Having a bad time again.
I am convinced DS has asd, it took me a while to understand it and realising it since
Paed said DS ,4, is on the 'mild' end of spectrum.

DS has a speech delay (of around 15 months or so) both in expressive and receptive language, and can be very repetitive with questions and some echolalia.
He also has a very muffled, unclear speech, doesn't sound many consonants and mix them up.

DS has a few rituals (he has to open/close doors, turn lights on, press tv/dvd buttons, stacking up cushions, putting 2 spoons of choco powder in his bottle,...all of which MUST be done by him in a certain way or we have tears and tantrums), some stimming (mainly vocal), and a bit of hand /finger twirling when he is upset or too excited, and some sensory issues (noises, bright lights, tactile, food)

His play skills are not age appropiate (EP said they are imature), he has little imagination when playing, he doesn't do symbolic pretend play and is also repetitive in how he plays. He doesn't like to join in group table activities at nursery, and frequently 'stares off' into space.

His social skills are fairly limited with other children, he can do the chasing bit and laughting and running with them , but doesn't know how to approach them appropriately, or join in the play unless someone helps him to do it. DS cannot do sharing, is obsessive with toy cars and trains,... and simply scream to show distress when unhappy at nursery about something. DS is a fairly anxious child on the whole.

DS has quite limited empathy, he will not come and cuddle when someone cries , he will look , sometimes ignore or simply say" what's matter!". DS has never ever expressed emotions verbally, never said 'i love you or even i like you mummy' (he can say i like motorbike though!) or even 'i'm happy or sad'.

DS will observe the other kids, imitates them down to the last detail and do parralel play.
Ds does give good level of interaction with professionals on a 1:1, allow them into his play, and will show some flexibility (although that can be on his own terms)
So mainly because he imitates so perfectly (too well! in my books, because that's his own way of socialing) and because he allow adults into his space and gives joint attention and some eye contact, i'm told by salt and EP...."asd kids just simply don't do that!", they both say DS 's issues are down to his speech delay and he may just have a few asd traits but not enough for asd.

I totally disagree. Am i right?
EP only spent 30 mins with DS on one occasion, and salt sees him one in a blue moon in a structured setting during salt therapy.

I know EP and salt are not qualified to make asd dx, and therefore shouldn't be saying he hasn't got asd. But they are saying it!
I am convinced their opinions will have a big impact on consultant's paed decision concerning referal to CAMHS.
There is nothing i can do about it.

I feel like telling the paed quite bluntly that i (and DH) believe DS has some form of autism and that EP and salt have not spent enough time with DS to warrant their assumptions.
Would that be a foolish thing to do.....???

I want these people to listen and take us seriously.

Sorry , rant over.