Dh and I are going through a rough patch, and even though I see he's trying, I sometimes wonder if this is it, if this is all the love/respect/consideration he can muster for a wife (we're both in our second marriage w kids). We've been together for 4 yrs and its honestly been 100% my effort to keep us going, self help books, counseling, the lot. If dh doesn't feel the full force of my boot cap up his a#*e convictions he wouldn't do a thing to make my life easier as sm. I've noticed lately that there seems to be a fair number of mners who left the blended family. When did you feel ready to throw in the towel? Or what signals were you hoping for that never came?
Alternatively, what has kept other sms sane and in the relationship?
Kaluki, interestingly he told me his kids asked him if we were getting divorced. I suppose they always realized our lives were odd. As it happened we all went on a family holiday that had been scheduled nearly a year in advance with the pils (in their country) and they treated me incredibly well, helped me cope with my bereavement, acted as gps to my ds and made everything more than bearable. As so often in life I got over it... Til this year when I just stopped leaning backwards, making excuses. Therapy is helping a lot, mostly validating what I already know. I couldn't tell you why suddenly I'm seeing dh as he is and not how I thought he was. Anyway, its our make or break year...
So his parents did the job for him!! I must admit I have often wondered what would happen if I really needed DP to be there for me. My best friend has cancer and her DH has been amazingly supportive throughout her treatment and it does make me wonder how DP would stand up to a major crisis. I can't help comparing him to my friends DH and thinking he wouldn't be able to juggle my needs with seeing his kids! Hopefully I will never find out but it makes me think!!