Background: I've been with DP (BF?) for two years. We don't live together but I spend a huge amount of time with him and his DD, we've been on lots of holidays with her, very involved in each other's lives, etc.
I have never met his ex (the mother of his DD). She walked out on him when their DD was two. From what I've seen of the way she handles their 50/50 split I'm not massively impressed with her parenting. She's always asking my DP to take on extra nights during the week and extra weekends. She doesn't offer to swap, she's happy to just forfeit her time with her DD when she's got a better offer. To give you an example; she had her DD for a total of three weekends between the beginning of June and the middle of September. They'd only been back into the 'regular' routine for one fortnight before she was asking my DP to have their DD for an extra weekend because it was her birthday .
Obviously my DP loves the opportunity to spend extra time with his DD but I dunno, it's hard. Anyway, suffice it to say, I'm not that interested in being friendly with her. And so far it hasn't even come up as an issue.
But it's DP's DD's birthday soon. His ex has planned a party and my DP is going with his mum. I know that his ex's new partner will be there but so far there's been no mention of me being there.
To be honest I'd prefer not to go and have to be false with her and pretend that I don't think she's really selfish. But on the other hand if DP's DD asked me to come I absolutely would.
But the thing is I wonder whether DP might be keeping me at arm's length from the party. He just hasn't mentioned it and I don't know whether to be offended that he's not said I should come along, even though I don't want to go anyway. And how allowed is he to invite me anyway since it's his ex organising the party and not him?
I realise I may be being really childish. I just can't really get any perspective on this so I'd welcome others' points of view.
AIBU for wanting to be invited even though I don't want to go?
Is my DP BU for not inviting me?
Or is his ex BU for not inviting me?
Or AIBU to expect to be invited at all despite the fact that I'm very close to his DD and have shared beds with her in holiday, shared tents camping, pick her up from school sometimes, etc?
Connect with other Mumsnetters here for step-parenting advice and support.
Step-parenting
Am I about to be unreasonable. Genuinely can't tell. Help!
madonnawhore · 14/10/2012 22:48
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.