Need to offload a little, nobody in rl is in my situation and I don't want to bang on to dp constantly as obviously he's affected more and we've discussed it at length and I don't want to add my feelings ontop.
Some may remember my last thread ( much happier about taking dsd's sister out with us) anyway things ticked along nicely, everyone was getting on etc. Dp has changed roles and his working days have changed so they had agreed temp days for 3 weeks until his new set rota was in place. They had agreed set Friday overnight every week (11am Fri till sat night) mum won't allow any other time and getting the overnight weekly was a massive plus for dp.
Anyway he randomly got a text this week saying she was taking him to the csa as the amount he pays 'is a joke' and he's an absent dad and he should pay more.
He replied he wasn't absent he has her at any opportunity he can and always texts asking for extra contact but he always gets told no. The amount he pays is above what csa will award but she's demanded an attachment to his earnings and has now refused his overnights and limited his contact to a few hours on Friday and a few on Saturday ( we live an hour away so she knows this will be a problem as it means having my 2 kids in a car for 4 hours in total and dsd for 2 hours each day)
We've decided to go to court and fight for dps rights and so he can have the contact he craves with his daughter. He's told her this and a massive shitstorm ( for lack of a better phrase) has started. Apparently we think we are indestructible and untouchable and no judge will allow an almost 3 year old overnight stays with her father etc. We have the added bonus of dp not being on the birth certificate so to get his name put on we've been told we need a dna. He's asked her and she's refused saying he's now denying he's her father ( he absolutely is not but we need it as a legality)
Dp text her saying please don't stop my overnight it's our bonding time and she loves being with her daddy. Her reply was he was a vile dad using his daughter as emotional blackmail - he's not, just a broken man desperate to see his daughter
It's all a mess and my heart is breaking for dp and dsd. She's a happy little girl and loves her dad and he dotes on her and I can see this getting far worse before its resolved.
We haven't seen her for two weeks and she hasn't stayed overnight for a month. Apparently she's going to use this in court as he hasn't been around ( we have messages begging for his access so we can prove he's tried)
Not sure how it's all gone wrong so quick! He's supposed to have contact tomorrow ( last two she cancelled on the day saying she was unwell and she's stopped him calling as he used to phone dsd between her being here) we've got Easter presents for her and her sister so even if she refuses I've said to do we will drive thru and leave the gifts to not spite the kids.
I'm flitting between sadness that this little girl is wondering where her dad is and anger at her mother for causing all this upset and then confusion as to what has caused this ( I know she wasn't happy in the begining that dp had a partner but I thought we where passed that now)
I don't know what I even expect to gain from this post but it's all bubbling on in my head and I just want to offload if anyone wants to comment then feel free ( the ones from my last post who said it would never work taking the older sister can feel free to say I told you so)
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need to vent about dps ex
21 replies
DarthPrincess · 26/03/2016 12:28
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