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question for wise mners, how to get ds1 some respite care and other musings

(13 Posts)
MrsShrek3 Sun 02-Mar-14 11:58:44

ds1 is 13. has asd, and just to establish the level of need he gets DLA hrc and lrm. 1:1 support in school for a lot of the time but he's in second ability set of 5 in mainstream, so clearly doing ok academically.
he spends all his time with family apart frim one sports group he attends each week. Just wondering whether we could get him some support to do stuff a teen "should" be doing - going to the cinema/town/park/whatever. it's not the thing to do going with your mum and dad, is it.... has anyone done this?

MrsShrek3 Mon 03-Mar-14 07:28:05

bump smile

Here you would be looking at direct payments for that sort of support - or a specialist inclusion scheme that provides 1:1 workers to enable access to mainstream activities.

Ring SS & ask for an assessment. Be clear about whether you're looking for respite (for you) or help accessing activities (for your son). The other keyword is 'short breaks'

But yes there should be something - give SS a call (& don't be put off if the duty SW is unhelpful - ime they often are).

ohtowinthelottery Mon 03-Mar-14 19:51:04

Does he have a Statement? If so then you will be starting to look at Transition planning soon, so make sure that the requirement for this sort of thing is included in the planning as a step towards adulthood/independence.

Unfortunately, the Disabled Children's part of Social Care often only deal with young people with a low IQ (ie learning disability), so you may not get any help through them.

Our LA do, however, run various activities for young people who would not qualify for specific 'assessed' services under the Short Breaks scheme. Some of them are ASD specific whilst others are mixed. I would be surprised if you got direct payments, but no harm in asking for an assessment. It is more likely these days that they will suggest that you use his DLA to fund a 'buddy'/carer to take him out. Your LA website should list what is on offer by way of activities which might be suitable for your DS to access without you - but probably won't include trips to cinema/park unless there is a Youth Club type activity.

bruffin Mon 03-Mar-14 20:01:53

Coming fron the opposite side.
My dd's friend had a job taking a teenage girl with Downes shopping and hanging out with her at the weekend. My dd and her both volunteered at a SEN scheme and i think the parents contacted the scheme. My dd 16 has been offered 4 hours a week doing respite for a little boy. It involves SS who will come and talk to dd so all appears to be above board

Actually that's a point. You could try the NAS befriender scheme if they run one on your area.

MrsShrek3 Tue 04-Mar-14 07:31:52

oooh you lot are amazing. loads of ideas there, thank you for all of them - will have a look around locally. There is a youth group but he won't go - we made it as far as the car park once hmm grin

MrsShrek3 Tue 04-Mar-14 07:35:22

fwiw quite decent Children withDisabilities services here, hadn't even realised that this stuff might be under theor umbrella blush

Or if you live near a university with a psychology department try putting an ad up. Lots of people want to go into clinical psychology but they need experience coming out of their ears to have a hope of getting on a course - they may be willing to volunteer.

MrsShrek3 Wed 05-Mar-14 22:25:50

thank you for pointing out differences re respite and activity support. hadn't considered it like that.

basildonbond Thu 06-Mar-14 21:50:02

Sorry to butt in as I do t normally post on here but ... Ds2 is 14 and has ASD and dyspraxia - he also only goes to one sports activity once a week (and that's cricket so lots of stats to keep him happy - plus he's been going for years and never speaks but seems to enjoy it)

However I don't think he 'needs' to be doing stuff 'normal' teens do - there are after all many ways to be a teen - as going to the park/cinema with friends etc would push him way out of his comfort zone to a point where any possibly pleasure would be sucked out of the situation only to be replaced with anxiety

nennypops Thu 06-Mar-14 22:05:04

Don's just phone them to ask for an assessment, put it in writing - that way the clock starts ticking. If or when they put you off by saying that ds doesn't fit their criteria, point out that isn't a justifiable reason for refusing under section 17 of the Children Act 1989.

MrsShrek3 Thu 06-Mar-14 23:26:54

basildon, I agree it may not suit everyone and is perhaps a personality thing. however, my ds1 wants to be doing social stuff but doesn't know "how" and his default position is go with family. he wants to have more freedom though but lacks suitable friends (all aspies!) and / or confidence.

thank you nenny for the advice.

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