Sleep training a baby that projectile vomits when upset

[Burtrix7]

Our 9 month old is progressively becoming a bad sleeper (well he's never been great!). We taught him to self settle fairly easily at around 5 months and although couldn't resettle himself at night, he continued to self settle for naps until he learned to crawl. Now it's a case of doing anything that works to get him to sleep.
He is bottle fed and very rarely falls asleep on his bottle. I used to be able to rock him to sleep (something I don't mind doing) but he now fights this majorly! We have attempted a few sleep training methods but as soon as he's upset he projectile vomits. This obviously can't be a nightly occurrence and is upsetting for him and us.
Any suggestions of how to teach him to self settle? He wakes about twice or three times a night on a bad night which isn't bad but he can be up for two or three hours before he will go back down. I can't leave him even for a few minutes as he is sick within seconds of crying. He also gets upset if I try to sitting next to his cot stroking his hair etc.
Any ideas anyone? Thanks in advance

[FATEdestiny]

There are gentle, no crying ways to help baby learn to sleep. IME these start with a dummy, since babies find ducking soothing and it also stops any crying.

I would remove one dude off the cot, bring it into your room, butt it up to your bed, then start the settling to sleep with you lying on your bed, leaning right into the cot and cuddling baby to sleep. This also helps 'pin baby down' effectively - teaching baby to be still and lying down to sleep. You are right there to sooth, reinsert dummy as needed, cuddle, whatever is needed.

[FATEdestiny]

Dude = side
Ducking = sucking

[MagicAlwaysLeadsToTrouble]

Try looking at the "no cry sleep solution" book.

There are gentle methods you can try, not all sleep training needs to involve leaving them to cry.

[SauvignonPlonker]

My sympathies, OP

My DS had severe reflux & it was worse during colds, teething, illness etc. He would be up for hours at night, then I would have to work the next day. I could have cried from sleep deprivation.

Tried CC & wish I hadn't. It was just awful & he was really sick & distressed - pointless.

He wouldn't take a dummy, but he would suck on a bottle teat (we put water in the bottle) so could settle that way when he was a bit older.

Also tried pick-up-put-down, but again he'd be sick when unwell.

So in the end, We just cuddled him to sleep, not ideal but better than a huge vomit.

we just bought him in to our bed when he woke up at night - he cuddled down & went to sleep. Wish I'd just done that right from the beginning.

[Burtrix7]

Thanks for your replies.
He has a dummy and uses it well most of the time. We did have the cot next to our bed for a long time but we disturbed him so much and he sleeps with white noise on that my husband can't sleep with. Maybe it's something we should reconsider.
I've tried the gradual withdrawal technique but he still gets very distressed.

[Burtrix7]

He used to resettle in our bed but gets quite frustrated now and gets quite angry.
He suffered from reflux a lot when he was a newborn. I guess this is all related.
Thanks again for any advice

[Clutteredmess]

The HV told me to sleep train when DD was 9 months old and I was expecting DS - it was horrific - at one point she started projectile vomiting as we were going up the stairs to bed because she knew she was going to be left. We kept at it for about a month and then she was quite ill (unconnected) and I gave up and co-slept with her and eventually DS til they were about 5.

She is 20 now - still a bad sleeper (possibly connected to her dyspraxia) and I still regret putting us all through it.

[LynetteScavo]

DS1 was just like this!

Can you start by lying with him, then bit by bit withdraw?

DS was about 7yo before we could just read a story, give him a kiss and leave. Which sounds like forever with a baby, but DS1 is now 17, and certainly doesn't want me in his room at all!'

Some babies are just really scared of being alone.