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Please please help me figure out what I can do to stop waking up in the early hours of the morning......

27 replies

foxinsocks · 27/10/2006 09:11

I have been under a bit of stress recently but essentially, it's all sorted out now and isn't on my mind as much. My dh snores, which used to wake me up all the time, but I now wear ear plugs and they block out almost all the noise.

I also take omeprazole (stomach acid suppressor) so I'm not waking up from nausea or pain anymore.

BUT I am STILL waking up EVERY single sodding day at either 3am or 4am and I CANNOT get back to sleep. Doesn't matter what time I go to bed, be it 9pm or 11pm, I still wake up at that time.

This morning I looked in the mirror and I've actually got triple bags under my eyes and I really do resemble something from a horror movie. Also, it means I'm finding the kids harder to handle. We're off swimming this morning and honestly, the thought of it fills me with dread - my eyes sting, my head hurts and I feel ill with tiredness .

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Pruni · 27/10/2006 09:15

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foxinsocks · 27/10/2006 09:21

I do try that relaxation breathing because generally, I'm quite good at it but this morning, I realised I'd been doing it (and feeling nice and relaxed!) for over an hour and still not gone back to sleep!

I just wonder whether the combination of dh's snoring and the stomach problem (which did genuinely wake me up in the night for months on end) has meant that I've become so accustomed to waking up in the night that I cannot sleep through anymore . But I'm so exhausted, my head feels all cloudy and I really don't want to go to the GP for the millioneth time this year.

I just wonder whether sleeping pills would only help me get to sleep rather than keep me asleep?

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Pruni · 27/10/2006 09:23

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Wordsmith · 27/10/2006 09:30

Foxinsocks - I think it's probably because you've become so used to waking up in the night you've got yourself into sort of a pattern. I suffer from it myself. Something wakes you up - probably you heare DH snore or something outside the house, then you start thinking about something that's stressed you out/occupied you during the day, or something that worries you, and you just can't get back to sleep.

The only way I can do it is to put the light on and read a book/the paper for a while. It clears my mind of what I've been worrying about and if I read lying on my side I gradually fall asleep anyway.

I've been like this about 60% of the time since DS2 was born. He's not a very good sleeper - he's not so bad now but the habit takes ages to break.

I guess all I could suggest is go to bed as early as you can - at least you're getting about 5 or 6 hours a night then.

Do you get to sit down with the kids in front of the Tv for half an hour during the day? I usually doze when i do this!

Also if you get a lot of fresh air/exercise during the day it might help. Or try a yoga class in the evening?

Sorry can't provide a solution - but I think you're right to try and avoid pills.

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foxinsocks · 27/10/2006 09:31

no, I'm pretty sure I'm not depressed. I don't feel sad or unhappy - I'm just pissed off I'm not sleeping. I have had a lot on my plate and I do dread the Xmas season but even so, once I'm awake, apart from feeling knackered, I do actually feel pretty chipper!

Maybe I'll get some Nytol and see what it does....

thanks for helping Pruni

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foxinsocks · 27/10/2006 09:34

yes, that's exactly what it's like wordsmith

I also think (rather shamefully) I'm probably not doing enough exercise but it's such a vicious circle because I'd like to do some but I am sooooooooo tired

Also, apart from dh's snoring, for the first couple of years of dd and ds's lives, they both woke all the time with asthma, reflux, croup etc. and then once they started sleeping, dh's snoring woke me up, then the stomach thing.....but now I have had a little bit of a hard time and suddenly find that I really need my sleep and just cannot get enough of it!

I will try and lie down on the couch at lunchtime today - I find now that as soon as I sit down in front of the TV after lunch, I fall asleep straight away (though never for longer than 20 mins).

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Wordsmith · 27/10/2006 09:38

20 mins is probably just what you need - I find that I really feel tired after lunch, I'm fine in the morning. It's awful if I have a bad night when I have to go to work the next day. I work in a really cramped, stuffy office. yesterday I had to research landfill statistics on the Internet at around 11am and how I stayed awake I shall never know!

Thinking about it I would really recommend yoga in the evening - the relaxation techniques it teaches you are great.

Do you ahve a spare bed you could spend a few nights in so you know you won't be woken up by snoring?

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foxinsocks · 27/10/2006 09:45

no, we don't have a spare room. I could turf dh onto the couch but I'd still hear him snoring .

Part of me wants to go away for the night but I really don't think sleeping in another bed will make any difference - and if it didn't, I'd probably be even more pissed off!

This morning, I think I may well have slept through but ds woke up and turned the light on in our room because he'd wet the bed ggrrrrr which woke me up straight away.

If it happens tonight, I might try and get up and come downstairs and walk around a bit till I feel tired again.

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Wordsmith · 27/10/2006 11:01

Ooh no - going away and sleeping in a strange bed will be even worse, IMO.

We do have a spare room with a sofabed which is never 'erected' unless we have overnight guests. It's not the sort of thing you could do in the dead of night so I tend to come down and lie on the sofa. Sometime I make myself a cuppa but I always read to take my mind off my worries. You probably find your worries are in fact worries that you'll never get to sleep again.... vicious circle!! We have a blanket downstairs for just such occasions (I sometimes make DH sleep on the sofa when he's been out for a skinful and comes in late, stinking of beer and smoky pubs and ready for a good old snore.)

I was having a great nights sleep the other night but then DS2 came into our room at 5.30 (we allow him in the bed if he wakes after 5, which probably isn't a good idea) and then DS1 woke too, very unusually for him. So they were both in our bed at 5.40! I didn't get back to sleep. Strangely enough DH just turns over and carries on sleeping through the constant wriggling and whispering.

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foxinsocks · 27/10/2006 12:13

yes dh does that too - he can sleep through anything

we were living very close to Hammersmith Bridge when the bomb went off on it and dh slept through the bomb blast and all the sirens!

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Mumpbump · 27/10/2006 12:19

You've probably tried some of this already, but...

Relaxing bath before bedtime - get dh to scrub your back or wash your hair for you! So much more relaxing when someone else does it...

Lavender oil on your pillow

Something starchy for dinner or hot milky drink after bath

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JackieNoHeadJustABloodyStump · 27/10/2006 12:25

Rather strangely, I find that if I wake up, what helps me get back to sleep is getting up and wandering around for five minutes, so I get a bit chilly, then getting back into a nice warm bed - the warming back up seems to help me get back to sleep. Hope you find something that works for you.

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foxinsocks · 27/10/2006 12:35

thanks both of you

I'll definitely get up tomorrow if I wake up (and here's hoping I won't!)

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Furball · 27/10/2006 12:44

foxinsocks - I suffer from the same but I'm not tired in the day. I wake up at 2.55am precisely! Wide awake, so I come downstairs, make a nice hot drink and sit with my laptop until I feel sleepy again which is normally about 5 - 5.30, I then creep back upstairs, sometimes I just lie there sometimes I do go back to sleep before dh's alarm goes off at 6.30! I don't know what to suggest for you as I've tried loads of things and it just seems to be a way of life now. Every 3rd or 4th night I go out like a light and don't move all night until the alarm, like my body is catching up. I've learn't to enjoy the peace and quiet whilst I can and the sleepless nights have just slotted in to my life.

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foxinsocks · 27/10/2006 12:53

I really hope it is not a permanent thing. I don't know how you manage. I feel dreadful when I wake up (but not tired enough to go back to sleep) but by about now, I'm starting to feel semi-human.

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JackieNoHeadJustABloodyStump · 27/10/2006 12:59

Oh, and I definitely sleep better when I've got warm feet - I wear bedsocks almost all year round.

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foxinsocks · 27/10/2006 13:04

lol - funny you say that because dh likes his feet sticking out the end of the bed so my feet often end up getting cold (mmm ponders whether something as simple as wearing socks in bed will solve the problem)

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JackieNoHeadJustABloodyStump · 27/10/2006 13:06

Maybe an adult grobag?

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Littlefish · 27/10/2006 13:07

Lavender oil in the bath before bedtime, and then a few drops on my pillow definitely means I sleep better.

Is there anything else that could be waking you up? Does your heating come on at a certain time? When our heating first starts coming on, it always wakes me up.

Have you tried a yoga class? Acupuncture can sometimes help with sleep problems too.

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foxinsocks · 27/10/2006 13:09

heating not on yet - but I haven't investigated other causes. We used to get foxes peeing and howling in front of the house but I don't think it is fox time of year.

lol at adult grobag - the ultimate passionkiller - but mmm I bet it would lovely and warm and cosy!

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foxinsocks · 27/10/2006 13:12

I have some lavender stuff but it sets off my sinuses a bit - I will try though. I'll try blummin anything at the moment but I'm trying to remain calm about it because if I let it get to me, I'll definitely not be able to break the cycle.

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JackieNoHeadJustABloodyStump · 27/10/2006 13:13

Maybe hypnotherapy? Might give you some more 'tools' to help you deal with it? Or overcome it completely, with any luck.

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Littlefish · 27/10/2006 13:14

I'm sure I read somewhere that turkey releases sleepy hormones if you eat it for supper. I know it sounds really unlikely - but it might be worth a try.

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foxinsocks · 27/10/2006 13:17

thanks - if it goes on for longer than a few more nights I will have to take something I think - either that, or I'll go out and get completely arthured and hope that sends me off for the night!

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covenoveneer · 27/10/2006 13:24

I can totally sympathise foxinsocks. I have no trouble geting to sleep but wake upin the early hours just like you, probably 4 out of 7 nights. Have tried nytol and various other things. One thing I do find helps a bit is to have a notepad on my bedside table, so if I am fretting about something that I need to do etc I can write it down. Other than that I have just learnt to live with it.

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