Help where do i go from here? im desperate

(2 Posts)
Minxyminion Thu 08-May-14 16:43:48

Hi
Sorry for the long post but feeling so stressed out right now.
My daughter is due to start school in September of this year. She currently is in a special needs nursery. Is globally delayed and is on the waiting list for an autism assessment. She also has hypermobility. Her play and social skills are very delayed. I was told last year to look at possible school options for her and looked around mainstream school, SALT units, autism unit, developmental assessment unit and also a moderate sen school. I don't think she is ready for mainstream whatsoever, and this was also echoed by her EP. The autism unit I didn't feel was suitable either as she is trying to communicate and many of the children in the unit didn't want to communicate- although the unit itself was wonderful I just couldn't imagine her there. I went and viewed our local sen school and thought it was wonderful. My daughter would benefit from the small group setting and everything that they had to offer there and had my heart set on getting her a place. We had previously gone to look at our local SALT unit and I left feeling extremely underwhelmed. The head of the unit showed us around the school and said at break times and lunch times the children from the unit mixed with the mainstream children and were supervised by a lunchtime assistant. The playground was huge with a lot of high climbing equipment and dd has no fear and would literally just climb and either fall- due to hypermobility or jump from the top. She also will only be 4 and there will be children of 11 in the same playground as her and she is extremely vunerable- she is quite "typically autistic." The head of the unit went on to say the children from the unit wear "hi vis" jackets to make them easier to spot amongst the other children- which I think segregates the children from the mainstream children. Carried on looking around and a massive gate that led from the playground onto a 30 mile an hr main road had been left open and any number children could have got out. Once I pointed it out the teacher did quickly go and lock the gate and apologise but didn't take a register to see if any children were missing. For these reasons I didn't think it was suitable for dd.
However, she was offered a place in January this year at the speech and language unit and I didn't know what to do for the best. I rang and spoke to a SEN coordinater who told me that if I accepted the place at the unit she wouldn't be considered for a place at the SEN school, but a decision couldn't be made on that placement until May. I agonised for a month before refusing the place. Fast forward to now and iv just found out that she hasn't been offered a place anywhere else and they are looking to place her in a mainstream setting with 1:1 support. What are my options?? How do I appeal? Can I legally keep her home seeing as she is only 4? She has a statement which is something. I just don't know what to do and fear for her happiness and safety. Thanks for anyone who has managed to read all of this. Im just so stressed out and upset and feel my dd has so much to cope with already, as we are moving to a house with disabled adaptions and I am also 30 weeks pregnant. Just want to run away.

Riv Thu 08-May-14 19:32:00

Really feel for you. Strong positive thoughts coming your way.
Take a really good look at her statement. What does it say she needs? Can the mainstream meet these WITH the one to one support? What might they struggle with? Is there a school mentioned in the last part of her statement?
You need to check out your options and the legal implications. I'd start with the IPSEA website
www.ipsea.org.uk/
(there's a link in the resources bank on here as well) It's a parent's SEN advice - voluntary organisation. They have everything you need to sort this out (apart from your time and willpower) including sample letters and who to contact.
Good luck

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