So on May 18th I gave birth to my second beautiful baby boy....and immediately after gave birth to something entirely different.
I'll set the scene. The night before I went into labour, I got a really sore bit where the waistband of my pants was sitting. I thought the pants were maybe a bit snug so ignored it. At bedtime I took said pants off, still ouch!
So I had a feel, couldn't see anything cause of my massive bump. There it was. A boil my friends. Rock hard and the size of an egg, I shit you not. Throbbing but unyielding.
Next evening, off I trot to the hospital. Among the drama of childbirth I forgot all about my new pal. Delivered DS.
And the boil started throbbing again. And itching. Now that my bump has gone soft and jiggly I was able to get a look at the magnificent beast. It was HUGE with three small heads. I couldn't help myself. After what I'd been through, I figured I deserved a treat. I nudged it. The tiniest speck of watery pus emerged. Fuck it, I thought.
Grabbed Fred Second Head by the horns and have him a proper throttling.
BLAM! I've never seen anything like it. A jet- and I do mean a jet- of pus and blood fired up to the heavens and splattered the ceiling! I sat there utterly shocked. I summoned my mum and husband to come and take a look. They gawped at the ceiling, none of us could quite believe it.
I hadn't had my fill. I grabbed Fred again. SPLAT! I was rewarded with a handful of thick yellow gunk. And then another. Then another, mixed with blood. Then just blood. I slumped back, exhausted and unsure which feat of my genital region I was more proud of that fateful morning.
And then two nights ago, the same area felt itchy. Hello Fred, we meet again I thought. BOOM! Another handful of pus.
And guess what? There's still a hard lump there. I'm going to treat Fred to a mag sulphate facial tomorrow to see if he will come up trumps again. He's the gift that keeps on giving. I shall keep you updated.
If you want to see spot squeezing, popping or videos showing the removal of blackheads - this is the place for you.
Sporner corner
It was like giving birth twice!
BoopTheSnoot · 13/06/2016 00:33
I've never had anything like it before. I doubt I'll be lucky enough to have anything like it again. Such is life. I'll always have the memory of it 
Oh yes. I like to attend to Fred when everyone else is in bed, so that I can give him my full attention without being judged by DH
Claps hands!!! gives op a standing ovation, bloody well done, you saw to fred good and proper
You have my admiration and congrats on both the new borns 
She noticed Fred and asked if he was part of an old c-section scar 
But then of course he ruptured and she learned the ugly truth about what he is
You ARE disgusting but we don't judge here in Sporner Corner 
huge congrats on the newborns
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