Am I being oversensitive? I actually feel gutted :-(

[Bitchslappedbycensus]

It's the census here in Ireland. One of the questions is about how you are related to other household members. I have put down my DD as partner's stepchild however he has listed his sons as no relation to me. We have nbeen together nearly 5 years. All lived together as what I thought was a family for 2. I am just so upset. They are not the easiest teenagers but I have tried my best. Just feel like I've been kicked in the teeth. Am I just being oversensitive about what is basically a stupid form?

[HormonalHeap]

I understand how you feel, but if you're not married then they aren't your step children- maybe that explains it.

[Fourormore]

Could this be more about terminology than about how your partner really feels about your relation to his sons?

[spanky2]

I understand too. It's just a form. My Dh gets funny about filling in forms accurately( like the police will come and arrest him if he made a mistake!) Maybe that's why. Maybe because they are older. Do they call you by your name rather than step mum?

[Bitchslappedbycensus]

Thanks for all the replies. spanky Yes they do call me by my name and for your DH I guess my DP is the same and is going for accuracy.

[Wdigin2this]

Yeah, its like a slap in the face....but when did men ever get it, that small things like that are important to us women?

[swingofthings]

Men see things differently then we do! I remember the time my OH referred to the money I was transferring to him monthly towards the mortgage as 'rent'. It was like slap in the face to me as we were in that timescale when I was waiting for a proposal!, but it meant nothing to him at all, just the 'wrong choice of wording'! As it is, he did propose, we did get married, and his attitude to what is his/mine changed totally. Amazing how everything became suddenly ours.

We just analyse things much deeper than they do. So don't assume that his not stating you as a relationship on the form means that he considers you less important in their lives than you consider him in your children's lives.