2hour nightly feeds at 9 months, help!

(15 Posts)
MusicMum18 Fri 22-Jan-16 09:27:43

Hi
Any help would be much appreciated as I am stuck about what to do, if anything....she is up every 2 hours in the night. She's on solids during day, here's routine
LO is finally in a daytime routine, she put herself in one last week.
8.15 breastfeed
9.30 brekkie
10.30 nap, usually for 1-1.5 hrs
12.30 lunch
3.00 breastfeed hen nap usually by...
3.30 nap, usually 1-1.5 hrs
5.30 tea
7.30 bath, breastfeed, bed, usually asleep by 8-8.30

Getting her to sleep is hard but I just go in when she cries little rock to settle, then put back in cot. Then repeat until she goes to sleep, usually takes between 10 mins to 45 mins.

I generally feed her to sleep which hv told me as bad as she wasn't learning to sleep on her own. She naps on her own better during the day, sucks thumb to get herself off, but at night she just can't settle herself.

The pattern at night is, she cries, we leave a little minute to see if she settles, she doesn't, dh or I get her out of cot, into our bed, I breastfeed her to sleep put her back in. Repeat and repeat. She's teething too which I think is adding to her waking up plus when I get her out to feed she is rammed up at top of cot, head in corner etc. she has also learnt to crawl this last couple of weeks.

Last night I tried rocking her instead of taking her in our bed to bf but she cried so I relented as it was 2am and I was shattered.

Any ideas as to how I could get her to sleep longer? Could I chang bedtime? Or should I rock and refuse breast? Don't want to do that? Or just ride it out?

Any advice much much appreciated.

Love from. Totally exhausted mummy xxxx

tiredybear Fri 22-Jan-16 11:20:50

Hi, I really feel for you!

My LO is 9.5months now, and I have been exactly where you are. At 8 months I finally decided to start nightweaning. It was tough and needed both me and dh to be fully committed. We took it in turns to resettle him. It took longer than I'd hoped as we had to cope with colds and teething in the midst of it, so we took a break until he was better again.

Beforehand, I slept in another room and dh just bought him in for a feed, so I was as rested as I could be. This helped me to be more able to cope with the nightweaning.

The key thing is consistency. Decide what you want to do, then stick with it, for naps and night time. We went with shush pat. We avoid picking him up out of the cot unless he gets very distressed. Even then, it's just a quick cuddle til he calms, then back in. We spent a LONG time with our hand on him, rocking and patting him to sleep. It didn't take long for him to stop wanting the feeds, but he still wakes up a lot. It's definitely getting better though. There have been a few nights recently when he's slept 7-4, which is just amazing for me!

He's not fully nightweaned as he consistently demanded food around 4/5, so I figured he wasn't ready to go completely through the night without a feed yet. I'm gonna try and drop that one in the next month or so.

About 2 weeks ago though, it got worse than ever, literally no sleep between 12-5ish for 4 nights in a row. He just couldn't stay asleep and got so cross. Nothing would soothe him. He's recently got A LOT more mobile though so I think it was connected.

Good luck! xxx

Cleensheetsandbedding Fri 22-Jan-16 12:08:35

It's hard because ultimately you want them to get back to sleep fast so you can get back to sleep so you end up giving in.

I read the baby sleep wisperer and it really helped. My friend is in the same position and her dd is 13 months old is on her breast all night. She is exhausted and struggling at work but she can't/won't stop.

Ughnotagain Sat 23-Jan-16 10:00:52

I could have written this. My 8 month old woke up so many times last night. She feeds to sleep and then ends up coming into our bed because I can't face sitting up to feed her to put her down and have her wake up, and at least if I lay down to feed I can doze as well.

Some mornings I have to be up at 6 for work. I'm knackered!

MusicMum18 Sat 23-Jan-16 10:55:39

It's soooo nice to know I'm not the only one!!
Last night I can't even remember how many times I fed, I was so tired I couldn't even get up to go and get dd and she's only in the next room. Feel like a liability taking dd back to bed too, as often I can't muster strength to open my eyes, feels like a sleepwalking daze. Sometimes I come to and worry why she isn't on my boob, only to remmeber I put her in the cot. Sleep deprivation does crazy things!
I looked about night weaning on the kellymom website, the advice is that they will wean when they are ready, but as tiredybear said you can do things to help them on their way, eg patting, shushing etc. I do bit of rocking then put down, leave, sit on top stair, if she cries go back in rock, put down, sit on top stair, repeat and repeat to she goes to sleep.
Don't know whether to try this at night, keep her awake after feed then put down but it seems like total lunacy at the early hours of the day!

2snugglets Sat 23-Jan-16 11:01:18

Hoe would you feel about giving her a bottle of formula before bed. This is how I got both mine off wanting a breast feed all night long. I was so exhausted a health visitor actually insisted u should, they started sleeping through straight away!
Good luck X

Ughnotagain Sat 23-Jan-16 13:26:59

My DD is still in with us so it's easy to grab her in the night! I've considered putting her in her own room but it's on another floor and I can't face the thought of doing the stairs in the night!

MusicMum18 Sat 23-Jan-16 17:33:09

Snugglets, thanks for suggestion but I hard tough time feeding at first, did mixed feeding and expressing, used nipple shields etc etc at 5 months she just wanted bottle in day and me at night, then she went to full bf. I'm worried about giving her bottle as she might go off me again, when I've worked hard to go full bf. these babies are unpredictable little things arggghhhh!!

MusicMum18 Sat 23-Jan-16 17:33:36

Might try more water during the day though that might help smile

TwoLittleBlooms Sat 23-Jan-16 17:55:23

No advice but watching for some ideas. I have to disagree with 2nugglets though - formula doesn't always equate to full night of sleep. My little one is still waking during the night (12 months) but not breast fed / ebm fed since 8 months. She is now on prescription formula -and wakes at least 3 times a night before starting the day at 5 (falls asleep usually between 7 and 9.30 at night).

TwoLittleBlooms Sat 23-Jan-16 17:56:24

sorry 2snugglets

MusicMum18 Sat 23-Jan-16 22:21:06

Maybe they're scared about waking up on their own? Must be weird for them having friendly loving faces around them all day then being put in a cot on their own in the dark! Have people tried night lights? I tried orange one then blue one neither seemed to make a difference! Also tried without gro bag, also tried just in nappy whacking heating up, also changing temp!! I do feed her to sleep in night tho so she might wake up and want me?? If so should I be brave and try a few nights keeping her awake after night feeds?? But then it'll take me ages to settle her!! I can't bring myself to do the cry it out approach although I've heard it works!

BiscuitMillionaire Sat 23-Jan-16 22:34:59

the advice is that they will wean when they are ready - at 9 months, she isn't waking because of hunger. My sister told me this one when my DS was waking every 2 hours to bf: imagine that someone tells you that every time you wake up they'll give you a £20 note - you would keep waking up, right? Read the Baby Whisperer books - babies naturally half-wake every 90 minutes or so. The crucial thing is, they either soothe themselves back into deep sleep, or they wake up and cry for you to do it for them - especially if you're doing it for them by giving them a lovely cuddly drink of milk.

I cracked when DS was 8 months and realised he was never going to sleep for more than a few hours unless I did something. I used the Baby Whisperer 'pick-up put-down' method, to great effect. I've posted about it on here loads, apologies. You need to read all about it on www.babywhispererforums.com/. It's way gentler than controlled crying because you don't leave your baby to cry alone, you pick them up when they cry properly, but put them down again before they're asleep. The 'shush pat' method is for younger babies.

You don't have to suffer sleep deprivation like this! Good luck.

ftmsoon Sun 24-Jan-16 06:47:50

IMO, I disagree that waking in isn't hunger at this age. DD still wakes in the night at 20 months and gets milk as the cry is definitely one of hunger and I can often link it to her not having eaten much in the day.
You need to do what you think best, read all the advice and websites above and then judge your baby yourself.

MusicMum18 Sun 24-Jan-16 12:17:33

Biscuit and fit soon thanks for advice... Last night it was every half hour between midnight and 3 then seemed like a longer sleep till 5 then at 7.30 wake up. There's no pattern. She was just waking up once or twice in a night but that's changed now. Think it's definitely to do with teething and starting to crawl etc. thanks so much for info on baby whisperer, going to register for the forum. I do the whole pick up put down it takes ages though, she ends up sucking her thumb for comfort to get herself off to sleep. Yet though it took me 45 mins to get her to nap only for her to nap for half and hour arggghhhh!! I'm going to keep trying this method during the day and hope she gets better then maybe transfer to night

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