Tell me what is happening in the night here

[IdaClair]

I have a 2yo who has always needed quite a lot of input in the night - I'm fine with that, really, I don't think one or two night wakings is unreasonable and if she needs someone, she needs someone, and that is fine. And like a walk in the park compared to what she used to be like!

What we have now though is a situation where she has hysterics twice a night. She will scream her head off like she is having the worst tantrum imaginable and will not be comforted - she does not want to be picked up or put down, held, talked to, rocked, whatever you do is wrong. She can't be tempted out of it and it has to run its course. The screaming usually lasts 20-25 minutes before she is all screamed out and will settle into a hiccoughy blotchy mess. She can't explain what is happening. Then she needs properly resettling, we basically have to do bedtime again, books and milk, because she needs to wind down after being so distraught. The whole process takes up to an hour. And then she does it again.

The usual times for it are between 12.30-1am then 3.30-4am. Nobody is getting much sleep, and although I'm mostly used to that, it is waking other children and neighbours too.

I don't expect her to magically sleep through the night but these screaming fits are tough to deal with and I would love to know what is going on. I worry about her teeth having milk in the night and also it affecting her appetite. And no one is happy having a toddler running round the upstairs screaming for all she is worth!

[PuddingAndHotMilk]

I have just come onto MN to write exactly the same post about my 18mo. Sorry I have no advice but I do have bucketloads of empathy. I came to bed at 9:30 to get a good stint in before her 1/2am histrionics and she woke at 21:50. Shes now relaxed on the breast but I've just lost another 2 hours ??
Ive tried Ashton and Parsons, calpol, nurofen, voodoo and witchcraft so far
Hope we both get some sleep now !

[juniorcakeoff]

Night terrors? Or if there are any other issues going on, my dc2 did this and he had grade 4 tonsils which were giving him sleep apnoea.

[ireallydontlikemonday]

I was going to say night terrors too - does it seems like she's asleep with her eyes open if that makes sense?

[Artesia]

Another one suggesting night terrors. DS1 had them at that sort of age. Was terrifying until I worked out what it was, as I couldn't understand why he couldn't seem to hear me or tell me what was wrong.

If that's what it is, there isn't much you can do I am afraid, and is scant comfort at the time, but they really do grow out of it.

[IdaClair]

Thanks. Sorry there are others.

She doesn't seem asleep with her eyes open, she seems like she is having an almighty tantrum. But she doesn't know why. And we don't know why. And we offer her everything we could ever think of and it does not help.

Two a night for the last two nights. my typical sleep is 2am-4am, 5am-7am. Hers is 8-12.30, 1.30-4am, 5am-7am.

It doesn't seem enough for either of us!

[GrumbelinaPicklebottom]

Does she have all her teeth yet? If not, have you tried pain relief before bed?

My son is 2y4mo, and is still in the process of cutting his 2 year molars. He frequently wakes screaming from his afternoon nap, and it can sometimes last up to half an hour. He's pulling at his ears and swallowing so I am pretty sure it's his teeth bothering him. Giving ibuprofen before his nap sometimes helps.

[GrumbelinaPicklebottom]

Sorry - posted too soon. Meant to add that he seems okay at night, for some reason.

[IdaClair]

Thanks. She has all her teeth, I think. But obviously that doesn't rule out teething or some other pain. Twice again last night.

[blushingmare]

That sounds tough Ida. We haven't had it quite as bad as that, but did go through a spell of DD (same age) waking and having histrionics that sound similar, although not as prolonged as your DD's. We eventually worked out that she was afraid of the dark and since leaving her night light on haven't had any more. Worth a try if you haven't already.

[LoombandsRus]

We had similar with DD at same age. It passed after a short while. Never really worked it out, but the stopping did coincide with her being toilet trained - I have a feeling that the two things are not unrelated but that is not exactly a scientific explanation.

I hope it passes very soon for you. It is hard seeing them so hysterical and not being able to soothe them.

[HappyAsASandboy]

We had similar with our daughter, and I think it was night terrors.

Although it seems counterintuitive, what worked best for us was to take DD out of the bedroom, to somewhere brightly lit like the bathroom, and try to let her sort herself out. We held her but not cuddling (if that makes sense?), spoke loudly, but not asking questions/expecting a response, and let the light/temp change/noise (echoey bathroom!) jolt her out of it. This reduced the 'attacks' to about 5 mins, and DD was easier to calm down and get back to sleep.

Remember, this too shall pass ....