So upset

[jenk1]

We asked the specialist psych who dx,d DS to do an asessment on DD in nursery, the SENCO and early years HV were trying to convince us that every thing was ok when we knew deep down it wasnt.

Its not good.

He said DD wanders around looking confused and lost, shee has a blank look on her face, he saw her being "bullied"- if you can call it that at age nearly 3 by another little boy who took her toys off her and she couldnt tell her key worker who had her back to her, he said she just imitates other children and repeats things all the time.
He also said there is no structure or routine to her day, she went outside, pushed a pram around and then went back inside.
We told nursery this last month, they disagreed, but now he has noticed this he is going to provide a report and come to the next meeting, we are also going to tell the developmental paed cos ive given up on SLT, they wont return calls or provide a report of the asessment they did back in December 06 of DD.

I am so upset, im trying not to show it in front of DS but i want to ball my eyes out, its obvious that she hasnt been getting the support she needs.
The psych also said there are loads of staff and that as she is on early years action plus that she should be getting some 1-2-1 time.
that i have to send her there, i only did so cos i cant cope with the 2 of them while DS is out of school, but the moment he gets back in im reducing her hours right down.

[Mitchell81]

I am so sorry Jenk

[kitegirl]

jenk1 so sorry for you and your DD. No wonder you are upset. No advise but just wanted to add my support - we are going through the same thing (have just found out that DS has spent the past several months in nursery pushing a train around on his own). Hope you'll give the nursery a kicking.

[Chocol8]

Hi Jenk, so for you and dd. Agree if she is on school action plus that she should be getting some one to one time, possibly more in the playground like my ds used to have.

The positive thing is that this has been noticed reasonably early and can now be nipped in the bud. It sounds like you have some great support in the specialist psych and i am sure this will be worth its weight in gold in the long run.

Maybe tonight when they're all in bed, you can have a good cry but i'm sure now this has been noticed, there is an answer and help will be given. (((hug)))

[sphil]

So sorry you've had to hear this Jenk, but it's good you know. I know if DS2 didn't have 1:1 at nursery he would just wander about aimlessly.

The things that have helped him are

a visual timetable which his 1:1 goes through with him at the start of every session and takes him back to as each activity finishes.

a 'special box' of sensory toys which she uses to encourage interaction with her and other children

regular activities that are always the same - songs, rhymes, a jumping game etc.


Maybe you could ask your psych to recommend something like this for DD in his report (obviously designed with her abilities in mind, which I know are very different from DS2's).

Do your early years team ever go in and make visits?

[jenk1]

Ha, Early years, at the last meeting the lady poo poohed the asessment that the CDC has done on DD, her dx of developmental delay,left sided weakness,echolalic speech,lack of pretend play skills-all pointing to ASD.

She says that DD doesnt display these symptoms but she,s not experienced enough to spot them.

Im waiting for his report and then ill be calling a meeting.

[sphil]

I mean 'it's good that you know' not 'it's good, you know' !!!

[sphil]

Oh God, it does sound like you're surrounded by incompetent people! We've had our share but Early Years have been good. Although I do remember a woman coming to us in the very early days - since retired - who looked at me pityingly every time I told her something that Ds2 could do - in those days I was desperate for him NOT to have ASD. She never smiled - DS2 hated her!

[jenk1]

(have just found out that DS has spent the past several months in nursery pushing a train around on his own). Hope you'll give the nursery a kicking.

Kitegirl-

Its so annoying, at DD,s nursery there are loads of staff, why arent they giving her the help that she needs, i said to the psych surely she should have some as isnt early plus funded and he said yes but they are probably spending the money on employing more staff, theres too many staff he said.