Nearly 3 Year Old will not sleep

[catgirl1976]

DS is nearly 3.

He has very active days with a nap of around 1 - 1.5 hours.

We put him down to bed between 7:30pm and 8pm. He always has the same routine of wind down, warm milk, bath, teeth, stories, lights out.

He just will not go to sleep. He's never been a great sleeper but this is getting worse. Last night it was gone 11pm before he went to sleep.

He shouts, he cries and he winds himself up till he is hysterical. He says he "can't sleep". We generally go up to him (not immediately) when he starts, tell him it's time to sleep and we love him. Sometimes we do end up giving him some water as he has shouted himself hoarse. Sometimes I do give in and give him another story or a cuddle, though we try to stick to "boring but reassuring".

He won't have the lights out in the corridor - he gets scared if they go out but I think the extra light isn't helping him drop off. We've tried a soft night light in his room but that scares him . He won't have the door shut (full meltdown.)

He wakes in the night - same thing. Last night as I say it was gone 11pm when he finally went down then he woke at 4am. I had to get him up at 7am for work and nursery. We all shattered, including him

I just don't know what to do.

I was thinking of putting some really relaxing music playing outside his room tonight (like you get when having a massage) - I don't know if that will do anything but I am at my wits end and ANY suggestions would be great

Thank you

[BustyCraphopper]

Since my dd was 2 any sort of nap means she wouldn't sleep until 10pm or 11.

Have you tried dropping the nap or doing it for alternate days maybe? Or if he realy needs the nap push bedtime back until 9 until he drops the nap?

[catgirl1976]

I've tried dropping the nap, but it doesn't seem to make any difference :(

[JemimaButtons]

I could've written your post last week.

WhT worked for us:

Drop the nap.

Then at bedtime you know for sure he's tired.

Then get a talking book or nursery rhymes on a CD player or iPad and leave him to it. I put my DS's favourite nursery rhyme on loop and leave the lights on. Then switch off both later once he's asleep. If he's properly screaming, then I go in and comfort him for a bit.

[MadeinBelfast]

We've the same problem here, I feel your pain! Watching with interest...

[Rumandcokeplease]

Defo drop the nap, if my 2 year old even has 10 minutes she's up until late! When she went from a 2 hour nap to no nap (her doing, not mine!) she was in bed for half 5!

[TarkaTheOtter]

We dropped the nap in the same situation and it worked I'm afraid.

We've also got her a lamp which she can use and encourage her to look at books in bed quietly until she is ready to sleep. She is always asleep by the time I finish feeding her baby brother and I turn the lamp off then. On the positive side she will also now look at books in her bedroom for a bit when she wakes in the morning too.

[catgirl1976]

Ok, I'll try dropping the nap again

Though god knows I need the downtime. But I guess I'm sacrificing sleep at night which is worse

Just put him to bed. He's had about 5 hours sleep last night and a full on day at nursery and the screaming has commenced already :( :(

[ThisBitchIsResting]

That is a very long nap. Definitely go cold turkey on naps and it will help once his system adjusts.

[TarkaTheOtter]

Tell me about it. I had to drop DDs nap for this reason soon after ds was born we have TV time quiet time now instead.

[catgirl1976]

Fingers crossed it will work

I'm listening to him screaming now and it's horrible. So stressful and it makes me feel like a terrible parent

I've been up, told him I love him but it's sleep time.

It's been an hour now :(

He's currently screaming because he wants his stick (an actual stick. from the garden )

[LaPetiteCoccinelle]

We dropped the nap (which I hated doing but it worked). At first it meant awful tantrums/crying anytime between 4 and 7, then it reduced to just one tantrum and now we sometimes dont have any!

And hes gone from taking 45-60mins before falling asleep around 9.30/10pm to falling asleep in lesd than 5 minutes at 7.30. The difference for my sanity is unbelievable.

I also play a CD of classical music for DS. One it calms him and sends him to sleep and two it helps mask the noise of us cooking etc. For an hour after hes gone to sleep.

I will admit that I sit with DS until hes asleep though. I always have, tho 5 minutes is sooooo much better than when it was one hour!