What should I be asking the school for please help

[Tibet]

My ds has been dx HFA. I have been seeing the school senco for years about his problems but she isn't very good I think she was just thrown into the job by HT and although she is lovely she doesn't really know a lot of what she should she has even said this to me herself. In the past she has just pushed the issues to being because ds is shy or quiet or let's see how he is in year 2 and then lets see how he is in year 3.
I googled my ds problems into google one day and the moment I read the NAS website I knew my ds had autism. I went to my gp who I had seen in the past about social issues and other things with ds and he referred us to a Paed. As the Paed said 18 months waiting list for CDAC I had private Tests done including the ADOS and ds got a dx of HFA. We are due to see the Paed again next month.
However since getting the dx I went to school again to see senco to discuss. Senco told me that ds was already on sen register and getting extra support with maths writing and literacy. I was shocked that they had never told me this before. They have recognised his social interaction problems and have given him a card to use in the playground for when he is feeling alone or unable to solve a problem with friends.
They agreed to do an IEP for my ds. This was over one month ago and still no notification of any IEP going forward so I'm seeing them again on the morning to talk about getting this drawn up ASAP. My ds had a SALT go into ther school to talk about strategies and is kw apparently being discharged following CDAC and says that the school need to follow the recommend statergies.
I am confused as to what I should be doing for my ds, should I just wait and see how the IEP helps. They have said they will direct it towards social issues aswell as academic. Please can anyone offer some advice as I'm not really sure what I should be doing and when.

[AttilaTheMeerkat]

You are your son's best - and only - advocate here.

I would be applying for a Statement from the LEA in such circumstances as soon as possible. Look at IPSEA's website //www.ipsea.org.uk as there are model letters on there you can use. You would need to write to the Chief Education Officer at your LEA and give them six weeks to reply. This website is also a mine of information re special educational needs in school.

This school either cannot or will not help your child as it stands currently. They at the very best seem incompetent and are out of their depth with regards to your son. I would be looking at other schools as well now.

If they have not as yet drawn up an IEP (btw this should be done as well with you present and not just handed to you termly) then I would not wait to see if any IEP helps. You'll be waiting indefinitely and you cannot afford to delay any longer now.

[Tibet]

Thank you Attila for your reply.
Am I allowed to apply for statement process if I haven't exhausted the schools help first. Will they not raise the issue that the school have offered to do an IEP which I haven't yet given a chance. The school have told me they cannot afford any further help and I will get this clarified tomorrow. His private dx recommended 1:1 support . School said no way there is no funding. Again I will get all this clarified tomorrow. I really want to look for a new school and there are a few locally that have units that will help my ds but ds wouldn't cope with the change. It has taken him 4 years to settle where he is. He is in year 2 . Started in nursery. Still not completely at ease.
I thought that a statement could only be applied for if I had exhausted all the school can offer through its resources .
I'm so worried about ds - especially as he is going in to juniors next term.

[Tibet]

Also senco said there is no way ds will get statement as there are far worse than him who can't get statements. I got offended by this comment as whether there a far worse or not and I am sure there are my ds is entitled to the help he needs. I think because he is well behaved at school they are not bothered about him he is not disrupting their classes.

[kafkesque]

Go with your instincts girl!

There are a few more threads on here that tell of blantant prerehearsed
county lieing. Don't listen to it. I did for four years and now wishing I hadn't.

As soon as I took them all the way to tribunal and they conceded.

Go for they statement ASAP there is a lot advice re statementing templates ect on here.

Just start and good luck. there will be a few more people along here who will hold your hand all the way through it.

Mumsnetpower!

[AttilaTheMeerkat]

Hi Tibet

Simply put Tibet, you've been lied to throughout by this school and they are failing him abjectly here. They cannot or equally will not help your son. This shower have not even put an IEP in place for him, not that any IEP they wrote would be worth squat anyway.

If he is indeed quiet and compliant his additional needs will be ignored within a classroom as is happening here.

If I had £1 for every time I have read similar on here to what you have been told (especially the part about others who have supposedly greater needs not receiving statements) I'd be quite wealthy by now.

You can go straight to statement without being on either School Action or School Action Plus first. I would certainly apply for the statement asap as well as finding him another school. This one even if he did have a statement in place do not want to know.

Would also suggest you contact IPSEA as a matter of course via their website to get further advice re your son.

You are truly his best - and only - advocate here.

[AttilaTheMeerkat]

You need to act also because he (and by turn you) could find Junior school very hard with its unwritten rules and social codes. He could well start bottling up all the frustrations of the school day only to take it all out on you when he gets home.

The private dx you obtained also recommended 1:1 support; the surest way of obtaining that is through a statement doc. Also such things are legally binding.

Statements can take around 6 months plus to set up as well.

[tryingtokeepintune]

It is a good idea to start your paper trail now.

Write to them confirming that you met and discussed your ds's issues over a month ago and ask about the IEP that they agreed to do and that you are still waiting for.

Ask them to confirm that there is no funding and no further help for the 1:1 recommended by his dx.

Also that you understood that Senco said your son will not get a statement as there are people far worse off who cannot get one.

Better to use bullet point in your email so they cannot pick and choose which points they want to answer without making it obvious which they are ignoring.

It is best to have written evidence now in case they 'forget' hat they said. It might come I useful when you apply for your statement.

[kafkesque]

yes good point ask them to put it in writing. If it's a wrong phrase I bet they won't.

[Tibet]

Ok thank you I am going to do all
Of the above. I have just been in the bath for an hour reading the school funding reform and like you say I cannot believe how they have fobbed me off.
With regards to ds taking out his frustrations at home he is already doing this , I reported it to my gp who has requested he is seen urgently by the Paed. Since around march he is very violent at home and he never used to be and I am talking really awful stuff which I know I not the only one experiencing he is frequently throwing and kicking and hitting us all whenever he is frustrated or has to change a task. Ie dressing, bathing, going to bed etc. I am at my witts end sometimes I cry he is up all night doing this, amazingly tonight he has just settled but most nights it goes on till past midnight.
I have admittedly been scared to start the SA process but you have all given me the courage to do so. I'm still worries the school will slam something down on me and say this is it you are not entitled to x y and z.

[Tibet]

Can I ask you about something else too...the recent SALT he saw says that ...it is anticapted with the stratergys given below (which are about verbal prompts, connextives, inference questions, topic maintenace and turn taking and that the school continue with their support systems already in place) incidentally which are what I don't know....she goes on to say ds's expression of language will continue to develop in a postive manner. he presents some atypical social interaction skills that request further assessment at CDAC. it is agreed that he receive one visit to school to ensure all statergies are in place in the school setting. Following this his language and communication will be monitored and it is anticipated he will not require 1:1 therapy and will be discharged following CDAC.
I am not impressed with her report as she has said things like he was able to I terrier emotions from looking at pictures and explained why someone might feel a certain emotion linking it to his own experiences. This is not true she was prompting him a lot and he can no way link it to his own experiences. It also says that he used appropriate eye contact which she actually said to me over the telephone after the appointment that he did not but as it was a short meeting it was hard to tell. She also says there are no concerns regarding his expression of language and that his understanding of language is within normal limits.
What on earth is she going on about? I have spent money on private tests stating exactly the opposite which is clear to all why on earth is she saying the complete opposite. Plus she was prompting his a lot and the whole time he sat there twiddling with a peice of string which she even pointed out to me and asked if he always does that then she writes that he had no problem with concentration.
It's all very weird I have asked her to call me about it and I think she will tomorrow.

[Tibet]

The private dx has recommended amongst other things that classroom 1:1 is needed to support ds and group speech therapy. Will I have a hope in hell if the salt is not even on our side as well as the school with the statement. Should I get an independant salt on first? Should I not worry about this salt report. Sorry for all these questions but I'm in such a tizz about all this and I don't have the knowledge to help which is so frustrating. I'm going to speak to ipsea - thanks all

[popgoestheweezel]

I would ask the salt these exact questions in writing and ask for a written response. Write in a spirit of genuine enquiry saying you are confused by this part of the report as you observed ds doing x at the time etc etc.
You seem to be surrounded by lots of 'professionals' with slightly dodgy attitudes but you'll probably find that being called to account in writing will be helpful.

[Tibet]

Ok I will - thank you.