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SN children

advice on autism please

19 replies

Sassymom · 02/02/2007 20:34

new to mumsnet.friend told me about it, said it was very helpful. posted this in behavior/development & was redirected here. sorry to post the same question 2xs on the same website, not sure how to delete the origianl. So here goes.....I just found out my middle child is has a form of autism spectrum. he is 4.
I already saw the dr & everything
have him set up with speech/occupational therapy.
Any advice on home life? I heard to keep his diet gluten/casien free, anyone have a grocery list to get me started?
Maybe just advice, If anyone else out there has been going through it can you just give me tips/ pointers on anything related.
I would definantly appreciate it. Thanks.

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coppertop · 02/02/2007 20:58

Welcome to the SN board.

I have 2 boys with autism (6yrs and 4yrs). I don't know anything about the gluten/casein side of things but would be glad to offer any help/advice on other issues.

Have you been told about claiming DLA for your ds?

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mummy2aaron · 02/02/2007 21:01

Hiya. I also have a son with autism age 4 in a couple of weeks. Hard to advise unless you give more info on his particular 'quirks' for want of a better word. You have come to the right place - there is always lots of support on here.

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Sassymom · 02/02/2007 21:03

Thanks for the welcome/responce.

I'm not sure what claiming DLA is.
I'm in America, forgot to mention that. Sorry.
I would love some advice, just how do you keep it together. Are your boys on a schedule? Anything you do that shows an improvement with autism? Do you have alot of help at home?

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Sassymom · 02/02/2007 21:11

ok mummytoaaron, thanks for responding.

he is a really good boy, affectionate, so I was surpirsed to get the diagnosis. I thought he would be adhd to be honest. ummm, very active (bviously) trows tantrums, dosent listen, likes t play on the computer. poor communication skills.


I also have a 7 yr old with adhd & a newborn..... not sure how to keep it together, just wondering if there was a certian way to gain order into our home.

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onlyjoking9329 · 02/02/2007 21:11

Hi and welcome, i have three kids with autism so i know a little about it

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Sassymom · 02/02/2007 21:11

sorry about the spelling, my computer is acting up

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coppertop · 02/02/2007 21:13

Ah, so DLA isn't relevant then.

We use visual timetables a lot. These are timetables using basic pictures or symbols so that ds1 and ds2 can see what is going to happen next. It helped a lot with reducing their stress about routines etc.

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coppertop · 02/02/2007 21:15

I also have a dd who is 10mths old I know how tricky it can be. Generally I've found it easier to have dd fitting into their routine rather than the other way around. It's not always possible though so it's a case of doing what you can when you can really.

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Sassymom · 02/02/2007 21:15

ok. Im guessing when he starts therapy they will explain that right?
How long have your boys been diagnosed?

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Sassymom · 02/02/2007 21:18

oh wow. youre a supermom! i just found out. trying to get a routine in my family is not seeming to work at the moment. guess it may take a while. any tips to get any of them into a schedule?

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Sassymom · 02/02/2007 21:19

hi onlyjoking... how are you?
any tips you can give?

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QueenEagle · 02/02/2007 21:23

Hi sassymom

ds3 who has just turned 4 has recently been given a provisional diagnosis of asd. He does the following:

Lines things up
Walks on tiptoes
Likes things done his way
Poor speech but excellent comprehension
Poor toileting skills
His current fixation is Scooby bloody Doo
Hates change
Mega meltdowns when things don't go his way
Everything must be NOW, not at any point in the future
Likes order, dislikes it when other people do things he doesn't "approve" of - this stresses him enormously
Tantrums like you wouldn't believe - actually you lot WOULD!! Most people in RL don't!


We try not to be rigid with him, we allow him to choose what happens when as much as possible. It's been hard to get my older sons to accept he is different and can't be treated like my younger ds.

Have never heard about the diet thing - what does that mean then, cutting out certain things?

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onlyjoking9329 · 02/02/2007 21:31

well we have a lot of routine in this house!
no two days are ever the same! never give up trying, things do get better the more we do things, teeth brushing used to be a nightmare so we brushed teeth 6 times a day for a while,same with finger nails used to cut one a day til they were ok with it, went to hairdressers once a week for a month and now they are all ok with it, still have major probs with dentist and shoe fitters thou

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coppertop · 02/02/2007 21:34

Here's an old thread with some ideas for setting up a timetable

I think any routine you try will need to be realistic. It's nice in theory to decide that meals/activities will be at an exact time but in practice you'll probably end up tearing your hair out with stress. Start with the usual everyday stuff like school/pre-school and choose a routine around those which is workable, eg here ds1 always has breakfast when he first gets up, then gets dressed and then brushes teeth etc. He gets up at different times but the order stays the same. For other activities I put the relevant symbol on the timetable and say, for example, "breakfast then bus then see doctor". Keep explanations in simple language "X then Y then Z".

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mummy2aaron · 02/02/2007 22:05

Oh honey you have your hands full. My son is very affectionate too and I also think he has adhd but we are waiting to hear from that. I also have an elder son age 8 and a daughter 19 months.

Routine is very important in our house, it helps my son feel secure. I adhere to it as much as possible but when we have school/nursery holidays he is really hard to manage. He is always on the go and is very violent/aggressive and hits out a lot. e also have a lot of damage to the house.

If you can;t have a complete routine for the day - have lots of little ones - bedtime for example we have specific tv programme/bath/story/bed. In the morning we have breakfast/play/washed & dressed/school. We break it up into lots of little routines. If we go shopping it is to the same supermarket everytime and he gets specific items for me each time - heaven forbid the shop revamping the aisles lol. Language is simplified as he has communication problems - he she we is non-existent - it is always the name of the person e.g. 'Jack wants juice?' or 'Mummy get book' etc - I never give him a choice it is too complicated and then if he couldn;t find the words to ask for, for example orange juice or blackcurrant he would have a meltdown so he always has the same flavour.

Not sure if any of this helps but it's just how I manage - I think we all just find what works best for our particular child.

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Sassymom · 03/02/2007 00:55

i appreciate it guys. thank you so much.



& Queeneagle .. the diet is cutting out dairy & gluten wheats... im still just learning right now. so Im not sure from experience. I am going by what Ive seen so far on the net. Heard good things though.

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Sassymom · 03/02/2007 01:00

just checked out www.gfcfdiets.com
Apparently the diet works.

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mummy2aaron · 03/02/2007 06:50

Hiya, It may be worth getting a test done to see if your son has gluten/casein intolerance first.

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Sassymom · 05/02/2007 17:16

I might have to do that. I just found out so Im wanting to try everything right now.
Trying to get the kids in a schedule atm...very interesting.

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