Feeling very tearful about dd,s dx

[jenk1]

i spent most of yesterday in bed, i couldnt stop crying, im still crying today, i dont know why im like this i KNEW she was ASD. its not a shock.

yesterday the HV phoned me, she sounded not convinced when i told her that dd had been dx,d and said ah but did they do the ADOS?

when i said no she said hmm, well she is being transferred to dr xxx now and she is a specialist so they will probably want to do more tests.

but i dont want her to do any more tests on dd, she,s been through enough, i want them to leave her for a while, she wont sit through an ados anyway, the paed told us it will be when she,s older that they can say whereabouts she is on the spectrum.

im gutted that we have to change hospitals as well cos she,s been there since newborn and we,ve built up a really good rapport with the staff and now she will have to get used to a whole new set.
but thats politics for you.

mike made me smile, when i told him she was ASD he said YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY another one im not the only one thats great that mum

[deepbreath]

Sorry to hear your news.

I haven't got any experience of ASD, but I was sure that my dd had a genetic condition from the day she was born. We had to wait a while to get the genetic test result back, and I was still in shock when the specialist told us.

Until they say "yes" for definate, there's always a slight hope that we might be wrong.

I hope that you and your dd will get the support that you need now that you have a diagnosis.

[Flamesparrow]

Oh Jenk

[mccreadymum]

I think however much you have expected the diagnosis it still hurts. You go through so many feelings (or I did) - why us, it's so unfair, how is life going to be in the future etc etc. They say there are 5 stages of grief, but I think I also went through them after the dx - denial, anger, sorrow, something I can't remember and then acceptance. Good luck to you Jenk - a fag and a glass of champagne this evening might help a little? big hug to you

[tobysmumkent]

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[magso]

Oh Jenk I'm sorry you feel so sad. Give yourself time to accept the implications of the diagnosis, and be gentle with yourself for a while. Sounds like you have a lot to cope with. Take care. Magso

[twocutedarlings]

Hi Jenk,

Im sorry your going through all this.

When we were going through DDs assessments i always knew that she would get a Dx of ASD, but i dont think i really dared to totally admit it to myself IYKWIM, and then when the Dx came it was awful because it ment that i would finally have to admit it to myself.

My DD got her Dx in september this year, and its just starting to get a little better im still tearfull from time to time, but there are now more good days than bad ones.

Take care xx

[2mum]

Hi jenk Im sorry to hear you are feeling this way. I felt the same as you after my ds2`s diagnosis even though i knew he has asd. i took it really bad and it took me monthe to get used to it. Time really does heal a bit. It may not seem like that now. Hoping you feel better soon.
Take care {{hugs}}
2mum

[staryeyed]

Jenk you got a lot going on right now. Give yourself time to deal with it. Its natural to feel how you are feeling.

[dustystar]

So sorry you feel like this jenk. It makes my post on your other thread completely inappropriate It is hard when your worst fears are confirmed even if you expect them to be.

[Dinosaur]

jenk1

you know my DS3 was dx'd with ASD in May this year? Even though I knew it was coming, it was still very very hard, and it hit me very hard, as any of the mumsnetters who know me in RL and who saw me in the aftermath of it all will testify. And even now I will be fine and then all of a sudden - wham! feel like I have been felled by a truckload of sorrow. It is very hard.

Be gentle on yourself. Coming to terms with these things is not something you can achieve in an afternoon. It's a slip-slide, two-steps-forward-one-step-back process (as you know already).