Son to be in SEN register

(5 Posts)
Lalis182 Tue 26-Jan-16 15:34:43

Hello everyone,

My son is 7 and in year 2, he has always been very active and found no interest in reading nor writing he just didn't enjoy sitting down when he could be doing other stuff that were more fun when he was younger. He does need glasses for reading and looking things close. His teacher called me in one day and told me he was going to be put into the SEN register so i was a little confused, i knew he was getting some "support" from another teacher but i was never told he was way below the "average" as every parent evening i was told was that he is such a sociable boy, very helpful, etc. remarking how good he was at other stuff but i was never made aware the extent of the problem.

Last November i asked son if he was using his glasses at school and he said no i don't remember the last time i did so i went to talk to his teacher after school one day i worked from home and they were not aware my son needed glasses. This means that since i gave them to his teacher in year 1, god know how long he had wore them and they got lost and i was never informed so i assumed they were passed on to his year 2 teacher when he went up to year 2.

Last December when i was told he was going to be put into the SEN register i went to speak the so called teacher that gives him extra support and told her i thought was appealing how the school had lost son's glasses and if i wouldn't have asked about them no one would of known. Three teachers plus the so call SENCO teacher failed to identify he needed glasses and therefore fell behind. I am sad as they have failed him and i am very angry the school now wants to put him into the SEN register. My son's confidence when reading is shattered as you can imagine, just picture yourself not being able to see properly and being asked to read??

Since i found they had lost his glasses and he was tested again and his eyes have deteriorated slightly and he has new glasses which i have passed on his teacher and stressed the fact that they are in their care.

I have also put my son with a tutor to help him gain confidence and i spend about an hour to two hours doing work with him in order to bring him up to speed. I have noticed a lot of improvement but i am still very annoyed with his school and i want to complain to someone as i believe they have failed him immensely.

I have parents evening on the 11th February and i was given until the half term by the SENCO teacher for my son to improve before he gets into the SEN register but i do not think he should as it was not his fault his confidence was shattered by the lack of glasses when he was learning and trying to read, he is good at other subjects such maths etc so i believe he being behind is purely because of the lack of glasses.

But surely they can't expect him to catch up a whole year from December to mid February? I work full time and i do a part time master degree and i still make time to do work with my poor 7 year old son every day without a fail in order to help him as i will not give up and will not let the schools inability to care for him bring him down. His school has a so called outstanding ofsted report, anyone can advice who to go to in order to complain? You do not know how much it breaks my heart that he thinks he is "silly" because he is doing extra work with me and not doing other stuff children his age are just because the school lost his glasses.

Thank you for your advice.

GruntledOne Thu 28-Jan-16 15:21:31

I don't understand how you didn't know that the glasses were lost? Surely he needed them at home as well as at school, given that he should be practising his reading and doing his homework at home? Why are you concerned that he could not see what he is reading at school when the same must have applied at home? Or haven't you been doing any reading with him? If so, it's not surprising if he's fallen behind. I'm amazed the teacher is prepared to take responsibility for the glasses at all, given that she has 29 other children to sort out. I had glasses at that age and was perfectly able to put them on and take them off when needed without having a teacher hand the glasses to me.

You seem to regard being put on the SEN register as some sort of punishment or stigma: it really isn't. All that it means is that they are recognising that he needs a bit more support. If or when he gets back on track he will come off the register. Honestly, it's a positive thing and will only help him.

PrimeDirective Thu 28-Jan-16 15:44:53

Does he have a second pair of glasses at home? Most kids have the same pair that goes to school and home again every day so you would know the same day if they were lost. Is he supposed to wear them all the time or just for reading?
The SEN register is just an acknowledgement that his needs are greater than can be met without some additional support. It's not a criticism, they are not expecting him to make a whole load of progress in a short time, they are just preparing to give him extra support if he needs it - that's a good thing.
A 7yr old should be capable of knowing that he needs glasses and have somewhere to put them in school. It's not normally down to the teacher to look after them.

AuditAngel Thu 28-Jan-16 16:32:26

I do understand how the glasses were not missed. DD1 was not allowed to read after school as they thought she was suffering from eye strain. It was quite a while before I found out they were missing.

NWgirls Fri 29-Jan-16 19:13:09

OP, you need to embrace (or at least accept) the SEN label if the school thinks it is appropriate - don't you want him to get help and attention if/when he needs it? It is not some form of punishment or stigma!

SEN does not mean "stupid" or whatever you worry about. It is a flag that helps (you and) them make him a priority. Is not that exactly what you want, so he can catch up?

My DD (8) recently got the "SEN" label, and I am delighted:
- she gets regular extra support in a small group of (3 kids with one teacher)
- she has also had two assessments (OT, dyslexia screening) that have been extremely helpful in pinpointing what she needs help with (handwriting)
- following the tests the teacher also knows that she is clearly above average ability (despite poor written work), so high expectations for the future
- when DD's hand starts hurting she can take a break from long writing tasks; she gives a "secret sign" to the teacher who then gives her hand-strengthening putty - brilliant!
- she might get extra time or a laptop to type on for SATS and 11+, making it easier for her to show her ability

I believe the label has been very helpful in getting this help - and the school also seems to feel responsible for systematic follow-up.

A blame-fight about the reading glasses will probably not help - look forward and get support rather than revenge! brew

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