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Someone said something really minor to me and I feel like crying

(6 Posts)
gatorgolf Sat 09-Jan-16 21:02:13

Yes I know I need to grow a thicker skin, I'm usually ok but someone has just said something that hit a nerve.

My ds age 5 is right at the start of being assesses for asd. I'm not sure if he is or not but school year one have brought it up. I've always had thoughts at back of my mind, it previously got brought up by pre school age 2. Anyway won't go into the detail on this.

The thing that has upset me is that we were out and ds was playing with another little boy who is abit older and they were playing fine. This boy is also currently being assessed for asd but, and I don't mean to offend anyone by this, but he has more obvious sn and I wasn't surprised he was being assessed whereas with ds unless you spend a lot of time with him you wouldn't know his quirks and most people would be surprised if I told them.

Anyway then another younger boy came along and he wanted to play on the video game, up to this point ds had just been watching the older boy. Then they all start arguing as ds wanted a go as well so the older boy throws it down at ds. We were the only parents in the room then the younger boys grandmother comes in about a minute later and says that ds should let the older boy have ago. I said well he has already just had a turn for about half an hour and she said to me "well he is autistic". I've not told anyone about ds being assessed so fair enough they wouldn't know but could have cried. So ends up with ds having a fit cuss one of his things is he can't cope with things if they aren't fair so we just came home and I feel like the worst parent in the world.

Anyway I know I should get a thicker skin but should wanted to get this off my chest

Frusso Sat 09-Jan-16 21:43:58

Rant away. You're at that uncertain stage, and you emotions will be close to the surface.
If it wasn't the parent/grandparent of the older boy they were just being busybodies. People like to do that without actually understanding either child involved.

gatorgolf Sat 09-Jan-16 22:08:33

Thanks frisso it's so much easier to vent to people I don't know on mn then to speak to people in real life, the grandmother in question I do actually know quite well and she is only in her 40s but she does grate on me sometimes as she thinks her kids and grandkids are perfect and they are far from it!!! And I always feel like she's judging our parenting, she would be the type that if I said ds was being assessed she would say it was us trying to make excuses for his behaviour and there is nothing wrong with him

Frusso Sat 09-Jan-16 22:28:47

There's always one or two like her. Usually best avoided when you're feeling sensitive. Although it sounds like you've got her sussed out already.

zzzzz Sat 09-Jan-16 22:54:15

It's horrid having to go home. It's horrid having to hear someone criticize how you are handling things, and it's horrid to see your son upset when he didn't really have to be.

No one would have enjoyed that. Anyone would have felt upset.

brew cake and it WILL get easier.

gatorgolf Sat 09-Jan-16 22:57:47

Thanks for the coffee and cakes zzzzz but I sent dh out for wine so that is chilling me out !!!!

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