DH and I married 18 months ago. We bought a 3 bedroomed house specifically so that DS could have a room of his own and his DD (13) could have a bedroom to herself when she visited on alternative weekends. However 2 months after moving into the house DH broke the news to me that he'd agreed to have DSD here permanantly. I got no say in this whatsoever but what could I do? I could hardly say no. But as soon as the ball got rolling all the arguments started. She insisted on having DS's room as it's bigger than hers. I said no yet I find out that behind my back DH had told her he would "work on it as she should have the bigger room being the girl". So we argued over that and I told him there was no way I was chucking DS out of the room he'd decorated himself (some of it with his own money). DH said I was being unfair and a drama queen. This is where it all started. We have a rota where everyone that lives with us takes a turn at washing up. DSD refused to take part and DH said it was no big deal. I said it WAS a big deal as DS was having to do it and so should she. DH "had a word" with her and she said she wouldn't do it unless he bought her protective gloves so guess who kept forgetting to buy protective gloves? In the end I reluctantly bought some and she still made excuses as to why she couldn't wash up. She does nothing, she doesn't get out of bed until 1-2pm weekends and then moans that there is nothing in for her to eat, this results in DH scrambling for pans etc and cooking her whatever he can find despite the fact that DS has been told he can have a sandwich or nothing. The kids have set bed times yet he creaps into hers and tells her to "just be quiet" and she can stay up until whatever time she wants. He said she should have more pocket money than DS as DS gets maintanance off his dad (which pays for school things, clothes etc, not luxuries!) I disagreed as the maintanance gets paid to me, DS doesn't see it yet I find out he's doubled her pocket money behind my back. Everything revolves around her, days out, holidays, what we eat, he even allowed her to buy a kitten even though we'd discussed it and I had said no (as I don't like cats and we can't afford more pets). I was so angry I took it straight to a cat rescue place which resulted in a tantrum from hell, doors slamming, screaming, OTT crying, pleas of "I'm going to kill myself!" etc and DH turned to me and said "there, you happy now??" yet DH happily told DS he couldn't have a Gecko.
I am so angry and fed up with it all, I resent her so much it's like she's just stormed in here and turned my whole world upside down. DS hates her, I can't stand being around her yet deep down I know DH is the problem and he is the one doing this. Does it get any better? am I likely to "win" on this one or should I just throw in the towel and file for divorce??
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Jacko80 · 06/07/2011 16:18
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