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G&T at the Goose & Carrot. Freshly cooked chips. Get them while they're fresh, but mind, they're hot!

(272 Posts)
ouryve Fri 04-Apr-14 18:38:26

New Friday, new week.

Boys broke up for Easter, today. DS1 decided to break up early. Since he was hoping that today was his last day, ever, I'm actually wondering if I'll ever get him back there again.

So I have 2 weeks with the boys in the house together. I'll probably not get DS2 out of the house without the buggy, because he won't even put shoes on for me, any more. We see his paed on Wednesday and DH is finally having his dodgy tooth out on Thursday.

ouryve Fri 04-Apr-14 18:40:18

Bah. Forgot the flipping date.

It's 4/4/14

PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 18:42:45

Have you any idea when ds1 starts new school?

Broken up here too, tadpoles seem happy. Ds has had a fantastic 2 weeks and we've had some progress with emotional understanding smile

ouryve Fri 04-Apr-14 18:45:47

Still waiting for a start date. He needs to do some more assessment visits, first.

youarewinning Fri 04-Apr-14 19:04:37

So and I have broken up too grin

Great that your DS is moving forward polter. Long may it continue wine

PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 19:09:02

youare thanks, ds always does things in spurts, fingers crossed it isn't a flash in the pan.

ouryve Fri 04-Apr-14 19:18:16

Both of mine do things in spurts, too. Something always gives at the same time, though. DS2's turned into a right cocky little so and so now he's a spelling ace grin

ouryve Fri 04-Apr-14 19:19:41

Though he was making a plastic cockroach ("pider" to him!) crawl up my arm, earlier. Funny boy!

moosemama Fri 04-Apr-14 19:20:02

Polter, lovely to hear your ds has had such a great couple of weeks and is making progress.

Ds1 would love to have some tadpoles. Next-door have them in their pond, but we don't know them that well. We do get lots of teeny baby frogs in our garden when they eventually develop and leave the pond though. Dh has to be so careful when mowing the lawn! shock

Dh has just called to say he's waiting trackside for the train to come back the other way, so he can grab the conductor/guard and see if he found his backpack. Luckily he was the only person in his carriage, it only had two more stops after his and is usually pretty empty coming the other way - so fingers crossed. He's in a right state, hasn't been in the job long and is so worried about what might happen if it doesn't turn up.

I had better drag my backside off the sofa and throw together some junk food dinner, as it's so late and dh is going to be in no fit state if they haven't found his bag. hmm

PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 19:20:36

ouryve is he still spelling? Will this make communication easier?

moosemama Fri 04-Apr-14 19:21:29

Ouryve, ds1 has been a right funny boy all afternoon today - it's exhausting! grin

He seems to think it's hilarious to answer every question or respond to every request for him to do something by saying 'pie'. hmm

Am really off to make dinner now ...

PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 19:23:42

moose could you have a pond? Even a teeny one? We've got one but left our frogspawn there, but ds didn't want to put all the tadpoles he's been nurturing at school back in the school pond before they'd grown legs.

PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 19:24:37

grin at 'pie', ds does things like that too hmm

signandsingcarols Fri 04-Apr-14 19:31:37

hi all, poulter glad last couple of weeks have been good, after the good result from the AR I have had friends round for brunch (for the birthday last weekend). Got to use/show off the kitchen and for an event that was supposed to be 9.30 till 11, we were still going at 12.15 grin

ds , for the first time, grin managed a competition at school without meltdown, (easter hats, he didnt win and only said 'oh dear sad ) So so proud of him and pleased with school who have been working on this with him.

off ot nanny's next week in London... (so if anyone is around south west London next week, Richmond/Kingston/New Malden etc and fancies a coffee with a west country yokel pm me... grin )

RaRaTheNoisyLion Fri 04-Apr-14 19:49:23

Wed sign?

moosemama Fri 04-Apr-14 20:12:34

Pond wouldn't really be a great idea with my dogs. They have absolutely no brakes and use our garden like a race track. hmm

Before it was 'pie' it was 'cheese' or 'I like cheese'. Hilarious he is ... hmm grin

Sign, glad you've had a good week. Well done ds, shame he didn't win, but it sounds like he handled it really well.

Conductor told dh there was 'lost property' when they arrived at the final stop, but being a jobsworth, wouldn't tell him what it was. However, he did say, 'you can pick it up from the station from 8.00 am tomorrow morning', so we're assuming it is his bag.

Pain in the bum. He was supposed to be starting the decorating first thing tomorrow and now he's not likely to get started before lunchtime. hmm

He is, as predicted, in a real grot. He's had a bad day at work, the zip came off his coat and now his bag. Think I might hide.

I have a Tesco trifle, but am now feeling the need for wine as well!

hazeyjane Fri 04-Apr-14 20:14:36


PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 20:18:27

How was the dietician hazey?

Galena Fri 04-Apr-14 20:27:24

Just signing in but won't be about much this week - we're going away with loads of friends (11 of us total) and I am really looking forward to it!

autumnsmum Fri 04-Apr-14 20:32:15

A lovely gift arrived earlier from a goose ! Ds is shouting into a mic on a xbox game he's playing with a school friend and I found myself thinking imagine if we mumsnetters out loud . Am hoping the chickenpox is on the wane , now have nearly three weeks of holidays to get through

AtYourCervix Fri 04-Apr-14 21:10:51

Evening all.

wine for the impending Easter break.

DD2 was 16 last weekend! My Baby!!!! 16!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway. She is being remarkably civilised at the mo.

It won't last. Both her and D1 have exams. I'm not looking forward to the next few months.

PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 21:14:23

Hello AYC pleased dd2 has been better, but 16 shock

wine and cake

AtYourCervix Fri 04-Apr-14 21:19:59

I know! shock

D1 is 18 in 2 weeks! shock

How did that happen? I'm far too young to have daughters that old. <<sob>>

moosemama Fri 04-Apr-14 21:23:52

Hi AYC, good to hear dd has been giving you a break. Belated 16th birthday wishes to her.

How's that enormous puppy of yours doing? I regularly think of him when I'm telling the umpteenth person in a row that yes, my boy is actually still a puppy and no, he hasn't finished growing yet. I console myself that I know of at least one puppy that's bigger than mine. grin

PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 21:28:41

How about some puppy photos? <begs>

AYC I think you missed the thread where we discovered we are all 44 except a few youthful outliers

SummerRain Fri 04-Apr-14 21:32:21

AYC, Happy birthday to your daughters (one belated and one early as I'll forget) cake

Not much of a Friday night for me this week, have to be up at 3.30 so I should be in bed already! Just having a last cuppa with dp now the kids are in bed as I won't see him till Monday evening sometime.

AtYourCervix Fri 04-Apr-14 21:34:39

I am NOT 44.

AtYourCervix Fri 04-Apr-14 21:36:35

Phone being sill and not doing photos.

He is lovely.

moosemama Fri 04-Apr-14 21:40:04

I have a rather hopeless photo of my pup from yesterday when I was trying to work out how to use my new phone. (Please excuse the children mess. blush)

PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 21:42:10

He's lovely moose and huge! Is he as big as LurcherBoy?

AtYourCervix Fri 04-Apr-14 21:42:42

Lovely. Very elegant.

AtYourCervix Fri 04-Apr-14 21:44:54


PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 21:46:54

Is he really huge AYC? He's very cuddly looking <very jealous and considering swapping dp for a dog or two>

moosemama Fri 04-Apr-14 21:50:06

He's a good few inches taller than Lurcherboy now. Currently passing 27" at the shoulder and in all likelihood won't finish growing completely until he's around 18 months old. Fortunately he folds up small! grin

He's not at all elegant really. He has no control over his own legs and no brakes, resulting in numerous trips to the vets and more than once - several weeks on restricted exercise. hmm

You can't see it in that photo either, but he has the scruffiest, norty face and totally uncontrollable independent ears. grin

AYC, he's beautiful. I bet he gives fantastic hugs. smile

moosemama Fri 04-Apr-14 21:52:12

Lol at Polter's question about how big he is. Clever photo that AYC - nothing close by for size referencing purposes. grin

NoHaudinMaWheest Fri 04-Apr-14 21:54:02

Moose ds went through a (long) phase of saying 'chicken' to everything.

Polter glad your ds had a good couple of weeks and hope he enjoys the tadpoles. I think the link to our church tower peregrines is eventually about to happen so I will let you know when it does.

Sign so pleased the AR went well. Have a good break in London.

AYC happy birthday to your dd and best of luck with the exam angst.

Autumn good that the chicken pox is waning.

Summer sleep well.

Things not so good here. dd seems unable to use either arm now. She missed the last three days of school because it is virtually impossible to get her up the steps out of our house.
ds has only been averaging 1-2 days a week at school for the last three weeks. Hopefully his hospital admission date will come soon after Easter.

AtYourCervix Fri 04-Apr-14 21:58:56


AtYourCervix Fri 04-Apr-14 22:03:36

That sounds hard NoHaudin. Hope theres dome ilprovement in the next werks.

AtYourCervix Fri 04-Apr-14 22:04:29

Terrible typing sorty. Loooong dsy snd knackered.

Night all. Hope you slerp well.

PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 22:04:31

grin at puppy pics

NoHaudin that sounds awful, poor dd and ds sad life is just shit sometimes flowers

hazeyjane Fri 04-Apr-14 22:08:02

That is a good puppy nose - very snoopyesque.

We hushed to have a cat called Chicken, because my dsis's called everything chicken!

Dietician, was ok - in that she said straight away that she wasn't the person we should be seeing, but was a way to seeing the proper person quicker (if that makes sense). I nearly burst out laughing when she started talking about smoothies, but there was no mention of carrot sticks. Ds needs calcium and iron supplements.

I was thoroughly shamefaced when she was talking about restricting things like chocolate at exactly the moment that ds, who had been wailing and crawling around the room, reached into my bag and held aloft my bribe bag of chocolate buttons.

hazeyjane Fri 04-Apr-14 22:10:41

Sorry cross posted with you NoHaudin, sorry things are tough for your dd and ds at the moment.

I had a call today from the hospital saying they will do ds's teeth extractions in the next 3 weeks, and we have to meet the anaesthetist on Tues. Urgh, feel sick thinking about it.

PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 22:11:53

It's a hoop you've jumped through hazey and worth the smoothie comment if it gets you to see the right person. I'm still waiting to hear if the feeding clinic will accept ds, and waiting for SALT appointment too. Seems weird waiting for assessments again.

grin at chocolate buttons, he's a cheeky chap

PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 22:12:48

It will be fine hazey, it will be worth it flowers

SummerRain Fri 04-Apr-14 22:19:43

One of our cats is called Blue, because that was ds1s favourite word at the time and his response to everything, including me unwisely asking him 'what do you think we should call her?' grin

Honestly, I'm in bed... Just need to put the phone down and go to sleep!

MariaNearlyEaster Fri 04-Apr-14 22:35:19

Minihazey was listening then grin.

Polter, am wondering how could they not accept?

Summer enjoy the early night.

NoHoudin, any news on the 'urgent counselling' yet? I found this which I thought was interesting. If the specialists are all 100% convinced it's non-organic, would there be any chance of them sorting out a multidisciplinary rehab programme?

Am delighted to hear Minisign AR went well (shame to be relieved that there isn't 'too much, too good' progress reported at a meeting, but I am)

AYC and moose, what gorgeously cute doggies. Summer, I like the cat name, many years back I knew someones Persian Blue... called Blue.

Ouryve, apart from general oppositional stuff, could the shoes be bothering him? It's crocs/flip flop season, and still wellies weather.

Off for an early night myself!

PolterGoose Fri 04-Apr-14 22:44:09

Maria OT wasn't sure they'd accept referral, ds isn't their usual profile, reason being ds's extreme sensory issues mean usual techniques unlikely to work. Which is probably true, I'd just like them to try. It's on my after-final assignment, after-Easter to do list to chase it up.

ouryve Fri 04-Apr-14 23:22:54

polter he is and it's mostly alphablocks stuff, still, but he is learning some new stuff at school and he's very patient with me when I break from his script grin It might be years before he moves beyond just spelling words because it's fun, but it's a good foundation to build on.

DS1 had NHS OT running off into the sunset, btw.

DS1 does that sort of thing, moose!

Happy birthday to your DD2, AYC!cakecakecake BigPuppy is adorable, btw!

NHMW Your poor kids - it's heartbreaking that they're both in such a distressed state. How are you coping?

hazey hope you practised the nod and smile in advance.

Hope you have a good (if short) sleep, summer

Maria tried crocs - if he'll put them on, they get handed to me out of the back of the buggy before we get to the end of the terrace. Have crocs wellies, as they're so supportive for bendy feet compared with normal and not the least bit heavy. Whether he will put them on is random and whether he'll keep them on is random again. One of the problems is, once he does something once, he's already established a pattern. At least I can bring the buggy to the back door, when it's wet, even though I'd rather walk him across the back lane to the garage. Even as a baby, he hated stuff on his feet.

Ahem. I am not 44 either, so piss off with your youth. I'll be forty flipping nine later this month. envy

ouryve Fri 04-Apr-14 23:50:15

Old and wise grin

(It's my half birthday, next week. How could i forget? I'll be 44 1/2)

homework Fri 04-Apr-14 23:55:07

Hi everyone , been busy , sorting out going to london tomorrow and Ipswich on Sunday . Managed to arrange train tickets , hotels , sorted printing out details and direction on how to get to various places,

We going to do mostly history stuff on the Cold War.
Packed and ironed stuff for two of us for long weekend , then it's down to the books .

Hope everyone has a nice few days too , with holidays starting , no pressure from schools .

Has anyone heard from hugs this evening is she alright .

Up for early train tomorrow , so most get to bed now or I'll be knackered.

homework Fri 04-Apr-14 23:58:05

My puppy except he's five now

NoHaudinMaWheest Sat 05-Apr-14 00:02:59

Hazey hope you get to the right person in the end and that dental work is not too traumatic. Ds was a large consumer of chocolate buttons. At 2-3 his breakfast was chocolate buttons (6) and grapes, absolutely refused to eat anything else for breakfast. Now however he is quite adaptable. In fact he told me yesterday that I should start making different things as our meals were getting boring!

Maria a combination of physio, hydro (which she is already getting) and psychotherapy is the current plan but psychiatrist wants to see her before she starts psychotherapy and he can't (apparently) until 1 May. Psychotherapist is now on holiday until after Easter.

Ouryve I'm pretty exhausted. Today was tough. Ds was stuck on the loo overnight until about 3.30pm which means constant monitoring and encouragement to get off. DD needs me in order to eat,wash, dress, go to the loo, press the TV remote and on top of that she has a cold so I also need to wipe her nose. Also had a large Sainsbury's order to put away. I didn't manage to get round to doing the maths work with her I planned. She is very resilant but naturally bored and frustrated.

Ellen you're still young. I'm nearing the middle of the next decade.

The kids keep you young, NoHaudin. (Yeah, right!) Sounds tough at the moment, hope you are looking after yourself occasionally.

homework Sat 05-Apr-14 00:15:51

Nohaudin sorry you and your family are having such a terrible time . Is there no way you can get an earlier appointment. Do you think or feel that these interventions will help your daughter.

Homework, I thought you were having an early night? Off to bed with you. Have fun in London and Ipswich. smile

homework Sat 05-Apr-14 00:40:48

Ellen , I use to hate history , especially in school . Can never remember dates and places , people . Do enjoy reading some of the personal stories , this is bit I find interesting .
Here's hoping it improves his grades , need to work on punctuation , this is wrote throughout all his books that have come home for revision for the holidays .
It's going to be a hard two weeks , nice long weekend though . Need museum ideas for Monday , tomorrow Bletchley park . Sunday is raf bentwaters . So that leaves Monday to organise .

SummerRain Sat 05-Apr-14 03:56:59

This is not an ok time to be getting up. At all sad

Homework, have a lovely weekend.

autumnsmum Sat 05-Apr-14 08:23:46

Hazey that story about the buttons is brilliant . No haudin sorry things are so tough. Ds has been winding dd2 up constantly

moosemama Sat 05-Apr-14 08:48:22

NoHaudin flowers I'm surprised your still standing with all that going on. It's impossible to pace when your life revolves around the needs of your dcs, but you do have to try and take care of yourself too. I really understand how hard it is to try and get a balance though.

I have a poorly puppy. He had us up to let him out at 2.30, 5.00 and 6.00, when I gave in and got up for the day. So I am really bleary eyed and just a touch grumpy this morning.

Dh has gone with ds2 to see if he can retrieve his backpack from the station where the guard left it last night and dd and I have been watching the new episodes of Fireman Sam together - me in my pjs and her in her snowsuit! hmm She was just seeing if it still fits, but then decided she didn't want to take it off. grin

Dh cleared the hall stairs and landing yesterday and it seems so big and echoey now. We really need to do something about the amount of coats we seem to have accumulated - well I say we - I mean dh. We counted 10 different coats belonging to him last night! shock I have two - a winter padded one and a lightweight raincoat. New rule - 1 coat each in the hall, the rest in wardrobes/bedrooms and dh is having a coat cull. Same with shoes, school shoes only in the hall during the week, trainers in wardrobe and wellies in back porch. Hopefully that will help to stop our house giving the impression the Clampits live here as soon as you open the front door. hmm

So, decorating today. Dh and I actually agreed on a colour immediately and we've also agreed on some artwork for the wall. Very odd, we've been together for 27 years and have never agreed on decor before. shock

autumnsmum Sat 05-Apr-14 09:00:45

Moose the clampits live in my flat I have to hide outgrown shoes that belong to dd2 or she try's to force her foot into them in the manner of Cinderellas stepsisters

moosemama Sat 05-Apr-14 09:08:41

autumn, dd does that. She can't bear growing out of her shoes - she gets very attached to them. I can see her being Imelda Marcos the second - shoe wise - when she's an adult.

Ds1 always tries to wear his school shoes, no matter what he's wearing or where we're going. Walk in the muddy woods - nice pair of slightly scruffy slip on Kickers, hike across the fields - the Kickers again, joggers and a sweatshirt for doing a school fun-run - why slip on the Kickers of course. hmm

Ds2 is more discerning - he just wants to wear his bright red, patent, British Knights for absolutely everything. grin

ouryve Sat 05-Apr-14 10:04:42

If i don't lock away outgrown or out of season shoes they all end up in the living room! Yes the boy who hates wearing shoes to go out still likes to hoard them

autumnsmum Sat 05-Apr-14 10:20:40

Great dp has got into a row with our neighbours about the children's moise

hazeyjane Sat 05-Apr-14 11:41:02

Ha ha, dd2 has just gone to a party squeezed into a pair of purple dms with snowflakes on them, which she wore to ate last year, she refuses to believe that she can't wear them.....'they are fine mama, My toes just have to scrunch up a bit....'

That sounds grim, Autumn, was it a row about their children's noise or yours?

I sometimes worry about the fact that I seem to have the noisiest children on the planet.

autumnsmum Sat 05-Apr-14 12:32:56

It was about the children's noise dp has explained the younger two are autistic and we don't let them in the garden early

bochead Sat 05-Apr-14 12:43:36
autumnsmum Sat 05-Apr-14 12:49:00

Dp and I are both really quiet as well

Kleinzeit Sat 05-Apr-14 13:45:55

I’m just back from shopping for clothes for DS(15, Asperger’s Syndrome). I’m knackered. Well we both are. Thank Gawd for the Internet but it wont do for shoes, or for trousers until he stops growing.

Now I just want a large gin but DH is away so I have the rest of the day to get through first!

CoolCadbury Sat 05-Apr-14 18:54:35

Hi, can I come in and join you folks?

hazeyjane Sat 05-Apr-14 18:59:41

Of course you can CoolCadbury smile wine for you.

[gin] for you kleinzeit.

despite weird misty weather, have spent most of day outdoors building a fire with dcs, then wrapping up in blankets, eating hot cross buns and watching scooby doo.

ds insisted on choosing his own trousers today, which unfortunately was a pair of pj bottoms with cartoon lions on them- hope this doesn't become a daily occurence!

CoolCadbury Sat 05-Apr-14 19:20:12

Thanks, hazeyjane.

I remember when my DS only wanted to wear his pj bottoms. They were red and white bold big stripes with an overprint of dogs all over them. Talk about clashing colours --who designs this stuff and why did I buy them?--Eventually he moved onto some other hideous combination. grin

DS attended his best friends party today. He had quite a nice time. Only 2 crying/tantrum sessions. smile Unfortunately, I had not prepared my brain for the party and how DS would mostly likely react so it came as a bit of a shock. I felt embarrassed by it, which I hate feeling, but managed to get my head into the right frame of mind and quickly sort out the issues.

CoolCadbury Sat 05-Apr-14 19:25:44

or rather my friend sorted one of the issues quickly!

Faverolles Sat 05-Apr-14 19:37:49

Is it ok if I join in?
I'm a bit crap at conversation but I'm good at lurking smile
I have 4 dc. Ds2 is highly suspected to have AS.

hazeyjane Sat 05-Apr-14 20:00:48

These are the pjs - it was quite an outfit! <please ignore dangerous saw next to ds>

Hello Faverolles, I spend more time reading Goose and Carrot than posting, it is a nice place to lurksmile

I have 3 dcs, ds who is nearly 4 has a genetic condition, with Global Developmental Delay, low muscle tone, sensory issues and health issues.

PolterGoose Sat 05-Apr-14 20:08:10

Kleinzeit must be wine time?

Hello Cool the party sounds like a success to me smile

hazey that sounds like a lovely day, ds had a pair of stripy fleece trousers which he wore from around 2 until I finally convinced him they really were too small when he was 5, but he couldn't bear to part with them so I stuffed them, sewed up the waist and leg holes and attached eyes grin

Lovely to see you here Fav, don't ever feel you need to keep up and it's quite normal for conversation in here to do sharp turns.

Well, I've got 3300 words done, not quite in the right order but they are words, lots of tidying up of it tomorrow and 3 little sections and I'm done, at last, ds has called it the infinite course grin

Ds had a lovely day, after one of our koi had a mishap last week him and dp went and bought 2 new ones and some weed for the tadpoles and he went on a woodlouse and millipede hunt in the garden. I found and trapped an ichneumon wasp which impressed him hugely meaning I am now elevated to being an 'awesome mother' <smug>

PolterGoose Sat 05-Apr-14 20:09:33

hazey lovely photo, such a cutey smile

AtYourCervix Sat 05-Apr-14 20:18:02

evening all.

hazey - your DS is so cute!

I'm having a very pleasant evening with DD2!!!shock

I have wine she has cherryade. It is all very nice. !!!!shock shock!!!!!!!!

She really must do some revision this week. That'll ruin things.

CoolCadbury Sat 05-Apr-14 20:31:38

hazey your DS is very cute, look at his chubby cheeks grin

polter what is an ichneumon wasp - I am impressed that you can tell the different types! Only thing I know about wasps is that they were in the short tree of our previous house right outside the front door and then we had some living in our roof space in our current house (I swear they followed us). I am convinced that we have birds living in our roof space now.

moosemama Sat 05-Apr-14 20:37:50

Hi and welcome Kleinzeit, Cool and Faverolles. I am a sporadic poster. I come on post far too much, waffle on for ages then disappear for a few days. blush

Hazey, you are so good at thinking of great things to do with your dcs. I wish I could come up with something better than walking the dogs or milkshakes at the local garden centre - although the latter does tend to give me godlike status for all of five minutes.

Ds1 still has a pair of trousers that were long, soft, bamboo wide legs when he was about two, but he now wears as shorts. There was a time when I couldn't get him to wear anything else, but these days it's pjs for preference and then anything as long as it has a soft/knitted waistband. Just bought him the next three sizes in soft-waisted jeans as I'm paranoid they'll go out of fashion and he'll refuse to wear anything but his pjs.

I am in the bad books with dh for not being impressed with his paintwork. I did explain that it's not his handiwork, it's the fact that the walls need replastering and we couldn't afford it so instead have had to do a fill/sand and paint over job. It needs another coat as well and we've yet to do the woodwork, so I'm sure it will come together, but he and my SDad got me into the hall for the great reveal after the first coat and I couldn't help looking a little disappointed (I didn't say anything, but got into trouble anyway).

He got his bag, complete with laptop back - you'd think he'd be ecstatic, but no ... he's Mr Grumpy from Grumpsville this evening. DIY always does that to him and me not leaping for joy and gushing about how gorgeous it looks seems to have been the final nail in the coffin.

Didn't open a bottle of wine last night, but am seriously tempted now.

PolterGoose Sat 05-Apr-14 20:38:30

It was a bit like this, I had no idea what it was, but it looked odd enough that ds would want to see it. He identified it and said it was the first he'd ever seen, had desperately wanted to see one in real life, that they are a gardener's friend as they parasitise caterpillars and they can't sting because they are solitary wasps so need their ovipositor. And I've pretty much repeated his monologue blush

signandsingcarols Sat 05-Apr-14 20:50:56

poulter very impressed! grin (if you are up this way we have every david attenborough dvd set and a few more beside, if yr ds doesn't have them already you are very wqelcome to borrow.)

na haudin... sad so sorry things have got so bad.

PolterGoose Sat 05-Apr-14 20:56:17

That's very kind sign but we have them all too, plus numerous other DVD documentaries grin

Swansinflight Sat 05-Apr-14 21:07:41

Just signing in and buying a round... Evening all.

Nohaudin so sorry to hear your DD is struggling so badly. I do hope you get some sense out of the professionals sometime soon.

Ourvye it's great that your DS has his new school on the horizon, hope the assessment visits and everything go well.

We are in midst of the EHC assessment process for DS, so far, so surprisingly efficient. Although the holistic multidisciplinary bit appears to consist of asking CAMHS to attend the meeting, and them not turning up ... But... The documentation our LA have decided to use is a very good rounded picture of DS needs, and we seem to be on a positive track with lots of people talking about support we may get. Proof of the pudding will of course be in the eating, or rather in the panel which meets end of April smile

DS absolutely amazed me by being in his school production of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - singing, dancing, the lot, and loving it! he even had his face painted, although I fear we only just got away with that as he was scratching his face by the curtain call and had red visible scratches afterwards ... Was quite glad he'd been poorly and missed the dress rehearsal as I wonder whether he'd have gone for it twice!

I was rather sniffly at a whole load of 8 year olds including DS singing 'I can do anything ... If I just believe in me'. Made the mistake of saying it to DS who remarked that 'it was a silly song because you cannot do anything if you just believe, for instance you cannot just walk off a cliff and not die. unless you are a spider'.

I think Mr Literal Minded missed the point there grin

PolterGoose Sat 05-Apr-14 21:18:53

Swans grin at literal thinking, it can be wearing, but is often very funny.

youarewinning Sat 05-Apr-14 21:20:05

Hey all. Sorry I've not been around and commented but I have read and digested.

We visited friends this afternoon. DS went swimming with them for an hour. He also did quite well playing and doing a play with them. (Well he did the scenery/ props) and mostly just watched from sidelines! I let him take his iPad as friends DDs have one and both have iPhones so they do tend to play for a bit. I also just let DS play if I think he needs time out or he asks. Then I get him to play again for a bit. This seems to work well and it's my best friend who is very understanding.

Swansinflight Sat 05-Apr-14 21:39:06

Oops, name change complete fail - trying to post under a different name on another board, for confidentiality.

aka thepoodoctor. However now I've so comprehensively buggered it up think I will choose another name for the confidential board!

I think Swans is a much preferable abbreviation to the inevitable of the previous!

Swansinflight Sat 05-Apr-14 21:40:27

Youare, that's great, sounds like he did brilliantly. So many threads on here make me feel incredibly self conscious about letting DS have the tech stuff in public, but I think sometimes it's just what they need to cope with everything else!

hazeyjane Sat 05-Apr-14 21:45:27

WAH!!!! Polter, wtf is that??? I have nightmares about such creatures!!!

I am crap at arguments, and have got myself caught up in this.

PolterGoose Sat 05-Apr-14 22:00:05

Well done mini-youare smile

Kleinzeit Sat 05-Apr-14 22:51:44

Shopping for clothes just stresses DS out so much, and then I get stressed too. He hates having to choose anything, or try things on. The shoes weren't too bad because we could just get the same style in a bigger size, but he likes shorts with button-elastic waistbands and they don't seem to make those in men's sizes. And he hates having to ask shop assistants for anything like where the changing room is and he even hates it when I ask the shop assistant and by the end we both just want to murder each other! But we had a cup of tea and some chocolate this afternoon and forgave each other smile

Been out dancing this evening yay! DS attached to computer meanwhile.

Thank you for the [gin] polter and well done with all those words [admire]

I mostly lurk too! Nice reading what everyone's up to.

MariaNearlyEaster Sun 06-Apr-14 01:21:13

Evening peeps. Need a favour. Could someone start a thread for me, asking for advice about a telephone 'directions' hearing? Don't want to out myself to la, but I need info, and know some regulars have had one before. thanks thanks and have a wine on me. Or hot choc brew with cream & marshmallows for anyone not drinking tonight.

MariaNearlyEaster Sun 06-Apr-14 01:35:54

Kleinziet, you can just add elastic inside most normal shorts waistbands. Or even sew a casing to the shorts if need be. Here

signandsingcarols Sun 06-Apr-14 08:01:15

ds went to party yesterday, managed 50 mins, sad but that was 30 mins bouncing and 15 mins eating, so he had fun grin and we left before the 'crash'.

weirdly enough he was one of the best behaved... (it was big hall with bouncy castle and disco and the kids were running wild, and being really rough with each other,) as ds was just enjoying the bouncing and knew he had to be careful not to bounce on someone he was fab grin althou I caught a couple of boys in his class whispering and giving him 'looks' when he had retreated to my lap for a cuddle and a hide when it all got too much.. sad angry

I looked them straight in the eye and said 'was there something you wanted to say XXX? or you YYYY?' and they looked shifty and said no... grin grin, it's sad cos one is the son of a really good friend, but i realised yesterday altho I love her to bits, I don't actually like her son... it's that sort of 'I will poke you, and if you retaliate I will make sure you get the blame,' IYSWIM... sad

PolterGoose Sun 06-Apr-14 08:08:48

Totally get what you mean sign it's that insidious somewhat manipulative behaviour that proper bullies show, it's horribly sad. So glad ds had fun grin

CoolCadbury Sun 06-Apr-14 08:20:02

sign I'm really impressed that your DS did so well at the party - I think it would have been too much for me, never mind the DS! grin Well done on pulling the boys up. There's a boy in one of the classes I teach, who I suspect has ASD, and there are 3 other boys who try to wind him up something rotten, but in the classroom they don't get the chance when Miss CoolCadbury is about. grin

youarewinning Sun 06-Apr-14 08:24:36

Sign - glad your DS had fun. Sounds like he did really well - especially recognising his need and seeking a cuddle when he needed it. I love your attitude to the other children. Something else for me to adopt!

hazeyjane Sun 06-Apr-14 08:55:10

Well done to your boy, Sign.

How is everyone feeling about the impending Easter holidays?....

PolterGoose Sun 06-Apr-14 14:02:10

This round is on me grin

I have submitted my final piece for my Masters and now just have to wait. I really and truly cannot believe I've stuck with it. What a relief.

bochead Sun 06-Apr-14 15:22:24

Go girl! You must have a real sense of achievement!

I had kittens about doing my very first assignment last month, but now just have to slog away till the bitter end in around 18 months time. Tis not easy to engage brain after so many years away from education.

DS's online school broke up last week and goes back next - it feels VERY strange & wrong, so we've agreed to keep on with edumacational stuff next week and then have a couple of long weekends when everyone else does - particularly over Easter weekend! Monday morning will be a trip to the library to pick up the books on hatching chicks he's reserved.

PolterGoose Sun 06-Apr-14 15:35:40

Thanks boc and good luck with your course.

I'm working my usual days over Easter but dp and ds have got zoo and in-law plans so hopefully on my days off me and ds can just potter.

MariaNearlyEaster Sun 06-Apr-14 16:17:09

Polter you're all done grin

You might like this now

autumnsmum Sun 06-Apr-14 16:26:59

Well done polter

PolterGoose Sun 06-Apr-14 16:35:37

Maria grin it's been a slog, but I've learned loads and become even more cynical.

Thanks autumns how's dd2?

autumnsmum Sun 06-Apr-14 16:41:52

Much better thank you polter

autumnsmum Sun 06-Apr-14 17:08:34

She has been quite physical in the last few days turning our faces to things and climbing on us a lot

Swansinflight Sun 06-Apr-14 18:03:07

Amazing Polter! Well done smile

PolterGoose Sun 06-Apr-14 19:10:16

Thanks Swans smile

autumnsmum you have an almost doppelgänger, only one letter difference, look here shock

autumnsmum Sun 06-Apr-14 19:49:00

How can this be ? I am the mum of the one and only autumn!

CoolCadbury Sun 06-Apr-14 21:31:20

Well done, Polter. Can I ask what the masters was in?

PolterGoose Sun 06-Apr-14 21:41:35

Thanks Cool it's forensic psychology and criminology smile

youarewinning Sun 06-Apr-14 22:01:11

Well done polter wine

PolterGoose Sun 06-Apr-14 22:02:25

Thanks youare I just have to hope I've passed, but right now that doesn't matter, it's done.

ouryve Mon 07-Apr-14 08:03:45

Well done polter [balloons]!

Going to be a long 2 weeks. Every surface is covered with things with price labels on. DH had to "buy" his own trousers for £30, this morning. Just had to shoplift a coaster for my coffee.

PolterGoose Mon 07-Apr-14 08:04:33

ouryve grin

hazeyjane Mon 07-Apr-14 09:19:32

Polter, I am even more convinced that you are the G&C very own Temperance Brennan - well done.

I spent yesterday afternoon, being a rock under a duvet whilst dh and ds had a nerf gun battle (dh fires, ds loads)

Then ds and dd2 (who was being a mermaid) discovered my wool stash and created a tangle of wool which is the stuff of nightmares - ds particularly has discovered the cat like joy of rolling on his bag twiddling wool.

Insanely I have arranged for a friend of dd1s to come around at 9.30, I've set the table up with a ton of cupcakes, icing and sprinkles and will set them loose when she gets here.

I figure the rest of the holidays can go downhill from there.

moosemama Mon 07-Apr-14 09:33:56

Congratulations on finishing your Masters Polter! grin Fascinating subject.

Well, I found out why ds1 was all over the place on Friday. He's come down with the throat thing and is not at all happy about it. It's been an interesting weekend as he hates it when we decorate anyway, but because we were doing hall/stairs/landing he couldn't move freely between his bedroom and the downstairs and that, apparently, was the end of the world. He told dh that the ladders being on the landing were making him ill and he couldn't bear to look at them.

Unfortunately, as is usual with this house, the job turned out to be much bigger than expected, with a lot more prep and remedial work required to fix over 40 years of my dad's bodge jobs and we are barely half done. So I am off to do some more rollering in a minute and praying it doesn't knacker me too much as I such a lot to get through this week.

It's ds1's birthday on Thursday, (12 years old - how did that happen? shock ) so have to bake a gf lemon drizzle cake and an enormous macaroni cheese for that, then have his blooming Ender Dragon cake to make for when his new best friend comes for the afternoon on Sunday - and that's without cleaning the place top to bottom and looking after a very clingy, needy ds1. Oh - and of course school gave us less than a week's notice that they are doing an Easter Bonnet parade, so I have to get that done with dd and spend an afternoon at the school as well. Fortunately I was suspicious and bought a straw hat in just in case.

I was supposed to be painting the woodwork in the toilet room (it's t&g pannelled) this week too - but I'm pretty sure that's an impossible ask now.

What I want to do is go and hide under my duvet and come out again next Monday! grin

moosemama Mon 07-Apr-14 09:35:16

Just realised, lots of your dcs have already broken up. Only ds1 has broken up here and he gets three weeks. The other two don't break up until Friday thank heavens.

autumnsmum Mon 07-Apr-14 09:38:12

Well today started with the battle of milkshake channel 5 vs xbox ! Dd2 has worked out how to switch the xbox off which while it is something I have often longed to do it doesn't endear her to ds

Fishandjam Mon 07-Apr-14 10:02:13

I know it's early but can I have a gin? (In here, not RL!) DS aged 4 and newly diagnosed with mild ASD is driving me spare, not least because he's suddenly started weeing his pants after being dry for almost a year. It's bad enough dealing with the constant poo accidents without adding pee to the mix too! <and breathe>

moosemama Mon 07-Apr-14 10:05:52

Oh dear autumn brew

[virtual gin] for Fishandjam. Sorry you are having such a hard time. flowers

Right, am sallying forth with paint roller in hand ...

CoolCadbury Mon 07-Apr-14 10:22:38

Slept badly last night, so feeling really tired. Weather isn't helping. It's me and DS all day. I was going to take him to the cinema but the show started at 10 am confused - we are not even out of our pjs yet grin! Next showing is not till 4pm and that's way too late. I might suggest a snuggle on the sofa and a DVD, which might keep him occupied for 30 mins before he gets bored.

What do you do when you don't have the energy to cope with an energetic DC? smile

ouryve Mon 07-Apr-14 10:27:39

Not the wool stash, hazey! shock

This morning, I have baked Flat Rascals. The dough turned out a little wet, as the battery in my scales died partway through measuring the second lot of flour straight into the first. Still delicious, though!

I expect them to have a price sticky taped to them, any moment, now grin

CoolCadbury Mon 07-Apr-14 10:31:24

Yum, ouryve. How much are they going for? grin

ouryve Mon 07-Apr-14 10:33:16

Probably 17p for the lot. His pricing is a bit wayward.

Galena Mon 07-Apr-14 10:35:21

Sorry, this is going to be a woe is me post. come away on holiday and DD is throwing up so we are pretty much confined to her room. she slept ok but was sick this morning. I reckon it's just gunk from her cold. she has no energy though and I barely slept for listening out for her. dad has his bypass surgery today, all being well, so a bit nervous about that too. ugh.

autumnsmum Mon 07-Apr-14 10:40:52

Oh galena hugs hope dd gets better and the surgery goes well

ouryve Mon 07-Apr-14 11:09:33

Oh, Galena sadbrew

Hope your DD gets well enough for you to enjoy some of your holiday. Good thoughts for your dad.

Swansinflight Mon 07-Apr-14 12:53:07

Galena, hope your DD feels better soon and very best wishes for your Dads surgery.

Enjoying tales of baking! Ourvye I didn't know you could make fat or flat rascals outside of Betty's tea shops - I may nag for a recipe and then we could eat them much more often than budget allows. Moose, Ender Dragon cake, wow! DS wanted an Ender dragon toy until I pointed out it was 2 foot long and 45 quid so not going to happen smile

Very volatile weekend with DS who has also broken up for Easter. He has a new bike which he adores, which is great. Sharing the same universe as his sister- less good. VeryDH has them both today while I'm holed up in a very peaceful Uni office. I will return with gin later I think!

ouryve Mon 07-Apr-14 13:31:25

They're just rock buns, Swans! Loads of very similar mrecipes online though all say dried mixed fruit, when it's just currants and peel in the bettys ones!

Nodding at the issue of sharing a universe with a sibling. All been relatively peaceful, so far, if a little messy (bits of paper and crumbs now temporarily removed from the floor)

The growth of the shop continues. I keep having to brush it back, a bit. I've banned him from using the sofas, our Laura Ashley console and my towel pile as display areas grin

Sheneverdid Mon 07-Apr-14 13:46:22

Hello! Hope everyone is OK?

Can anyone help this lady, I would suggest she re-posts but she's written a fair bit already. smile

moosemama Mon 07-Apr-14 13:54:57

Swans it sounds like an impressive cake, but I still have absolutely no idea how I'm going to approach it. I've now asked ds to help me design it, as at least that way I'll get some idea of what his expectations are like.

I've seen that Ender Dragon toy - it was over £100 on the site I saw it on! shock

Ds1 also has huge issues sharing the same universe as his dd. So sad really, as he idolised her and her him when she was a baby/toddler. Then she grew up, started speaking and God-forbid, having opinions and disagreeing with him and it was all downhill from there. hmm

I have managed to get a second coat of paint of 3 out of the 4 walls as high as I can get without using a ladder - don't think ladders, stairs and me mix very well. Quite pleased with myself, but beyond knackered ... and my ILs turned up unnannounced in the middle of it, with us with all our coats and shoes piled on the living room floor and no housework done since Friday. hmm

ouryve Mon 07-Apr-14 14:06:55

If they don't like it, moose they can always muck in grin

DS2 doesn't even express all that many opinions grin though he does know when DS1's saying unkind things about him and points at him.

Though DS1 was grumbling at him for saying nuh-uhhh noises (one I've taught him, and which he understands better than me saying "no DS2, I am not going to read out that made up word/read every single icon on your tablet/sound out those letters for the 50th time today") and saying "boo!", yesterday morning.

Fishandjam Mon 07-Apr-14 14:11:04

That's an interesting thread shenever. I've no advice as I'm too new to all this myself, but I'll watch with interest. I suspect that's going to be DS's big area of struggle.

Kleinzeit Mon 07-Apr-14 14:38:07

Thank you maria for suggesting sewing elastic in myself – great idea! So now I know roughly what DS wants and today I went out by myself and bought him a pair of shorts….. got home and gave them to him to try on and he says they’re a bit big but he’ll wear them with a belt. I am not allowed to see when he tries things on, so who knows how it will turn out but I am making a resolution not to care.

I can’t see 44 from here, it was so long ago….

PolterGoose Mon 07-Apr-14 15:28:05

brew and cake all round I think.

Been to work, now back, ds quite chilled smile

hazeyjane Mon 07-Apr-14 15:43:43

Oh. My. God.

trashed house
3 sets of waterproofs caked in mud to be washed
mud all over the kitchen floor
bag of maltesers stolen from cupboard and sneaked upstairs (half of them crunched into floor)
dd1's friend sent home with biro on her new jumper, no knickers on (got wet from slipping up in mud) mud all over pretty boden waterproof
and I was thinking as she left 'hmm, xxxx doesn't seem like the nail polish wearing sort'
....just discovered dd2 had cracked open my one and only bottle of deep chocolate nail polish and set up her own bloody nail bar.

I am NEVER having a playdate again.

PolterGoose Mon 07-Apr-14 16:03:59

shock hazey [gin]?

autumnsmum Mon 07-Apr-14 16:14:11

Hazey kraken rum coming in your directipn

hazeyjane Mon 07-Apr-14 16:16:11

I was thinking some sort of horse tranquiliser.

Swansinflight Mon 07-Apr-14 17:26:55

brew horse tranquilliser ...

Sounds like a good time was had by all!

Just off to see how the universe sharing has panned out. Had an email through from ocado for £9 of a litre of gin, they must be psychic.

SummerRain Mon 07-Apr-14 18:30:14

I'm home! No Internet reception in the arse end of donegal and I've missed you guys grin

My kids haven't seen me since Friday and ds2 hasn't even acknowledged me yet, Ds1 just wandered past and acted like I'd just been gone to the shop. Only dd seemed pleased to see me hmm gotta love asd, you really feel special in a house with aspies don't you? confused

Off to catch up on the thread now...

Galena Mon 07-Apr-14 18:37:10

Dad's op went well. Double bypass, all successful, in ICU and sedated still as expected. Mum going to see him tomorrow. Puky child's temp reached 39.8 (pretty normal for her when she has a temp) but it has come down a bit with ibuprofen. Now it's down she's a bit perkier.

homework Mon 07-Apr-14 18:37:58

Hi , sorry to hear about everyone who had rotten weekend .

Galena , hope your dad op goes well , and your little one feeling better soon .

Polter I would love to do course around those topics myself . More of the scientific side .

We had a nice few days away , knackered , spent small fortune on few days , London not cheap . Cold War museum was really good and people who run it very informative , in fact one man who was a sergeant there during that time was explaining loads stuff to us . He gave me his email address if we get questions on test paper that he can help with.

Having rest of night to relax and hit school books for few hours tomorrow.

PolterGoose Mon 07-Apr-14 18:43:45

Galena glad dad's op went well, hope dd gets well soon flowers

SummerRain Mon 07-Apr-14 19:05:50

Galena flowers Glad it all went well for your dad, I hope he has a speedy recovery

ouryve Mon 07-Apr-14 19:05:56

Sounds like a fun day, Hazey [allthechocolate]

Great news, Galena. Hope he makes a smooth recovery.

We're slowly beating back the shop to a more manageable level of sprawl. DS1 asked for his checkout and I told him that I'm not going to get it out while there's quite so much mess, because it's getting in everyone else's way. DS2 has been periodically ripping price tags off all his toys, this afternoon. I'm seriously hoping that DS1 never discovers the existence of dymo!

And I'm in for a world of hurt. I've taught DS2 how to use the touchpad on my laptop. He still can't use a spoon, but this took all of a minute - just took a few attempts to master the double tap. The boy knows his priorities!

ouryve Mon 07-Apr-14 19:07:33

Kleinzeit if he finds it more comfortable, he could perhaps try an elasticated snake belt or similar?

ouryve Mon 07-Apr-14 19:11:20
PolterGoose Mon 07-Apr-14 19:11:41

ouryve I remember my little brother cataloging all the books and Dymo'ing everything grin and loving hearing about your ds2's development, its lovely smile

ouryve Mon 07-Apr-14 19:31:37

His communication is coming on in leaps and bounds - non-verbal included. He slammed something down in a huff, yesterday. It was excellent (and we laughed rather a lot)

PolterGoose Mon 07-Apr-14 19:34:56

Fantastic grin

Swansinflight Mon 07-Apr-14 19:59:18

Fantastic Galena. thanks really hope he has a smooth recovery from here. Also hope mini Galena is over her bug soon. Not good timing!

Ourvye that sounds like a very useful life skill. I have trouble with that bloody double tap - or now we have an iPad I occasionally sit there banging the screen wondering why it isn't doing anything smile So he's definitely on a winner there!

autumnsmum Mon 07-Apr-14 20:04:57

Oh dear bad evening with dd2 she started dropping off on the sofa so I lifted her up to put her in the bedroom and I got hit and pinched when these outbursts come there awful . Tbh I feel really embaressed admitting to them

PolterGoose Mon 07-Apr-14 20:06:55

autumns I get attacked regularly, probably daily, to varying degrees, don't be embarrassed flowers

autumnsmum Mon 07-Apr-14 20:10:30

The thing that scares me polter is dd2 is four the thought of dealing with that behaviour from a pmt ridden 14 year is really scary

moosemama Mon 07-Apr-14 20:31:39

autumn please don't feel embarrassed, there are plenty of us here that completely understand and have been through or are going through similar. flowers

I don't know about how other people handle it, but personally I would try not to think about that far into the future. So much can change between now and then that what we think it might be like is really just fortune telling. She's only 4, plenty of time for her to learn and develop. ((hug))

ouryve Mon 07-Apr-14 20:41:23

You're far from alone, here, autumn

I rarely get hit in pure anger (DS2's slaps usually happen when he forgets other ways of communicating and, at other times, serve a sensory purpose) but I have things thrown at me by my 10yo. We replaced some internal doors about 18 months ago when we discovered that the old ones didn't have safety glass in (the messy way) and the new ones already have dents in where I ducked in time. I've become a lot better at taking it in my stride, which is by far the best way of taking the heat out of the situation.

Did you see and bookmark the challenging behaviour links I unearthed? That fact that they exist at all is a pretty good indicator that it's not just you and that there's nothing to be embarrassed about flowers

hazeyjane Mon 07-Apr-14 20:41:59

More ((hugs)) here, Autumnsmum. It is horrible. Ds looks like such a little cherub, but when he goes he lashes out he is like a little wolverine - pinching is the pulling, hitting, kicking, biting then he will start hitting himself. The other day he gouged dd2's eye and it was sore and red for the rest of the day. It frightens me, it is already hard to deal with at 16 kg, I fear what happens as he grows bigger. He is definitely worse when he is sleepy, or woken up,I guess they are disorientated and feel vulnerable so it is almost like a survival instinct.

ouryve Mon 07-Apr-14 20:44:08

And now I have rosemary envy. Half watching Mary berry and there's enormous rosemary bushes. Too cold for it, up here.

autumnsmum Mon 07-Apr-14 20:48:49

Thank you all so , so much thinking logically dd2 is four with autism and cognitive impairment , she is also just over chickenpox and had clearly got overtired , plus her routine has been thrown by the school holidays.

signandsingcarols Mon 07-Apr-14 20:49:53

Galena hope dad yr continues to improve..

Autumn,, thanks hugs,

hazey that sounds like a play date from hell, wine wine

Poulter yay! well done for finishing, wine I am in awe of your persistance... (and just starting to think about starting my own masters journey... M Ed).

PolterGoose Mon 07-Apr-14 21:00:55

Just tonight ds punched me twice because I dared to sing a little ditty ("we're going to the zoo zoo zoo") because him and dp are off to Paignton zoo tomorrow. I asked why he punched me and he told me because he hates that song, I reminded him to use words to communicate. I've said it before but thank goodness for floppy joints so he doesn't hurt much.

PolterGoose Mon 07-Apr-14 21:01:53

Thanks sign, it's not over until I get the results but it feels done. I thought you already had a masters?

CoolCadbury Mon 07-Apr-14 21:22:07

galena glad to hear that the surgery went well.

autumn thanks

ouryve yup! was watching Mary Berry too. Herbs and summer fruits. I like watching it because it's so relaxing.

DS and I managed to entertain ourselves today, without either of us getting grumpy. He is being especially clingy for a few weeks now. He wants me to stay with him while he goes off to sleep but I can't even do it once, otherwise it becomes a routine. hmm

He is also very scared of going into different rooms by himself or being left on his own downstairs if I am upstairs or vice versa. I tell him that our house is a safe place and there is nothing to be scared of but he says he has "bad thoughts." sad. I know it's anxiety based but it is hard work.

Swansinflight Mon 07-Apr-14 21:22:13

Autumn you mustn't feel embarrassed. DS, nearly 8, has some pretty horrid outbursts too which I absolutely hate admitting to with anyone. Also find the professionals are mega unhelpful when I do. Apparently I need to tell him he's experiencing a time hole connected with his past trauma and all will be well [hmmm] This was contained in a leaflet entitled 'Sudden inexplicable negative behaviour'.

I think patience and calmness do make an impact. DS has made quite a lot of progress lately in moving from the physical to the verbal. Strangely enough I find the verbals more distressing but it is in fact progress. Are you a Ross Greene reader? Might be worth it - he talks about identifying the situations in which kids explode, and unsung ways of solving them.he does also discuss how to work it with kids who have limited capacity to express themselves verbally (am I right this applies to your DD? Sorry if not).

Chocolate and hugs.

autumnsmum Mon 07-Apr-14 21:28:38

Swans in that's very useful thank you . Dd2 is verbal but her autism and cognitive impairment mean she doesn't always express herself well

PolterGoose Mon 07-Apr-14 21:30:33

Well said Swans smile it does get better, it's not quick though, that combination of anxiety, sensory and inability to express need is a tough one, and my feeling is I want ds to express his feelings, we just need to find ways to express them with words, even a child as verbally adept as my ds cannot use words to express his needs. Ross Greene is the best.

Kleinzeit Mon 07-Apr-14 21:32:17

Years ago when I went to Early Bird training from the National Autistic Society, the trainer asked how many parents (of preschool and young primary age kids) were getting hit by our kids. About one third of the hands went up sad So no need to feel embarrassed.

I didn’t get hit by DS very often but I used to keep well out of range when he was starting to get agitated. He hasn’t hit me in very many years which is just as well because he’s a hulking great teenager now!

MariaNearlyEaster Tue 08-Apr-14 00:55:57

On a lighter note, rather belatedly found there was a RL goose and carrot pub some years back, and couldn't keep it to myself

I'm sure you all know already, but I think there's a certain beauty in finding it was a seedy south london boozer which used to alternate activities. Heterosexual s&m nights in the cellar one day, the next, a saloon bar full of gay men sat quietly nursing a drink all evening. Presumably served in a poorly-washed pint glass grin

MariaNearlyEaster Tue 08-Apr-14 00:58:55

And here if you want to see the coat of arms grin

youarewinning Tue 08-Apr-14 08:00:06

Hi all. Sounds like you all had interesting days one way or the other.

I had dentist yesterday to have more impressions for new plate. So full of cold and then major jaw ache! Very tired and not myself so sorry I'm just reading and running ATM. Thinking if you all though.

Swansinflight Tue 08-Apr-14 09:07:36

Morning all.

I don't know how to make a thread link but there is one on AIBU called DD and her care which is a mum trying to sort care for her 22 year old with severe LD. Sounds like the supported unit she is currently in is not good news.
Anyone with older teens and adult children who might be able to help? I've suggested she posts on this board, wondered if posters like jimjams would be able to advise.

ouryve Tue 08-Apr-14 10:40:43

That's ace, Maria grin

It's DS2 who is first to go off on one, this holiday. He appears to have lost a letter. Cue pulling the sofa apart, general raking and destruction and some pretty blood curdling screams. Though he must have found something interesting when I suggested he looked upstairs, because after a few more screams he's now bouncing and happy stimming. I should really try and straighten this room out, while he's out of the way.

DS1's happy with his ELC checkout, at least. He's put real money in it, so I hope the drawer doesn't jam, again grin

ouryve Tue 08-Apr-14 10:46:11
Perchkin Tue 08-Apr-14 12:56:04

Well we have started the Easter holidays. Hope it's all going well for everyone. I need to catch up on all the posts (clearly I need to spend more time on here smile).

Yesterday I am so ashamed to say that I lost my temper with DS. We had gone shopping to get him some new school shoes and his behaviour in the shop was less than desirable. Messing about, stimming, talking and shouting, and completely ignoring my requests to come and try on shoes/come over here/ etc etc. After we left the shop and got to the car I really laid into him sad. "Why, just why can't you ever do as you are told or even behave well". I made him cry sad. The rest of our 30 minute journey was spent in silence, until a very sad DS said "Mummy, I think maybe you need to buy me one of those weighted vest things". (I had shown him a picture of one in a catalogue some weeks ago and explained that he might like to use it - he said he didn't want one)

The thought of my small, special 6 year old sitting there after my awful outburst at him, trying to work out what he had done wrong and how he could do better, made me utterly ashamed and sad sad.

I think my lack of tolerance is PMT related, because I'm feeling really low today.

I've also just learnt that our childminder is finishing/retiring. I feel very panicked and stressed. She has looked after DS since he was a baby, knows him and his many foibles inside and out, loves him dearly, and makes him very happy. I have no idea where to start to find another childminder who will "get" my very special DS.

autumnsmum Tue 08-Apr-14 12:58:37

Perch kin don't be ashamed you are a fantastic parent and honestly I know I've lost it with my three more times than I care to remember hugs

Perchkin Tue 08-Apr-14 13:04:17

What plans, if any do you all have for the Easter holidays?

DS wants to go to Legoland smile. And I think I will take him to London to the Aquarium and on the London EYE. He will love the former as he is sea creature obsessed. Not 100% sure about the latter. I just hope he doesn't want to get off half way round!

He is also doing 3 days of drama school. He really, really wanted to do this so I contacted the group and tried to explain his potential difficulties. I think they feel he will be a problem, which makes me sad for him. They have agreed to let him go for the first day and "see how he copes", with a view to me collecting him if necessary. I know that given the appropriate understanding and allowances (repeated instructions, care with his sensory difficulties, a quiet space he can escape to if he needs it etc) he should be able to manage just fine. I feel a bit meh about it now though sad

Perchkin Tue 08-Apr-14 13:05:48

Oh Autumn that's kind of you to say so. We are all doing our best and it is so hard sometimes.
I read what the rest of you go through and think you are all bloody marvellous smile

stillstandingatthebusstop Tue 08-Apr-14 13:08:10

Hi there! I am still a rubbish poster but I have been lurking away.
maria grin goose and carrot IRL

autumnsmum ds2 went through a phase of beingextremely verbally aggressive towards me when his blood sugar was low - it was awful.

I posted on the aibu care thread - supportively but not very knowledgeably. someone else has just posted more helpfully about calling a safeguarding meeting.

polter well done for submitting final ma stuff.

Ourvye I love the sound of the home shop. Holidays are great for creative playing, rather than the ritualistic de-stressing play we do here in term time.

I finally feel I've got 5 mins to post. Ds2 is away with school so I spent last week packing for him and making sure he had all his diabetes equipment and insulin and letters for airport security and spare equipment and extra spare equipment incase everything else gets lost or broken. I am getting better at sending less. The first time he went away I think I sent him with an extra suitcase of things. Crazy.

Ds3 has had his cardiac check up at Alder Hey. The Dr was really pleased with him, although he did find a tiny extra hole in his heart that we didn't know about. It's not a problem the Dr was really happy with ds3's progress but I think it has worried me a little and reminded me of how fragile ds3's heart is.

I took ds3 (12 yrs) to the cinema over the weekend for the very first time. An autism friendly screening of Rio 2. He coped with it really well and only cried on the way in. It was a really good atmosphere and it didn't matter that we talked about the film and the animals throughout. I would take him again.
It's partly my own fault that he was stressed because when we used to drop his brothers off, and I was in a rush and didn't want to go in with ds3, I used to tell him it was scary. Another genius parenting strategy from me grin

stillstandingatthebusstop Tue 08-Apr-14 13:14:17

perchkin thanks thanks It's a hard job and we're not perfect.

Like the sound of London aquarium and eye! I'm glad you spoke up for DS about the drama course and I hope it goes well.

Perchkin Tue 08-Apr-14 13:19:23

Great to hear that your DS3 coped with the cinema. I plan to take DS to one of the autism friendly screenings, as soon as something comes on that I think he'll be OK with.

Sending your DS2 away sounds like a mammoth achievement. Where is he off to?

Polter I seem to have missed the bit about an MA. Well done for submitting. I'm impressed smile

ouryve Tue 08-Apr-14 13:19:29

No plans, Perchkin. DH has to work pretty solidly. He was hoping to be able to take a day off, tomorrow, as DS2 has an early appointment, but he has to go in straight after, or else there will be no one else in the office as the only other person in his team has an appointment later in the morning.

He might be able to get a day working from home, at some point, in which case I'll leave DS2 with him and take DS1 out on the bus, somewhere. Probably just Durham!

We normally stay with my parents for a couple of days over the Easter weekend, but that's not going to be possible, this year, as my mum's been not at all well and doesn't need the stress.

As for today, I'm going to be ambitious. I've planned a trip to the supermarket after dinner (wow!) Meantime, I'm about to complete th eultimate challenge of taking the boys for a walk around the block. We need some fresh air and it's too windy for me to be arsed with the buggy. I'm PMSy, too and my joints are particularly loose, today. I need the leg stretch, regardless but there's going to be the multiple challenge of catching DS2, getting a jumper on him (he won't wear a coat, any more), getting something on his feet (it's dry, so I'll have to let him walk a little way on the hard concrete before he'll recognise this as not worth fighting against) and getting him to walk a whole km without plonking himself on the ground. The circuit I do makes sure we're never more than about 250m from the house, at least.

moosemama Tue 08-Apr-14 13:23:59

Perchin, be kind to yourself. We all lose it sometimes. I shouted at ds1 yesterday for going on his laptop, yet again, without permission. I also have pmt and took it personally, when rationally I know nothing about it was personal. Poor ds is poorly too, so I felt doubly bad about it afterwards.

We're only human and none of us can keep our patience 100% of the time, whether we like it or not, it's perfectly normal for both nt and non-nt children to experience their parents shouting at them on occasion.

Ds1 would love your holiday plans. The Sealife Centre and Legoland are his absolute favourite places in the whole world! grin We were also told at his last parent's evening that he's a natural actor. Fingers crossed the drama school goes well for him. According to his teacher he doesn't have any stage nerves, probably because he doesn't think about what the audience might be thinking about him, iyswim. Ds also has sensory issues around too much noise and chaos and needs instructions directly addressed and repeated, but managed to survive his y6 musical production and was fantastic in it.

We aren't going anywhere. Both sets of grandparents are on holiday, dh is at work, I can't drive and the dogs can't be left.

Both boys have their birthdays during the holidays though and have their best friends coming round for an afternoon on different days. We will do some nice long dog-walks, have a few pj days and I may do some baking with them. Ds1 is also spending a day at dh's office with him - he loves doing that. Might see if we can go for a couple of days out over the weekends when dh is home if we can.

Perchkin Tue 08-Apr-14 13:25:48

Hope the expedition round the block goes off without a hitch ouryve. My DH is working right over the holidays too. We rarely take days off together as it would mean we can't cover so much of the holiday childcare. But as we only have the one DS, it does make single parent outings easier.

stillstandingatthebusstop Tue 08-Apr-14 13:26:42

perchkin he has gone to Spain on a "football development tour" grin with the school football team.

autumnsmum Tue 08-Apr-14 13:27:43

Still standing hope your older ds enjoys the trip and glad the dr at alder hey is pleased with ds 3 progress although I completely understand the worry about the extra hole . Dp has taken ds and dd2 to his mums and dd1 has gone out so v peaceful

Perchkin Tue 08-Apr-14 13:28:08

Sounds like a lot of fun still

ouryve Tue 08-Apr-14 14:10:17

All went smoothly, Perch, once I'd persuaded DS1 to turn his tablet off (his allotted time was up, anyhow) and coaxed DS2 out of the bed he'd made up on the bedroom floor. DS2 even put his own socks and boots on, when I asked him to shock

DS2 even patiently waited for a funeral procession plus all the traffic behind it to pass on the main road, though he might have been somewhat entertained by the Last of the Summer Wine type spectacle of a couple of old guys sorting out sacs of building materials between a large wheelbarrow and a trailer on a mobility scooter, just beside us grin

The air wasn't all that fresh, mind. It reeked of newly sprayed pigshit grin

ouryve Tue 08-Apr-14 15:52:59

DS2 has been experimenting further with moving his bed around. Managed to capture this with my phone before DS1 disapprovingly took it all back upstairs. I don't think he wants anyone sleeping on the ground outside his shop grin

And it appears that it's the letter t that's gone missing. No other t will do. It has to be a particular one.

Which reminds me of the busker we passed, when we collected DS1's glasses, on Saturday, belting out that classic, ^Letter B^confused

autumnsmum Tue 08-Apr-14 16:54:20

Ouryve love the busker story ! Have purchased a lovely bunny for dd2 from the woolly hugs auction

stillstandingatthebusstop Tue 08-Apr-14 17:07:06

Speaking words of wisdom letter B. . .

Lol ouryve grin I can't stop singing it now.

PolterGoose Tue 08-Apr-14 20:10:41

Evenin' all smile

Perch none of us is perfect, be kind to yourself flowers

Long day at work, ds had lovely day at zoo with dp, and I've just had the letter to say he's been triaged by integrated therapy and accepted for a SALT assessment, I hadn't realised how worried I was they'd say 'don't be so ridiculous' just like I felt in the early days of assessment.

Swansinflight Tue 08-Apr-14 20:56:58

Ourvye gorgeous picture. My DS would covet the giant angry bird! Glad walk round the block went well.

Polter really glad to hear DS has been accepted for SALt. Hope it goes well and is useful.

Perchkin really don't feel bad, we've all been there. I know I shouldn't but I always tend to react worse when DS has been a pain in public. It's the whole sense of judgypants being hoicked all around you!

Moose I'm fascinated your DS has a gen for acting. DS is surprisingly keen, on his own terms, and has a bit of a flair. Id always thought that was unlikely in an ASD ish child. Live and learn smile

PolterGoose Tue 08-Apr-14 21:02:06

It's things like acting and public speaking, performing to an audience, where echolalic tendencies, monologing ability and lack of usual social inhibition are very useful wink

hazeyjane Tue 08-Apr-14 21:17:35

Have just managed to get ds to bed, after getting stuck at hospital to meet anaesthetist for ds's extractions. Anaesthetist was lovely and quite possibly the most enthusiastic man I have ever met, 'Yo, Mini Hazey, you look like a little lion to look fit and well...I am going to give this a turbo boost...LETS GO!!!!' ( I am not shitting you ) He is going to be first on the list, done in theatre rather than dental suite in case of complications, they have been warned about excessive bleeding and told under no circumstance to bother with the bloody magic cream. Just got to get the date now.....<drums fingers>

PolterGoose Tue 08-Apr-14 21:21:09

How did ds respond to exuberant anaesthetist hazey? It'll be good to get it done so hope you don't have to wait long.

hazeyjane Tue 08-Apr-14 21:28:23

He sat like this>shock mouth hanging open wide until Dr Bounce asked him if he could open his mouth which point ds buried his face into dh and didn't come back out!

PolterGoose Tue 08-Apr-14 21:32:40

Bless smile

ouryve Tue 08-Apr-14 22:29:50

Aww. All good anaesthetists should be knighted, Hazey.

DS2's interest in birds has waned, but he loves pipers (his name for all creepy crawlies, including the beetles on his duvet!) I bought DS1 the horrible histories mag with all the bugs on the cover, the other week, which inspired him to buy a pack of assorted creepy things from Poundland. I've sort of got used to centipedes in the bath and whatnot, now (just so long as they're not real because I hate how they move) but DS2 is finding all of them endlessly amusing, cockroaches included!

hazeyjane Tue 08-Apr-14 22:33:21

Sorry, only just read back through the thread - my dd2 would love that duvet cover, Ouryve. She loves all things animal and insecty, and would have many adopted ladybirds living with us, if she had her way.

Love the name 'pipers'. Dd2 calls wood lice 'binces' and I can't think of them as anything else now.

Swansinflight Tue 08-Apr-14 23:07:31

Hope all goes well and you get a date soon Hazey. I've met a few anaesthetists in my time and they all seem to be extraordinarily good with people considering their patients are unconscious 90% of the time! Maybe it helps smile

PolterGoose Wed 09-Apr-14 07:23:36

Yes, where did you get that bedding set ouryve ds would love it so much

Where I grew up woodlice were 'cheesy bugs' confused ds insists on proper names of course.

hazeyjane Wed 09-Apr-14 08:05:24

I think everywhere must have different names for woodlice, my nan used to call them 'gramfer gravies', dh'd dad calls them 'granny bonnets'.

Back to the hospital again today, this time with dd2, to rule stuff out wrt her 'sparkles'.

PolterGoose Wed 09-Apr-14 08:09:16

Good luck with dd2 hazey ds's lovely friend is still in limbo, he spent a week as an inpatient wired up not long ago, no results yet. Its a worry flowers

ouryve Wed 09-Apr-14 11:12:49

Unfortunately, I bought the bedding in an M&S sale, a couple of years ago, for the hefty price of £9! He can crouch down and watch spiders and ants for ages. I think their movement fascinates him. I should introduce him to the woodlouse colony in the bathroom, sometime grin

Good luck with the appointment, Hazey.

Took DS2 for his annual paed appointment, this morning. Thankfully, she'd held off replying to the request from DWP regarding his carer's renewal until she'd spoken to us. She was concerned about his walking behaviour regression and the obsessive behaviours that go along with it and is going to refer him to LD CAMHS for advice. Hopefully, once DS1's started his new school, I'll be able to concentrate on tackling the behaviours, as it will matter less if it takes us an hour to get home from school and there will be no competing for my attention.

autumnsmum Wed 09-Apr-14 11:19:06

Hazey good luck with appt and ouryve I hope ld cahms are useful

moosemama Wed 09-Apr-14 11:27:40

Swans, according to ds's drama teacher it's not at all unusual for their ASD pupils to do well in drama, for the reasons Polter mentioned.

Hazey, glad the hospital appointment went ok. Good luck for dd2's appointment today.

We've always just called woodlice, woodlice, but earwigs are kerogues in our house, as that's what my Irish grandad used to call them. There were literally hundreds swarming their house when it first went up - even used to find them in our cornflakes. <<shudder>> I started folding my ears in when I slept when we went there for the summer holidays, as I was convinced they'd crawl in and eat my brain. Unfortunately the ear folding thing became a massive habit and I still do it absently minded now sometimes. blush

Ds1 is still a delightful ball of snot. For a child with OCD about health and germs etc, he's a dirty little so and so when it comes to his own cold-related habits. Everyone else has to practically disinfect themselves if they so much as sniff or clear their throat, but not ds - oh no! He can leave disgusting snotty tissues all over the house, including on the sofa cushions, sneeze and cough without catching it and apparently he doesn't need to wash his hands. hmm We all have to be virtually sterilized to make sure he doesn't catch anything, but when he has a bug he's very happy to generously share it with the world. hmm

Have dragged him out for a dog walk in the sunshine this morning - he wasn't impressed. He's so pale though, he never sees the light of day. Gets picked up by the taxi on our drive, dropped 2ft from the school door and then does the same in reverse on the way home. He barely sees the light of day during term time. I've told him that once his bug is better next week we will all be walking the dogs for at least an hour a day throughout the holidays.

After the walk came his shower - almighty tantrum, despite being proper stinky with greasy hair. Of course once he was in the shower - I couldn't get him out. hmm

It's dd's Easter Bonnet Parade this afternoon and he's extremely unimpressed he has to come with him.

Someone tell me I don't have two and a half more weeks of this to get through.

autumnsmum Wed 09-Apr-14 11:42:58

Moose sympathy ! Ds has rediscovered mine craft and is building a world with a friend

ouryve Wed 09-Apr-14 11:44:57

Your DS1 and mine sound like kindred spirits when it comes to snot, moose.

stillstandingatthebusstop Wed 09-Apr-14 13:08:20

moose thanks cake brew

ouryve that paed sounds very sensible hope you do get time in the future to focus on those behaviours.

I have just sat and watched Philomena (not sure I've spelt that right) as all ds's were out or in bed asleep after school trip. It was my Mothering Sunday present - and I can't see me getting any other opportunity this Easter (Can you tell I feel guilty?). What a totally sad, horrible and yet endearing story. I would recommend it.

autumnsmum Wed 09-Apr-14 17:58:20

Just spent afternoon shopping for clothes for ds and dd2 v tricky to find shorts to fit over her nappy bum !

ouryve Wed 09-Apr-14 18:33:53

It's probably easier for boys, autumn, as there's lots of baggy jogger shorts about. So many girl things seem to be quite closely fitted.

I must admit that you're optimistic hoping for shorts weather wink. There's been years I've given away shorts and t-shirts unworn, or only worn once or twice because the weather's been so atrocious (and it's always a few degrees colder here, anyhow)

stillstandingatthebusstop Wed 09-Apr-14 18:37:16

Oh dear - I only have boys so I can't really help. Maybe someone will know a brand that is more generous in the nappy area. Leggings??

ouryve Wed 09-Apr-14 18:39:52

There's nothing here that doesn't work with a nappy bum and most of it's pretty gender neutral.

autumnsmum Wed 09-Apr-14 18:40:35

Thanks all ouryve you know the nappies I'm talking about ! I've probably seriously jinxed the weather it normally happens when I buy the Dcs sandals then it rains for months . Tbh I don't think if put dd in skinny jeans at 4 nappies or not

ouryve Wed 09-Apr-14 18:41:00

They also have some culottes in the girl section - don't know how discreet they would be when it comes to rolling about and not showing a flash of nappy off, though.

autumnsmum Wed 09-Apr-14 18:41:31

Ouryve next are fab I regularly buy bits for the Dcs there

ouryve Wed 09-Apr-14 18:41:50

And yep, they're quite big, aren't they!

ouryve Wed 09-Apr-14 18:45:09

About 75% of what the boys wear is Next. I keep venturing elsewhere but not very far. M&S jammies are nice, but pricier. JL jammies are lovely at first, but don't wash anywhere near as well as I'd expect for the price. They've had some nice Tu tops, but Sainsburys bottoms are a dead loss and the jammies I got DS1 twisted out of shape, so can't be passed down to DS2, so aren't such a bargain as they seemed. Landsend are great, if you shop the sale, but pricey otherwise. Their jammies are crap!

PolterGoose Wed 09-Apr-14 18:59:23

My ds is pretty much outfitted in Next stuff too, apart from his hideously expensive socks and a few Boden tops.

hazeyjane Wed 09-Apr-14 22:05:44

Ds just gone to sleep, after an evening of shenanigans.

Dd2's hospital appointment was fine, he said he didn't think she was suffering from migraines or anything neurological, and has referred us to the opthamology department.

Feel stupidly sad about finding a note under dd2's pillow saying 'dady plees com home, mummy is being a pain in the bottim' - i feel daft for feeling hurt by it, but i am a bit oversensitive and crap at the moment.

We get quite a lot of the dd's clothes from fat face (via ebay), the trousers in particular are quite generous.

ouryve Wed 09-Apr-14 22:24:24

When you posted that video, polter, I had to laugh because DS1 was wearing the same top, the day I watched it!

Hazey, if we weren't being a pain in the bottom, sometimes, we wouldn't be doing our job properly grin

The problem I find with trousers that are generous is that the waists tend to be, too, so they're far too short by the time they stay up! One of the reasons we mostly stick with Next trousers. The School trousers grew a bit in width, a couple of years ago and DS1 ended up walking around with several inches of elastic poking out of either side of the waistband, but I invested in some slim fit, instead.

Actually, I'd been concerned that between his early morning bread binges and lack of walking, DS2 was beginning to get a bit porky. He's absolutely fine, it turns out! I think I'd just got used to him being so skinny looking.

signandsingcarols Thu 10-Apr-14 08:12:48

hope the hols are going well for most, we have been at nannys and ds has been travelling on the trains, to his joy, (not to go any where, just to travel) 11 trains a day, grin and the cable car thingy over the thames, dh is so thrilled to have been able to share it with him, (I think they both enjoyed it as much as each other). grin

(poulter, did my PGCE 2nd yr at masters level, but don't expect that to transfer... although it might be worth asking if there is any 'advance standing' fro previous study... but no Masters, yet... am really tempted.)

PolterGoose Thu 10-Apr-14 08:21:06

The sounds lovely sign smile go for it with the masters, I am so glad mine is over, after 3 years it is a huge relief, but it's been good for me to do it, as I still have school failure hang-ups hmm

Ds is planning to write more of his book today because it means he will 'have something good to read at bedtime' grin we are having big problems finding stuff he will read, he's read his favourite books many times but is resistant to new or 'hard' books even though he's a very good reader, he is very lazy.

bochead Thu 10-Apr-14 13:32:07

LA have finally agreed to amend part 4 of DS's statement to say that hes home edded. They've said that the ED psych will monitor progress on a termly basis. I have asked why they want to check with me about his progress rather than his online school, as they would with the teachers in a brick built school, and now await their answer with baited breath.

I'm fine with that, and am now waiting for the final document to be issued. Hopefully that's an official end to years of carrot meetings, as DS is MORE than capable of boring the pants off the EP about his latest science exploits without my help. If she's any sense she'll accept a written report once a term from the online school after the first visit lol!

(DS is going thru a particularly boring monologue phase right now).

moosemama Thu 10-Apr-14 13:44:32

Polter, we are having the same problem with ds1. He used to be a prolific reader, to the extent we couldn't keep up. He'd read all 8 library books in less than a week and then borrow more from school and get through those too. He finished the library's summer reading scheme in less than a week and they were gobsmacked, but now he is really resistant to reading. He's read all his favourite stuff so many time and declares any new books boring, despite previously loving to absorb fact books on just about anything, but especially science and nature.

I recently discovered the Wow range of visual encyclopaedias. Showed them to him on Amazon on the look-inside facility and he said they looked good, so have bought the science one for his birthday and if it holds his attention will buy some of the others. Wow Encyclopedia of Everything.

His history and science teachers at school said he needs to start reading around the topics a bit, as he has a really good knowledge base, but needs to keep it updated and also develop a keener interest. Unfortunately, the dry way they've been teaching the topics has completely turned him off both subjects, when they would previously have been his favourites. hmm I'm hoping getting him some easy to read fact/information books that he's willing to at least try reading might help.

bochead that's fantastic news. I am so pleased for you and your ds that you are finally going to be left in peace for him to enjoy his learning experiences. Brilliant!

Well, my baby boy is 12 years old today! 12 YEARS! shock how did that happen? He has had a Minecraft server as his main present, so guess what he's been doing all day. grin Well, to be fair we took him to a cafe for milkshake and gf cake first thing, but their gf cakes hadn't been delivered so we took him to his favourite ice-cream shop on the way home instead. Then dh and him set up the server, while I walked the dogs and now peace is reigning, as dh has gone back to work, the dogs are knackered and ds is glued to his laptop. grin

I have to shift my backside to make him a lemon drizzle cake, then, gf macaroni cheese followed by home made apple crumble and custard. Think he may well have had dairy overload by the end of the day. hmm

PolterGoose Thu 10-Apr-14 14:08:32

boc that sounds like a great result, I am sure the EP will either get bored of the visits or find more pressing work to do (you would hope). Though she might be useful for impromptu assessments if you want to check anything out.

Happy birthday not-so-mini-moose cake (GF of course)

moose glad it's not just my ds, I'm going to have a peruse of the Book People in a moment to see what they've got, he does like series of books (same as me) and does like fiction at bedtime.

PolterGoose Thu 10-Apr-14 14:12:59

moose that book looks ideal, so I've ordered it for ds's birthday, and the animal one too smile

autumnsmum Thu 10-Apr-14 14:23:53

Happy birthday mini moose

ouryve Thu 10-Apr-14 15:34:12

Happy birthday, mooseling

boc that sounds fairly positive. I'm sure the EP, in true LA EP style, won't have all that much time on their hands!

Well, I didn't get DS2 out for a walk, today. He put his ordinary crocs on and made for the garage - so I took DS1 for a long walk and got plenty of exercise of my own. Funny how uphill with that buggy is always slower than down.

DH is having his tooth out, at the moment. Is it bad that the first thing I'm going to do when he gets in is run myself an actual bath? I haven't had one since Sunday and I never feel properly clean after showers.

moosemama Thu 10-Apr-14 16:46:11

Thanks all.

ouryve, he loved that cake - thank you. smile

Happy Birthday Moosey

Ouryve, what is that fab train place near you called again?

Spent the day at the Tate Modern and National Gallery coz though busy there were no noisy kids. Myself - I hate Art (yes really, and books btw so now you prolly hate me now) but I was overwhelmed at being able to get so close to the work of Artists even I have heard of.

hazeyjane Thu 10-Apr-14 21:45:09

Happy Birthday Mooseboy!

ouryve Thu 10-Apr-14 22:29:51

It's the National Railway Museum, Starlight. The main one's in York, but there's branches in Darlo (of course) and Shildon.

Unless you're thinking of Beamish, with the Trams grin

Ooh, it might have been Beamish. Heading that way next week and hoping to check out some tracks....

MariaNearlyEaster Thu 10-Apr-14 23:30:40

Boch flowers that's fantastic! Finally! Now you can 'just' get on with things in a straightforward, unhindered manner grin

For anyone interested going to railway museums, here's one way to avoid the crowds

MariaNearlyEaster Thu 10-Apr-14 23:32:25

Moose, he has his own server shock. Is it as cool as it sounds?
Can't tell ds, he'll be [green] forever

bochead Fri 11-Apr-14 00:14:03

Noone tell DS that another child has his own server please!

His minecraft use is currently being rationed wink as the sun has been known to make an appearance in recent days, and unreasonable being that I am; I've been insisting he loses that whole plumpy well fed vampire look he's got going on, by getting out in the fresh air.

To be fair it makes sense to stay in nodding contact with the EP as DS will need some sort of adjustment for exams in the very distant future (like being allowed to use a laptop/alphasmart???) & it's the EP who does the official report for the exams boards. So I think it makes sense to keep her name on the statement iyswim.

autumnsmum Fri 11-Apr-14 08:31:23

Morning all quick question what is your own server?

hazeyjane Fri 11-Apr-14 08:38:17

and does it serve brew/cake/wine. Otherwise i'm not interested.

ouryve Fri 11-Apr-14 09:06:17

I'll be sure to wave, Starlight wink

Beamish is set out with several sites (village, school, farm etc) on a circular road. You can either walk between them or hop onto the tram.

DS1 has been doing well with his new screen time regime. He's allowed an hour between 8am and noon and another hour between lunch and dinner. There's been no TV on all day "for DS2" who doesn't care about it all that much. There's been no mooching around, though the checkout got put away, last night after he bit a piece off a plastic 20p and showed it to me insisting it was a manufacturing flaw with a technical name that I can't remember. When he's not been playing with his shop, he's been playing with lego, up in his room. We've had a few "moments", but the only meltdown we've had was DS2's the other day and DS1 didn't even get rattled by that.

DH is working from home today, so I'm going to leave DS2 to entertain him and take DS1 into Durham.

hazeyjane Fri 11-Apr-14 10:29:55

Good Lord - I've just seen a Hazeybabe on a thread!! Can I just reassure everyone that this isn't me in another guise (I would be more of a Hazeyhag)

moosemama Fri 11-Apr-14 10:33:32

Maria, yes, in his opinion it is super cool.

We did have to talk him down from a 40 user server at £120 a year and in the end got it down to a £27.00 pa deal plus about £8.00 a month for add-ons, which he was able to cover using his birthday money. Dh is the administrator for it though, so it's being tightly controlled.

He was allowed free access yesterday, but is back to an hour and a half computer time a day from today and I am force-marching him on daily dog walks with me while he's on holiday, so he's actually starting to look slightly less like a ghostly apparition than he did on his last day of term.

He also had a second Lego Minecraft set (The Nether) and a Lego Star Wars set, as well as the Wow science book I mentioned upthread and Horrible Science Chemical Chaos, so he has non-screen stuff to do as well. Oh - and of course he had his beloved Yogscast 'Diggy Diggy Hole' hoodie. (Yogscast being a bunch of people (superheroes in ds's eyes) who make vast amounts of money playing games like Minecraft and uploading them to YouTube.)

autumn it's when you host your own Minecraft world and control who comes to play on it. Apparently very cool to teenage boys - and girls in some cases, but as you say, it doesn't actually serve wine [coffee] or cake so not of much use or interest to me. grin

autumnsmum Fri 11-Apr-14 10:34:52

Hazey as polter pointed out up thread there is an autumnmum we are being cloned

PolterGoose Fri 11-Apr-14 10:48:24

Hazeybabe shock

I've yet to see another Polter, lots of Goose names about though.

After a bloody awful day yesterday (3 wobbly teeth and first day of hayfever didn't help) ds is so far much calmer today. He is having some 'issues' with concentration, and was ticcy yesterday too (a mouth tic) which is new for us, hoping it's just a passing thing. Limited interests plus poor concentration is a tad hard going.

SummerRain Fri 11-Apr-14 11:15:23

Anyone ever been to the town of Settle in Yorkshire? I'm stuck here for the next four and a half hours and need to find something interesting to look at quickly or I'm going to fall asleep. I got up at 2pm yesterday and haven't slept yet. Left home at 9.30 last night; one bus, one flight and two trains later and I'm hanging.

SummerRain Fri 11-Apr-14 11:17:13

Moose, belated happy birthday to your lad. Sounds like he's happy with his haul anyway grin

moosemama Fri 11-Apr-14 11:54:33

I love Settle, used to go there with dh and the dogs before we had ds, but mainly for dog walks and food. blush

There used to be lots of interesting independent shops and some really nice cafe's that did tasty veggie/vegan options.

Can you find a bookshop, buy something nice to read, then ensconce yourself in the corner of a lovely tea rooms with a pot of tea and some scones? That would see off at least an hour, more if you have a couple of refills.

Tourist Info is based in the Market Square. They might be able to give you some ideas.

Thanks Ouryve. No idea what day we'll be there or indeed even how. DH is due in Edinburgh next Wednesday for work and has decided we'd all love an 8 hour journey to accompany. I'm trying to find bargain chips. One is the A1 coast road as I have been on it once and would love to do it again.

I want to steer clear of the Lakes as I'm a miserable sod who only recollects boredom and rain when I lived there and if the weather ever brightened slightly, tourists in crocs and expensive waterproofs clogging up all the cafes and pretending the weather is anything other than slightly better than drizzle.

hazeyjane Fri 11-Apr-14 12:57:30

Excuse me whilst I swear.

Fucking bollocks.

We have been packing to go to London for the weekend to stay with our closest friends, girls have their rucksacks packed and ds packed his Mr Tumble bag. We were supposed to be leaving as soon as dh finishes work.

Ds has spent the last hour vomiting, 4 times so far. He is pale and floppy and everything smells of puke. Dd1 is in tears in bed because she is so gutted that we have had to cancel and dd2 is hiding in my room because she is scared of sick.

Selfishly, I am close to tears myself, dh has been very down lately and I was looking forward to an evening, sat with friends laughing and drinking wine, and him having a chance to chat with his best friend.


PolterGoose Fri 11-Apr-14 13:17:34

Oh hazey (((hugs)))

Hazey Can at least one of you go? Or would that put too much of a burden on the other?

What is causing the vomiting? Is it something you can treat?

(When DS vomits it is always because he has an ear infection he can't feel hmm and he requires antibiotics which immediately stop the vomiting)

hazeyjane Fri 11-Apr-14 13:42:20

Urgh, another 2 voms. It is probably a build up of fluid in his upper respiratory tract, exacerbated by reflux. It has happened before. There is no temperature, and it is unlike to be something he ate.

This evening and tonight is probably going to be a bit grim, but dh is going to see whether he can take the girls to meet up with them for the day tomorrow, and ds and I stay here.

Dd1 has just said, we are always having to cancel stuff because ds is ill, and I feel sad for her and dd2 because it is true.

autumnsmum Fri 11-Apr-14 13:52:20

Oh hazey hugs

ouryve Fri 11-Apr-14 14:28:50

Starlight - if you veer off the A1 and go up the Northumberland coast, the best chips to be had are from Neptune in Seahouses - complete with dribbly stainless steel pot of tea and white sliced bread and butter!

Hazey sad

I'm knackered, anyhow. Making sure that DS1 walked up and down a few hills in Durham as worn me out before him! He was pleased to find a load of horrible histories/science/geography books in the sniny new poundland, where HMV used to be and bought himself a book about Stormy Weather.

I still need to pop down to the GP surgery to get DS1's prescription sorted out. I need to be able to pick it up next Tuesday, or else we'll not manage to get hold of it before his current lot runs out, thanks to the bank holidays and the difficulty in getting the tablets dispensed, locally. The sodding letter from CAMHS only just arrived, this morning, though, just as i was about to make a disgruntled phone call, so it's not in the system, yet and I can't renew online and I need to make sure they've seen it, or I'll turn up on Tuesday and the prescription won't be ready, either.

moosemama Fri 11-Apr-14 16:34:33

Oh hazey - more hugs. sad Hope you can salvage some of the weekend.

Feeling a bit ... can't even think of an appropriate word.

Ds1 and I just walked up to pick up ds2 and dd. Dd and I were standing together talking about her day and ds1 squatted down a couple of feet away in the corner near the equipment shed to play a game on his phone.

Current y6 came out of the door, several of them formed a huddle and it wasn't long before they started pointing and giggling at ds1. He wasn't even doing anything odd, all kids his age spend every waking minute glued to their phones - I think it was just the way he was squatting on his ankles.

I fixed couldn't actually hear exactly what they were saying, so fixed them with a sharp stare and their little group started to break up. Then three of them started to walk home together and as they went stopped a couple of feet in front, pointed at ds and started muttering and whispering 'that's ds1, he used to come here - he's weird'. Then they looked up, realised I'd heard and scuttled off before I could catch and confront them.

Thought that was an end to it, but when ds2 came out and we started to walk home, I realised that another two of the same y6's were waiting for ds1 around the other side of the shed. They hadn't realised he was with me, thought he was on his own and were clearly waiting to have a go at him in some way. One of them was a lad that used to torment him when he was at the school and frustratingly is favoured by the teachers, so no-one would believe ds1, even though there were other pupils who witnessed him picking on ds and told the teachers. We were told "Oh no, it couldn't have been X, he's such a good boy - your ds must have misread his intention." when he did things like nicked ds's lunch bag, stamped on it and was throwing it around the changing rooms to all his mates with ds (who is smaller than all of them) desperately running around trying to get it back, frequently called ds a freak and got his friends to chant it at him and other equally delightful things. angry

I stopped and looked them straight in the eye and they suddenly realised they'd been copped and shuffled off. I couldn't say anything to them, as they hadn't done anything - yet, but it was clear as day that they were about to and would have done had I not been there.

Ds1 was oblivous to the whole thing and still is, but it's really rattled me. It makes me realise that I'm right to still not allow ds up to the park. This is supposed to be a nice, safe area with very low crime rates etc, but ds is just too much of a target even to younger children. I am under no illusion that if they'd got ds on his own and had the opportunity these kids would have done something to upset and humiliate him. There was a bin near where they were standing that had the remnants of ds2's science class's experiment in (bicarb and vinegar) and stank to high heaven. The boys were pointing at the bin then gesturing towards ds with their heads, iyswim. I'm fairly sure they meant to tip it on him. sad

Why do kids have to be so bloody cruel. sad

PolterGoose Fri 11-Apr-14 16:45:50

moose angry and sad and not just at the Y6ers themselves, but that they haven't learned either from their parents or in school about being nice, not bullying, etc etc.

moosemama Fri 11-Apr-14 17:33:47

Thanks Polter. I don't think any of the kids at that school are learning about tolerance, respect and not bullying. The school just does nothing to deal with bullying until you reach the point of threatening the with the LEA. angry

Dd told me today that she was pushed off the play equipment by a little girl who has Downs Syndrome. She's the only child in the school who has anything other than a hidden disability - which gives you some idea of how un inclusive they are, despite what their prospectus claims. hmm

The little girl in question is a sweetheart, but couldn't understand that it wasn't her class' turn on the equipment today. She normally has a 1:1 with her in the playground, but apparently she was elsewhere dealing with an incident on the field - I think another child had been injured and she'd run to help.

Dd said that when the TA came back she told dd to forget about it, because it had happened a long time ago, but that she didn't understand why she said that because it had literally only just happened. So I explained that what she meant was that for that little girl, by the time the TA came back and was told, it would probably have seemed like pushing dd off had happened a long time ago and she may not have understood what she was being told off for if they had reprimanded her. I agreed that it's not nice to push people off equipment, but explained that the little girl in question might find it a little harder to understand the rules and like ds1, might also find it hard to cope with frustration. If her TA had been there she would have dealt with it immediately, but by the time she came back it was too late. Dd is only 5, but understood that some children just need to have a bit more consideration than others and that doesn't mean we shouldn't like them. (Dd was very keen to tell me that she still really likes her. smile)

Bit of a ramble, but I'm getting there ... the other girls in dd's class don't like this little girl and say things like she talks like a baby etc. These are 4/5 year olds and they are already noticing and discriminating against pupils who have disabilities. There is a little lad in dd's class who has developmental delay. Obviously he isn't as mature as his peers and is struggling to cope with the educational aspect, as well as still being in nappies. Dd and I have had lots of chats about him and she feels a little about him as she does about her big brother. He gets on her nerves quite a lot with some of his antics, but she appreciates that it's not his fault and she shouldn't judge. The other kids all call him naughty and say they don't like him. sad

It saddens me that nothing is being done to challenge their attitudes towards disability at such a young age. I'd like to think if they did some PHSE work around differences and acceptance etc at this age it would help to lay the foundations of them growing up to be far more tolerant and understanding - but then again, knowing many of the parents (and teachers) and their, often vociferous attitudes to SNs I am sad to say I think it would be an uphill struggle. sad

SummerRain Fri 11-Apr-14 17:53:18

Moose, I got rescued by the mayor of the town who drove me up to Malham tarn. Just as well, I was dozing off! Fell asleep on a couch in the common room when I got here blush

It's so sad hearing you talk about the kids at the school. They're so young and could easily be taught tolerance. Ds2 is weird as hell yet his classmates just accept him and the school work really hard to foster that inclusiveness, without highlighting his differences. It's a tricky balance but it is manageable. If our school can do it with mixed classes, no 1-1s and hardly any resources there's no excuse for any school sad

PolterGoose Fri 11-Apr-14 17:54:12

It's awful moose and worrying for the future. To be fair to ds's school, they've been pretty good on the broader inclusion stuff (not the specifics of meeting ds's needs fully though!). From what I've read on here other schools would have excluded him many times over for some of his worst behaviours and they haven't.

hazey how are you doing? and ds?

PolterGoose Fri 11-Apr-14 17:55:41

Summer sounds like you've had an interesting day smile

SummerRain Fri 11-Apr-14 18:00:12

Long, I've been up since 2pm yesterday apart from my couch cat nap. I'm proud of myself though, I've never attempted a trip this complicated and I didn't Feck up or get lost grin

PolterGoose Fri 11-Apr-14 18:05:27

Well done grin

hazeyjane Fri 11-Apr-14 18:15:24

Still puking, he had a few sips of water, and it came back up, so now I'm thinking bug. He perked up when dh came home, but has gone back to floppily snuggling in next to me wrapped up in a towel.

Hospital booking officer rang to say they can do ds's tooth extraction next Weds if there is a senior anaesthetist free, but it would be in the afternoon - which would probably mean an overnight stay. Hopefully whatever is causing the vomiting will be out of the way by then, if not we'll cancel.

SummerRain Fri 11-Apr-14 18:27:35

Hazey flowers and buckets of brew to keep you going. Hope minihazey is feeling better tomorrow.

PolterGoose Fri 11-Apr-14 18:34:23

Hope he gets well soon hazey

Anyone opening up?

hazeyjane Fri 11-Apr-14 18:37:04

I would, but I'm all rubber gloves and Dettol. Not very welcoming.

Aren't we going to move along to a clean table tonight? My arms just stuck to the table when I leaned forward for the gossip.

PolterGoose Fri 11-Apr-14 20:06:39

Oh, go on then Star (nice to see you back as 'you') open up wine < bribe- motivator?

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