Our eldest DS is my son, my DH's DSS. He is 8.
For the past year he has been having regular contact with his Dad. Every other weekend for two overnight stops.
Recently some problems have arisen and I'm not sure what the 'right' thing to do is, wondering if you could let me know how it works for you?
Firstly, toys. DS has often complained that he's not allowed to bring toys back from his Dad's. Who should decide what he can/cannot bring here, DS or his Dad? My feelings are that it should be down to DS, but then I will always side with him over exDP!
Secondly, after school activities. DS plays a lot of sport. There is always 1 (but no more) match of some sort every weekend. exDP won't take him and says it's his time and he decides what they do with it. DS is on a few teams, and as such is letting them down by not attending matches, not good for DS's social life but also not a good way to teach commitment? Is exDP right?
Lastly 'special occasions'. Contact on days that have special importance, such as his birthday, Christmas etc. exDP has never been bothered about seeing DS on 'special days' and normal contact has resumed regardless of the day (if Fathers Day, for example, falls on his weekend then he goes, but if not, then he doesn't IYSWIM), with the exception of Christmas, which has always been spent with us. exDP has made arrangements in the past around Christmas contact, but either hasn't shown, o changes last minute (usually he ends up abroad). However, now exDP is expecting a baby and so is requesting to see DS on every given special occasion (bar Mothers Day ). What to do here...?
Thanks in advance...
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Connect with other Mumsnetters here for step-parenting advice and support.
Step-parenting
What do you do?
13 replies
SonShines · 17/06/2013 15:55
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.