:06:23

unfortunately i find stationary bike irritates my fanjo.

mittenkitten007 Sun 24-Apr-11 17:07:32

Am going to wear my ancient Nike workout capris, but LadyCorny if you're really worried you can always try this

moondog Sun 24-Apr-11 17:08:56

Stationary bike riding.
I could think of nothing more soul destroying.

mittenkitten007 Sun 24-Apr-11 17:10:56

Being on crutches is worse than stationary bike riding.

kerrymumbles Sun 24-Apr-11 17:12:04

would have to agree with mitten...

LadyCornyOfSilk Sun 24-Apr-11 17:22:26

rofl at camel tame -ds wants to know why I'm spitting coffee on the keyboard