6mo won't sleep ever! we are slowly going crazy HELP!

[Nativitylobster]

Ds2 is about to turn 6mo and he doesn't sleep unless I drive him around or walk for miles with the pushchair (took an hours walk to get him to nod off today). If it's in the car he will wake as soon as I get him out. At night either me or dh will be up until 1 or 2 trying to get him to sleep. This has happened in the last 2 weeks (before that people told us we were blessed as he usually slept 10-7 every night. Lack of sleep is driving us crazy and making us snap at each other. Any ideas would be appreciated!

[MissBeaHaving]

Sympathies Op 2 of mine were the same.
We struggled a lot.
My lovely Aunt bought us a swing that played music for our second non sleeper & it was fantastic,not a miracle worker but it meant I could eat a hot meal or just get a break rather than pushing & rocking constantly.
Hope things improve.

[MsDinosaur]

My baby had two weeks like this at around 6 months but went back to being a good sleeper after that. Sorting out her daytime naps was key. How's his daytime napping?

[snowman1]

How awful - he's lulled you into a false sense of security! I am guilty of this, is he definitely tired before you put him down? is he outgrowing a nap, and how many naps is he having a day? Sometimes not pushing these things will result in everyone being happier. It might improve by itself but you could say you will continue like this for a couple of weeks then decide to drop the driving/walking and see what happens, it isn't fun for anyone and another strategy might work - shush/pat/cuddling (whisper) controlled crying but try and get to the bottom of why a previously happy kid is a bit put out about sleeping. MY 2 are 3 and 6 we've rarely had a full night so I wish I had the answers!

[hebs72]

We have exactly the same here - naps need to be on me/attached to boob, in the buggy or in the car, and DD can't manage more than 45 minutes.

We have a good bedtime routine and she goes down quite easily and sleeps initially for around 2 to 3 hours, then all hell breaks loose. She won't self settle, and has now added waking up 10 minutes after being put down, despite shush pat, white noise, hand on tummy etc. Last night I was up between 1 and 5 trying to get her back down. If my Dh tries, she just becomes more hysterical.

And while I'm grudgingly happy to co-sleep she thrashes around and wants the boob every 30 to 60 minutes, so neither of us get much rest then either. Oh yes, and we've been trying the No-Cry sleep solution for weeks - kinda works for that first stretch but forget it after that. The frustrating thing is that up until nearly 5 months she'd do 5 to 8 hour stretches.

So, since I can really no longer function, I think we're going to try her own room and pick up put down. I really didn't want to, but something's got to give, and I'm plumb out of other ideas.

[hebs72]

Oh, and just to be clear, I don't expect her to sleep through as she's small and breast fed, but I need to find a way to help her out, as she's tired and grumpy more often than not.

[hkt87]

Hebs72 I have exactly the same issues! Slowly going round the bend. I don't know what to do/try. Hubby helpful but at the end of the day, boy is extremely attached to the boob and DH doesn't have those. Joy. And I have a toddler and older DD to contend with in the day. Triple joy.

[Amandajane1357]

I've posted a very similar story on here! I can only assume that they're going through a growth spurt or developmental phase and will be through it in a couple of weeks...

[hebs72]

Dear god I hope so, Amanda, but this is getting worse not better at the moment. Last night was horrific - she woke up whenever I tried to put her down at 8, and then when I finally refused more boob (because they're so damn sore) she had a full scale screaming meltdown, like she's never had before. It went on for an hour, and ended up with me in tears and trying skin to skin to try to calm her down.

And then having to feed her back to sleep - gah!

Please tell me it's got better for you!

[Amandajane1357]

Poor you! After only napping for an hour yesterday, he went to bed about 6.30 (fed to sleep) and woke up about 5 times, including screaming at 4am. Then awake by 5.30. We went through something similar at the 4 month regression and I just took it day by day, keeping the routine in place but nearly always ending up feeding to sleep. Then he just got better slowly. If you research 6mo not sleeping, it looks common! Not helpful for us but at least we're not alone. Try to get rest whenever you can and fingers crossed we'll be through this soon. The Wonder Weeks says this is a tough time for them because there's so much development going on.

[awfulpersonme]

Ours has been like this for months. We just hired a sleep consultant and it's working really well.

[hkt87]

Woke up every 45 mins through the night here. Ended up with me shouting at my husband telling him he doesn't help enough and I'm leaving because I can't face another night. Love exhaustion rows. He did take him off in the car for a few hours so I could sleep.

Tomorrow I'm going to start again with the must-not-feed-to-sleep, 3hr feeds, schedule type thing. It wil be hell. He sleeps attached to boob at present but occasionally will go in his little side car type crib so going to tey to stick with that too. Sadly I suspect he thinks food is the answer to all problems (don't we all.)

Good luck everyone!

[flutterbybutterflies]

I remember a book called the baby whisperer
It was a pale blue book (forgotten author) & it was amazing with sleep tips!

[Amandajane1357]

How is the sleep consultant helping?

[awfulpersonme]

She has written us a sleep plan and routine to follow. It's helping so much. He used to be up every half hour now he's only feeding once overnight and sleeping til 7.

[Amandajane1357]

That's amazing! How old is your LO? Please could you pm me/tell us the consultant's website. Thanks!

[hebs72]

Flutterby - was the book by Tracey Hogg? Secrets of the Baby Whisperer? I got it out of the library today. DH and I are going to spend the next few days formulating our approach, to hopefully start implementing next weekend.

If not, I may also want that sleep consultant's details!

[Amandajane1357]

Let us know how you find the book and if there are any amazing tips! Then I might get it too. Here's to a good night for all 😊

[flutterbybutterflies]

Yes Hebs, that's the one!
Thought it was bloody marvellous

[awfulpersonme]

I didn't get on with the baby whisperer at all. I think it's just a matter of reading around and seeing what works for your baby.

[hebs72]

Status update: have been busy reading this afternoon while DD slept on me for two hours and basically we've been doing it all wrong. According to the baby whisperer anyway......

I will admit that we need to get back on track, though, so I'm trying to have a positive mental attitude, and look at what we can solve, rather than regret what's been. Plus, I enjoyed having a Velcro baby for the first three months

[Amandajane1357]

Interesting! What's her main philosophy? I might order it too!

[TheHubblesWindscreenWipers]

If they were a good sleeper before, it's likely they will be again - something is happening either mentally (new developmental skills, separation angst) or physically (teething.) if you just hang on tgey will likely revert back to how they were.

Ours has been a shot sleeper since birth. We've had eleven months of no sleep - at the worst points he was up every twenty minutes and even now we still have nights like that. We tried sleep consultants, doctor, everything- bog all has worked.

But if yours was ok before, they likely will be again. If they don't want to be put down it could be object permanence/separation angst. They understand you can leave, and of course fear it. We got through that bit with just plenty of love, cuddles and generally limpet like behaviour. We tried more structured routine and it backfired, because his problem was fear we'd leave and we were trying to solve it by leaving him!

[cashmoneyhoney]

I reckon that baby whisperer Tracey Hogg book saved my sanity

[hebs72]

So, I wanted to spend this week prepping - cot out of our room into hers, lots of fun in her own room, try to increase volume of day feeds and decrease frequency etc, with a view to be being set up by next weekend.

But she went into Duracell Bunny moved after tea last night, didn't want more food and didn't want to sleep. So I let her kick about on a mat until the first yawn, and and then into her cot she went......

It took about 35 minutes I guess, and her dummy (not sure if she's supposed to have it, but it seems doubly difficult to change if she's denied anything to suck on as she's always been incredibly sucky). Asleep by 8-ish, briefly awake at 9 and 10.45, and then I fed her at midnight, at which point she went straight back down to sleep. Awake at 2.30 and kept jumping herself back awake, but got her settled by about 4.15. Awake again at 5.30 and fed, before going back to sleep - and I've NEVER got her back in her crib after about 5 in the morning.

Just gone through another 20 minutes of howling for her nap, because again she's too full of food to eat to sleep, but shattered after last night, so she had to go in her cot.

Those wakings may sound awful, but I've always had to feed back to sleep, so to get her off without boob feels like a massive achievement, and she didn't cry for as long as I thought she might (although still long enough for me to feel dreadful).

Am sitting with her now, because I don't want her to feel abandoned if/when she wakes up, as this must be a huge challenge for her. But at the moment I feel encouraged, hopefully it will last.

[Vikkijayne2507]

My ds1 didn't sleep well until after stopping bf at 14 months however a rigid routine and not leaving the bedroom helped, we had gas problems as we do with ds2 10 weeks old but they eventually understand routine and my son goes to bed like a dream ( usually ) and sleeps all night no problems and calls us if something is up, it feels like the end of the world I mutter a lot of horrible things when I so tired but I know it will get better good luck take turns and sleep when you can