What is the point of a CAF/TAC meeting?

[KatyMac]

How is it intended to work?

Is it of benefit? If so how?

[phlebas]

well we're going through the CAF process atm - have been for months - because nursery want couple of hours 1-1 funding. I've just had the form returned from the LA because I refused to answer anything I didn't consider to be relevant to getting 2 hours a week (90% of the questions). I'm not sure they serve any purpose tbh - just a load of waffle & intrusion.

[KatyMac]

We have one but the professionals meeting was a result of the CAF

I have a meeting on Friday & so far I have written
"Why are we having a CAF meeting? All the decisions are being made without my, my husband?s or my daughter?s consent or agreement, why am I even here?

Decisions I had put into place or instigated have been removed or cancelled as a result of a professionals meeting.

I have no written evidence that the course of action which has been decided upon is effective. It goes against all instinct and in fact the evidence proves the opposite to be true."

Obviously it need work & amending & adding to but I'm feeling a bit ignored & abandoned atm

[KatyMac]

OK

So far I have:
"Why are we having a CAF meeting?

All the decisions are being made without my, my husband?s or my daughter?s consent or agreement, why am I even here? Decisions I had put into place or instigated have been removed or cancelled as a result of a professionals meeting.

? I have sought emotional support for DD through a charity for VI children. They have been told not to let DD attend and removed the youth worker who had arranged to see DD throughout the summer.
? I instigated a 121 for DD through the single area panel, this has been stopped
? I have been told to stop her drumming and singing lessons ? I haven?t as I don?t see them as connected to her sight.

I keep being told I need CBT despite the lady I was sent to suggesting that I need emotional support rather than CBT. I have since arranged this for myself as the GP seemed incapable or unwilling to help.

I have no written evidence that the course of action which has been decided upon is effective. It goes against all instinct and in fact the evidence proves the opposite to be true, which can be seen by my evidence, that of my father and independent evidence provided by TJ."

My report on DD

"During the holidays DD has appeared happy and bubbly. She seems to enjoy Drumming, music lessons & socialising with her friends although she misses joining in with Look activities. She hasn?t read, or participated in any ?close work? although she enjoyed a drama summer school and several dancing events. Her sight seemed to remain at the level it was at the end of last term.

Whilst on our family holiday she struggled with the new environment and often bumped into things or got ?lost?.

As a return to school approached she has seemed more and more anxious and she has showed fear of attending school and frustration that she must attend. She has reported to her Grandmother that she is ?always? being teased and that she hates it. Her sight has also been observably worse, although not as bad as it was in March, it seems definitely worse than it was in July."

My Dad's thoughts:
"DD

These appear to be facts or factually based opinion on the basis of our knowledge:

1. There is nothing physically wrong with DD?s eyes.
   

1. Her reported perception of sight was improving during the late term and summer school holidays, though it remained poor at close distances.
   

1. It may have deteriorated close to the end of the holidays and into the new term though her mid-distance and long sight remains improved. Unless DD is an actor of consummate skill her sight in relation to close work remains very poor and functionally inadequate for much of her schoolwork.
   

1. From the early onset of improvement her parents have accepted that, notwithstanding their concerns about a possible physical cause for DD?s loss of visual acuity there was little medically to do except to accept the diagnosis of a physiological disorder.
   

1. DD has apparently been entirely happy with all her out of school activities. She has proved a real talent at the drumming lessons and enjoys this activity. She has related to the LOOK outings and events as social occasions rather than anything that mark her out as special. The ?Belle Indifference? syndrome seems to remain firmly rooted.
   

1. She has complained to her Grandmother about boys teasing her at school about whether she can really see or not. This appears not to be based on an isolated example but she will not provide detail. Her Grandmother is taking the view that she should simply try and ignore these events, as her indifference to them is most likely to persuade them to desist.
   

1. She is less happy at school than she was last term.
   

1. Katymac has discussed her attitudes and behaviour with the referred cognitive therapy practitioner who can see no value in this therapy, as the therapist does not believe that Katymac?s behaviours or concerns are irrational. (This tends to reinforce the opinion of the family psychologist that Kate?s conduct has been rational within a very disturbing set of events and that little has been done to try and sympathise with her position or allay her concerns. May not include this bit
   

1. It is concerning to the family that the meeting of ?professionals?, which we understand recommended the withdrawal of support and the discontinuance of any extra-curricula activity which DD may relate to her sight, has not provided to the family any evidence based reason for their conclusions or any particular advice on how she is to continue without support at school.
   

10. Our belief is that the school has been the most pro-active and consistent source of help and support. Furthermore the school?s knowledge of DD is such that they are probably best placed to determine what and how much specialist and general support she requires. I am afraid that my own experience of specialist medical services is that they too often operate without due regard to the context in which they deliver their opinions and operate their protocols."

TJ's
"improving and DD has settled back into school, as I did notice that when I came to visit you at the beginning of the Summer for your unannounced visit she seemed very content but was very subdued when I came at the end of the Summer." from an email

[KatyMac]

"I keep being told I need CBT despite the lady I was sent to suggesting that I need emotional support rather than CBT. I have since arranged this for myself as the GP seemed incapable or unwilling to help."

The CBT lady has been approached by the head of the CAF, and all of a sudden I do need it

[orsinian]

You are heading for a false accusation of MSBP/FII.

It's a virtual certainty. Cognitive Behavior Therapy, then the report, then a 'suspicion raised' and then wham! Go direct to MSBP/FII World, if for nothing else but to get you to be quiet.

I don't mind being proven wrong, but la belle indifference is classed as a factitious disorder and there has been a tendency in the last decade to determine that women cause such disorders, in a similar fashion to the idea in the UK that women cause autism (look up Bruno Bettleheim and autism in Google). The old 'Refrigerator Mom' concept has been replaced by something much more pernicious.

And Evidence Based Research is absolutely a 'bad phrase' amongst UK professionals; they absolutely do not like that phrase and it gets a lot of them a bit cross.

[roundthebend4]

Oh that sounds familar I was scared put my wits as seemed wAs heading for same accusation cp the lot to stop me asking for resources was not sw that tried it was the resource team leader who never even met ds or us and a shitty paed we seen once oh and hv that's been offering support lol she seen us once in March

Till thank feck neuro and orthopeadics and the salt even the physio waded in even sw on our side and said ffsshe is notAdd your message here (See our Talk guidelines)
making him disabled he is and now seems all gone now all of a suddern that ov yes ds is disabled

but I won't ever trust anyone again in the proffesional world and will prefer to go it alone

[KatyMac]

Oh - OK

& how worried do I need to be?

[KatyMac]

You see - I am worried abut this

I'm writing it all down but I can't show them/give it in because I am too scared

[KatyMac]

I think choosing to do the CAF while I have PMT is quite brave; doing it the week the hospital has announced DH is going back in for a fortnight is again brave or foolish

Instead of:
I have no written evidence that the course of action which has been decided upon is effective. It goes against all instinct and in fact the evidence proves the opposite to be true, which can be seen by my evidence, that of my father and independent evidence provided by TJ

How about:
? When my aunt was diagnosed with cancer, my dad with a slipped disc, my brother with rheumatoid arthritis, I immediately went on line to find out causes, prognoses, treatments; all of which I have found however I have no written evidence that the course of action which has been decided upon is standard or effective. It goes against all instinct and in fact the evidence proves the opposite to be true, which can be seen by my evidence, that of my father and independent evidence provided by TJ

??

[KatyMac]

stressing again

[mariagoretti]

....worried enough to request that they have your family and your daughter assessed by someone in child and family psychology or child protection who really knows about somatising / factitious illness / MBP / conversion disorders (preferably all of the above)... don't wait for SS to cobble something together when they decide it's an emergency and can only get a non-expert.

It may be helpful to say that you and your husband and the grandparents would like support and strategies in helping to overcome dd's psychological barriers to recovery, and ensuring that there are no underlying family dynamics or unacknowleged anxieties contributing.

DO NOT risk suggesting that anyone is incompetent (even if you think they are), do not appear to be angry (even when you have good reason), do not appear to be needy (even when you are and it's someone else's fault) as social services may consider that to be evidence you're in denial / unbalanced etc...

[roundthebend4]

yes and most of all take someone with you a to keep record of whats said and b to say ok we need a 5 minute break if they think your close to losing it

[KatyMac]

But everyone who was independent went to the professionals meeting & has never been seen since

I am by myself - My dad is with my aunt (the one with cancer) my mum is more emotional than I am, DH is due to go into papworth so he is quite poorly

[KatyMac]

If my cousin arrives from Australia in time & my dad can drive back he will come

Otherwise my mum might she will just get upset

[KatyMac]

I don't know who else I could take - the lady from the charity backed off, the Parent Support Adviser is the lead professional so no help there

My ladies have to cover for me as I'm not at work & DH is poorly

[KatyMac]

Do you know I've been pretty calm, chilled etc & this looms after DD talks about bullying & I get paranoid & hysterical again - how pathetic

[daisy5678]

Not pathetic - crappy situation. Good luck.

[roundthebend4]

Good luck if lived nearer would offer to come hold your hand

stay calm,foccused and in control take as much evidence as you can and keep note of main bullet points of who said agreed to do what then get people to sign AT the meeting