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13 week old night wakings - feeling desperate, guilty and confused

4 replies

Kitsilano · 15/02/2008 09:29

My 13 week old's sleep at night seems to be going from bad to worse and I am at a loss and starting to use parenting techniques that I never thought I would. She used to wake once or twice - no probs for me but now wakes every hour and a half through the night and wants to be settled by breastfeeding. I do not feed her to sleep as I know this can cause problems but just calm her and then rouse her slightly as I put her back in her moses basket. She doesn't take a proper feed but just sucks for a couple of minutes each time. Then she's not hungry in the morning because she has been snacking all night. I'm getting pretty desperate and can't nap in the day as I have a toddler.

Last night I fed her at 11pm, 12.45am and 3 am but then decided she simply couldn't be hungry and didn't want to feed her to sleep so let her cry while I patted her and offered her the dummy (after she had stopped sucking properly and was just dzing on the bresat). She fell asleep after about 10mins, woke again at 5am but dropped off own her own within 30 secs. I feel really bad about letting her cry - I never did this with DD1 and it isn't my style but I am at the end of my tether and really don't want to start co-sleeping at this point.

I know people will say she's young and it's normal (though it would seem unusual at 3 months from what I have read to be waking 4 times a night) but things seem to be getting worse and I feel like I may be getting pnd and just can't cope. can anyone help? Is it really so bad to let her cry for 10 mins?

I feel like I am losing my mind and don't know how to handle this any more.

Sorry for deranged rambling.

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motherhurdicure · 15/02/2008 10:06

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charliemama · 15/02/2008 10:22

Kitsilano come and join us on Sleep is for the weak. We share our experiences and support each other. Everybody has had different experinces and nobody judges. It really helped me when my DS2 was doing the same as your DD. His sleep nose dived at 12 weeks. I also felt close to PND. You will get through this. I know how tough it is and I wanted you to know you are a great mum and you are doing nothing wrong.

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charliemama · 15/02/2008 10:23

Sleep is for the Weak

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Kitsilano · 15/02/2008 12:59

Thanks. I'm just so tired that I no longer know what to do for the best. I wish someone could just tell me what I should do. I'm so scared of making her feel abandoned if I let her cry herself to sleep yet I know she isn't hungry - she can't be hungry every 1.5 hours at 3 months old - and I'm not sure I have the strength to give her what she'd really like every night and still function and look after my 2 year old in the day.

I will check out the sleep is for the weak thread.