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AS child hurting classmates

(2 Posts)
peppajay Wed 07-Oct-15 23:20:51

My son is 7 and currently being assessed for aspergers. Since the start of term we have had lots of incidences of him hurting children. The 'hurting' usually occurs if the child is doing something that he percieves as wrong. Last week he hit a little girl with a pencil as she was colouring the sky red and should be blue and at the beginning of the week, he pulled a classmates hair to get her in the line after playtime. We have had several other little incidents - Apart from the hitting the child with the pencil incident I have never been called into the classroom - I know about these incidents from the mums of the children he has hurt. Apart from one mum who really laid into me the other mums have been really nice about it. However when I talk to him he has absolutely no knowledge and cannot remember doing anything to these children (being autistic he is so so honest!!) when I name the child and tell him what he has done he is completely adamant he hasn't HURT them - he admits to doing what these mums have said he has done but in his eyes it isn't hurting. They are such little incidents that the teacher doesn't even seem aware of what is going on. I have asked her to keep an eye on him and try to intervene if she sees anything about to happen. He also says children get him into trouble for things he hasn't done so I wonder if some of the things he really says he can't remember doing are children jumping on the bandwagon and exaggerating an incident as they know he will get told off. Just wondered if anyone had been in a similar situation with an AS child and what the outcome was. Thanks

PolterGoose Thu 08-Oct-15 08:26:42

A couple of thoughts:

He may not understand he is hurting because he can't feel the hurt, that was definitely the case with my ds

Ask the nice parents to please report any incidents to the teacher, and to ask their children to report too. At one point I found out that a couple of ds's classmates weren't telling teacher because they didn't want ds to get in trouble! Of course, this meant teacher couldn't see that ds was anxious. So I asked them to explain to their children that the teacher needs to know so they can help ds.

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