The dreaded 4 month sleep regression

(20 Posts)
Elfontheedge Mon 19-Sep-16 05:12:19

Awake every hour at night. Only little catnaps through the day. Spending far more time getting DD to sleep than actually sleeping. Hold my hand while I ride it out. How long did it last for yours?

Loraline Mon 19-Sep-16 05:23:32

I'm in the middle of this too. Total misery. DS is 5 months now but is worse than he was a few weeks ago. I know it must end some time but in shattered. Managed to get 3 hours earlier by co-sleeping but not working now.

Elfontheedge Mon 19-Sep-16 07:02:40

Misery is right. I'm not looking forward to getting up and doing the school run today!

JustMeAndHim Mon 19-Sep-16 19:39:39

Same here, I feel like I'm making all the wrong 'sleep associations' and that this will never end. I've gotten to the point where I dread bed times and I just feel like I want to cry! There is a large part of me that worries that this is it now and I've just got a non-sleeper

Cinnamon2013 Mon 19-Sep-16 19:46:32

I'm out the other side - it does end!! Really. Lasted about six weeks for us. It was hell. Sleep still not great but nothing like that awful frenzy.

It WILL end. Do whatever it takes to get through it, don't worry about habits forming etc.

MYA2016 Tue 20-Sep-16 09:27:38

It lasted a while for us... started at 14 weeks and finished at 7 months sad. It was absolute hell you have my full sympathy.

I thought that's just how things were going to be for a few years but at 7 months the wakings dropped from 8-10 a night to 1/2 and now the last 3 weeks he's slept 12 hours straight every night barr 2 (he's 8 months now)
Now I'm waiting for the 9 months regression lol

Elfontheedge Tue 20-Sep-16 21:56:41

On the up-side. When I do get 3-4 hours unbroken sleep again it will feel like the best nights sleep ever!

tiredybear Tue 20-Sep-16 22:06:33

hang on in there, it will get better, I promise. My LO was hit HARD by every regression. I was a sleep deprived tearful zombie for a long time. Don't beat yourself up. Don't waste hours on the net trying to find 'the solution'. Save your energy. Sleep will be yours again, just not for a while. You can do it though.

eddiemairswife Tue 20-Sep-16 22:22:09

Is this a new thing? I had four babies in the 1960s and it never seemed to happen then. My daughter had hers in the 1990s and they didn't have it.

Elfontheedge Tue 20-Sep-16 23:01:24

I think weaning at 4 months had something to do with it possibly. "Baby waking up lots in the night must be hungry. Milk not keeping them going. Must be ready for food." Now we wait until 6 months so it's more noticeable. Could be way off the mark there though.

MYA2016 Wed 21-Sep-16 10:14:57

EDDIE I don't think it's that they didn't exist I think it's just that there was no studies into it back then. From what I can gather there has been research showing at 4 months babies brains change and their sleep patterns change get more into an adults rather than a newborn who sleeps most of the time.
Some babies deal with it fine, others don't.

I guess it's a bit like back in the 1960s (and even the 1990s) mums thought it was okay to smoke when pregnant. Because there was no research to prove otherwise.

user1474026214 Thu 22-Sep-16 11:04:11

I have just posted about this I'm my own thread. It is hideous. I cry every day as I have an older child to care for. I am also worrying that this is it for us and I find the advice so conflicting, I don't know what to do. My HV has nicely told me to just get on with it but I don't know whether I can and be the mother i aspire to be during the day time. It is really hard.

Elfontheedge Thu 22-Sep-16 11:30:51

I promise user it does pass. When DD1 was in the middle of it 4 years ago she woke every 45 mins for 2 weeks. But it passed. Don't worry about perfect parenting now just do what you need to get through.

user1474026214 Thu 22-Sep-16 11:42:25

Thank you elf.
Unfortunately this has been going on for about 7 or 8 weeks. Which is why I am scared it won't pass so quickly...

JustMeAndHim Thu 22-Sep-16 17:58:05

User we are also on about 7 or 8 weeks and no improvement. My concerns are the same as yours, I fear we don't have much of a sleeper 🙈

Loraline Thu 22-Sep-16 20:01:33

Mine has been going that long too but I live in hope. I don't remember ds1 being this bad for this long but maybe in just coped better.

user1474026214 Thu 22-Sep-16 21:01:14

No I don't remember my first being this bad. My husband was telling me about his co worked whose baby only woke up once in the night at this age. I actually feel angry and like a failure. I need to get a grip!!!!!!

Loraline Fri 23-Sep-16 06:39:57

I almost don't want to say this as I don't want to jinx anything but since posting on this thread I've had two good nights - good meaning decent 4 hour stretches of sleep and getting up to feed twice. Maybe, just maybe, it's beginning to ease?

user1474026214 Fri 23-Sep-16 10:53:43

My fingers are crossed for you Loraline!
Last night we had 4. wake ups. Two involved me placing my hands on her and she was asleep within seconds, and two were for feeds. Not great but better than feeding every 90 minutes! It does show though that she doesn't need to be offered the breast for every wake up, which I am pleased about x

Loraline Fri 23-Sep-16 19:30:45

Oh good for you. We used to be able to Sshh-pat ds1 but hasn't worked so far for ds2. Only feeding will settle him.

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