I just want to scream!!

(8 Posts)
Eden21 Sat 26-Apr-14 21:45:53

Tonight is the second night of staying at OH house when he has his son. Now, when he has SDS, he has him in the front passenger seat and it's there little thing. At first it was ok me sitting in the back but now it's getting ridiculous!

Secondly, DSD is badly behaved. OH is very laid back, a bit too much I'd say! We went to the supermarket today and he was running around, being rude and back chatting now OH just kept saying stop it please but never actually properly reprimanding him as I would with my child.

This evening OH is saying 'he's at a difficult age thats why he's acting this way' No Because you don't discipline him!!!

I just want to scream! It makes me doubt us ever having children!!

Unexpected Sat 26-Apr-14 22:05:35

Oh dear! How long have you known your partner? If you haven't met his son often before and you don't have children of your own, it's very easy to think of children as badly-behaved. We all swore our hypothetical children would never do x,y or z but the reality is very different! Maybe you have unrealistic expectations? Or maybe his ds IS badly behaved, difficult to tell from the little you have said. Remember if the ds doesn't live with him, each time they meet is like a small getting-to-know-you session all over again. DS may also have been over-excited (or anxious, annoyed or upset) because you were there, he's got to get used to his dad being with someone else.

How often do you end up sitting in the back seat - not often from the sound of things? How do you think his son would feel if ended up in the back seat because you were there? Tread carefully on this one!

Shortchange Sat 26-Apr-14 22:11:09

Children in the back, adults in the front. Every time.

Eden21 Sat 26-Apr-14 22:18:40

Unexpected I totally agree with treading carefully. I don't want to make him feel pushed out, that's the last thing I want.

I totally understand and take on what you say about behaviour. He is a very sweet boy, I've actually enjoyed spending time with SDS at home. He's not awfully behaved just doesn't have boundaries. OH keep saying were friends rather than dad and so which I disagree with. My profession is child related so I'm use to being around children.

TheMumsRush Sat 26-Apr-14 22:42:44

I agree with short on this one. Kids in the back,

brdgrl Sat 26-Apr-14 23:49:05

Adults in front, kids in back. Yep.

And this thing of being the friend not the dad? Yeah - that's a disaster. Proceed with caution. (says the lady married to the Friend-Dad of two teens...)

CountryGal13 Sun 27-Apr-14 13:27:04

Of course he should go in the back! He should do this whenever an another adult/older passenger is in the car, not just for you.

Anormalfamily Sun 27-Apr-14 16:37:03

Nip this front seat thing in the bud right now!
My dsc and their dad really embarrassed themselves when we visited the ILs. They live abroad and we don't see them often, but are lovely people, really generous and kind to their dgc. On one car trip (in a mini van) they refused to make room for granny and she waved it off and sat in the back with my ds. I was mortified. I'm not a good car passenger myself as I tend to get motion sick at the back, but always made a point of swapping front and second row seat with granny regularly, out of sheer courtesy.
Your dp should be teaching his ds how to treat a lady, I realize that sounds old fashioned, but respect doesn't go out of style, I find...

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