ok at least I had the clarity of mind to ask you lot first thank you. I am shelving it.

agree with the Tony Atwood book being very very helpful.

agree - don't send it

I think that you're being a bit unreasonable to make this bit a complaint - it's only been a couple of days since you sent the first email, and he may need to speak to others before replying who may be on days off (no consultant here works a full week!)

But I can totally see why you're frustrated. FWIW, I rarely communicate with J's psych by letter - I usually phone and she calls back the same day - why don't you try phoning? You might get a quicker response that way than sitting in an in-box or becoming a 'come-back-to-that-later' case.

thanks for the feedback I will do all those things Monday then.

take out the stuff about making the complaint. as apart from anything else, I presume you aren't 100% sure at this stage whose fault the botched referral is - whether it was GP/HV or at the paed's office, so no point going in heavy right now against the paed. Also - I would not rely on the e-mail - in that I would also 1)call up CAMHS to try and find out what the heck is going on and 2)try and get through to paed's secretary, and explain you need an urgent appointment given the sleep and other issues as mentioned in your e-mail. paed sec may be able to help - or may tell you to get your GP to contact them for an urgent referral.

I would wait a little longer for a reply. My paed's response time is precisely 23 days!

Meanwhile take "little here" out in the pushchair for a walk-or to the park, perhaps?

I don't know if it would be worth ringing the disabled children section of the social services and explaining the situation on the off chance that they may be supportive and able to help?

i still havent had a reply to the email DS is just so manic he is talking so fast and then licking and running into everything and screaming and throwing. We have agreed (the 3 of us) to do the restraining method for a while wrt the violence issues. He is just so loud. I feel like crying. I wish he would just be quiet for a little bit. DH and I cant have even a 5 min conversation, literally, not even that. I am so tired! I mean I am so so tired I just feel like not doing anything but its DH's bday and I am trying to make it nice for him. But I have a migraine and DS is just so manic. I know he is manic because in the brief second he stopped talking because he was tripping over his words he just started licking himself loads.

I have drafted a follow on email but not sent it. We are going out for a while. What should I do? DH says I may offend the doctors and burn bridges but I just dont know waht to do. I still dont know ANYTHING. I dont know what the schedule of events is going to be. It could be a year or a month I have no idea. I dont want to go in guns blazing because I haev a very healthy fear of the power of the nhs but I just feel like an idiot sitting here not knowing anything or being answered.

What should I change about this please help

---

Dear ---,

I have not received a reply to this email sent 30 June. I am sorry if contacting Dr. --- over email is somewhat of a nuisance to her or yourself but as I have not been given any alternative means of communicating or receiving help for us there is not much more I can do.

Can I please have an answer to the questions asked previously:

When are we seeing CAHMS again?

When are we seeing Dr. --- again?

Is Dr. --- willing to give us a prescription for melatonin for --- to help him calm down enough to fall asleep?

While this may be one of many cases for Dr. --- may I remind you that we were referred nearly a year ago and our referral was misplaced by Colchester hospital on more than one occasion. It has been suggested that we "jumped the gun" somewhat in the past with assuming --- had some form of autism, but considering the lack of constructive support, communication, and interest we have had it is not surprising we are resorting to trying to solve this on our own. I am not asking for an instant diagnosis but some level of consideration as to informing me how the professionals are planning on going forwards. At the moment I have no information whatsoever and am just waiting for a letter that may or may not come. It seems that at the moment this is very much a one way street. I am afraid I have decided to make a complaint to PALS about how the referral was mishandled, how poor the communication has been, and how little support we have had as I feel the whole thing has been somewhat of a shambles and certainly not compassionate to a family with a lovely child in distress. I will copy you in to the complaint that I make.

I am sorry I have had to send you an email of a complaining nature, I have genuinely tried to keep a positive working relationship with all the experts involved and would like to continue doing so in future, but I am afraid my priority is my family and the best interests of my son, which are currently not being listened to.

Kind Regards,

WetAugust I wanted to say I just ordered that book off amazon should be here within a week. Thank you.

lingle I havent decided what to do about the email. I am so exhausted and sleepy and tearful I dont want to do anything right now.

with lawyer hat on I'd call his secretary with bubbla's post in front of me, asking her to check the email arrived and mentioning a couple of points that bubbla made.

But givemesleep and others would have better advice as they know this system - it's not like the patent courts I suspect!!!!!!!