what would you think if...

[bluer]

I am pregnant at the moment. My df has a partner who is to all intents and purposes my step mum...she's been around for ten years. She has her own dc and gc. I'd like her to be called granny but i'm not sure whether get children might be offended by this. Should I ask them before mentioning it to her? My own mum passed twelve years ago...i'm also not sure how my df will take it but I want my child to be able to have a granny iyswim

[Lostinsuffolk]

If ur cool with it, run it past ur df n if he's cool, I wouldn't have a problem with it. I am kinda laid back on the names thing thou n know there are others on here that look deeper into that kind of thing.... If it feels right and ur comfy with it, do it, I'm sure ur step mum would be very touched by it. :)

[ladydeedy]

I would think she'd feel very honoured/touch by that. I would if it were me... And like you say, she's part of your family's life and it would be great for your child to have a granny/grandma/nana (she might want to have a say in what she's called!).
good luck!

[bluer]

Thanks!

[brdgrl]

As a stepmum, I would take it as a good thing if my stepchild wanted me to be a gran to his or her children.

You say she has children and grandchildren of her own, so this is probably a non-issue in your case. But in cases where the stepmum's own children don't have kids, I'd tread more cautiously...I could see a problem if, say, the stepmum's daughter could not or did not yet have children of her own and felt badly about it; then she might feel some resentment about her stepsister's kids having her mum as a gran...not saying that is right, only that I can see how it might happen.

[Stepmooster]

Hi brdgrl, you make an interesting point. My DF girlfriend (my mum has passed away too) has decided for herself that she wants to be called 'grandma'. Initially she wanted to be known by her name, and I didn't really mind. Now she has really fallen for my DD, and I never really thought about how her own childless daughter thought about it. I know my SS (for want of a better term) is desperate to have kids and I do hope her mum wanting to be a grandma to my DD is not going to upset her.

[Frikadellen]

My children call my stepfather for grandad he has been in my life since I was 6 so it was appropriate. My father has his own name (Danish so specific) my niece doesnt call step dad grandad as d sis didn't grow up w stepdad and they have a complex relationship.

I went with what felt right.