So my husband and I have been married for almost a year. His ex wife is extremely bitter about their divorce. He asked for a divorce, and let her take everything, including full custody of the kid. She never fight for them to stay together. She just said Ok, and took everything (including a lot of money.) And she moved to Turkey with the child (to marry another man), without his permission. 5 days after the divorce was final. He didn't want to fight over anything. But in doing so, he never set boundaries. Most of the time, he has to beg to get her to FaceTime about an hour once a week. But our barely happens. She doesn't respond a lot to his questions or calls about their daughter.
We couldn't afford to fly any sooner, but had discussed with her for almost a year about us coming to Germany (mutual ground. They both have family there). She assured us she was saving and wouldn't keep his daughter from him. We agree on a time. We buy flights for a two week trip (coming from the U.S., not cheap.)
After weeks of asking her to buy her own flights, and a million excuses why she can't, I offer my husband that I'll pay for them from my savings. Finally, she agreed. But only if I'm not there. So I buy them without knowing the stipulation.
My husband's response to her, "ok". Because again he doesn't want to fight with her. But instead I'm left hurting, and we're fighting. I've been looking forward to meeting my step daughter. Since we started dating. She's seen me on FaceTime, but only after we were married. And I'm excited for us to finally be together. (Just for a week, that's all she would agree to.) He hasn't seen his daughter in 1.5 years.
My husband can't understand why it's important that we're all together.
Do I have a right, as a step mom, to be with my husband while he has visitation? I understand her dislike of me. I'm his new wife. And she knows she can do whatever she wants, and he'll keep paying the child support. Even alienating him from his daughter, completely.
I told him I'd take a poll. So basically that's what I'm doing.
Who thinks my husband should put his foot down, and who thinks I shouldn't have to be there? Thanks for your opinion.
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Step-parenting
My husband's ex wife won't let him have child if I'm there
49 replies
Kerrycficht · 01/09/2016 21:18
OP posts:
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