Short history - dsd is 18 and has been living with DH and I since she was 12. I love her but am really really struggling with her irresponsible behaviour. She dropped out of college twice because she couldn't be bothered to study. She has been going from job to job and quits just before they fire her. She fights very hard not to work full time as she says it's just too hard for her. It's a struggle to get her to do anything to help out around the house.
She has received a number of default letters from a monthly contract she took out and doesn't bother to pay, it's just a matter of time till the bailiffs show up at our door. We payed her monthly bill a month ago to try to jump start a more mature attitude to paying her bills but she defaulted again and we have refused to pay again.
She'd agreed to pay us back £30 a fortnight when she gets paid, along with £25 a week in rent. She calls in sick all the time to work and last week went to the dr to get signed off for a week because of her back. There is nothing wrong with her back and that night she was out with friends till all hours of the night and every night since she was signed off. Anyway, today was pay day and she should have got paid for 2 days but she is saying she didn't get paid anything and so can't pay us.
I feel really angry about this and told my DH I know she is lying. He started ranting that he knows and it's always a battle with her and he's so tired of it. This is him deflecting because he knows I'm mad, he knows I want him to call her on her lie and if it were up to him he would let her do what ever she wants.
Part of me says just leave them to it, it's his problem she is growing up to be irresponsible. The other part of me loves her and wants to help her learn responsibility as she can not go through life like this. I want to suggest DH asks her for a copy of her bank statement rather then accept her lie that she wasn't paid. What do you think?
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Step-parenting
Should I pursue it or drop it?
7 replies
Findingpeace · 24/06/2016 19:09
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