Co-sleeping, the good and the bad .... comments please?

[mummytowillow]

My daughter is 2.3 and sleeps with me in a kingsize bed, so plenty of room!

I have recently split up with my husband, moved 200 miles and lived in two different houses in the last four months. She always wants to go in Mummy's bed and to be honest I love it to!

Everyone keeps going on and on at me that its bad and I'm 'making a rod for my own back' but I can't see the harm? She has her own, newly decorated bedroom and it is lovely but she doesn't want to sleep in it!

So, what are the good things and the bad things and how can I encourage her to go in her own room and sleep in her bed?

[daisychainz]

I dont think there is anything wrong with your daughter sleeping with you at this age. I am a single Mum and when i first moved to my house my Ds wanted to sleep with me too. Do wants right for you, dont listen to other people. After 6 months of being in my new house my son is fine to sleep on his own. He does still creep into my room in the early hours and i love cuddling with him, it wont last forever, enjoy it while it lasts!

[ilovepiccolina]

Good: makes them feel secure.

Bad: can be awkward to change the routine if you are ill, have too much to drink, or fancy some 'quality' time with DP

[nickytwotimes]

You've moved and split up with your husband, so she is bound to feel a bit needy. Seems fair enough to me. Just keep the option of her own bed open for her - talk about it and ask if she wants to try it, etc. I wouldn't worry about it at all.

[ilovepiccolina]

That 'rod for your own back' expression really makes me . The people who say it are interfering busybodies who think they know what's best for you better than you do.

My dtws slept with us for several months, one of them often for nearly two years. I often found Jean Liedloff's book, The Continuum Concept (about raisingd ch in the S. American rainforest) a good guide - they have 'instinctive', or 'stone age' methods.

So, what would your ancestors have done? Put the lo next door in her own little cave, or cuddled her to sleep until she felt secure enough to sleep on her own? (The answer is the 2nd one, but only until the next baby came along, by which time the dch would be expected to be independent.

[BelleDameSansMerci]

My DD (2.2) ends up sleeping in my bed most nights. This has only been going on for about three weeks but started when she was a little unwell and also developed a sort of concern about dinosaurs (they look in the window, apparently - which is going some as she has blackout blind and curtains but hey). I'm a single parent with a kingsize bed too and, honestly, I love it. Especially when it's cold! I also find she sleeps for longer when she's with me (we had a record sleep until 7:30 this morning). I work full time and I absolutely cannot face the idea of a night spent trying to get her to sleep in her own room when she can cuddle up with me.

I'm not bothered by it really (although I sort of think I should be). I'll reason with her when she's three or maybe four!

The cats don't like it much though as their places have been taken!