Dropping nap at 2yo

[Trinpy]

My ds is 2.3. Over the past 6-9 months he has been resisting naps and taking longer and longer to get to sleep at night. He was getting very tired in the day and waking lots at night.

Then I had another baby who was very colicky/fussy in the evenings and the combination of the 2 was killing me. So I stopped forcing ds to nap, and moved his bedtime earlier. Mostly this has all been fine.

However, MiL keeps nagging us about how he needs to nap. I ignored her to begin with but after a while I started to doubt myself. Recently ds has been waking up early (6ish) and I when I Googled it (I know) every sleep site said that all 2 year olds need to nap.

So I decided to bring back his nap. It was awful - lots of tears from him and up to an hour just to get him to sleep, then late bedtime (so no chance of an early night for me) and up for the day at 5.30 am. I'm so tired I can't cope, ds is miserable, I'm going back to no naps from tomorrow.

I know I have no other option and I probably need to get a grip but I feel really guilty that I'm not doing things 'perfectly'. I really just want to know whether anyone else had to drop their dc's nap this early and if it turned out to be the right choice.

[HemlockStarglimmer]

I'd have loved a child who napped. She just fell asleep when she was tired and stayed awake when she wasn't.
No two children are the same. I'd go with what works for you and do your best to ignore unwanted advice.

[MaisieDotes]

DD certainly wasn't napping at 2. Maybe not even at 1, but she always went to bed at 7.

DS1 will be 2 in a month and only recently went down from two daytime naps to one. I can see him having some sort of post-lunchtime nap until he's at least 3.

They are all different. I would prioritise going to bed at 7ish over a nap.

[Doje]

DS is 2.5 and he's in the process of dropping his. I'm finding it a minefield just like you. If he naps, it takes him over an hour to get to sleep at night. No nap and he's a tantrumming nightmare come 5pm. He's also awake early some days, and again, like you, everywhere says over tired. And then my mum pipes up with "well you all napped until you want to school!" Helpful. Aaagh. I feel your pain - there seems to be no right way at the moment.

The best I've found is on 'tired' days (about every other day) he gets a 1 hour nap (he'd sleep for 2 if I let him), awake by 2pm, and make sure he gets a run about in the afternoon.

[Trinpy]

Thank you this is all making me feel much better.

Doje - yep ds would nap for 2 hours too if I let him (after first forcing him to sleep in the first place obviously ). Unfortunately if I wake him up after an hour he seems more tired than if he didn't nap at all, which makes me wonder why I bothered at all! I hope your ds makes the transition fairly easily. I do quiet time after lunch and that seems to give ds a boost of energy so he doesn't get overtired/grumpy by teatime.

Maisie I would like my dc2 to be like your ds1 please .

[Doje]

Eugh, he had a 1 hour nap this afternoon, and is now STILL awake!! And that is after two major meltdowns today for which I blamed over tiredness. Whatever I choose doesn't work!!!

OP what does your 'quiet time' look like? I tried this with DS, but he just wanted to follow me around. I ended up putting the telly on.

DS is also particularly grumpy when I wake him after an hour.... Just makes it all the more tempting to give him longer. I want need a break too!!!

[cuntinghomicidalcardigan]

My 20mo only has half an hour or so every other day. He is on the go non stop. He is happy and smiley and goes to bed at 6.30. He wakes a couple of times a night and is up for the day at around 6am. Nothing I have tried changes this, except for if he naps after 3pm then he can be up til gone 11pm. All dc are different. My daughter can go to sleep anytime between 6 and 8 and always sleeps til at least 7am.

[Mycraneisfixed]

Some kids need naps and some don't. DD2 gave up naps before DS who was 13 months older. He napped till he was 4. DGS napped till he was 4. You do what works best for you.

[WorldsBiggestGrotbag]

Mine dropped her nap completely at 18 months. Just said one day that she didn't want to nap, and never has again! No ill effects from what I can tell.
DD2 was born when DD1 was 20 months. I'd have loved just one day of both children at the same time. Just one!

[Trinpy]

Sorry doje, I didn't see your reply. If you're still around...

Re quiet time: we usually cuddle up on the sofa and read books but sometimes we watch TV too. I usually try to put on something gentle like on the night garden but ds sometimes has other ideas. He likes it when I make up a little nest up for him on the sofa with cushions and blankets and he brings his teddies in to sit with him (and occasionally his baby brother if he's feeling generous!).