Help! DS1 keeps waking in the night...

[Pages]

He is 4 and has GDD. He is quite mobile but has no speech. He has always been a pretty good sleeper, we have always just put him down and let him get himself off to sleep with no fuss.

About 3 weeks ago we took the cot sides off his bed and put a stairgate in the doorway, so that he could get out of bed by himself in the morning and play with his toys. Trouble is he has started doing it in the middle of the night! Suddenly the whole house is woken by him playing his piano, tipping all his books out onto the floor or just leaping round the room making whooping noises. I have tried taking his favourite toys away but he just finds something else or will even just sit in the middle of the room doing nothing. I can't leave him as I am afraid he will freeze.

I know he is really pleased at his new found freedom after being "caged" for so long (and I really don't want to go back to putting the cot sides on as it does seem an infringement at his age as well as a step back) but equally we all need a good night's sleep, not least of all him.

The last two nights I have been up and down with him for a couple of hours but every time I put him back in he waits till I have gone and gets out again. I am sure he understands that he is being naughty because he laughs at me but he doesn't have the vocabulary or comprehension for me to verbally discipline him.

It is also a bit of a problem getting him to bed. Where he always went at 7.30 and slept through till 6 or 7 he is now not going until 8 or 9 and has to be woken in the morning.

Any ideas?

He sometimes has a very short daytime sleep btw but not always and there doesn't seem to be a link. It may be that his covers are falling off and that is waking him.

[caroline3]

Hi Pages, sorry you are having problems with ds. I am not an expert in sleep by any means but my ds has had a lot of problems with this in the past.

He never goes to sleep before 9.00 pm at the earliest(aged 6). Other parents disapprove of this but that is ds and I have found it easier to adjust my expectations rather than try and enforce an earlier bedtime. He always used to wake up in the night at least once and sometimes more. I found the easiest way of getting him back to sleep was taking him into my own bed and giving him a cuddle. The lights were off and he got to realise that nothing else was going to happen. If I tried to make him go back to sleep in his bedroom we would have been up for hours. Your ds was probably waking up before but realised he could not get out so went back to sleep, now he realises he can have some fun in his room!

[Pages]

Thanks Caroline. Does your DS have SN? I'm not sure if this is normal behaviour (ie for NT children) when the cot sides are first removed and whether it will pass... I have always tried to avoid bringing my dc into bed with me because much as I love the cuddles I have heard it can become a bit of a habit.

[caroline3]

Pages, Hi my ds has AS and ADD. I know what you mean about getting into a habit. My DS often sleeps in the same bed as me and if he is in his own bed he usually does get up in the night still. However he just get into bed with me now and goes straight off to sleep, often I don't wake up. I know this is not ideal but I was having too many sleepless nights and I daresay he won't be doing this for too many more years. He does seem to having the odd night where he sleeps right through but that has only started happening recently.

The other suggestions I have are having a tape with relaxing music to stick on and making sure that is absolutely nothing for ds to play with when he does wake up. Toughing it out might well produce results eventually, I just did not have the energy to devote the time necessary to try and wean ds off this. Good luck!!

[sphil]

Hi Pages
My DS2 who has ASD goes through periods of doing exactly what you describe. It's got much better since he went on a gluten free diet, but he still does it from time to time.
We dress him in a sleepsuit on cold nights (Vertbaudet do them for 4 yr olds and upwards). Then if he gets out of bed we don't worry that he's cold. We only go into him if he sounds distressed (or we smell a smell, but that's another story...)

[Pages]

Thanks, I will google Vertbaudet. I know what you mean Caroline, I don't blame you - sometimes you have to take the path of least resistance.

I took every single toy out of DS's room before he went to bed tonight and have put him in a sleeping bag and - miracle! - he was asleep by 8. But I am still not holding my breath...